I like Ken. The Barbie movie got me to write again. This is a side-blog. Aroace | 35 | she/her but in a Weird Barbie way. In a Crowley way. In a little frog in a bog way | I do not give permission to repost my works anywhere (reblogs are welcome)
Yee-howdy, I'm Gender Kenvy. Based on the name, you can safely assume my specialty is the Barbie movie and my main squeeze (blorbo? is that what the youths call it these days?) is Ryan Gosling's Ken.
I'm ace and probably aro, too, so I tend to explore that a lot in my writing. My pronouns are *exaggerated shrugging*
I am 35 and rediscovering my love of storytelling after a long drought in writing. (Sorry! I am an internet elder and very, very not hip with the times. But Margot Robbie and I are the same age and that's kinda cool.)
I mostly publish over on Ao3 but have cross-posted a couple of things here.
Quick links:
Just a Girls' Doll in a Man's World
[the one that got me writing again <3 ]
Ao3 Link
Summary: Ken is called to the Real World through a portal to his very own human, except that the problem they're facing is one he caused, himself. Now he's taking classes, trying to learn how to be better and mend the rift. It just so happens he's taking some of the same courses that Barbie is. They figure out how a doll and a human with a half-century relationship behind them can help each other grow as people.
Summary: Barbara Handler finds an abandoned doll on a park bench - except he's not a doll anymore. Ken is homeless, but doesn't seem to mind. As time passes, it's clear that he's hiding something: he keeps going missing, only to pop up again acting strangely, can't hold down a job, and won't stick around in the same place for very long. Barbie is determined to figure him out so he can finally have the life always denied to him as a doll. But he has to let her help him.
Rating: T
Length: 175k words
Status: In Progress
"Sometimes they don't come home at all"
Tumblr Post
Summary: Ken comes to the real world, but somehow ends up in the 60's and immediately gets drafted to 'Nam. Barbie & co. reel him back to the present, but he's withdrawn, shell-shocked, and practically mute. They piece together the past he isn't telling them, the life he'd built for himself and lost. Based on a dream. Rough draft/outline. Heavy themes.
Rating: T
Length: 3,538 words, one-shot
Status: Complete!
Duckling
Ao3 Link
Summary: The Ken x El Esposo de Gloria fic you didn't know you needed. Processing a divorce because his best friend is happier with Barbie, Owen is left treading water, lost. He's happy for them, truly. No hate. But who even is he, anymore? Thankfully, ducklings float - and one is heading right for him.
Rating: M
Length: 70k words
Status: In Progress
One stop one-shot shop
Ascension | Ao3 | Tumblr | PG-13 | 1.8 k words | Crack fic/Absurdism. Gloria and Aaron are sent to Barbieland after it was cut off from the real world.
The Piece Fits Perfectly (It's From the Wrong Puzzle) | Ao3 | Tumblr | PG-13 | 1.7k words | Kensposo. Prompt: if Sasha was 10 years younger.
worn and useless thin | Ao3 | PG-13 | 7.1k words | Zombie AU. Barbie's only hope for her family is a man with no hope left.
defanged | Ao3 | Tumblr | Teen | 2.3k words | QPR Barbie/Ken. [Divergence from I Could Be Honest, I Could be Human] What if Someone Else found out about Ken?
doomed (gently) | Ao3 | Tumblr | G | 546 words | Kensposo (Liam x Ken #1) | Liam's peace was already broken before an unexpected visitor appeared on his doorstep.
hang the moon in the sky | Ao3 | Tumblr | Teen | 800 words | Kensposo (Liam x Ken #2) | Liam's house guest is experiencing a lot of firsts right now -- luckily he's actually the perfect person to walk him through it.
Ex-mas | Ao3 | Tumblr | Teen | 5k words | Kensposo (Liam x Ken #3) | Liam must navigate the holidays as his divided family comes to visit. At least he has Ken...for better or for worse.
Will you be mine? | Ao3 | Tumblr | Teen | 1.4k words | Kensposo (Liam x Ken #4) | It's Valentine's Day for Liam and Ken...but they're still figuring themselves out.
hand in hand | Ao3 | Tumblr | G | 1.7k words | Kensposo (Liam x Ken #5) | Prompt: Weddings (and Funerals) | Liam wasn't living until Ken came into his life.
I hope it brings you bliss | Ao3 | Teen | 6.2k words | Elphaba & Fiyero | Fiyero's "appreciation" of poppies has him in a downward spiral disguised as bliss.
Various Prompts & Blurbs!
Right here on Tumblr!
Note to self: also add goose groupie challenge fics in here!
Taking recommendations for particular translations of the Iliad and Odyssey. I didn't realize this one I picked up used the Roman names for the gods and it's pissing me off so much I might just dnf after 4 pages.
I have two equal and conflicting headcanons for Ken when it comes to the rollerblades. Bc he brings them everywhere he goes, so you'd think it's something he does extremely often and is so so so good at (but never as good as Barbie obviously)
But having been reminded of that interview where RG didn't practice at all before the scene and was just terrible at it... It really would fit that Ken brings them everywhere he goes and can't even fucking skate
It's commonly accepted in this fandom that humans have extremely fragile bodies in comparison to Eridians, but I think that's actually an oversimplification.
Because while Eridians are incredibly strong and tough on the outside, on the inside they are actually quite fragile:
They have no immune system, so anything that makes it past their enclosed carapace and internal heating will pretty much kill them
They have no natural defenses to radiation of any kind
In general they have very little organic matter so anything that targets their cells directly is quickly lethal
They are partially cold-blooded and live at a very narrow temperature range (about 20 degrees C)
They rely almost entirely on one, highly developed sense and are helpless if deafened (can't even remember the layout of a room)
They are completely helpless while asleep and can't control when that happens
They will forcibly become dormant after eating AND when badly hurt enough (their equivalent of going into shock)
They require more energy to function than humans do, and have very little organic matter to burn in the case of starvation
In contrast, humans:
Have an aggressive immune system and internal mechanisms for dealing with cell damage
Have adrenaline which allows them to temporarily ignore injuries and perform abnormal feats of strength
Are persistence hunters built for economy of movement and capable of extreme levels of endurance
Exist in a very wide range of habitats and on a diverse diet
Are very hardy in general, able to survive massive injuries, lack of sleep, prolonged starvation, and intense environmental conditions if given proper care
The quintessential example of this dichotomy between strength and endurance is the Going Fishing incident in the book: Rocky is able to survive and move in G forces that are killing Grace and to physically wrestle off the chair crushing him, but he collapses from his injuries almost immediately after. Despite being injured himself Grace then carries his 400lb friend up a ladder, is badly burned returning him to his atmosphere, and then proceeds to get some basic medical care, hype himself up on pain meds and keep working (albeit rather badly, lol) while Rocky forcibly sleeps.
The TL:DR is that Eridians are harder to damage, but easier to kill. They're like an rpg character with high armor and low health. I think Rocky would consider Grace to be very delicate at first, only to be blown away by how deceptively tough his friend can be.
This week's Saturday Night Coffee actually caffeinated me tonight. This was unexpected. Cue me not being able to shut the hell up talking to my friend bc I had nowhere to put that energy, and her being completely supportive the entire time.
Y'all, get you friends you can have the zoomies around.
Grace sort of toying with the idea of being an uncle to Rocky & Adrian's kids; they've missed so much time together, they're bound to want to move on in their relationship soon, right?
But the years start coming and they don't stop coming, and they haven't had kids yet. If the idea is ever passed around, it's never in a committed way, just a "some day when it happens".
Eventually he asks Adrian about it. They tell him they eventually do want children, and want to give them all the attention they deserve; but doing so would take them away from Grace. They have him for such a short while, they want to have as much time with him as possible.
The profundity of their devotion is staggering. They're putting their lives on hold for him. ("You are a part of our lives, nothing is on hold.") They're putting their family on hold for him. ("You are our family.") Grace doesn't know whether to be grateful or guilty.
And then Rocky with the chair: "Having you here is basically like raising a child anyway. Consider yourself the practice-baby."
"Oh my god I'm the chicken egg project for health class."