Fuck Off Up The Model Village

Stanislas | 26 | Belgium | I love you 3000 | let there be light | Goth Simon Pegg is my aesthetic | I make shitty edits 'cause I'm about that life | Team Stark till the day I die | He's got the voice of an angel | Long live the mutant race

[angelsdean]

crazy to me when ppl forget cas is Literally a jock. he has led multiple armies (teams) and he's mr. battle strategy (gameplays). he is thee quarterback. he is ruthless on the (battle)field. and every angel is obsessed with him either in a fangirl way or seething with jealousy. or they straight up fear him and fight flight fawn in his presence. thee only person who sees him as uwu soft dorky angel nerd is DEAN bc dean has pink heart-shaped glasses on at all times around him. and even then, he knows he's a badass soft dorky angel nerd.

[garyfuckingking]

Which means Dean will never know the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of Heaven football

[sparrtington]

FURIOUSLY SHAKES THE SCREEN OH HOW I MISS MY DECEASED WIFE

[whump-is-love-whump-is-life]

He’s so pretty… I want him to be grievously injured

[chicks]

[hechizero-emplumado]

Pequeño 🐍

[dollefront-deactivated20250908]

[kosmogrl]

[neometalpussy]

i don't know man, i just wish that we could [suddenly realising i'm coming dangerously close to expressing a real and earnest thought instead of filtering everything through several layers of intangible running bits] blow up the entire world. or something.

[ow-my-skin]

Glasses people love to make you try their glasses on to see how fucked up their eyes are. It's a sign of respect in their culture.

[vivienvalentino]

THOMAS GIBSON Far and Away, 1992

[mousidy]

talking to people while holding a beverage is awesome because you don't have to know what to do with your hands and when you don't know what to do with your face you can just take a sip

[geeneelee]

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

[tonyloki]

[icyxmischief]

Omfg. 

[finalgirlabigailhobbs]

“oh one time my—” (abruptly stops myself from saying the words “tumblr mutual” in public) “overseas colleague”

[ghostly-lee]

:3

[what-even-is-thiss]

You know the Grimm version of Snow White makes more sense than most versions if only because in that version Snow White was like 7 years old.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Like imagine you find a 7 year old in the woods and she’s like my mom is gonna kill me because I’m prettier than her and she’s not kidding. You know this queen is that sort of person. So you and your roommates adopt the kid and tell her don’t talk to strangers. And she keeps talking to strangers and getting poison combs stuck in her hair and whatnot.

Like yeah that’s kinda stupid but also she’s seven. She likes apples.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Also imagine it from the hunter’s perspective. The queen tells you this bitch is prettier than me I need you to take her out in the woods and kill her. And then you see who you’re supposed to kill and it’s a 2nd grader. Like how are you supposed to react to that sort of situation? Kill a human child? No. Because you’re not a brainless evil minion you’re just some guy dealing with a cartoonishly evil monarch. Of course you let her go.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Bad look for the Prince of course. Even if she did age while she was in that glass case. He saw a dead woman and just decided to keep her. And once she stopped being dead he was like we’re married now

He did cause the evil queen to dance to death in red hot shoes though. That was kinda cool.

[thedupshadove]

With the acknowledgement that I'm grasping at straws, is it ever directly confirmed that the Prince wasn't also 7?

[thedupshadove]

See, I think that still works.

You are the guardsman assigned to protect the eight-year-old Prince. You are currently in the middle of the forest because he absolutely had his heart set on "going hunting", and the royal second-grader should definitely not be traipsing around the woods on his own. You let him go a little on ahead and he comes running back talking about how there's a dead girl in the clearing and there's no-one else around and he wants to take her home because she's really pretty, Hans, and she's all alone!

You let him drag you to said clearing and okay, that is one angelic-looking dead child alright, and on the one hand the quality of her clothes and the craftsmanship on the coffin (who builds a see-through coffin?) speak to potential Consequences if you simply carry her off, but also for the amount of vines that have grown on the coffin she looks extraordinarily un-decayed, so you should probably get the court alchemist's opinion on that, and there's no way he's going to come all the way out here in his embroidered velvet curly-shoes. And also this kid is technically assigned by God as your natural superior, or something.

So fine. You hoist the coffin onto your shoulder (it's not like the Prince can do it. He's eight.) and head back toward the castle, Prince chattering blithely all the way. And then you turn your ankle on a rock and suddenly there's a thump and a cough and a lot of shouting from inside the coffin and you have now become a key player in a tense political incident with the next kingdom over.

You should probably ask for a raise.

[bitchesgetriches]

We are in favor of just about any fairy tale ending with "you should probably ask for a raise."

[jackalgirl]

Seconded

[marzipanandminutiae]

(the original does specify that she was in the coffin "a long, long time," and they are presumably both adults by the time the prince finds her. but this version is way funnier)

[im-sebastian-stan-deactivated20]

Zemo: I've thought about nothing else for over a year. I studied you. I followed you. But now that you're standing here, I just realised there's a bit of green in the blue of your eyes. How nice to find a flaw!

@giftober 2023 and @mcuchallenge| Day #4:"Eyes".