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underrated funny element of Lord of the Rings is that the prophecy about how “no man” shall kill the Witch-King, foreseen and spoken by a mighty elf-lord of old…is from Glorfindel. You know, our buddy Glorfindel, from Rivendell? Who picked the hobbits & Aragorn up for the last few miles to the valley, pursued by the Ringwraiths? Which he did because he is, yes, a mighty-elf-lord of old—but his primary and in fact only role in the story is as basically a high-stakes emergency uber guy. Also, when I say “mighty elf-lord of old”, I DO mean he’s a hero of the First Age, a lord of Gondolin ere its fall, famed for slaying a Balrog to safeguard the retreat from that grand city, now reborn & returned to Middle Earth to help fight evil…and he gave that prophecy about the Witch-King in like the mid-Third Age just ~2,000 years ago, like 5,000 years AFTER his epic Balrog duel. For the Men, this is a Huge Thing of Yore; for Glorfindel, it was, like, not just another Tuesday, but maybe a serious Saturday; and also he’s still here, just ubering lost hobbits.

faramirsonofgondor

AU where Boromir survives but literally nothing changes because they all think he’s dead and he’s still recovering and by the time he’s actually okay again everything important is already over. Like lowkey imagine how fucking funny it would be if during the one scene where Frodo wakes up after destroying the ring and everyone is coming in, Boromir just walks in nervously and Frodo, who is trying to distract from the fact that he very clearly does not know Legolas’ name, pretends to pass out. Everyone is just like “oh dear!”, Sam goes into overprotective mode (“I told you it was a bad idea Mr. Gandalf!”) Aragorn is trying to reassure Boromir that it’s not his fault and that everything will be fine, Merry and Pippin are trying to comfort each other, Gimli and Legolas are just standing awkwardly in the corner because they know nothing about hobbit biology and what normal reactions are for this sort of thing. Gandalf is the only one who knows Frodo is faking it but he says nothing because Gandalf loves drama and being a bitch. Eventually they’re all ushered out to give Frodo more rest, except for Gandalf, who insists on staying to watch over him. After everyone is gone Gandalf tells him he can open eyes, and the first question out of Frodo’s mouth is very much not about Boromir’s miraculous return, or the state of the world, or about what happens to him now, but rather “Gandalf, what the fuck is the elf’s name?”

idontknowhowtoplayguitar

Lotr headcanon, having lots of patches on your clothes is fashionable in the Shire. The more patches, the cooler you are. Especially if it's a lot of different fabrics. It's common to trade patches with friends and family, and it's usually treated with high sentimental value. It's like carrying a piece of someone with you.

While the hobbits are on the quest, their clothes get holes and such. This leads Sam and Frodo to nab small things from the other members of the fellowship, like handkerchiefs or anything too worn for use, to use as patches. Merry and Pippin aren't so courteous, and cut pieces from the fellowship's clothes while they sleep.

Of course, the hobbits exchange patches amongst themselves while traveling, and they never go anywhere without a needle and some thread. Sam is the best at sewing. Pippin is not allowed around needles.

Boromir notices this, thinks it's adorable, and leaves things out purposely for the hobbits to use. Eventually, he asks about it, and they convince him to do the patches, too.

Aragorn also notices and thinks it's adorable, but doesn't bring it up to them. He's secretly flattered to find pieces of his rag on Frodo's pants. He asks Boromir about it instead.

Legolas doesn't notice. His clothes are elven-made, and the scissors refuse to cut it.

Gimli notices the random holes in his clothes, and the things going missing, but doesn't realize it's the hobbits. He brings it up to Legolas, who immediately convinces Gimli that he's crazy and it's all in his head.

Gandalf notices, obviously, and he doesn't mind until Pippin tries to cut his cloak while hes asleep. He proceeds to wake up and yell at him until dawn.

After Boromir dies, Aragorn takes his cloak, and sews pieces onto his clothes. These are the only patches he has.

Bilbo has a set of clothes with patches from the dwarves, from his own adventure. He told them about the tradition, and they all gave him pieces of fabric to use. He can still recount which patch belonged to who.

cuntlijah

Aragorn n Legolas r so funny to me bc people who don’t know lotr well see gruff manly ranger and elegant princely elf but they don’t know what i know. they don’t know that Aragorn is the long haired sensitive softboy writing sad poetry on his livejournal about not being able to show his girlfriend the awesome new song he wrote for her on his guitar meanwhile Legolas is doing backwards kickflips over gimli at the skate park bc gimli double dog dared him then he and gimli climb the tree at Aragorn’s house n yell at him through the window to come play halo

mistandshcdow

lotr behind the scenes

camille-lachenille

Imagine just how popular the members of the Fellowship would be in Gondor and Rohan after the War of the Ring. They’re the heroes who saved the world, and the common folks look up at them in awe.

A few years after the end of the war, Legolas is visiting Minas Tirith when he hears a woman call his name. He turns around, surprised, only to see this stranger calling after a toddler running away from her. “Legolas, come back to mama!” she calls, over and over. There’s a baby on her hip who start crying, and she gently shushes her little Pippin. Legolas walks away, feeling wistful and wondering.

In Rohan, Éomer hears one of his men proudly announce the birth of his first child, a little boy named Merry; he smiles and congratulates the young father, making a mental note to write to Merry Brandybuck.

Gimli becomes a very popular name for little girls in Gondor, and this sends Aragorn and Legolas into hysterical fits of laughter. Gimli is unbearably proud of this fact.

Samwise and Frodo, too, become popular children names, no matter the gender, and especially amongst lower class folks. When Sam hears of the news, he turns red and sputtering.

Two decades or so after the war, Faramir almost has a heart attack when one of the new recruits of the guard of Ithilien almost sheepishly introduces himself as Boromir.

sahorocoopr

paradoxial-cunt

bog-goblin

i-am-a-fish

eldamaranquendi

Legendarium by Pete Amachree

Oromë leading his forces during The War of Wrath

Beleg is presented with the sword, Anglachel

Númenórean shrine to Yavanna, before the arrival of Sauron

Húrin's last stand at Nírnaeth Arnoediad

Melian the Maia and her daughter Lúthien, in the throne room of Menegroth

Húrin finds the Nauglamír, in the ruins of Nargothrond

Luthien sends the court of Morgoth to sleep with a song of enchantment

Fingolfin challenges Morgoth at the Gates of Angband

City of the Gondolindrim

Gondolin: The House of the Golden Flower

Daeron at the court of Menegroth

Assault on Nargothrond

Ruins of Doriath

Beren and Luthien flee Angband

Two Valaraukar, or Balrogs at Nírnaeth Arnoediad

Húrin returns to Morwen

Fëanor's last stand at Dagor-nuin-Giliath

The Catacombs of Menegroth

The Halls of Mandos

Númenórean shrine to Yavanna Kementari

Melkor and Sauron

happyheidi

𝑎 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑚 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑦, 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟 <3

x - x / x - x / x - x 🍃

evilwizard

the gimmick blogs are like tumblr’s rogue gallery. yes we’ve got some heroes, yes we’ve got some villains, but more importantly if you look over here you will see some freak who devotes all their time to counting the number of “t’s” in a post