⌗﹕ Fuyuki

Trace/diaracial , creator of ctdr/ctde Radqueer, plural, 🇨🇳 🇯🇵

[fuyukisworld]

Changing my world to how I wish it to be.

⋆˚꩜｡𓂃˖ ࣪⊹ PLURal, radqueer, profic, subliminal maker

Fuyuki / Yuxuan ──꒰✉️꒱ ❞ ‧₊˚ 20

⋆ ִֶָ ๋𓂃🎐 ⋆ he / xe ⋆𐙚 ˚ 🇨🇳🇯🇵

Alt acc @divinexinyu

Trace journey :

I would like to start by saying I was born partially asian, mixed with Japanese. No, my other race was not white. I will not disclose what it was since I dont want any part of that race tied to me.

Due to unfortunate cirsumstances my biological parents could not care for me, resulting in me being adopted by a white couple. I do not blame them for what happened, I guess they assumed I was Chinese when they adopted me. They were close to a Chinese family, and them wanted me to grow up with my "culture" they let the Chinese family basically become my second family in raising me.

Because of this, I grew up ethnically Chinese. It wasn't later until I found out I was actually Japanese. As I lived my life as a Chinese person, I couldnt seperate from that identity. This caused great distress in my life as I struggled with what I learned. It was only until multiple years later that I learned about "transracial" and later "rcta", which heavily resonated with me and my experience which started this journey.

˚ ༘ .˚🌱୭ ˚. ᵎᵎ Transids :

Perma

Permadaydreaming, daywalker, inumimi, constraharmed, permaobsessed, permabruised, permaarmbandage

Cis

cisbpd, cisdid, cisautistic, cisadhd, cisasian, cisjapanese, cismedicallyill, cisdisabled, cistraumatized

Tris

trisshscars, trisvictim, trisguitarist, trisvkei

Trans

Transchinese, transorigionalcharacter, transaccent, transamab, transpermahigh, mutojapanese, tracerace, transethnicity, transdoomedyaoi, transmemory, transdiagnosed, transbatwings, transvoice, transfang, transpupil, transjapaneselegend

[fuyukisworld]

i rlly appreciate your blog!

Thank you. Ive been getting alot of dms and comments mainly on my tiktok with stuff like this.

Im always happy that my content has and still helps people find, discover and help themselves on their journey.

[fuyukisworld]

What is the difference between internalized racism and racial dysphoria (genuine question)

Sorry for the late reply, but lets get into it! First, lets break down what internalized racism and dysphoria in general is.

“Internalized racism is the internalization of beliefs about racism and colonization that contribute to the acceptance of negative messaging or stereotypical misrepresentations that inform perceptions about worth and ability.” - NIH

“Internalized racism, or appropriated racial oppression, is a phenomenon that people of color (POC) experience when they adopt aspects of racism by accepting negative messaging about their worth and abilities based on their ethnic or racial group membership [1,2,3]. In other words, “the oppressed will identify and emulate the oppressive actions of their oppressor” - NIH

These two paragraphs hopefully will give anyone a goof grasp on internalized racism. Internalized racism is usually complied of these common things ; American beauty standards, devaluation of one’s own group, experience of strong negative emotions related to one’s own racial group (shame, self-hatred, or guilt). It’s all based in White dominant culture and informed by Eurocentric ideologies and colonization.

-

In this case, Atypical dysphoria is a more accurate description. While it is not a medically recognized term, it is a common symptom of those who have BIID(Body Integrity Identity Disorder), which a person experiences an intense, persistent desire to have a physical disability. While BIID doesnt include feelings of identifying as a different race and ethnicity, they share very similar symptoms.

Dysphoria in general is simply described as a profound state of unease, dissatisfaction, or general unhappiness. The experience if it is not in general categorized as a mental disorder, but more as an emotional response. Atpyical dysphoria is when a person has dysphoria surrounding uncommon things, including race/ethnicity, age, species, anything as long is it genuinely affects the person on a negative scale.

Racial/ethnic dysphoria is simply the same as any other kind of dysphoria, including gender dysphoria, but is in regard to one’s race/gender. Having dysphoria doesnt mean someone has internalized issues like racism and misogyny, while it may be the case for some thats an individual issue and not a collective one.

[fuyukisworld]

thoughts on dna subliminals? I wanted to start listening to subliminals with the hope that getting a heritage test would give me at least a small percentage of my DE dna in the results. is that possible?

I’m personally unsure. I haven’t really used dna subliminals or subliminals in general, I used to use appearance and language ones mainly awhile back.

I do believe that manifestation and revision are very real and powerful tools you can use to your advantage.

[fuyukisworld]

Does anyone have any ACTUAL good radqueer servers that are pro-transharm identities and actually accept paras n such??

I deadass cant find shit on disboard

[fuyukisworld]

One strange thing that gives me major ethnic dysphoria, gender dysphoria and just dysphoria and general is my body hair. Just having it seriously makes me want to die at times. I cannot go outside in shorts EVER unless I pre-plan and shave in advance.

I want so bad to permanently remove it all from my body so I never have to deal with it ever again.

[itss1ava]

i'm alive and well however I severely scared my poor boy.

i made him overthink, go crazy, have doubts, and left him in a very vulnerable state.

it's not that I necessarily feel guilty, I'm simply self-aware enough to admit it.

I apologize for frightening you my dear.

[fuyukisworld]

Im sobbing tearing off my skin ripping my hair out throwing up violently

i think i like this guy look how sweet he is oh my god even though he thinks im too woke

I forgive you its okay 😭😭

[fuyukisworld]

thoughts on pineapples?

Not right now daddy wants to hurt himself

[fuyukisworld]

People call me crazy and delusional but im ALWAYS right about stuff and nobody ever listens to me. Im cursed i say CURSED. I feel these things in my very soul and then it reveals itself to me.

[fuyukisworld]

Hi there

I saw your account on TikTok and I thought talking to you could've helped, you seem understanding. I don't know who else to talk to. I'm a 22 year old man. I was born and raised in Europe, by a European family (not disclosing the country, because I don't want it to be tied to me in any way). My whole childhood, I grew up with interests related to East Asia. Mainly Japan, then South Korea, then China. Of course, as a kid I couldn't inform myself much, all I knew at first was martial arts, anime, manga and donghua (a bit about cuisine, too). Growing up I got into the cuisine, culture, languages, traditions, history, arts. Overall everything, not only the media (since people usually assume that). I never felt at home in the country I was born in. I feel uncomfortable and out of place here. I just don't belong. My father used to force his culture on me and still does, despite me making it explicit I have 0 interest and 0 love towards said culture. Usually, people my age and gender don't feel that way, so I've been keeping it to myself. Until I found out about transracialism. However, I've noticed people usually think that whoever claims to feel connected to China, Japan and South Korea all at once, is a bait or a fetishizer. Ain't my case. Been feeling that way my whole life. I almost feel like I have a soul bond with said countries. Almost like a soulmate, y'know? I've been bullied over this during my childhood, because East Asia wasn't as "trendy" as it is now. I'm glad EA gained the recognition it deserves, but I despise trend hoppers who used to hate and discriminate, then suddenly changed their minds just to follow what's popular. As of now, I don't even know what I am (are there even requirements to be trace?) but I feel like I'll never truly be at home nor accepted because of the way I grew up and I look. Not to mention I would have to save up for years before being able to leave this place, since I have 0 support from my family. The fact "rcta" became a cringey thing on TikTok, makes me feel even worse, because I know I won't be taken seriously. That's it, I just need to feel valid and rant a bit. Thanks for reading.

Thank you for reaching out. First please know that your experiences are completely valid and you are not alone. The only “requirement” to be trace is just to not identify as the race you born into for whatever reason, what you have described to me seems to have some spiritual elements.

Feeling connected to multiple ethnic identities under the same racial umbrella doesnt mean you are a fetishizer or faking, especially if these feelings have persisted for years. The issue stems from mainly tiktok, it was common for baits to fake being trace, claim to be all 3 while portraying very harmful stereotypes and racism.

I have friends who are multiethnic and ethnicfluid, meaning they identify as multiple different ethnic identities and the level of how much they feel as a certain one can fluctuate. I also know many whos trace identity is connected to spirituality, primarily past life connections.

You will find support here, my friend. There is a whole community waiting for you, who understands and sees you. It’s up to you whether or not you want to step in.

[fuyukisworld]

Somehow we managed to gain 5kg and I was absolutely horrified, so i’ve been trying very hard to watch what we eat now. Luckily i’ve already lost 2.5kg, my goal is to lose double what I gained for discipline. Ughh im so embarrassed with myself.

[fuyukisworld]

Suck my dick like a good bitch

Slava why are you sending me these sorts of asks here? This isn’t even my page, fool. Go send on the correct account and i’ll reply according、宝贝

[fuyukisworld]

i feel like a terrible person for being a transblack person who makes hiphop music

Thats the most coolest thing ever though? Being transblack and being able to create music thats within a popular genre in your race? Hiphop is very prominent in black culture and spaces, its awesome that youre contributing to that. I hope one day ill come across your music!

[fuyukisworld]

I know you were born mixed asian but what do you think about the people who weren’t born asian at all? Do you think they should be able to change their race to Asian/mixed Asian?

Guys… im RADQUEER. Of course I support those who werent born asian at all identifying as asian for whatever reason, I dont care!!! Many of my transrace friends werent born asian. Idgaf, it doesnt affect me, its none of my business and their identity as asian is just as valid is anyone elses.

[fuyukisworld]

No way I got denied from a popular radq server bc I believe disorders exist not even as a negative thing or something everyone has to identify as 😭 denied me for saying the big 3(paraphilias) are classified as disorders but not everyone views/feels the are such

Im so confused bro

[fuyukisworld]

How can you spot a fetishizer in the transrace community

I personally think its fairly easy, primarily on tiktok, but here are a few things ive noticed that are consistent with fetishizes/bait(mostly tiktok)

many fetishizers will have layouts consisting of unrealistic expectations, goals and desires. What I mean is identifying as 3+ ethnicities(usually asian), use stereotypical names, their appearance goals are almost all highly edited people with lots of makeup on(alot of the time its idols). Their accounts for some reason seem to always look “cutesy” or have that try hard aesthetic vibe.

This doesnt mean someone doing some of those things is a fetishizer/bait.

If they use terms RCTA/ECTA or in general show 0 knowledge for about the transrace community, terms, identity and actual struggles, they are most likely a fetishist.

take a took at their content. Take note of now exactly they talk about the race and or ethnicity they are transitioning into. It is extremely easy to tell whether or not a person has done any actual research or if they are just using the identity bc they think said ethnicity “looks attractive”. A stark teller is almost all baits/fetishizers post their previous name and race/ethnicity, usually for attention.

Manys content will revolve around physical appearance and lifestyle on nonrealistic standards. Their goals and desires will be very obvious rooted in media they have seen online and not rooted in an actual want to transition but more “envy” because they perceive said race/ethnicity as “better”(again, mainly based on what the individual consumes online)

most fetishizers I have seen are people who are claiming to be transitioning to Japanese. A common behavior I will see is the romanticism of their culture, denying or overlooking Japans crimes and cultural issues, claiming things come from Japan when they dont and otherwise have that mentality that Japan is “ superior “. ive seen outright claim Chinese and Korean people(img wise) are Japanese as well, showing they think atleast some asians look the same.

They are also usually really fucking mean for some reason lmao?? They have that sweet behavior exterior but on the inside they are some of the most toxic mfers you have EVER met its genuinely scary.

[fuyukisworld]

why is there so little transid art

like why's there no art about what race dysphoria feels like or how society pushed transabled ppl to death

This is such a great question and I feel it’s important to point out how shunned we are as a community. Most art I see is from smaller creator here on Tumblr and it stays underground, I usually only see art when it comes to like transid pride month.

 I think a lot of radqueer artists may just not want to deal with the potential backlash they could receive from posting art of that sort. Our community is very much harassed, our post get shared and negative lights, we have people in our community getting doxxed and sent disgusting messages.

I know that if a piece of art that depicted those things and more darker struggles that we go through got popular enough, the artist would 100% the mass harassed by antis.

While I think the creation of art is very important and good for voicing our struggles, I also don’t blame artists who don’t want to share their work publicly to avoid that sort of backlash.