Yikes

Ftm, 20

[redstonedust]

thinking "everyone can tell im bad at this" as i stand completely motionless doing nothing in public

[enigmaticpink]

I firmly believe what ever you’re obsessed with at 11/12 years old becomes a core part of who you are, regardless if you lose interest in it or not. Maybe some of you were lucky and were obsessed with warrior cats or smth, and if you’re real unlucky it was probably twilight.

[anchovy]

This is what posting your artwork after a mutual posts a big life update feels like

[fakesleepwalking]

phone in bed can range from comforting to mundane but phone in parked car will have you feeling like you've never done anything right in your entire life

[electronicmail]

btw with email u dont have to lick the envelope. i know a lot of people have been doing that and its fine and all but you dont acrtually have to do that with email.

[creekfiend]

I'm so glad that that truncated fucking ran-into-a-wall-at-speed tadpole-ass looking squirrel only lives in high altitude forests in Borneo bc this means I am extremely unlikely to encounter one in my day to day life. thank god

[tuftedpygmysquirrel]

Hello.

[creekfiend]

DID YOU MAKE THIS BLOG SIMPLY TO TORMENT ME

[tuftedpygmysquirrel]

I can go upside down.

[creekfiend]

WHERE IS THE REST OF YOU

[asmrgaret]

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

[asmrgaret]

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

[godlessondheimite]

it’s crazy to me how ice water is a uniquely american phenomenon. it’s the greatest drink in the entire world. how have other countries not hopped on board? genuinely don’t understand how sparkling water is ubiquitous in a way that simple ice water isn’t. whenever i ask for ice water outside the u.s., they put 2 ice cubes in a glass, and i’m always too ashamed of being american to ask for more. but it’s our single healthy habit! luckily i am always prepared (half gallon insulated water bottle that i fill with ice myself and then fill with water and always carry around with me) but it really is baffling every time i travel.

[wo-control]

might fuck around and haunt your dreams for a bit

[sacred-portal]

[flipchild]

puppy cut flan 🍮🔪

[flipchild]

incredible puppy cut the flan technique

[flipchild]

badass flan slice performed by small type dogy

[digitalhunk]

[energyprison]

every political scandal has to be called ____gate now because 54 years ago a guy named blowjob told reporters there were bugs in the democrat offices

[dykecinema]

[frontmansdefender]

[gnar-slabdash]

Oh good, now I have a cheat sheet for Uncensored Nate

[teaboot]

I’ve narrowed it down to these three top reasons OP should be allowed to commit arson

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

Walking around with this sheet in hand and pointedly taking it out and methodically searching through it every time I want to say something

[recoiloperated]

This is killing me.

[blockiestone82]

Excuse me, sir, has to be my favorite of the list

[jetix]

2026-01-12

[kevinokevinokevino-deactivated2]

[han-the-human]

People who are like "I don't understand your identity so I won't respect it" perplex me

Like bro I don't understand how my toilet flushes but I don't leave shit in the bowl