In her defense, Steph didn’t mean for this to happen. The whole thing had happened years ago when she was fifteen
It was a solo mission she had went on without anyone knowing while she was still acting as Robin, and the cult had gotten the jump on her
She still blamed the outfit colors for being obtrusive
But now, as she listened to the new cult rattle on about how ‘they shall sacrifice the Robin to summon the all powerful god (which she knew he would take offense to) of Space’ because of some ancient text that said they could only be called upon by ’their Robin’
Cass giggled next to her, leaning against her shoulder and nudging her secretly
Steph was mentally drawing up the divorce papers… for the hundredth time. How dare he call her ‘His’!
As the rest of the bats scurried around like crazy rats, she groaned dramatically, pulling out her phone and angrily punching in the familiar number
It only rang a few times before it connected, all the cave turning to look at her in confusion “yknow what, we’re getting a divorce.”
“What?! What did I do now?!”
“Calling my ‘yours’? Unacceptable. We’re getting a divorce, and I’m taking the blender and Cass.” She huffed, Cass giggling
A scandalized gasp rang across the line, the voice sniffing theatrically “my Wife is divorcing me and taking my girlfriend?! How could you! And you know I love blendy, it makes the best smoothies ever!”
“Your smoothie privileges are revoked! Revoked I say!”
“My love-“ the voice and Steph both held back laughter “please… Ha! I can’t..! What’s going on this time exactly” they spoke through laughter
She couldn’t help it, she laughed to “Bitch, some cult found ancient text that said they could summon you by the call of ‘your Robin’. The dicks kidnapped my brother-not-brother!”
Everyone in the cave could hear the annoyed groan ring out “oh come on! What is with people trying to summon me! I’m an ancient, I make pretty stars and move planets around sometimes! I don’t do wishes or grant powers!”
Steph snorted, leaning against the bat computer “yeah, well they called you a ‘god of Space’. Can you just come deal with this shit, before the entire BatBrood flips shit?”
“Batcave, just rip a portal and I’ll lead the way, Kay?”
“Yeah yeah, but you owe me dinner tonight. I’m having to bail on my study group to deal with this” they complained, and they could hear them rustling around “also, I’m bringing my normal sword, Fright is using the soul shredder tonight”
Steph muttered a quick damn under her breath, focusing back on the previous bit “also, wtf, you ought to take me to dinner for this shit! They kidnapped Robin! And you fucking hate your study group because they use you, don’t act like I ain’t doing you a favor.”
Before the person on the phone could reply, Cass cut in, giggling “both take me out to dinner. Yes?”
They both melted, Steph grinning goofily while the voice sighed like a love sick child “deal” they both said, the call dropping
Batman, because as much as Bruce tried he could never pull off the glare without the cowl, was on her in an instant “Stephanie… who was that.”
She blinked, completely unbothered “my husband.”
The room was quiet enough to head a hair fall, even the actual bats on the ceiling shocked silent. Then they all erupted in chatter
“Husband?! Since when?!” “Damn, thought you were dating Cass.” “How did that even happen?!!?” “Are you married to a god?!” And so many more questions
But of course Bruce’s cut through them all “explain”
Rolling her eyes, she let Cass wrap around her arm and lay her head against her shoulder while she explained
“Remember my brief stint as Robin?” They nodded “well, during that time, I went on a solo mission without Bruce. He was pissed at me, I was pissed at him, so I went off alone.” Jason snorted, muttering under his breath about that being a disaster
“It didn’t go as planned. I ended up encountering a cult and they tried to use me as a sacrifice. Needless to say, it didn’t go as planned. Phantom hadn’t even been named an ancient yet at that point, he was just an average realms being”
“The ritual they used was completely wrong, and instead of marking me as a sacrifice in the ‘oh death’ way, it was ‘church bells and holy matrimony’ way… neither of us were pleased”
Dick gasped, running forward and grabbing her “you were married off to some god?! You were fifteen! Why didn’t you tell anybody?!?”
She shoved him off, scoffing “first off, I did tell someone. Alfred’s known since I came home after that mission. Second, he’s not a god, he’s an ancient, whole different thing. Third, he’s only a year older than me.”
Tim blinked at her, tilting his head “so when we were dating… you were married?”
With a wince, she waved her hands “I mean, at that point we were both still looking for a way to reverse it. We were at most friends at that point. Once me and you broke up, me and him started hanging out more and decided that, hey, maybe being married ain’t so bad” she shrugged
Tim nodded in acceptance, but Jason waved his hand “okay, but what about Cass, you two have both been dating for a while. Is this the same situation?”
Blinking, a grin spread across her face, Cass laughing softly “she’s our affair”
Dick gasped, the others huffing in confusion
“Turns out both of us find her hot, so we agreed that we’d be open to all three dating, but since of whole marriage thing is magical, we can’t just add her to it, so…”
Just then, a green portal clawed through the air, ripping open. Everyone but the two girls stepped back, off put by the neon Lazarus green swirling in front of them
A hand painted in space gripped at the edge, the rest of a body walking through after. The figure was tall, taller than even Jason as they stretched to their full height, skin a dark grayish blue. White hair flowed like it was underwater or moving without gravity
Both arms looked like they were dipped in the cold void of space, hands ending in claws, and when they yawned a maw of fangs greeted them
Their outfits looked a mix of royal and relaxed, galaxy print harem pants tied with a silver ribbon adorned with star and moon charm clung to his waist
A scabbard was clipped to his side
A black long sleeved cropped turtle neck exposed his stomach, softly glowing freckles splattered across his sides, the moon phases painted on his sleeves with a star cut out on the back
White combat boots were embroidered with space imagery using silver thread, and he had all types of silver jewelry, including multiple ear piercings and an eyebrow piercing
Finally he opened eyes, black sclera with bright neon green stars for irises that drew everyone’s gaze
“Alright wifey, lead the way.” A voice identical to the one on the phone came from the supernatural space deity, an unnaturally large grin
Cass wasted no time in running towards him and jumping into his arms, the being smiling softly “hello there my Swan, as much as I’d love to cuddle, I think we have actual work to do”
She nodded, looking to Steph and nodding towards their bikes, the two girls leading him over to their vehicles and climbing on, the man flying after them as they drove off with a call of “KEEP UP!”
After recovering from the shock, every bat and bird was on their tail, and from what Oracle was reporting, the three didn’t seem to be taking this seriously
Actually, they more seemed to be flirting
They arrived a few minutes after they did, and were greeted to the man looking slightly different. Most of him looked the same, but his ears were long and pointed, a billowing cloak of space wrapped around his shoulders and a hood shadowing the top part of his face
Above his head, a halo of familiar planets circled. He was staring down from the rafters with a blank dead gaze, but his talons were shaking from rage
Glancing down they could see why. Damian, with him mask luckily still on, was strapped to a chair with chains
He was in the middle of a summoning circle that no matter how many times they tried, wouldn’t work
But most damning of all, was the cuts, bruised, and bleeding forehead from being brutalized by angry cultists
A smack echoed through the room as the seeming leader slapped Damian across the face, his head falling forward from exhaustion and blood loss
“You stupid bird! You’re supposed to be the key to summoning the god of space! Why won’t you call for him!” They grabbed his face roughly, sneering down
Surprisingly, Damian still had enough energy to spit in the cultists face, even if it was more blood than saliva “because you imbecile, I don’t even know what you’re speaking of! Release me at once!”
Without notice, the deity had made its way down to the ground, looming behind the leader as tendrils of space restrained the rest, the warehouse filled with muffled screams
The leader turned back, having to strain their neck to look up at him. He was taller now, hair longer and floating erratically around him like comets
“You dare try to Summon me by harming an innocent child? I, an ancient of the realms that house the forsaken souls of painful death?! We protect the living! Home the dead! You have insulted me!”
As if he didn’t hear a word said, the cultist grinned, pointing to the shoddily drawn circle under them “silence! You are bound to obey me!”
Phantom tilted his head, leaning forward and looking him straight in the eyes “is that so? And what information tells you such?”
The leader proudly held up a book, showing a page of summoning circles and sigils to draw on it depending on your goals
“Hmm, well, even if you probably drew any of these sigils correctly, which you didn’t” he glared, the cultist going pale “you were not the one to summon me. You hold no authority over me and I have nothing I owe you”
With a flick of his hand, the occult book burned to dust and the scroll flew to his hand. Floating leisurely, he nodded for the bats to extract Robin “allow us to look over this text, shall we? It tells us that I can be summoned by the call of My Robin. That child you have harmed was not my robin, simply a legacy.”
“Second, the scroll has a small… typo, of sorts.” He turned the page around, pointing a claw at the word God “this? Is wrong. I’m no god, I’m an Ancient, we are far above them”
“Think of us as divine landlords, we rent out pieces of our domain to gods we find worthy. Every god in every pantheon has been given their powers by an ancient, because while they work to control the domain, we are the concepts.”
“We don’t grant blessings, or wishes, we delegate our domain to trusted associates, like a company. I believe that’s a way your mortal mind can conceptualize it”
Steph laughed from where she was checking for Robins weapons, Jason tilting his head. Whispering “that’s how his mentors had to explain it to him because he was absolutely clueless about what was happening to him”
They refocused on the interaction between Phantom and the Cultist when the human tried to charge at him with a knife “if you won’t grant me the powers I seek, I shall simply kill you and take them from you!”
He let out a pathetic war cry, and in a flash the knife was sent flying into the wall, Phantom holding a black steel long sword in one hand. The hilt and guard carved with an eclipse and stars
“Tell me Mateo, did you really believe that would work?” He raised a brow, mouth slipping into a sharp grin
Cass theatrically fanned her face, Steph nodding in solidarity, the slightest hint of a blush under her mask
With a final sigh, Phantom stepped forward, footfalls meaningfully echoing. Once right in front of him, he tilted his head to look up at him with the tip of his sword, a bead of blood falling down his neck
“Mateo Louise James, for the insult of attempting summoning an Ancient with the blood of an innocent child, from this day forward all magic you’ve learned shall be unattainable to you. No god shall grant you any power and any ritual you may take part in shall fail. May you live a life of regret and pain”
The tendrils of space brought the rest of the cult together in a small group, turning to them with a cold expression
“Hear me well, if you follow his path, you’ll end up just as he. Be cautious if you wish to continue your life well.” In a flash, he disappeared, reappearing near them in the corner in his previous appearance
Steph jumped up and ran to him, jumping into his arms and kissing his cheek “have I ever told you how hot you are when you’re working?”
Cass nodded, cuddling close to him and peppering him with kisses “very attractive”
A deep purr echoed as he nuzzled them “I don’t deserve you girls, you still up for dinner?”
They nodded, but before they could get far, Batman approached him and glared “Spoiler, explain.”
Groaning, she rolled her eyes “can we at least head back to the cave so Robin can be looked at and we can get out of our suits?”
“Not with an unknown. Our identity’s are not to be trusted to a possible threat” the Bats voice was a forced growl, but Phantom tilted his head curiously
Holding up his phone to show a text chain, he frowned “but Alfred is already expecting me to stop by… he got me some star candy” somehow the otherworldly creature was pulling a very convincing imitation of a puppy
“Oh come on B, he’s known me and Cass’s identity since we were married, Alfred has already vetted him and made sure he wasn’t a threat”
Jason chuckled, “oh I’ve got to see this, if you fight Alfred, hell will rain down”
Everyone felt a shiver go down their spines, Batman ultimately sighing and pinching between his brows “fine. But you will be giving me a highly detailed report later, am I understood”
Phantom floated forward, shyly holding out his hand “if it helps at all… here’s every bit of research on realm beings, including my unique biology. I’ve been keeping a record since I was fourteen.”
That actually seemed to do a lot, Batman taking the offered USB and tucking it into his utility belt with a approving grunt
Smiling, he startled when Black Bat grabbed him and pulled him out to her bike, pointing at it and telling him to get on
He nodded, getting on and grinning when Cass got on behind him and hugged him
“I call cuddling him in bed tonight!” Steph called out, gunning it and taking off towards the cave, Phantom and Cass not far behind, laughter trailing in their wake
Back at the cave, Phantom was lounging in the air, lazily drifting around and looking at every little detail the cave had to offer
Steph walked out in her casual clothes, waving for him to come down. The Ancient complained, wrapping his arms around her shoulders from behind “yknow, I’ve missed you too a lot. I’m sorry I’ve been so busy lately”
She shrugged “you have college, I get it. You know you can change back to your normal form if you want.”
His eyes flicked towards Batman on the Batcomputer, seemingly scanning through the expansive data of ghosts “you sure he’s not gonna kill me the second I do?”
Red hood, now sans the hood, barked a laugh “B wouldn’t kill somebody if it was the last resort, trust me” the words were bitter, Batman flinching and almost unnoticeably closed in on himself
So with a deep sigh, he stepped back and let stardust wash over him and take his ghost form with it. He was left looking completely human, tanned skin, freckles that no longer glowed, and inky black hair that was mused up and fluffy
His once regal clothes were replaced by a light blue tee shirt and black jacket with a custom nasa logo on the back, a pair of ripped jeans
He had two rings on a necklace chain, a pair of simple black star stud earrings and the eyebrow piercing. All together he looked like the exact definition of college student
Everyone was left in various states of shock as the man stretched “So… I’m Danny. Nice to meet you.”
The cave wasn’t quiet for the rest of the night…