Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
DM or send an ask to be on the taglist!
DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
Olivia felt like the air was vacuumed from her lungs. Every muscle in her body went stiff. “Who is this?” she demanded.
The man on the line laughed. “Oh, shit! Is that Detective Benson?” He spoke like they were old friends, adding to their infuriation. “Wait, no. Lieutenant Benson. That’s right, it’s been a while since we last spoke. You really climbed those ranks, didn’t you?”
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Monday, October 31st, 7:15PM
Valeria was fifteen minutes early. She thought the traffic would be worse getting back. Would showing up at his door now make her look too eager? Should she wait at her apartment and be fifteen minutes late, or would that make her seem disregarding? If she was on time, it might make it seem like she was too coordinated for this.
At the end of it, she decided she was overthinking it, as she usually did, and went into her apartment to try to mask the stress of the day before heading to Rafael’s. And if Isabella was back home, give her a piece of her mind. But she wasn’t, and that gave Valeria the chance to put on her best cool demeanor while she changed into cleaner, more casual clothes. This was her first real date in over a decade. Rationality said there would be no date if Rafael didn’t already see something in her, but realism reminded her that he didn’t see it all. He saw what Valeria showed him, what she deemed safe to be seen. And it wasn’t much…
Valeria finished off her refresh with dry shampoo, her leather jacket in place of her blazer and jeans in place of slacks. She wasn’t a fan of the “professional” attire rule Liv had in place, but she also wasn’t in a place to question it or fight it. It really wasn’t a huge deal at the end of the day. What was a huge deal, was this first date. She’d almost forgotten it was her birthday until she walked into Rafael’s apartment and smelled the fresh meal he’d prepared.
Rafael poked his head from the kitchen, his smile the brightest thing in the room when he saw Valeria setting her bag next to the door. “Well, shit. You actually came,” he teased.
“Okay, well, if you’re gonna be an ass right off the bat, I can just go and have dinner with Liv and Noah.” She picked up her bag again.
Rafael laughed, setting the food to warm as he went to greet Val at the door with a glass of wine. “Put the bag down, and leave your attitude with it.” He placed a glass in one hand and took the purse from the other. “Leonetti Merlot, 2015.”
She hummed, taking a quick sniff before a sip. “Sounds expensive.”
He raised a brow. “And if it was?”
“I’d complain. A lot.”
“So, what I’m hearing is, never let you find gift receipts,” he summarized. “Thanks for the heads up.” Rafael chuckled as she rolled her eyes and brushed past him, watching her walk toward the kitchen. She moved more gracefully when she wasn’t drunk. Straighter, stronger. It formed a familiar knot in his lower belly. One that he had to actively remind himself to ignore, to not act upon. At least for now. “Arroz con gandules y lechón,” he explained the smell, following her into the kitchen. “Pasteles are still heating up in the pot.”
Valeria’s eyes widened as she looked back at him, her chest feeling warm as the swarm of butterflies got feistier in her belly. “You actually took the time to make pasteles?” That expectation wasn’t even close to being on her mind. At least not this soon into their… whatever they were doing.
Rafael walked past her with a guilty expression, grabbing the wine to top off her already almost empty glass. “For the sake of keeping you impressed and not tarnishing my reputation as an overachiever, we’ll say yes.” Store bought, but still quality made, in his opinion. He would have made them himself if he had the time, but he truthfully hadn’t expected her to accept his invitation to dinner, let alone agree to a relationship with him. He seemed confident on the outside, but honestly? He was freaking out just as much as she was. All of this was almost brand new, and he didn’t want to ruin it.
Valeria chuckled. “Trust me, your effort at all is impressive enough,” she assured, leaning back against the counter. Her stance changed, shoulders shrugging up as if she was trying to hide. She was timid, glancing down into the glass. “You really want to give this a shot, huh?” God fuck— Why did she ask? Why couldn’t she just let it be? Was it really that unbelievable that she could have something good?
It honestly almost broke Rafael’s heart that she had such a hard time accepting that she was worth the effort, but he understood how that doubt came to be. “I do,” he confirmed. “I don’t have a clue what I’m doing, but I’m willing to figure it out as I go, if you’re willing to be patient with me.”
Her smile grew gently. “I’m raising a teenager,” she reminded jokingly. “My patience isn’t a problem, it’s my sanity.”
“I’m guessing Isa finally got back to you?” He sipped his wine before setting it down to tend to the food being prepared.
“Nope, but we traced her phone. She’s at her crush’s house.” She fully expected the concerned looked Rafael gave her, sharing the same sentiment. “I know, but I also know Isa. She’s not gonna do anything stupid. Er… Well… Not anything stupider than what she’s already done.”
“As long as you’re sure,” Rafael encouraged, pulling open a cabinet for plates.
Valeria watched as he plated and served their dinner. How the fabric of his polo moved with his muscles, fitted to his contours. His grip tightening on the plate as it started to weigh heavier when more food filled it. And when he walked to the table… Lord, save Val from these sinful thoughts. Or don’t. “Fucking wild,” she thought out loud, biting her lip.
He glanced back, setting the plates down. “What is?”
“Hm?”
He noticed her eyes cast up to his from his hip region, grinning slowly. “You said ‘fucking wild’. What’s fucking wild?”
She shook her head, sipping her wine. “How when we first met, I wanted nothing more than to beat your ass,” she indulged, grabbing his glass and bringing it to the table. “You were just… so fucking arrogant and snide, walking around like you owned shit just because you’re good in the courtroom.”
“You know, when you talk like that, I get the feeling you still hate me,” he chuckled. Although, it was a very real concern he had, but tried to bury.
“I never hated you,” she admitted. “You just frustrated me. Still do, but for different reasons.”
Curious. “And what are those reasons?”
Valeria finished her second glass, setting it empty on the table before turning toward Rafael. One hand propped against the table while the other rest on her hip. “You’re still arrogant and a pain in my ass,” she said, though voice held a… certain undertone. Her eyes wandered over the features of his face. The hints of silver in his hair and beard, the tired lines from years of fighting in court. Seasoned, but refined. She inhaled a subtly shaky breath in an attempt to settle herself, her hand lifting from the table to straighten the collar of his polo. “But now it adds to your charm. I don’t want to fight you as much as I would rather…” A pause. Valeria bit her lip with a sultry grin. “Something else that starts with an ‘f’.” A quick little tug at his collar undid the loose top button. She left him with that, grabbing her glass as she went back to the kitchen to refill it.
Jesus fucking Christ. Valeria made it harder and harder for him to keep his hands to himself. No matter how much he tried to tell himself to keep it together, his body did the opposite, following her into the kitchen. He stood directly behind her, smirking when her breath hitched at his hands on her hips. “Are you trying to seduce me, Detective?” he asked quietly, lips brushing against her ear.
Valeria tried to keep her composure, but her hair standing on end gave her away. “Depends.” She leaned back against his chest, turning her face slightly toward his. “Is it working?”
She gasped in surprise when he squeezed her hips and turned her, backing her against the counter. The involuntary moan as he pressed his hips against hers deepened a blush on her cheeks. “You tell me,” he breathed, eyes staring hungrily into hers.
Restraint broken, Rafael gave into temptation, claiming Valeria’s lips with his own. Hardly a risk when she so eagerly returned the kiss, her arms wrapping around his neck, hands pushing through his hair. It was the same intensity as the first time, but they forced themselves to take their time, savor the feeling of each other under their hands, explore each other’s bodies, taste each other. No touch was a bad one, lighting every nerve on fire.
Dinner was long forgotten. The only thing on their mind was lust as they stumbled out of the kitchen and into the living room. “You know, I have a rule about not putting out of the first date,” Rafael teased through kisses, pushing Valeria’s leather jacket off her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor.
Valeria chuckled, pulling the bottom of his shirt from the waistband of his slacks. “Well , excuse me, Princess,” she teased back, kicking off her shoes. “Should I stop?” The backs of her knees hit the arm of the couch and she let out a soft yelp as she toppled onto her back. She stared up at him, warmth pooling in her lower belly and between her legs in response to how he looked at her.
“Don’t you fucking dare.” Rafael pounced, laying himself atop Valeria, his hips settled between her legs. He was desperate for friction, grinding the strain in his pants against her, drawing a vulgar moan from deep in his chest as their kisses grew pornographic. This was not in the plan for tonight, but there was no way either of them would stop.
But perhaps they spoke too soon. Valeria’s phone started to ring in her purse, eliciting an irritated groan from her. “Déjalo,” Rafael begged, his lips trailing down her neck.
“No puedo,” she panted, despite her wanting to. His hands tearing off her clothes and his mouth on her skin begged her not to stop. “¿Y si es Olivia?”
“Puedes llamarla más tarde. Puedes culparme.” As enticement, he slipped his hand down the front of her panties, coating his middle and ring finger in her wet before pushing them inside her. “Por favor.”
His fingers inside her and his breathless pleading were electric, ripping a gasping moan from her chest. She drowned out her phone ringing long before it stopped, mind stolen into the moment. “Fuck, Rafa,” she whined, hands gripping tight on his shirt and in his hair. The lower he kissed down her body, the heavier her breaths came. She couldn’t help but watch.
Rafael wasn’t lying when he said this wasn’t something he would do on the first date, but he couldn’t help himself this time around. Every snippy remark Valeria made, every glare she cast toward him, the way she carried herself. The longer it went on since May, the more he wanted her. And the more he wanted her, the more he thought had to push it down. Until that past Friday, at least. He really couldn’t stop thinking about her body on his, her tongue in his mouth. He felt guilty, perverted when he imagined how that night would’ve gone if he hadn’t told her to stop. Even more so when he pleasures himself more than once at the thought.
But he intended to make a dream come true now, his hand leaving her core despite her protesting whines and removing the fabric that covered her. He tossed them onto the floor with her jeans and her shirt, marveling at her statuesque body laid open beneath him. “You’re so beautiful,” he praised, his hands gliding gently over her silky legs. He pushed her knees closer to her chest as he leaned down, laying soft kisses to her thighs, alternating as he dipped lower and lower, closer and closer.
Valeria’s head fell back, eyes shut as she reveled in the expert way his tongue danced over her clit. Sexual partners were far and few between, and when they did happen, it was admittedly nothing memorable. She never experienced what it was like to be pleased like this. They never really cared, but even if they had, she was positive nothing would compare to Rafael. Her hips rolled, begging for more, to which Rafael happily obliged by wrapping his lips around her clit. Valeria’s back arched, her moans louder, surely heard by neighbors through the walls.
Music to his ears. She was so much sweeter than he imagined, so much better. He shifted on his knees to adjust the hardness in the front of his pants. His cock twitched and throbbed, begging to be freed from its confines, pleading for pleasure. If only he cared about his own as much as he cared about hers. Or perhaps it was his name falling from her lips with breathless moans that did it for him, that could easily get him off. He released one of her thighs, slipping his fingers into her again to work in tandem.
The knotting core in her belly burned white hot. “Just like that, baby,” Valeria panted. “Fuck, don’t stop. I’m right there. I—“ Her orgasm cut her words short. She clawed at the couch for dear life as she toppled over the edge, shouting Rafael’s name in euphoric bliss.
It took pure willpower and a half to keep himself from cumming, but holy fuck, was it difficult. Her lust flooded, dripping down his chin and hand as he kept working his fingers, helping her ride out her orgasm. Her legs relaxed, Rafael carefully laying them down as he pressed kisses to her hips. “Good girl,” her purred against her skin, grinning as she twitched from each kiss, every nerve in her body ultra sensitive. “Should’ve figured you’d be a screamer.”
Valeria chuckled between heavy breaths, eyes glazed over with lust as she looked down at him. “Get your clothes off and I’ll show you just how loud I can be,” she challenged, pressing the top of her foot against his cock, strained in his slacked.
She didn’t have to tell him twice. He groaned sharply, his hips involuntary grinding down to add more friction as he sat back on his knees, pulling his shirt off in one fluid motion. “Yes, ma’am,” he rumbled.
•••••••••••••••
8:00PM
Fin had forgotten his phone at his desk, grumbling to himself in irritation as he was now forced to get dressed again to go back to grab it. Phoebe was sure to tease the almighty shit out of him when he got back. He passed by Olivia’s office, attention grabbed when he noticed the lights on. He peeked in to find her at her desk. “Hey,” he greeted in surprise. “What are you doing here?”
Olivia looked up from her computer with a grateful sigh, taking off her glasses. “Dodds needed me to double check that Joshua Fletcher case,” she explained. “Said something about it felt off.” She gave a tired laugh at Fin’s offense. “I assured him you did everything right, but he insisted, so I’m just trying to give him a piece of mind.” But it could wait for now. She had her boy at home and she didn’t want to keep Lucy any longer than she needed to. “What about you? I figured you would’ve been in for the night.”
“I was until Phoebe pointed out that I left my phone,” he retorted, a little embarrassed.
Olivia laughed, standing from her desk to follow Fin out to his. “Fin, if you need a day, all you have to do is say so,” she assured. “You’ve been working your ass off, you deserve it.”
He waved a hand as he grabbed his phone. “Nah, I’m alright. You know me, I get antsy if I’m not doing something.” The phone buzzed in his hand, dropping his jaw just slightly when he read the caller ID. “Well, well, well.” He showed Olivia, who shared the same expression when she read the name. Isabella. Fin shook his head. “She’s got another thing coming if she thinks I’m not telling Val.” He and Olivia scoffed before he answered on speaker, Fin mentally praising God that he didn’t have any teen girls to deal with. “Girl, do you have any idea how bad your sister freaked out about you? First you skip your classes, then you don’t return anyone’s calls? Val’s gonna be pissed. You got a death wish or something?”
“Funny you should say that, Detective Tutuola.” The voice that responded was too deep to be Isabella’s. Too old. Too masculine. It wasn’t entirely familiar, but something about it pierced hard, making the detective’s and lieutenant’s blood run cold.
Olivia felt like the air was vacuumed from her lungs. Every muscle in her body went stiff. “Who is this?” she demanded.
The man on the line laughed. “Oh, shit! Is that Detective Benson?” He spoke like they were old friends, adding to their infuriation. “Wait, no. Lieutenant Benson. That’s right, it’s been a while since we last spoke. You really climbed those ranks, didn’t you?”
She in no mood for games, grabbing Fin’s hand that held the phone. “Answer me,” she demanded. “Who is this?”
He sighed. “I guess I wouldn’t be very memorable to you, huh? Val doesn’t really talk about me, does she? Not that I blame her. We had a… rocky relationship. I tried calling her so we could talk it out, but no answer.”
Connor Davis. If hell was real… Every horrible thought ran through Olivia and Fin’s minds. Isabella’s behavior started to make sense. It didn’t seem like her because it wasn’t her. Davis had her, and it was sickening to think of what could’ve happened to her in the last eight hours. “Where’s Isabella, Connor? Let me talk to her,” Olivia pleaded.
“No.” Venom laced his voice. He had nothing to hide anymore. Thanks to Valeria, the world knew what monstrous things he was capable of. If it was a monster they saw, a monster they’d get. “I have a message for my ex, and you’re going to make sure she gets it.”
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: First and foremost, I want to apologize for this chapter being two days late. I have a day job as a hairstylist, and with Thanksgiving being right around the corner, work has slowly been getting busier. On top of that, my creative writing has been lacking. It took me three days since posting Chapter 6 to even start writing Chapter 7, and even when I started, the creative thoughts just weren’t there. But I managed to finish it, and while I worry it’s not up to par with the first half dozen chapters, I hope you all enjoy it anyway.
All this being said, I will be taking a holiday break from writing. I absolutely intend to continue and finish Marked, but for now, I owe it to you all and myself to give you the best writing I have, which means I need to let my mind rest a bit and rejuvenate. The estimated time of my return can be expected on either January 6th, 2023 or January 13th, 2023. Until then, I actually wanna know your thoughts on what I have so far and what you think will happen! In comments, asks, DMs, however you want to make your predictions! This break would also give me a chance to interact with you all like I have really been wanting to.
Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
DM or send an ask to be on the taglist!
DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
“I don’t know what you got in your head, but this is not what we do, Isa,” Valeria hissed into the phone. “This is the first and last time you’re pulling this kinda crap again, you hear me? And we’re having a long ass talk about this when you get home.”
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Monday, October 31st, 11:48AM
Radio silence all weekend, save for a check in text from Isabella every few hours Saturday and Sunday, and a text early that morning saying ‘Happy Birthday’ and letting Valeria know she was off to school. It was all the interaction Valeria had energy for, especially after the events of Friday night.
She wholly wished that she wouldn’t remember it when she crashed back in her apartment. Unfortunately for her, she remembered every little bit of it when she regained consciousness around noon the next morning, and she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since. About Rafael. His body was so warm against hers when they danced, his arms tight and secure around her waist. He was so gentle, until he wasn’t. He became hungry. Ravenous, even, biting and marking her lips and neck, hands clawing at her clothes, grasping at her ass and breasts. The friction of their hips grinding—
“Happy birthday!” Fin unknowingly interrupted Valeria’s intrusive thoughts, placing an open box of donuts right in front of her on the desk. “You still like strawberry with sprinkles, right?”
Bless God. Valeria smiled and laughed, taking a pink frosted donut with pumpkin and bat shaped sprinkles. “I’m genuinely surprised you remember that.” She took a large bite. “It was literally a decade ago you bought me donuts.”
He set the box by the coffee station, taking a jelly filled donut for himself while Carisi helped himself. “I remember because they’re as sweet as you,” he joked with a goofy grin.
“Back it up, smooth talker, or I’ll tell Phoebe you’re flirting with me.”
“Hey, now. No need to threaten my life like that.”
Sonny laughed around his bite of donut as he went to take his seat across from Valeria. “How’re you feeling?” he asked her, pulling open his laptop. “I texted you Saturday morning, but I didn’t hear back.”
“Come on, Carisi, you saw how wasted she was Friday night,” Amanda chimed in jovially from her desk. “You think she was up any time before noon?” Not that Amanda was any better, but she for Ed herself up before noon so she could pick up Billie and Jesse from her mother’s place. Being a mom was a full time job, even with a hangover.
“Listen, I may be Hispanic, but I don’t drink often enough to have a tolerance,” Valeria defended. “I’m just glad I was able to get myself up to my apartment.” After making a visit down the hall, but they didn’t need to know that. Christ, every time there was even the vaguest mention, she was back in his apartment, their hands all over each other.
It made it even harder to forget when Rafael walked into the squad room. He was always cleaned up so nicely, standing so proud. Today, however, he was more modest, his smile softer. He carried with him a small, red gift bag, setting it in front of Valeria. "Happy birthday, Detective Castillo."
Rafael made it known amongst the squad that he wasn't the gift-giving type. He would have a drink and celebrate for a few hours, but that was more or less the extent of it. Save for his mother, of course. ‘A special something for a special someone’, or however that quote went. But which was it? Was Valeria a special someone, as indicated by the gift, or just another detective, as stated by Rafael? And Friday night… They hadn’t talked since, barely seen each other. Valeria lost count of the times she held open their text thread, typing and deleting messages until she ultimately decided it was best to act like it never happened. But now she wasn’t sure if that was the best move. Rafael was smart. There was no way he’d believe that she didn’t remember, especially when she’d been actively avoiding him. Maybe this was his way of an unspoken reconciliation.
Valeria blinked in surprise, looking between Rafael and the bag. “I— This is for me?”
Rafael chuckled. “I am giving it you.” It was the least he could do. There was no bad blood, no feelings of regret. Mostly butterflies, but that was a need-to-know basis. And no one needed to know. Rafael caught the knowing glances exchanged between Fin, Sonny, and Amanda as Valeria hesitantly dug through the tissue-stuffed bag.
Her expression quickly transform from confused and curious to beaming, squealing in delight as she pulled out a hand-carved mortar and a bag of pilones. “You stopped by Javi’s bodega on Clark, didn’t you?” Any embarrassment or reluctance was wiped away and replaced with appreciation.
“I might have recalled you whining about a broken mortar during the move, and more recently a craving for sweets,” he mused proudly, crossing his arms over his chest. He nodded to the bag. “There should be one more thing in there.”
More? What was this about? She reached into the bag again, pushing tissue aside until her hand touched a thin string. Cold. Metal. A chain? Valeria wrapped her fingers around it and pulled, mouth agape when she revealed a silver chain carrying a small blue pendant roughly in the shape of Puerto Rico. “Holy…” She looked up at Rafael with wide eyes. “There’s no way you found this at Javi’s.”
“He had some handmade necklaces made with rough cuts of gemstones.” It was a long shot and a risk of rejection, but when Rafael saw it hanging on a little rack, he couldn’t pass the opportunity to get it. He walked behind her, taking the necklace and unclasping it to put around her neck. “He said it was Larimar, but I’m pretty sure that was just to sell me on it.” Though he would’ve bought it either way, and would absolutely do it again just to see the look of wonder on her face again. He felt relief and, yet again, pride when she accepted the gift, lifting her hair off her neck to let him fasten the clasp. Again, the detectives shared glances, but Rafael didn’t care. All he cared about in the moment was getting a chance to get Valeria alone to talk about what happened the other night…
“Jeez, man,” Fin piped up, pouting. “Why you gotta flex on my donuts?”
Valeria laughed, letting her hair back down. “Don’t worry, Fin, your gift is still my favorite.” She looked at herself, the necklace, in the reflection of her phone screen. She couldn’t stop smiling. “Thank you, Counselor,” she said, looking up at Rafael. “I love it.”
“Love what?” Olivia asked as she finally came into the squad room. “Sorry I’m late, by the way. Noah was having a problem with a classmate and I had to have a sit down with him, his teacher, and the other student and his parents.”
“Need me to fight the kid?” Valeria offered.
Amanda chuckled. “You can’t fight a ten year old, Val.”
“Watch me.”
Olivia scoffed, holding up a hand. “I appreciate the offer, but no. It’s all taken care of.” She noticed the bag and its contents when she got closer, brows raising. “Is this what’s getting all the love? Had I known, I would’ve gotten you something, too.”
Carisi took his seat across from Valeria, giving her and Barba a knowing smile, and Valeria rolled her eyes. “It was as much of a surprise to me as it is to you,” she insisted. “The night at the bar and the donuts were more than enough, but I guess Rafael thought—
Woah, hang on. Rewind. “Rafael? This is from you?”
Rafael rolled his eyes at Olivia in the same manner Valeria did at Carisi. “To make up for Friday night.” He was purposely vague, knowing they’d connect it to his absence at the bar, but he noticed Valeria tense, not making the same connection.
“You didn’t miss anything,” Amanda promised. “Valeria was her same, loud self. Just drunk.”
“Oh, piss off,” Valeria laughed. “You’re just mad I beat you in a drinking game.” She unwrapped one of the pilones, popping it in her mouth and putting the rest back in the bag, along with the mortar. “I’ll be right back, I’m gonna put these in my locker.”
“Hey, let me try one of those sucker things.” Sonny thanked Valeria in Italian, watching her walk off before he turned back to Rafael with a wide grin. “Speaking of suckers,” he mused, unwrapping the candy.
Rafael blinked, taken aback by Sonny’s retort. “Excuse me?” he huffed.
“We’ve worked with you for, what, a little under a decade?” Fin wheeled his chair over next to Carisi. “Out of everyone here, you’re closest with Liv, and I don’t think you’ve ever gotten her a present like you did for Val.”
“And a necklace, at that,” Amanda added.
To which Olivia balked. “A necklace?” She could always do without presents for any occasion. She wasn’t much of a materialistic person anyhow, and she figured Valeria was more or less the same way. To add, she didn’t think Rafael was much of a gift giver. In all the years she knew him, he never came off as thoughtful. That’s not to say he didn’t have a good heart, he was just… a little cold, for lack of better phrasing. “What’s that about, Rafa?”
Rafael smiled, unashamed. “Well, like Detective Carisi has been hinting at, but not that it’s anyone else’s business, I’ll admit I’ve grown fond of Detective Castillo.” That was an understatement. “Where most people would find her abrasive and vulgar attitude to be a turn off, I find it amusing and charming. The Connor Davis case aside, she’s dealt with a lot of other things, and she didn’t let any of it stop her from getting to where she is now, didn’t let it break her down. If that’s not something and someone to admire, I don’t know what is.”
While the sentiment was obvious, the details weren’t until Rafael practically just poured his heart out. He was outspoken, but no one thought like that. “Wow,” Sonny huffed, brows raised. “So, what, you two are a thing now?”
“I don’t think so,” Fin said like he already knew. “I don’t think Val would’ve been all that surprised by the gift otherwise.”
“So, he’s in the process of wooing her,” he deduced. “Is it working?”
What was happening? Rafael found himself just barely able to keep up. “I’m sorry, are you guys putting my love life under investigation now?” The conversation was ridiculous and invasive, but honestly amusing, evident by the grin on his face.
Olivia smirked. “Should it be?”
“Liv!”
Olivia laughed, squeezing Rafael’s bicep. “I’m teasing, Rafa,” she assured. “Whatever happens, I’ll take this as a disclosure of a romantic relationship, if it comes to that.” She started toward her office, gesturing to the rest of her team. “Regardless of that, let’s get to work. Rollins, Carisi, I still need your DD5s from that Joshua Fletcher case.”
“On it, boss,” the two said in unison, switching back to work mode.
Rafael watched as the squad went back to work, but Valeria’s desk remained empty. It was taking a lot longer to put away a little gift bag than it should have. He couldn’t help feeling uneasy, making his way toward the back. He heard her before he saw her, scolding someone in Spanish. When he peeled into the room, he saw her on the phone.
“I don’t know what you got in your head, but this is not what we do, Isa,” Valeria hissed into the phone. “This is the first and last time you’re pulling this kinda crap again, you hear me? And we’re having a long ass talk about this when you get home.” She hung up, tossing the phone back into her locker with a huff and putting the sucker back in her mouth.
Rafael’s brows furrowed deep. Isabella didn’t seem like the type to get herself into trouble. “Hey.” He walked over, leaning against the lockers. “What happened?”
Valeria groaned, slumping back against the lockers. “I’m too young to be dealing with teenage rebellion,” she complained. “Isabella didn’t show up to her fourth period class. I don’t understand, she’s never done this before. She’s always been a good kid.”
He smiled gently. “Even so, I’m sure she just wanted a bit of adventure,” Rafael reasoned. “It’s not unheard of that even the good kids test the waters at one point or another.” His grin turned cocky. “Besides, she is your sister. I wouldn’t be surprised if she takes after you just a little bit.”
Valeria balked with a scoff, playfully shoving Rafael’s chest. “Dick.” She held the sucker in her mouth as she grabbed her phone and closed the locker. “She’s got until the end of the school day to call me back.” She hoped she would. It didn’t occur to Valeria that anything else could be wrong.
Rafael chuckled, swaying back from the shove before standing straight again, a little closer to her now. He could smell the cigarettes she smoked that morning and cherry candy on her breath. “Until then…” He glanced toward the door to assure privacy. A flutter rose in his lower belly, spreading quick as he turned back to Valeria. “Can we talk about what happened Friday night?”
It was a goddamn ambush. Valeria knew better than to trust the candy, but she fell for it anyway. It was worse than alcohol in this case, her inhibitions lowered. Too trusting. All of the embarrassment from that night, the whole weekend, came flooding back, her blushing cheeks visible through her makeup, shaking her head wildly as she avoided eye contact. “Look, Counselor, I’m sorry about that,” she apologized frantically. “I was extremely inebriated, I was stressed, and I didn’t— I just—“
“Needed a little stress relief?” Suggestive, witty. He laughed as she shoved him again, this time catching her hand and keeping it against his chest. “Hey. You don’t have to apologize for anything. You did nothing wrong.”
“It was inappropriate,” she argued.
“It was hot.” The claim shocked him as much as it shocked her. He didn’t plan to divulge that much so soon, but he went along with it anyway. “I couldn’t stop thinking about it all weekend. I only stopped you because you were drunk, and I wasn’t going to take advantage of you. I wouldn’t do that to anyone, especially you.”
Were the candies spiked? Did he gift her edibles? Was this really happening? Valeria could only stare, mouth slightly agape. “No mames,” she finally said. “It’s not funny.”
Rafael shook his head. “I’m not joking,” he insisted. “And I’m not lying when I tell you I wanna see if there’s something there.” Not that he wasn’t sure if there was already. He just needed to know if she felt it, too.
Valeria had dealt with a lot in her life. Her father dying, a junkie mother, a vicious cycle of abuse, raising a kid when she was just a kid herself. She’d seen some horrible things in the world, things that would make anyone hide away for the rest of their life. For Valeria, it was this. Admission of feelings that she swore she never wanted to deal with again. Valeria had chalked up that night to exactly what Rafael said: stress relief. Granted, she didn’t get it, but that’s all she was looking for.
Or so she thought. Could he hear her heart hammering in her chest? Valeria took a deep breath to steady her nerves. She tried to find the words, but came up short and exhaled heavily. Rafael held her hand tighter, leaned in closer. “I’m not expecting publicity,” he clarified. “Honestly, I don’t even want that. These feelings… I’ve had them before for another woman, a long time ago, and it didn’t turn out the best for me, so I understand that apprehension. We can keep it between us for as long as we need. I just… I don’t want to pass this up.” He wouldn’t. Not again.
How was it possible that all of that helped and didn’t, simultaneously? Valeria still felt that nagging anxiety about jumping into something new yet old. And yet… She relaxed a bit, her fingers against his chest playing with the collar of his shirt, tugging gently at his tie. “Does that come with the promise of more pilones?” She grinned, looking up at him from beneath dark lashes.
And somehow everything was brighter. Rafael smiled slowly. “As many as you want,” he promised, bringing her hand up to kiss her knuckles. “And how does dinner with me tonight sound?”
“Are you finally gonna cook for me?” A half step closer and their bodies were just barely touching, despite how much she wanted to feel him against her again. But she was sober. She could restrain herself better now… Right?
She was so close… His hand let go of hers, pushing her hair behind her shoulder and letting it glide down her back, stopping at her waist. “I just might,” Rafael mused quietly. “But I’m keeping an eye on your alcohol intake.”
And there went the mood. Valeria rolled her eyes, stepping back. “I’m already sick of you. I’m getting back to work.” Rafael opened his mouth to sass more, but Valeria stopped him with a hand over his mouth. “Aht!” She slid her hand down, opening his mouth and putting her sucker in. “Shut up.” She walked out, but not before giving a final warning glare.
Rafael stayed put for a moment longer, a big, goofy smile on his face. Valeria was far from his usual type, but holy fuck, was he enamored. She was bold and fiery. Along with amusing and charming, it was a major turn on. His tongue swirled over the sucker she placed in his mouth, savoring the flavor of cherry and her. Easy, Rafa. Not here. He took a calming breath, collecting himself and pushing his sinful thoughts aside before he took his leave.
•••••••••••••••
6:41PM
The oxytocin made from the earlier agreement between Valeria and Rafael died down, gradually being replaced with worry as each hour passed. Valeria still hadn’t heard anything from Isabella, even hours after she was suppose to be home from school. It just wasn’t like Isabella to not check in, let alone skip classes. From her fourth hour gym class on, she was a no show. But even if she had skipped the rest of the school day, Valeria was fully prepared to not give a shit, so long as she was safe. She kept checking her phone every five minutes for anything. A call, a text, an email, something.
Valeria reluctantly started shutting down for the night, slapping her laptop shut. She caught Amanda’s attention as she was also getting ready to leave. “Hey. Everything good with you?”
Valeria shook her head with a heavy sighed, pushing a hand through her hair. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “I haven’t heard from Isabella since this morning. She skipped all of her classes after gym and I haven’t been able to reach her.”
Amanda sympathized, also internally screaming that her own daughters could act out at one point or another. “I take it she doesn’t do this kinda thing often,” she assumed. “Anything I can do? Want me try calling her?”
“Could you? And if she answers, tell her I don’t care about her playing hooky right now, I just wanna know she’s safe.”
Amanda was already dialing Isabella on her phone. “Yeah, of course.” She reached over, squeezing Valeria’s arm.
Fin and Olivia were just about to make their way out, leaving Olivia’s office to see Valeria mildly distressed and Amanda on the phone. She quickly sensed the maternal worry and made her way over, Fin behind her. “Hey. What’s going on?” she asked, sharing in the collective anxiety.
“Isabella is skipping classes and not answering my calls,” Valeria explained.
“No answer for me,” Amanda announced regrettably, watching helplessly as Valeria started to pace.
Olivia set her purse and coat down on the desk, stopping Valeria. “Hey. Don’t worry, okay? We’re gonna find her.” She turned to Fin and Amanda. “Amanda, try to track Isabella’s phone. Fin, I want you to call Carisi. I know he’s home for the night, but see if he can stop by Valeria’s apartment and see if she’s home.”
Olivia turned her attention back to Val. Her heart aches for her, knowing very well the fear of not knowing where your little one was. It never went away, not even years after the fact, after getting Noah back safe and sound. “Val. Deep breaths, okay?” She sat with her at one of the desk. “Can you think of anywhere Isabella would go? A friend’s house? A relative?”
She thought she was done being victimized. Valeria had already lost count of how many times she’d asked someone else these questions. It took some getting use to. The familiar feeling of being sat down and questioned made her feel sick. “She has her friends, Marisol and Heather, but Marisol is visiting the Dominican Republic with her family, and Isabella was with Heather all weekend.”
“Is it possible she went back with Heather, then?”
Valeria shook her head. “I called Heather’s mom when school let out,” she explained. “Heather hadn’t seen her since third period and she didn’t leave school with her.” She fidgeted in her seat, pushing her hands in her hair again, pulling at the roots. “God dammit. What the hell is she thinking?”
“She’s a kid, Val,” Olivia reminded gently with a reassuring smile. “Often times, they don’t think at all.” She was learning that herself the older Noah got. More so with his classmates than with him, and for that, she was grateful.
Valeria scoffed. “Ain’t that the truth,” she muttered. She turned to her Mac Book, opening it again to try calling Isabella one more time. “You know, she wanted to go to Coachella next year, so I preordered tickets for her and her friends. Now I have to see if she’ll even have a social life by that point. She is so grounded.”
Olivia chuckled. “Need me to get you anything?”
“Coffee? Light cream and sugar?” She smiled in thanks, turning her attention to the laptop as Olivia got her her caffeine. She sighed harshly as she checked every messaging app for a fifth time, still with nothing to ease her worries.
“Hey, Val? TARU tracked her phone,” Amanda informed, turning the laptop toward her. “Is that address familiar?”
Valeria squinted at the screen, mentally cursing herself for already taking out her contacts, but she was able to make out the address. “This little shit,” she cursed, but felt immense relief. “That’s Sean Morris’s house, a kid on her debate team.”
A small smile grew on Amanda’s face. “A crush?”
“A huge one.” Valeria shook her head, rolling her eyes. “I swear to God, I’m already over having a teenager, and she’s not even mine.”
Olivia chuckled, standing with Valeria and gathering her things. “Well, at least we can say this conclusion is better than the alternative. What happens now?”
Valeria slipped on her jacket, phone in hand. “What happens is I’m gonna text her to have tonight, because she’s grounded as fuck tomorrow morning.” Until then, Valeria would have fun herself. It was her birthday, after all.
After saying good nights and leaving the precinct, she sent Rafael a text before she started driving. ‘Hit a little panic but all good now. B there in 20.’ Just before she rolled away, she was sent a response that she couldn’t help but smile at.
‘Take ur time, Te mantendré más tiempo cuando estés aquí ;)’
Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
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DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
But Valeria wasn’t ready to go home and turn in quite yet. She stood at her door for at least a minute and a half before continuing down the hall to another unit. Her fist hammered drunkenly against the door as she leaned against the frame.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Friday, October 28th, 9:32PM
Valeria planted a solid kiss to Isabella’s temple before she handed her two backpacks; one full of schoolwork, the other with a change of clothes. Set for a sleepover with her best friend. “Call me if you need anything, okay?” she reminded. “There’s three-hundred dollars cash in your toiletries bag, two-hundred in the debit card. Keep your location on, m—“
“Make sure my phone is charged if I go out, don’t walk after dark, stick to the main roads if I have no choice,” Isabella finished for her sister, the instruction committed to memory. She pulled back from Valeria’s embrace, smiling up at her. “I know, Val.”
Thirteen going on thirty. It seemed like only yesterday that Valeria took Isabella home, just the two of them against the world. She didn’t know the first thing about raising a kid back then, but she gave it everything she had, gave Isabella everything she had. There were so many nights that Valeria stayed awake in bed, crying into her pillow because she didn’t know what the next day would bring. She was just a kid herself, thrown into adulthood. What did she know about taking care of a toddler?
Close to nothing, but when she woke up every morning and saw the sweet smile of that baby girl, her worries didn’t exist anymore. As long as Isabella was alive and smiling. She was Valeria’s entire world, and she would do anything to keep that world spinning. Smiling nostalgically, Valeria laid another kiss to her baby sister’s forehead. “Of course you do,” she agreed. “Have fun, okay? I’ll pick you up Monday.” She watched as Isabella scampered off across the sidewalk and up the stairs of the brownstone, waving her off until the door closed. She sighed, forcing herself to head back to the car.
Not a moment after just barely getting the car door open, a voice called her name. It struck her like a bullet in her lung. Breathing felt like fiberglass in her lungs, her blood like ice. Don’t turn around. But her body moved on its own, terror filled eyes catching smiling blue eyes, a sinister evil hidden in the depths. His smile was still just as charming and deadly. “Look at you,” Connor mused. “All grown up.”
Sick. She felt sick. Did he see Isabella? Did he see which building she went into? Was he following her? “I told you to leave me alone,” she growled, voice kept low to keep the wavering undetectable.
Connor chuckled, shaking his head and tilting his head. “Come on, Val. I just wanna chat. Can’t we do that?” He reached out to touch her arm.
On instinct, Valeria smacked his arm away. Rage replaced fear, jaw set tight. Her nails dug into her palm as her hand balled into a tight fist. She was sick of being afraid, sick of running and hiding. “Cut the shit, Davis,” she hissed, finally standing up to him. “We both know who you are, what you are. You may have been able to fool C.O.s and judges and God knows who else, but it’s public record what a disgusting piece of shit you are, and you and I both know that will never change.” The shock on Connor’s face was near priceless, spurring her on. “In case you didn’t know yet, I’m a cop, so I would think twice about fucking with me, if I were you. You’re already on parole. Do yourself a favor and stay far the fuck away from me. I won’t tell you twice.”
The facade fell. Surprise turned into a black look, the man Valeria once knew making a return, but this time without a mask. Connor was already made as a monster. There was no reason to continue to put on a front. He nodded slowly. “Fine,” he rumbled. “But I’m not letting this shit go, Valeria. You took ten years of my life away from me.” He stepped close, close enough to hear her heart hammer in her chest, her breaths shake with fear. “And I intend to return the favor.”
Valeria held her ground as best she could, but as Connor was walking away, everything felt like it was spinning. Her blood was ice cold in her veins, every organ in her body felt like they were dropping to the dirt. She was careful as she lowered herself down into the car, eyes squeezed shut, trying to rip herself awake from the nightmare. There was no way this was happening. He couldn’t really be that stupid, could he? Would he really risk—
Her phone rang and Valeria shrieked. God dammit… Anger and guilt introduced themselves into the mix of fear. It was one thing to always be alert, but now she was paranoid, every little thing setting her off. “Castillo,” she said, not even realizing that she’d answered her phone.
“Hey, it’s Sonny.” As if caller ID didn’t exist. “You still dropping off Bella?”
She let out a dry laugh. “You know she hates that nickname,” she scolded lightheartedly. “And I actually just dropped her off. I was about to head home.”
“Maybe you can head to the bar instead?” he suggested. “Just for a few drinks, for your birthday. I know it’s not until Monday, but we wanna do something nice for you.”
Speechless again, but in a better way than Connor left her. Even just on the phone with a partner, she felt safe. So tell him. Tell him what happened. “I don’t know. All that paperwork today, I kinda just wanna go home and unwind.”
Carisi groaned. “Come on, Val,” he begged. “One drink. You know your coworkers can be your friends too, right?”
Of course he was right again. That was starting to get annoying. As much as she didn’t want to celebrate her birthday, who was she to deny that for her friends? “Alright, fine. I’ll be there in twenty.” She hung up, dropping her phone back into her purse. Valeria knew the rational thing to do was to tell her coworkers, her boss. She knew better than to keep this quiet from the squad.
But did she really? The whole drive to the bar, she was watching herself in the mirror, rehearsing lines in her head if someone asked how she was doing. She even took extra time in the car until she believed it herself that she was okay. Deep breaths. Fix your hair. Smile. Valeria walked into the bar, head held high as she made her way toward the corner booth in the back. For the time being, she really did believe things were alright, seeing her squad waiting for her. “How did you guys even know my birthday was coming up?” she quipped, squeezing into the booth next to Sonny.
Sonny laughed, wrapping his arm around her in a side hug and sliding her a drink. “Hey, just be grateful we didn’t throw you a party.”
“It was two to two. Fin and Liv talked me and Carisi out of it,” Amanda explained, giving her lieutenant and sergeant a playful side glare. Though deep down, she was also a little grateful that she didn’t have to go through the hassle of wrangling everyone for a party.
Valeria hummed, downing the pint in one go. Probably not the best idea on an empty stomach, but she had the whole weekend to herself. She held confidence that she could let herself go for a bit, in good faith that Isabella was safe. Time for herself. Time to unwind.
•••••••••••••••
Saturday, October 29th, 12:00AM
She was definitely not the party girl she use to be, if she ever was one. Sure, she could drink any man under the table, but it was easier when she wasn’t surrounded by loud music and sports channels. But with the stress of Davis’s threat, Valeria was able to push past those minor grievances and drink probably way more than she should’ve. Olivia had driven her home, leaving her car at the bar. Already that felt like Valeria was losing control, so she insisted that she would be able to make it up to her apartment on her own. Win some, lose some.
But Valeria wasn’t ready to go home and turn in quite yet. She stood at her door for at least a minute and a half before continuing down the hall to another unit. Her fist hammered drunkenly against the door as she leaned against the frame.
Rafael was also more of a night owl. The cases he’d dealt with in court, the nightmares he’d seen. Hell, he wasn’t even defending those people, but just being within their vicinity took up a good portion of his mind enough to keep him up late. And how did he help it? By reviewing more cases. The man was a workaholic by nature. Even if there was nothing to work on, he’d find something. In the midst of doing so, he was pulled away from his file nest he’d made on his bed, pulling on a plain white T-shirt and his recently worn slacks as he head for the door. It wasn’t unusual for for anyone to call for him at late hours, but it was unusual when they were drunk. Rafael’s face was riddled with confusion when he opened the door to see Valeria held up by the doorframe. “Val? ¿Estás bien?”
She giggled, swaying against the wood. “Si, si. Muy bien,” she slurred. “Can I come in?” This was a very bad idea. The sober voice in the back of her mind was screaming it from the bottom of the bottle that she emptied. But that didn’t stop her from stumbling into Rafael’s apartment. It was almost exactly how she imagined. It was his office, just expanded into a livable state. “Do you ever leave work at the office?” she teased him about it.
Rafael huffed a laugh, closing the door. He hasn’t seen her this drunk before. It was slightly worrisome, but he was confident he knew her well enough to know how to keep things running smooth. He would still tread carefully, however. Valeria seemed… unstable. “Is that a complaint? As a guest?”
Valeria blew a raspberry, flopping down on his couch. “Please. It’s when I stop complaining about you that you need to be worried. Means I really don’t like you.”
“You really came here just to bully me,” Rafael laughed, heading to the kitchen to get her a glass of water.
“Aww, come on. You strike me as a guy that likes dominant women.” Jesus, she was really drunk. Her filter was completely disintegrated. “You weren’t at the bar tonight.”
His brows raised, momentarily confused as he set the water down on the coffee table. “Was I suppose to be?”
A tiny shrug. “Carisi wanted to get drinks for my birthday. The whole squad was there.” She grabbed the water, looking down into the clear glass. “I kinda expected you to be there.” She wanted him to be there. Valeria didn’t want much from anyone, much less men. A side effect from having her case being public record was the pitiful stares she got, a million and one offers to help her out. Some of them were thoughtful. Help with rent, a babysitter for Isabella, a home cooked meal every few nights. Other offers were just straight up insulting, offering to take Isabella to a home where she’d grow up with a mother and father. A ‘proper’ home, as they called it. Eventually she stopped listening to and taking any offers. She wanted to prove she could do it all on her own. She didn’t need anything, she didn’t want anything.
But she wanted Rafael there. The one she gave the worst attitude to, and Valeria wanted him around the most for her birthday. “Well… If it’s any consolation, I didn’t even know you were at the bar tonight. No one told me anything.” But that didn’t stop him from feeling guilty.
Valeria shook her head, sipping the water. “Pretty sure that’s my fault,” she admitted. “They probably think I still can’t stand you. I am pretty mean to you.”
“But it’s all in good fun,” he defended. “It’s not like we want to kill each other. Or at least I hope so.”
Valeria laughed. “Don’t worry, I can tolerate you enough to let you live.” She leaned into him, bumping shoulders. “And I like my squad, but… I don’t know. I appreciate them wanting to do something for me, but at the same time, I just…”
Her birthday was a sore spot. Rafael remembered the conversation well. It was the first time he saw a glimpse of her heart through the stone walls she’d built around it. He read the files on her case front to back, and all the personal notes were more or less the same. Valeria was strong, determined. He just worried how much she could take before she broke.
But that wasn’t his call to make. It was up to her to ask for help. His offer was always on the table. And for now, it seemed all she needed was a distraction. “I don’t suppose you dance, do you?” he asked suddenly to cut the silence.
Valeria blinked, confusion contorting her face more dramatically while she was drunk. “Dance?” she repeated in question. “First of all, that’s an offense that you ask me that, like I’m not from the island. Second…” Another pause, her eyes shutting for a moment as she tried to come up with a second point. She snorted a laugh, shaking her head. “I got nothing. Yeah, I dance.”
Rafael chuckled, leaving back to his room to grab his cell phone. Before he even came back, Como La Flor by Selena started playing, Valeria beaming and squealing and laughing excitedly as she pushed herself up off the couch. Rafael laughed again, catching her as she stumbled. “You sure you had enough to drink?” he poked fun, holding Valeria steady against him as he lead their dance. He truly didn’t mind, though. He’d rather her be drunk and smiling than any combination of sad or scared.
“I don’t care if it’s a cliché stereotype, Selena is a musical goddess.” Valeria hung off Barba, looking like those drunk bimbos she always made fun of at the bars. She sang along, music and alcohol in her veins.
She was just full of pleasant surprises. He couldn’t remember the last time he smiled like this. What made it better was knowing when she sobered up, he would be able to tease the ever loving shit out of her about it. “I don’t know. What about J-Lo?” he asked, laughing when she gasped.
“You can’t pin the two against each other like that!” she whined. “That’s not fair!” She shoved against his chest, stumbling backward with a yelp.
“Jesus Christ, be careful,” Rafael laughed, grabbing her around the waist to keep her from falling.
Before either of them knew it, Valeria’s lips were on his. Beer on her breath and scotch on his, mixing into a dangerously aphrodisiacal blend. Rafael forgot everything in that moment, Valeria’s touch lighting every nerve in his body on fire. Rafael’s hands gripped and clawed at her leather jacket, arms tight around her, pulling her closer against him as her own bunched his shirt in her grip, back arched and body pressed into him.
It was all only a matter of time before the tension between them blew up like this. Valeria felt it since the night in her own apartment, she just didn’t want to let herself realize it. But the second their tongues dance, the way Rafael held her body against the wall with his, it was over. She was undone, just as she tried to undo their clothes.
How she managed to get so deep under his skin so quick a was fucking phenomenon. It took years for him and Olivia to just be friends, yet only a few months later knowing Val and his hands were pushing up her bra, reaching into the back of her pants, hands full of breast and ass.
But of all the ways this came to fruition… “Valeria, wait,” he panted through kisses, forcing himself to stop. “Wait. Stop. We have to stop.” Rafael managed to pull back just enough, an arm around her waist and the other against the wall to keep them both steady and grounded, a regretful look in his eyes. “You’re drunk. We can’t.”
Well if that wasn’t sobering, nothing was. Rationality flooded back into her senses, haziness turning clear. Valeria felt herself growing hot with utter embarrassment. “Oh… Oh, my God, I’m— I’m so—“ And then came the sickness, and the last thing she was going to let happen was making a mess of vomit all over his hardwood floor. She pried herself away from Rafael, hands in her hair as she took deep, yet rapid breaths. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I just— I didn’t—“
No. No, no, no. Valeria’s panic made him panic. “Valeria, just breathe, it’s okay.” He took a step toward her, hands out to her. “It’s okay, you didn’t do anything wrong, we just—“
“I’m so sorry, Rafa, I—“ What else could she say? Could she say anything that didn’t end up with her foot in her mouth or embarrassing herself even more? Shit… The contents of her stomach bubbled. She had to leave. Valeria bolted for the door, throwing it open and rushing out, back to her apartment. She just barely made it inside and to the bathroom.
Leaving Rafael in his own apartment, stunned, breathless, and… He sighed roughly, pushing his hands over his face and through his hair, trying to will away the strain in the front of his slacks, to no avail. Christ alive, this was already a whirlwind. Rationally, he knew the best course was to put distance between the two of them. Draw a line and make sure to never cross it. But he hadn’t felt like this about someone since… Shit, since Yelina. No name could make him smile just hearing it, no woman was ever on his mind the first thing in the morning and last thing at night like Yelina was.
Until Valeria. Her take-no-shit attitude, golden heart, determination, and confidence. It was a rare combination he saw in very few women, especially the ones who had been through so much. Or was either that or they gave up completely, let someone else take the reigns. But not Valeria. Every little thing to knock her down just gave her ammunition to stand back up again. Fuck… Fuck, she was near perfect. There was no way he would be able to keep himself away from her. He was in deep.
Hey, I’m loving your marked series! Do you know when the next chapter will be out 🥰🥰?
Oh, bless! I’m so glad you enjoy it!
I know I posted the first four chapters all within a pretty close proximity of each other, but I decided that, starting with Chapter 5, I’ll be posting a new chapter on Tumblr every Friday at 9PM US-CST and on AO3 every Saturday at 7PM US-CST.
Also, to make it easier to find my Masterlist and/or chapters of Marked, I will be using #l&o: marked in the tags of each post regarding the series.
Thank you so much for taking an interest in my story! 😭 I can’t tell you how much it means to me! ♥️♥️
Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
DM or send an ask to be on the taglist!
DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
Valeria shook her head. “I’m scared,” she whispered to hide the break in her voice. Scared of losing herself again, scared of getting hurt. Scared for Isabella… “I can’t be the same girl Connor made me into that year. I’ll never be that me again.”
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Monday, September 5th, 1:12PM
"This is bullshit," Valeria complained for the umpteenth time in the past two hours of moving hers and her sister's belongings into the new apartment. She knew it was for the best, for the safety of her and Isabella, but that didn't mean she wouldn't complain about it the whole time. They practically grew up together in that simple apartment. No matter what was going on in the outside world, whatever chaos reigned over New York, they had each other in their little safe space.
Isabella couldn't help but smile at her sister, setting a box down to hug her instead. "You said that already," she quipped, squeezing tighter when Valeria's arms wrapped around her. The last two days were full of silent packing, tension making the air thick and unbearable. It wasn’t until Isabella begged Valeria, nearly breaking down into tears, to tell her what was going on just the night before. It was a long night of honesty and crying, but it was much needed for the both of them.
“Does she always complain this much?” Sonny questioned from the living room, helping Fin set the furniture where it needed to be.
“It’s worse at home.” Isabella laughed when Valeria playfully pushed her away by her head. “I’m gonna go unpack my room.”
Valeria followed as far as the kitchen, unpacking the dishes. “Don’t put your music too loud,” she reminded, hearing the door close and the hum of pop music faintly after. She let out a heavy sigh, looking around the new apartment. As grateful as she was for the help, it went against everything she stood for. It was hard to break the do-it-yourself mindset, much less not be upset when it didn’t happen that way. “So much for independence,” she muttered.
Fin just barely heard her, glancing over with a dismal expression. “Hey. Val.” He joined her in the kitchen, leaning against the counter next to her. “I get it. You’ve been doing everything on your own since you were eighteen, you think you can take on the world. But you don’t gotta take it on alone.”
Her shoulders slumped, head hanging with a sigh as she placed a mug in the cabinet. “It’s not that, Fin,” she murmured. “I just… God… I just don’t like how this feels. Being dependent on people.”
“Everyone’s gotta depend on someone sometimes,” he insisted. “That doesn’t make you any less independent. It just means you got people in your corner to help you.”
Valeria shook her head. “I’m scared,” she whispered to hide the break in her voice. Scared of losing herself again, scared of getting hurt. Scared for Isabella… “I can’t be the same girl Connor made me into that year. I’ll never be that me again.”
He felt his heart break for her, placing a gentle yet firm hand on her shoulder. “You won’t be,” Fin promised. “What Connor did, how he was with you, that wasn’t for you. That was for him. This? What we’re doing to help you? This is for you, and Isabella. We want to see you thriving.”
Despite having heard so much of it within the past few months on the squad, words of comfort and affirmation were still so foreign to Valeria. The last time she’d heard it was when she reported Davis, but rarely anything since. Even in vice, everyone was tough love. Interesting, wasn’t it? The precinct with the hardest cases had a team with the biggest hearts. She nodded with a soft and genuine smile. She believed him. She had no reason not to.
“Hey, Val,” Sonny called as he made his way to the kitchen. “I hate to do this to you, but my sister just text me, said my niece needs my help with a problem at her school.”
Her brows furrowed as she straightened up with concern. “Is everything okay?”
He waved a dismissive hand. “Yeah, it’s nothing big, just a rooming problem. She’s just stuck at work and needs me to fill in.” He pointed toward the living room. “We got all the heavy stuff in. I can come back later tonight to help unpack—“
“No, no, no, no, Sonny, you helped enough,” she insisted gratefully. “You and Fin. But if you guys want to come back later tonight, Liv and Amanda are gonna stop by, too, for a little housewarming dinner. Nothing fancy, just some takeout for Li Tsung’s over on Krammer.”
“We’ll be there,” he promised, grinning wide as he hugged her goodbye and pat Fin’s arm before leaving.
Fin hugged Valeria next, holding her for a moment longer. “It’s gonna be alright. I promise.” He rubbed her back soothingly as she relaxed against him. He couldn’t imagine the stress she was under, but he could do his best to help hold her together. Fin pulled back, giving her shoulders a squeeze before he, too, left until the evening.
•••••••••••••••
Tuesday, September 6th, 1:35AM
Half past one in the morning. Everyone had left for their own home and Isabella was fast asleep. In spite of the threat against Valeria, it was the first time in a long time that things felt peaceful. There was no danger, no Connor Davis. That night, it was just friends, some alcohol, and a good time. There was laughter, reminiscing, storytelling. It was sad to say that Valeria never had this until she joined SVU. From the very start of her adult life, she had to be a workhorse, a powerhouse. Provide for herself and her sister. She rarely let herself relax, let herself just be. But tonight she did, and she felt like she could breathe.
But she still couldn’t sleep, sitting on the couch with a glass of red wine, wearing her sleep shorts and a Guns ‘N’ Roses tank top. When it was just herself and the silence, the thoughts came back. What if Connor found her again? What if she could never be safe? What if—
She was plucked from her thoughts upon hearing a knock at the door. Her intrusive thoughts swirled in her mind. It’s him. He found me. Slowly, Valeria stood from the cushions and set her wine down on the glass coffee table, taking quiet steps toward the door. Her hand rested on her gun on the small table by the door as she peeked out the peephole. She sighed heavily in relief and annoyance, opening the door. “Rafael,” she huffed.
Rafael smiled anyway. Was it rude to come over at such a late hour without warning? Yes. Did he care? Not really. Besides, something in his gut told him she’d be awake anyway, and lo and behold, he was right. “I’m just checking in,” he insisted.
Valeria raised a brow. “At one in the morning?”
“Did I wake you?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
“What if I say yes?”
“Then you’d be a liar.”
Valeria tried, and failed, to fight the grin off her face. This man was one of the most irritating she knew, and also one of the best. He was cocky and stubborn and liked to push people’s buttons, but he also liked to help where he could and as much as he could. Now that sounded familiar. “We missed you at dinner,” she claimed, stepping to the side to let Rafael in.
He stepped in, resting his briefcase against the wall as he pulled off his coat. “Got caught up in the office,” he explained vaguely. “I had some work to finish that I’d been putting off for a while. Next thing I know, it’s past midnight.”
Valeria hummed, closing the door and scooping up her wine from the coffee table before heading to the kitchen. “Well, make yourself comfortable. There’s plenty of leftovers, I’ll heat some up for you. Drink?”
Rafael was never one to refuse hospitality. “Whatever you’re having.” He looked around the living area, slowly walking along the walls as if in an art gallery. “You made quick work of unpacking,” he noted.
“Well, the lieutenant doesn’t want me back until I’m settled, and I want to get back as soon as possible,” she explained with reason.
Rafael hummed, zoned in on how she had put herself into her new home. Pictures of her and Isabella throughout the years decorated the walls alongside various decor. Some simple and just for aesthetic, others clearly as a show of appreciation to her homeland. A picture of a coqui, some vejigante masks, copies of famous paintings Goyita and La Virgen del Rosario. He focused on the paintings, their meanings. It was incredibly fitting for Valeria. The more he understood her pride, the more he admired it.
Valeria came back in moments later with a hot plate and glass of Merlot, setting them down quietly on the coffee table. She noticed how intently he examined everything, like he was committing it to memory. Committing her to memory. Maybe it was conceited to think about it that way, but that’s how it was, wasn’t it? The photos, the art. That was all part Valeria. Rafael was getting to know her through it all. And it felt… nice.
Valeria walked up next to Rafael, connecting his line of sight to a picture of her in a big, green ball gown, done up like a Princess and standing between an older man and woman. “That was my quinceañera,” she explained, a wistful air to her voice. “I was actually still fourteen when we had the party. We had to have it early because my grandma and grandpa on my dad’s side had flown in from Puerto Rico early.” She pointed to another picture of a much older couple. “That’s them.”
Rafael smiled gingerly. “Then that means this is mom and dad,” he assumed, gesturing to the picture of the three. They all looked so happy.
She smiled with him, though hers was laced with a hint of mourning. “Yeah. We didn’t know it yet, but Mami was pregnant with Isabella at the time we took the picture.” Her smile faded. “We didn’t find out until after Papi died a month later.”
His chest ached. He could only assume that was when her mother started using again. It pained him and made him so angry. How could anyone, a mother growing a life inside her, be so selfish and not care about that life? Maybe it wasn’t right to judge. Rafael didn’t know the pain of losing a spouse. Hell, he never really had a real relationship, let alone ever gotten married. “How did he pass?”
“Pancreatic cancer. He’d had it for a couple years, but it progressed quickly toward the end.”
Rafael looked at the picture again. Unless you actually looked for it, you couldn’t tell he was sick. You just saw a father celebrating his daughter’s big day. Living in the moment, knowing there wouldn’t be another chance for a moment like this. “Is that also why you had the party early?” he dared to asked, scared he already knew the answer. “He was getting weaker, and he wanted to have one more special day with you?”
Valeria bit her lip hard, taking a deep breath. Wordless confirmation. It still hurt, tears stinging her eyes. “He died in his bed, holding my hand… The day after my fifteenth birthday.” God fucking dammit… What the hell was happening to her? Out of everyone she let peek through the stone walls, why was it Rafael? If it was Olivia or Fin, that would make more sense. They’d already seen her at her most raw ten years ago. But Rafael? The guy that she swore up and down acted like a huge dick to compensate for his lack there of?
Rafael didn’t have an answer for it either, but he was honored she did nonetheless. Even though it broke his heart. Even more so that she still tried to keep it inside. He comforted her the best way he knew how to in these types of situations, which… Which he honestly didn’t know how to very well at all. He brought a hand carefully to her back, rubbing soothingly up and down.
Her chin quivered, but Valeria fought it back quickly, taking a deep breath and tilting her head back to drain the tears. She cleared her throat and shook her head, taking a step back as she turned toward the couch. “Anyway, your plate’s ready. Don’t let it get cold.” She was grateful he didn’t argue or protest. Just followed her to the couch, sitting in front of his place. She sat next to him, legs tucked beneath her with her glass of wine in hand. “So, can I ask about work or is it confidential?”
Rafael hummed as he took a bite of his egg roll. If it was a subject change she needed, he’d oblige, despite his own reservations of doing so. “Actually, I was looking more into those cases that we couldn’t get to stick to Davis,” he admitted. “His two previous girlfriends that he killed.”
She shook her head, huffing with utter disbelief and confusion. “How did those charges not stick? I mean, it’s clear as day that it was him.”
“To you, yes, because you know what he’s capable of. You’ve been through it first hand,” he reminded. “But to a jury, it would’ve been circumstantial.”
She scoffed. “Yeah, and that fact that he just so happened to be dating both victims at the time of their deaths is just bad luck, right?” she jeered, sipping her wine.
Rafael held his hands up. “Hey, I don’t pick the jury,” he defended. “If it were up to me, Davis would’ve been locked away after the first one. Spare you this chaos.”
She gave a nonpartisan shrug. “I don’t know. I think if it wasn’t him that brought me to SVU ten years ago, it would’ve been my mom’s drug habits, and I still would’ve ended up here. Not here.” She gestured to the new, fancier apartment. “But as a detective in SVU, working with you guys.”
Rafael blew out a tense breath, grabbing his glass. “An alternate timeline where I still work with you? Yikes.” Valeria’s jaw dropped and he snickered as he took a sip of his wine. She moved quickly, grabbing a shrimp from his plate and throwing it at his head. “¡Mis camarones no!” He laughed, grabbing her hand to keep her from hijacking more.
“¡Esos mis camarones, pendejo!” she laughed loudly.
A creak from the hallway grasp both of their attention and shut them up. Isabella slugged from her room, squinting in the living room light. Her hair wasn’t a rat’s nest, but it was evident of deep sleep. “You guys are loud,” she slurred, shuffling toward the kitchen.
“Sorry, Isa,” she called, holding back her giggles.
Isabella grumbled, leaving back to her room with a water bottle. “Just keep the loud sex at his place.”
Rafael choked on his wine, spilling it on the sleeve and front of his dress shirt. Oh, yeah. They were definitely sisters.
Valeria rolled her eyes heavily, finishing off her wine. “For that to happen, I’m gonna need some more Merlot,” she joked, standing from the couch to pour herself some more in the kitchen.
She just barely missed how Rafael paused in the middle of wiping off his shirt. That was a stark contrast from their usual ribbing. He watched her walk and disappear into the kitchen. Did she actually just say that? Was this a new level reached in their friendship? What the hell was going on? He stared off, starting to think… differently.
“Stand up.”
Valeria was suddenly in front of him, rag in one hand, spray bottle in the other. His eyes started at her bare legs, taking in the tiny details of the dragon tattoo that wrapped around her right thigh and disappeared under the hem of her shorts, skimming up the curve of her hips and waist, over her—
Stop it, Rafael. He mentally scolded himself as he stood, yet he just couldn’t take his eyes off her as she took his arm, spraying the stains on his white sleeve generously. “What is that?” he asked, a mix of distinct, yet vague scents lifting.
“Water, vinegar, baking soda, dish soap, and a little bit of lemon,” Valeria listed, scrubbing the fabric vigorously. She was zoned in, unaware of his gaze, thanks to the booze. Between the time the others had left and now, Valeria had consumed as least an entire bottle herself. Blissfully unaware.
Rafael grinned. “¿Lo aprendiste de tu abuela?”
She giggled, looking up at him. “Is it obvious?” She moved to the front of his shirt, undoing the top few buttons and tucking her hand beneath the stain to keep it from bleeding more onto his undershirt. “Come on, I know you got some good tips and tricks from your grandma.”
“A few things. A lot of food recipes.”
Valeria hummed. “I expect a home cooked meal now as an apology for coming by in the middle of the night.”
Rafael chuckled. “Sounds like a fair deal to me.” A promise instead of a witty remark. It seemed tonight was just full of surprises.
She draped the rag over her shoulder, glancing down at the mostly empty plate and half finished wine. “Refill on either of those?” She took them both, heading back for the kitchen.
More wine. Liquid courage. “Actually, I think I should turn in for the night.” Even just another sip might be enough to make him stay and do something he knew he shouldn’t. Rafael gathered his coat, grabbing his briefcase by the door. “You know where to find me if you need anything.”
Valeria felt a shard of disappointment, but she understood. She poured the rest of his wine into her glass, taking a sip before she joined him at the door. “Even at one in the morning?” She chuckled when he gave her a playful side glower. “I appreciate it.” But those three little words didn’t seem like enough. Her gratitude ran much deeper than words could describe. A new apartment, looking into a decade old charges for anything that could keep her and her sister safe, all for a person he hardly knew. Rafael’s help went beyond professional.
Valeria stepped closer, her arms clasping around him. She enveloped Rafael in a hug, chin resting on his shoulder with a deep sigh. Teakwood and scotch. A rough, but comforting scent. “Gracias, Rafa,” she spoke softly. “Por todo.”
Rafael tensed before he relaxed, reciprocating the unexpected gentle affection. He closed his eyes. Tea tree lavender and wine. “No me des las gracias,” he returned. He pulled back to look her in the eyes, still holding her by her waist. “Solo prométeme que estarás a salvo, ¿si?” Tears rimmed Valeria’s eyes as she nodded silently and he pulled her into another hug and kissed the side of her head. “Dios te bendiga.” Neither of them were necessarily religious, but comfort would be given and taken wherever it could be.
They both pulled away before too long, despite both not wanting to. It was the first time in so long that Valeria felt some kind of comfort like this, and so long since Rafael felt something like… this, in general. What was it? It was such an old feeling, but so familiar. Old enough to be lost, but present enough that maybe it could be found again. But until then, Rafael parted from the apartment, heading down the hall to his own. A final glance toward Valeria’s door just before it shut. He smiled gently, but it quickly fell. There would be no turning in tonight. He needed to find something that could reopen the cases against Connor Davis. He had to put him away.
Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
DM or send an ask to be on the taglist!
DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
“That’s what we’re for,” Fin told her, sitting on the other side of her. “She takes care of you, we take care of her. Just like we did ten years ago.” But now it was personal. Valeria was part of their little precinct family now, and SVU protected their own no matter what.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Saturday, September 3rd, 11:57AM
“Thank you, Lieutenant Benson, Mr. Barba. I couldn’t eat or sleep because of all the anxiety from having to testify.” A soft spoken young blonde woman was lead out of Olivia’s office, Olivia and Rafael shortly behind her. They’d gotten lucky with this case. The marital rape ones were always the hardest ones to bring to a jury. The wives were either too scared to testify or the jury still held the archaic mindset that a wife was a man’s property.
It always gave Olivia some kind of fulfillment when it went in the victim’s favor. Even more so when the perp plead guilty. “Well, now you won’t have to,” she assured with a proud smile. “He’ll get fifteen years. That’s more than enough time for you to finally start a new life.”
“Just take it one day at a time,” Rafael added. He wasn’t often one for words of affirmation and encouragement, but having worked with Olivia for so long, she was rubbing off on him, changing him for the better. Even his smile was warm as he waved off the woman.
Olivia let out a gentle sigh as the woman left before looking back to Barba. “Coffee before you go?”
“Always.” As a caffeine addict, having gone as long as he did without a cup of coffee was a sin. He’d woken up late, not having a chance to get his morning fix.
As they passed the desks toward the coffee station, Rafael did a double take toward Valeria’s desk. Instead of her, he saw a much younger brunette girl, her hair tied into a single, thick French braid that laid over her shoulder. She had her nose buried in a book, what he could only assume was algebra by the number of formulas. His brows furrowed as he stopped and stared, stopping Olivia as well. “Is it just me or do you have a Benjamin Button case on your hands?”
The girl looked up to face Rafael. “If you’re talking about the movie, then I hope you know that it’s pure fiction,” she said. “Hutchinson-Gilford progeria syndrome makes itself visible at latest around two years after birth, and it’s rare that anyone with it lives to be my age.”
Olivia laughed when Rafael’s brows shot up in evident astonishment. “Rafa, this is Valeria’s little sister, Isabella,” she explained.
“I forgot my apartment keys in my locker at school,” Isabella explained further.
Rafael’s brows furrowed. “It’s Saturday.”
“I’m on the debate team. We meet on Saturday mornings. I’m gonna be a lawyer.”
He could see the resemblance between her and Valeria in the way Isabella spoke. Assertive, bold, confident. He smiled. “An ADA in the making,” he mused. “Let your sister know I have connections to help get you there.”
“The day that happens is the day hell freezes over,” Valeria expressed as she came back from the break room with snacks and a soda for her sister. She set them down and tapped Isabella’s shoulder. “Tell him why, chica.”
Isabella sat up straighter. “Because Castillo women don’t give anyone the opportunity to say we wouldn’t have it if it wasn’t for them.” She looked up at her sister who was smiling at Rafael, vainglorious. She gave a small shrug. “But a little help wouldn’t hurt,” she added.
Valeria’s head whipped down to Isabella, wide-eyed and mouth agape. She scoffed, looking between her and Rafael, her boastful smile stolen and worn by him now. Eyes narrowed and Valeria groaned, rolling her eyes. “Fine,” she relented. “Just not from him.” Valeria gave a sardonic smile to Rafael as she went back to the break room.
But he saw right through it. The first time she smiled at Rafael that way was filled with disdain. It was written all over; in her eyes, in her body language. Now, three or four months after having been around each other more often, there was never anymore malice or spitefulness. But because she was so prideful, Valeria wouldn’t act any different. The banter was all too fun at this point. Rafael’s smile never dropped as he watched her walk away. “Glad she’s doing well,” he said to Olivia, taking a cup of coffee she’d poured for him.
She chuckled quietly, nodding. “Yeah. Considering, you know?”
“Are you talking about Connor Davis?” Isabella interrupted. When the lieutenant and ADA looked at her with stunned expressions and near pale faces, she felt only a little embarrassed and out of place. Then she noticed the other detectives looking her way. She shrank in on herself a little, fidgeting with her pencil. “It… It’s public record,” she explained, answering their unspoken question. “I looked it up after I overheard her talking on the phone with Fin about it. She said she barely sleeps anymore or sleeps in shifts. She checks in on me every night. Sometimes I pretend I’m asleep.” She looked around at the detectives. “She’s really scared.”
Olivia nodded gently, pulling a chair up to sit next to Isabella. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m sure she is,” she concurred gently. She set her coffee down next to her soda and took Isabella’s hand. “But she’s also really brave. And I know she would never let anything happen to you.”
“What about her?”
“That’s what we’re for,” Fin told her, sitting on the other side of her. “She takes care of you, we take care of her. Just like we did ten years ago.” But now it was personal. Valeria was part of their little precinct family now, and SVU protected their own no matter what.
Knowing this gave Isabella a small sense of security. She glanced toward the break room, lowering her voice to above a whisper. “Val doesn’t know that I know. Please don’t tell her.”
Fin furrowed his brows. “Tell her what? We’ve just been helping you with your homework. That’s all.” A slow and knowing smile, matched by Isabella. Things would be okay. Even if they weren’t now, or felt like they wouldn’t be, they would be.
But for sure, things felt completely haywire. Rafael could feel the array of chaotic emotions all the way from the break room. It twisted his stomach into knots. It wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, but every so often, he would let himself be concerned enough to check well-beings himself. He made his way to the break room, pushing through the door to find Valeria at the counter, dipping a teabag in and out of a mug full of hot water. “Valeria? You okay?” He let the door swing shut behind him, but he kept his distance.
Valeria shook her head, heaving a sigh. “I know she knows,” she rumbled, bringing up the topic herself after seeing everyone gather around her baby sister. “About Davis, about the case, about… all of it. She’s a smart kid. Can’t keep anything from her.” Not a damn thing, as much as she wished she could shield Isabella from this.
Rafael nodded slowly, taking a couple steps forward and setting his briefcase on the table. “So… why not talk to her about it?”
“Yeah, that sounds like the logical thing to do, right? But…” She shook her head again, turning to finally face him. “Do you have kids, Rafael? Any kids in your family? Nieces or nephews?” He shook his head and Valeria gave a weak half smile. “Isabella was a preemie. She was born two months early, addicted to meth and crack. The doctors said there was a slim chance she would make it. While our mom was in rehab, I was at the hospital every day after school, reading her stories and singing to her until visiting hours were over. Then I’d go home, clean, cook for myself, do my home work until two in the morning, then I’d go to sleep for a few hours, wake up to get to the hospital and see Isabella again for an hour or so until I had to leave for school. I did that for a little under a year until I was able to take her home.
“Our mom came home not long after that, and things were great for a while. She was attentive, involved. I was able to be a teenager for a little bit. But then it started again. The irritability, the weight loss, the episodes. I was sick of it by that point and I snapped. We got into it and she kicked me out. I was seventeen, about to turn eighteen, so it didn’t matter a whole lot what happened to me, so I went to live with my boyfriend at the time while I figured out how to help Isabella.”
“And the boyfriend was Connor Davis,” Rafael assumed.
Valeria nodded with a guilty and self-disgusted smile. “We argued a lot, but it wasn’t a big deal. Until I moved in. That’s when it got worse. It started with throwing things at walls, then it escalated to throwing things at me. Then hitting me. Choking me. Then…” She tensed, taking a deep breath to push back the nightmares. Not here. Not in public. She swallowed past the lump in her throat before continuing. “And because I was just trying to stay alive, I lost track of trying to help Isabella. I forgot about her. I only got up off my ass after I saw my mom and Isabella on the news. Mom had was arrested after going on a three day bender and my three-year-old baby sister home, alone, scared, and hungry.”
The hatred she felt for her mother that she’d repressed for so long, the agony of the guilt that killed her inside threatened to peek its ugly head through the cracks of the walls she’d built around her heart. Hot tears stung the back of her eyes. “After everything here, I went home with Isabella as her legal guardian. I had to be the strong one, had to take care of her. I never let her see me struggle, never let her see me cry. And I never will.” Valeria smiled, shaking her head softly in some attempt to keep the tears rimming her eyes in place. “I know she knows what happened. But she doesn’t need to know how terrified I am.”
But what if she already knew? But Rafael didn’t ask it out loud. Holy shit. This was the realest he’d ever seen her. No witty humor, no deflection. It wasn’t all of her, but it was honest. He could see the tears, the emotion swirling in her eyes, but it was still hard to read just how much was there. Even worse, it seemed like Valeria didn’t have anyone to let this all out to. She held onto this for over ten years, and still continues to hold onto it, as if she’d lose herself if she let go. For the first time in God knows how long, Rafael was speechless. In all his years, he’d never heard a story like this and seen the victim stand so tenaciously. Admittedly, Rafael was in awe. Through everything she’d dealt with, her only concern was her sister.
It must not have registered that way to Valeria. She wasn’t scantily clad by any means, but she still pulled her leather jacket closed, realizing only then just how much she had exposed herself to him, the guy she only gave the time of day to whenever her mean bone needed to be put to use. “Sorry,” she apologized, turning back to the cup of tea on the counter. “That was a whole trauma dump on you, you didn’t want to hear all that, you don’t care to—“
“Stop, don’t—“ He cut her off, carefully, but firmly. He stepped closer, right next to her at the counter. “Don’t do that. Don’t tell me I don’t care, okay? I do care. I wouldn’t have offered my help if I didn’t.” Truthfully, he offered a lot of people help. Mainly clients. And while he meant it, he especially meant it when it came to the detectives at SVU, especially now. Rafael gripped her elbow gently. “Hey. Look at me.” He looked her directly in the eye, making sure she saw the truth in his eyes. “I mean it. I want to help. We all do.”
Valeria wanted to talk back, make some sort of witty comment that would break the tension. The only tension broken was in her body when he touched her, shoulders relaxing. Before she knew it, she told him what she said she would keep to herself. “Connor came to my apartment last month.”
Rafael’s brows furrowed again, eyes wide, body tense. “He did what?” Amanda’s voice boomed, pulling the words right out of Rafael’s mouth. His and Valeria’s head snapped toward the door, seeing Amanda rush toward them while Sonny stared dumbfounded and called in Fin and Olivia. What great timing to check in on the two.
Panic. Valeria was a goddamn idiot, letting her guard drop, now this was about to be a whole thing. “Amanda, please—“
“What happened? What’s going on?” Fin demanded as he rushed in with Olivia.
“Valeria just told Barba that Connor Davis paid her a visit at her apartment last month,” Sonny explained with mild frustration and panic, not giving a single damn that Valeria was shrinking in on herself in culpability.
“Please, Olivia,” Valeria implored, holding her hands up. “I had it covered, everything’s fine, I—“
“What. Happened.” Explanation was not a request.
Well… She was bound to be in the doghouse with Olivia at some point. Valeria slumped, relenting. “He… came over late one night. Isabella was already in bed,” she explained quietly. “He knocked on the door, I opened the door, but kept the chain lock locked. He…” Fuck, she really didn’t want to deal with this.
But Olivia was having none of it. “Valeria.”
“He said he he never stopped thinking about me and was happy to see I was doing well, alright?” She knew it was bullshit, she knew what he meant. “I told him to get lost before I called you guys and slammed the door in his face.” And she didn’t sleep a wink for the next few days, but no one else needed to know that.
“You should’ve called us anyway, Val,” Amanda retorted. “I mean, the guy knows where you live, for God sakes.”
“I’m fine, you guys. I can handle this.”
“Yeah, we’re sure you can,” Fin agreed sarcastically. Even if she could, there was no way they’d let her. He started toward the door. “I’m gonna make some calls, see if we can get some Unis to keep an eye on Davis.”
Amanda followed after. “And on Isabella’s school.” If he knew where they lived, he knew where the girl went to school. As a mother, there was no way she was going to let the sick son of a bitch have the potential to get close to her.
Valeria panicked even more, racing after them. “Guys, wait, no, please—“
Sonny stopped Valeria, holding her by her shoulders. “Val, listen,” he directed. “This guy, whether convicted or not, is guilty of killing his two ex girlfriends that tried to leave him and report the abuse he did to them. You’re the one who got away with it and lived to tell the tale, and guys like Connor Davis? They don’t just let that go. You know that. This man is a killer, and he holds a grudge. You and Isabella are not safe.”
Carisi was right. Valeria was stubborn, but she wasn’t stupid. At least not totally. She held her fear down, morphed it into frustration. “Okay, well, what then?” she wondered aloud sharply. “What do we do? You heard Amanda, he knows where Isabella and I live.”
“My landlord put a couple apartments up on the market just last week,” Rafael spoke up, looking between the three for unanimity. “I think I can sweet talk her into letting them move in as early as tomorrow.”
Valeria balked. “I-I-I can’t afford to do that!”
He held up a hand as he grabbed his briefcase from the table. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll give you guys a call when we’re set.” Rafael sped out before Valeria could protest again.
“Perfect,” Olivia consolidated. “Carisi, go get some Unis on Valeria’s current apartment, then you and Rollins take her home. Fin and I can hold down the fort here. And you.” She looked to Valeria. “Go home, pack, do whatever it is you need to do. I don’t want to see you back here until you’re in the new place.”
There was no arguing, but that didn’t mean Valeria wasn’t going to complain. “What do I tell Isabella?”
Olivia only gave a shrug. “Whatever you have to.” It was as simple as that. At least on her end. Her job was to make sure her detectives and civilians were safe. She left the break room to do just that.
Valeria watched Carisi and Olivia leave, standing there dumbfounded. It had all happened so fast, moving at a hundred miles an hour. She exhaled heavily, pushing her hands through her hair as she tried to ground herself in the silence. She hated running. She didn’t run, she faced her problems. Valeria had been through so much and it all made her stronger. Why was this any different? She shook her head, heading for the door when she paused and saw her sister through the glass. It clicked then.
That’s what made the difference. Isabella. Valeria couldn’t face her problems like she use to. It wasn’t just her anymore. She had Isabella to think about now. If Valeria faced this head on and something went wrong, Isabella would be alone. No. That wasn’t going to happen. Valeria was gonna do anything and everything to protect the only thing that gave her purpose in life. “Te tengo,” she said quietly, but as if talking to Isabella. “No te dejaré.”
“No,” Valeria interrupted quickly, standing from her seat on weak legs, but still managing to hold herself steadfast. “No, no, that won’t be necessary. I can handle it.” She had to. For herself, for Isabella. Push it down. Force a smile. “Thanks for the heads up. I appreciate it, but I should get back to work.”
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Saturday, May 14th, 12:20PM
The only one who knew how to push buttons as well as Rafael was Olivia. Especially Rafael’s buttons. He stormed through the police station, annoyed beyond belief. It wouldn’t have been the first time Olivia had chosen to omit important information, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last, but it pissed him off nonetheless, every time, without fail. He’d spent the last two days going over the case files of convicts he himself prosecuted that were set to be let out on parole. In that mix was Valeria’s case, given to him upon his request, and while he now understood Olivia’s request to handle Valeria with gentle hands, his doubt was now laid heavy in her abilities to keep a level head on the job, especially if she knew what was about to come.
Rafael made his way to the open door of Olivia’s office, catching her in the middle of a phone call. “We need to talk,” he demanded.
Olivia held up a finger to signal wait, ignoring Barba rolling his eyes. “If he keeps scratching at it, there’s gauze and bandage tape in the first aid kit on top of the fridge,” she continued her conversation on the phone. “Okay… Okay, check the medicine cabinet in the bathroom or under the sink, there should be a new box of hydrocortisone… Did you find it? Great. Okay, great. Thank you, Lucy, I’ll be home as soon as I can. Okay. Okay, bye.” She hung up with a sigh, shaking her head. “Noah got into a patch of poison ivy at the park,” she explained to Rafael, standing to grab her coat from the rack. “He keeps scratching and making himself bleed, so I’m gonna take him to the hospital. How urgent is—“
“When were you going to tell me that Valeria Castillo was the victim in the Connor Davis case?” he interrupted, pale green eyes boring into her deep brown ones.
Olivia was momentarily stunned. Every time he caught an attitude with her, it managed to catch her by surprise, despite it being a regular occurrence. “I told you she was a victim here ten years ago,” she reminded firmly, pulling in her jacket.
“But not in the Connor Davis case,” he argued, closing the door behind him.
Olivia scoffed, rolling her eyes. “It was hardly a case. There was nothing him or his attorney could do to refute the allegations against him. It was a perfect case, opened and closed.”
Rafael shook his head, waving a dismissive hand. “The length of the case is irrelevant. This is Connor Davis we’re talking about.” Disbelief widened his eyes when it didn’t register to Olivia in the same way. “Connor Davis. Accused of beating, raping, and murdering two of his ex-girlfriends. You would’ve been here when that case was open.”
“There wasn’t enough evidence that he did any of it, we couldn’t charge him with anything.”
“But after Valeria came forward, you and I both know he did it.” Olivia had fallen silent. A clear tell that she couldn’t argue deniability. He nodded, taking a step forward. “He’s out on parole. You know that, right? And you promised me that this would have no effect on Valeria’s work abilities.
“Because it won’t,” she argued.
Another nod. “Uh-huh, right. Does she know?” Olivia responded with more silence. Predictable, yet unbelievable. Rafael would have assumed that over a decade on the job, she would know that withholding information of any kind from anyone, especially people in her squad, only ever ended in problems. “You need to tell her.”
There was no point in arguing anymore. Rafael was right. He always was. It was annoying. “Yeah, I know,” she relented, feeling guilty that she’d even thought about keeping it to herself from the start.
“Today.”
She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t slightly amused by his sudden peaked investment in Valeria’s well-being. “Where did the sudden interest come from?” she asked with a soft laugh as Barba started toward the door.
He looked back, brows raised. “It’s hardly interest,” he protested coolly. “Unless the interest is in making sure one of your detectives doesn’t become a ticking time bomb that could jeopardize future cases.”
Olivia rolled her eyes, catching a glimpse of Valeria walking into the squad room from her window. “Call her in.” She turned back toward her desk.
“I don’t think she likes me too much.” Rafael still found their first encounters amusing, brief as they were. There were worse people he’d tolerated an attitude from. At least Valeria was kind of cute.
He chuckled under his breath as Olivia shook her head in disapproval and went for the door, crossing to the other side of the office. “Castillo,” Olivia called, then beckoned her into the office.
Valeria felt a mild sense of panic. It was only her third day. Had she already gotten herself into trouble? She swallowed it down, keeping on a stoic demeanor as she took the short trek to the office. Eyes immediately found Barba. Fuck. She was in trouble. Yet even then, she failed to to stop herself from scowling at the ADA’s perpetually smug grin. “I’m not apologizing,” she declared immediately.
“I don’t expect you to,” he assured lightly, unaffected by her sour expression and stern tone. “Bull headed people rarely do.”
She spun her head back toward Olivia. “Lieutenant.”
“Behave, the both of you,” the lieutenant reprimanded, closing the door. Not even years on the job and being a boy mom could prepare her for two adult toddlers. Especially Barba. She didn’t take him for an instigator. “Valeria, this has nothing to do with what happened the other day, but I do expect that you’ll try to remain professional when you’re on the job. Just keep in mind what I told you about him.”
Valeria huffed, but felt a sliver of gratification when Rafael’s smirk fell at Olivia’s repartee. “Alright.” She relaxed. “So, what’s going on?”
A glance was exchanged between Olivia and Rafael. “Have a seat, Val.” Olivia took her gently by the arm, sitting with her in the chairs in front of her desk. She held her hand, her maternal instincts mixing with her professionalism upon the slightest sense of Valeria’s tension. “So… your case…”
Valeria’s brows furrowed. “What about it? Is he wanting a retrial or something?” On what grounds? It wasn’t possible Connor had any basis for a retrial. She was assured it was cut and clean.
Rafael pushed their nonsensical feud aside for now. “Worse, actually.” He held a more thoughtful tone, his disposition careful as it was with the more fragile victims. “He’s been let out on parole.” He always prided himself on keeping his own emotions out of cases knowing damn well he sucked at it. If anything, he was better at hiding it, but he felt the sucker punch to his gut when Valeria went pale.
Valeria didn’t want to believe it. She wanted to laugh and wanted them to laugh with her, tell her it was just a joke. But why would Olivia joke about that? Easy answer: She wouldn’t. “But… But he was supposed to do twenty-five.” Her voice was as cold as her blood. Numb. Frozen.
God, if this wasn’t one of the hardest things Olivia had to do. It never got easier no matter how many times she did it. “Yeah, I know. But he was able to get out on reformed behavior.” She squeezed her hand. “But that doesn’t mean he’ll be able to get anywhere near you. He’s in a shelter and he’s going to be under strict supervision.”
All Valeria heard was muffled voices. For ten years, she lived in mild comfort knowing that she wouldn’t have to worry about Davis being free. She thought she had more time to prepare. Fifteen years more time. At least another five before she had to tell Isabella anything about it. Oh, god… Isabella. The sweetest girl at such a pivotal time and age in her life. All she should be worried about was her grades and what she was going to wear to the spring formal dance, not her big sister’s safety and sanity. Safety. Fuck, what if he went after Isabella? He wouldn’t dare… Valeria wouldn’t let him, she—
“Valeria?” She came to with a small start when she felt Rafael’s hand on her shoulder, looking up at him. “¿Estás bien?” he asked “¿Me has oído?” She was harder to read than the others. He couldn’t tell if she was listening intently or falling apart. Her expression hadn’t changed a bit, and that was probably one of the most concerning things he’d ever witnessed.
She gave a slow blink. “I’m sorry,” she finally said, voice soft and barely above a whisper. “What did you say?”
Olivia felt her guts coil. Between Valeria’s lack of reaction and her spacing out, she felt she might’ve been quick to judge her proficiency. She directed a quick look to Rafael, eyes speaking silently her concerns. “We… Well, just… We can see about getting some Unis to patrol for a while, just until—“
“No,” Valeria interrupted quickly, standing from her seat on weak legs, but still managing to hold herself steadfast. “No, no, that won’t be necessary. I can handle it.” She had to. For herself, for Isabella. Push it down. Force a smile. “Thanks for the heads up. I appreciate it, but I should get back to work.”
Olivia stood, mouth open to speak, but Valeria was already out the door. She exhaled as she watched her go, shaking her head gently. “I…” Another exhale, looking a Barba.
Rafael nodded. There was no need for words. “Go home,” he insisted. “Get Noah to the doctor. Your squad will be fine.” An exchange of soft smiles and a pat on her back as they both exited the office. They walked quietly side by side for a while until his eyes found Valeria by the coffee station, his steps slowing to a halt. He couldn’t see her distress, but he could see it. It wasn’t visible, but it was there. He wasn’t a therapist or a psychiatrist. And yet…
He sent Olivia ahead, taking a detour to stop by Valeria. “Hey.”
With everything running through her mind, she momentarily forgot aversion toward Barba. But as burdened as she was with new knowledge, she was still hardheaded. “Just because you were nice for a bit doesn’t mean I’m gonna be nice back,” Valeria stated snidely. “And I’m still not apologizing.”
It was a diversion and he knew that, but it still tickled him. “Terco como una mula,” Rafael murmured, leaning against the coffee station.
“Bite me.” She sipped her coffee.
A roll of his eyes. “Alright, I know it’s gonna be a little difficult for you, but let’s just call a truce for second,” he proposed. He dropped his own attitude. “How much do you know about Connor Davis? His past, I mean.”
She shook her head as she took another sip, hardly flinching as the liquid scalded her mouth. “I looked into the old cases on him when I was in vice. People don’t talk as quietly as they think, and I heard my name pop up with Connor’s a number of times.”
Sounded about right. “Then you know why Liv and I want to place Unis for a while.”
Valeria rolled her eyes. “It’s not happening,” she defied once more, less respectfully. She marched back to her desk. “I didn’t push myself through self defense classes, the academy, and vice for the past decade to have to rely on other people to protect me.”
“A little short of a decade on the force and you still don’t understand that that’s exactly how the job goes?” He grinned at her scowl, following her to the desk. “Listen, you don’t want Unis. That’s fine. But I want you to at least keep in consideration coming to me if you do need something.” Valeria’s bewilderment was to be expected. She hardly needed words to get her thoughts across. “Just— Anyone who knows his case with you is more than positive that he’s guilty of the two before, and as much as I’d like to put that cabrón away for those murders, I don’t want it to be because he made you his third kill.”
That… That was the last thing she expected from Rafael. Then again, she didn’t really know him. She judged him based on a little mishap that happened on a day where her own emotions were off the charts. Oh… Oh, gross. Valeria felt the guilt settle in. She pursed her lips as she looked down at the papers on her desk, giving a small nod. “I get it,” she acknowledged. She sighed, picking her head back up again and offering the smallest smile, laced with a faint color of relief from the fear she pushed down. “Thank you. I’ll keep it in mind.”
There it was. Faint, but real. He mirrored the smile, pulling a small card from his blazer pocket. “In case you need to reach me.” His grin grew when she took the card and stared at the number. “That’s not an invitation for a ‘You up’ text, by the way,” he teased.
Valeria’s eyes widened at the insinuation, and she scoffed. “You wish,” she retorted, dropping the card on the desk and picking up her coffee. “But I’m not surprised the only action you get is in court.” Thank God he was already turned away when he chuckled. Seeing her blush would’ve only given him more ammo against her.
She watched him turn out of the squad room and continued to stare for a moment after until Carisi moved into her line of sight with a knowing grin. “What?” Sonny waggled his brows, pulling another scoff and an eye roll. Valeria took her coffee, and the card, to the break room
Valeria Castillo comes back to SVU after ten years. Only this time, she’s not a victim. Instead, she’s now a detective, on a mission to help other victims obtain the justice they deserve. But what happens when her own abuser is set loose with a blood lust? It’s open season, and Valeria is marked.
Content Rating/Warnings: Mature Audiences (MA) - Adult content, violence, sexual themes, strong foul language, alcohol/drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of rape
Pairing: Rafael Barba x Valeria Castillo (OC)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
To be continued…
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
A/N: So, I’ve kinda gone down a SVU rabbit hole lol I started the series about a month and a half ago, and now I’m already halfway through season 18. It has been a RIDE. And in case it wasn’t evident by the amateur collage, I kinda got a thing for Rafael Barba. ^^’ But can you blame me? I mean, look at him. If you don’t agree, you’re wrong. /j ANYWAY lol There’s no particular time placement of this story. Things to keep in mind are: Detective Elliot Stabler, Captain Donald Cragen, and Sergeant John Munch have long since retired, Detective Nick Amaro has already left to California, Sergeant Mike Dodds has passed away, and Olivia Benson is Lieutenant, reason being that this is as far as I’ve gotten in the show itself. Now I can’t promise consistent updates, but I promise that whatever I do post, whenever I post it, it will be well worth the read (I hope!). Thank you for taking an interest in my story!
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DISCLAIMER: Marked is only posted Tumblr and AO3! I do not post on any other platforms!
Rafael, however, was more or less pleasantly surprised, smiling with amusement. She was hard to forget, for sure. At first, when he saw her outside, he admittedly thought she was a collar let out on bail. She looked the part, but it was evident that looks could be deceiving. “Actually, I believe we’ve already met,” he mused, eyes never wavering from Valeria.
“You— You have?” Olivia’s brows furrowed, confused.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Thursday, May 12th, 10:02AM
Months of calm in the precinct were far and few between, but they were never unwelcome, especially after the harder cases. It was hard to want to do anything after a bad ending, no matter how many times anyone denied needing any break, but it was only ever apparent in the lack of energy in the squad room. And you just knew it was a rough patch when Carisi wasn’t even cracking any jokes. But as with anything damaged, it would only take time to fix.
And a new face never hurt. It was a little easier to forget the gloom and doom in the squad room when no one was there, but the reality always set in again when they stepped back in, but as Olivia figured, a fresh detective to train and show the ropes should busy everyone enough to keep them out of their own minds.
She stepped just outside of her office, shoulders squared, yet relaxed as she addressed her subordinates. “Hey, guys, I just want to remind you that we have a new body coming in from vice,” she reminded. “I’ll be in a one-on-one meeting with Barba when she comes in, so, Fin, I want you take charge of making sure she settles in comfortably.”
Amanda perked up at the mention of a new detective. Another woman, at that. “It’s about time,” she chirped, shifting her focus from her paperwork. “We’ve been needing more of a woman’s touch around here.”
Fin gave a glare of faux offense from across their desks. “Damn. After all this time together, that’s how you feel?” He was answered with a shrug and a grin, a smirk playing across his face.
“Do we get to know who she is or is it a surprise?” Sonny chimed in.
A blank expression laid over Olivia’s face before it fell into mild frustration and embarrassment. It was clear she needed a break, but knowing her, she wouldn’t take one unless forced. “Yeah, sorry. Her name is Valeria Castillo.”
Fin did a double take, brows raised high in disbelief. “Not that Valeria Castillo, right?”
Olivia nodded with a half grin. “That Valeria Castillo,” she confirmed before retreating back into her office.
Between her lieutenant’s and trusted partner’s knowing reactions of surprise, it was clear that this Valeria person was someone really good, or really bad. Either way, she was someone worth noting. “Wait, who’s Valeria?” Amanda asked curiously, eyes fixed on Fin, but still aware as Sonny approached to join in on conversation.
“Ten years ago, Munch and I took on a DV case,” Fin began to explain. “Sweet girl, twenty-one years old, living with her boyfriend who turned out to be a scumbag. Beat her, raped her, isolated her from friends and family. She only got the courage to report it after her mom was in rehab for the hundredth time and her baby sister had nowhere to go.”
“And she wasn’t about to have that kind’a thing around her baby sister,” Sonny assumed, confirmed by Fin by a nod of his head.
“How did that case go?”
“Smooth sailing. We avoided a trial altogether. She documented everything, left nothing out, her story was consistent. That piece of shit never knew what him.” More admirable was how Valeria now chose to make a career out of making sure other victims got their justice as well. She already fit right in with Olivia and Amanda.
“Wow,” Amanda breathed with a half smile, leaning back in her chair. “Hardened by trauma and vice? Sounds to me like we got a firecracker coming our way.” Not that it bothered her any. The distasteful thought that Valeria’s attitude would be more aimed toward men momentarily crossed her mind.
Sonny nodded, trekking over to pour himself a cup of coffee. “‘Castillo’,” he said aloud. “Sounds Puerto Rican. That might add to that firecracker attitude.”
“Did you just stereotype someone’s attitude based off their ethnicity?” Rafael only managed to catch the tail end of the conversation, mainly Sonny’s remark. “Carisi, I’m surprised at you.” Of course he knew it was only banter and Sonny didn’t mean anything bad by it. Sonny wasn’t exactly the brightest crayon in the box when it came to social propriety, but he was a good man regardless. Rafael just enjoyed busting his chops every once in a while. Seeing the usually overconfident man stutter and stumble over his words to try and save face, he dropped the scowl, letting it morph into a facetiously smug smile. He landed a heavy pat on Carisi’s back once he relaxed a bit before heading off toward Olivia’s office.
Amanda and Fin chuckled under their breaths at the exchange. “Man, you just got the worst luck,” Fin teased. “Always making a fool of yourself in front of your crush.” He laughed just a little bit harder when Sonny flipped him the bird.
•••••••••••••••
10:25AM
She just meant to have one cigarette, but she had another out of spite when that pompous prick in a pressed suit and over-gelled hair went ahead with his unsolicited comment on her first one. ‘You know those are bad for you, right?’ he’d said, flashing Valeria a smug grin. She hoped she didn’t have to work too close to whoever that jackass was.
Valeria smoked her second cigarette all the way to the filter, tossing it into the receptacle some yards away from the front door before she went in herself. Even with nicotine in her system, her nerves were on fire. The smell of the hallways, the sound of the telephones and printers, the uniforms, all brought back every piece, every memory she thought she’d repressed from a decade ago. Each step closer to the squad room admittedly terrified her, but she found a small ray of solace in knowing that Olivia Benson, her saving grace in her leap of faith, remembered her and would be there to guide her as much as she could.
The squad room had changed drastically over the course of ten years. Better tech, new paint job. New detectives. The only one she recognized on the floor was Detective Tutuola. She felt slight relief and comfort, even more so when he caught her standing at the door. “Can I help you?” he asked, standing from his desk.
The quick and frequent swap of emotions flowing through her was enough to give her whiplash. She somehow expect him to recognize her upon first glance, completely forgetting how much time had passed and how much she’d changed herself. Valeria shifted on her feet, clutching the strap of her satchel in one hand while the other drew up to her chest. “I’m the new detective, Valeria,” she introduced herself. “Valeria Castillo.” In case it could jog his memory.
Again, Fin’s eyes widened, brows raised high. She was vastly different from how he remembered her. She use to be skinnier and paler from malnourishment, her hair thin and deep brown, cut to her shoulders. No makeup back then, otherwise her then-boyfriend would accuse her of cheating and beat her senseless. Forced to be conservative.
Now she was what Fin could only assume was her true self. Curvy and tanner, hair long, full, and dyed copper. A tiny stud decorated the left side of her nose, a little hoop on her bottom lip. In addition to the tattoo on her right wrist she’d had when they first met, a sleeve covered her left arm. She was dressed and made up like she was ready for a rock concert. Definitely not your run of the mill detective, but undeniably who she was meant to be.
“Valeria Castillo,” Fin repeated, approaching her with a welcoming smile and open arms. “Damn, girl, I hardly recognized you!” Familiarity. He could sense her nerves right off the bat and wanted to ease them. She was in good company and needed to know that.
Oh, thank fuck. Valeria accepted the hug, letting out a laugh of relief. “You think I’m unrecognizable? You should see Isabella,” she quipped.
Fin pulled back, keeping a comfortable hand on her shoulder. “Ah, Isabella. How is she? She’s, what, twelve now?”
“Thirteen,” she corrected. “And she’s doing great. She’s in eighth grade, a straight-A honor roll student. I became her legal guardian not long after you, Munch, and the others helped me through everything.” Munch. Valeria noticed he wasn’t here. While she held a bit of hope that he was just taking a vacation or came in on his day off, she knew very well the more likely reality that John had retired. But then where was Detective Stabler?
Thoughts and nostalgia were interrupted when Amanda and Sonny made their approach. “Hi, I’m Amanda Rollins,” she introduced herself, extending a friendly hand. “This is Dominick Carisi.”
“But everyone calls me Sonny,” he added, taking Valeria’s hand after Amanda. He always mentally cheered when no one objected to the nickname anymore.
What had Valeria been so nervous for? Olivia told her personally that she would be taken care of, that her and Fin would be there to make sure everything went smoothly. She felt kind of guilty for not trusting in them, but the guilt was washed away by the overwhelming sense of family she felt already. “Nice to meet you guys,” she beamed. “Olivia told me great things about you.” She glanced around momentarily. “Is… Is she here?”
Sonny nodded toward the closed door. “She’s having a chat with our ADA. She should be out in a little bit.” He stepped to the side, a hand gestured toward the empty desk across from him. “Here, why don’t you get settled? Want me to grab you a drink?”
“A water, please.” She set her bag down, looking toward the office, then to Fin. “Wow. So Captain Cragen really did retire.”
Fin nodded slowly with a mildly somber smile. “Yeah, with his girlfriend,” he confirmed, leaning against Valeria’s new desk with his arms crossed over his chest. “We miss the guy every day.”
More glances around the squad room. “What about Sergeant Munch and Detective Stabler?”
“Munch moved on to bigger things. As for Stabler…”
There was a pause. One that made Valeria’s stomach continue to do flips as she feared the worst. “What happened?”
Fin sighed, eyes cast toward the floor for a moment before looking back to her. “We were gonna go to trial for a high-profile rape case, and the victim was set to testify. Unfortunately, she was shot point blank just nights before.”
“The Luke Ronson case.” How could she forget? It was all over the news.
Fin nodded and continued. “We caught everyone involved in that, had them locked up in holding. We brought Jenna Fox, the victim’s daughter, in to see that we caught them, sent her on her way, and we figured that was it, right? Well, Jenna comes back later, pulls out a gun and starts firing into the cell. Next thing any of us know, Elliot fires his, Jenna’s on the ground, and…”
He didn’t have to finish. It was apparent what happened, and it was heavy. She, Amanda, and Sonny weren’t even present for it, but they could still feel the gravity. They couldn’t imagine how Fin felt. How Elliot felt. Silence loomed over the tiny group, Valeria only nodding in thanks as Sonny handed her the bottled water. “I hope he’s okay,” she finally said, voice soft.
“I don’t doubt he is,” Amanda chimed in with gentle optimism, taking her seat by her desk. “But I’ll tell you what, he left some pretty big shoes to fill when he left.”
Sonny huffed with a smile. “Yeah, no kidding. Liv doesn’t talk about him much, but when she does, it’s nothing but high praise there.” And well-deserved.
Valeria chuckled, sipping the water. “Then I guess I can only promise I’ll do my best.”
“Valeria.”
Valeria turned her head toward the voice. She hadn’t heard the office door open as she was caught up in conversation. Seeing Olivia stand there, aged but still such a refined and dignified beauty, a smile that reached her tired eyes brought on by the simple sight of Valeria, alive and well. Warmth swelled in her chest, almost bringing tears to her eyes. “Olivia,” she breathed wistfully, taking a careful step toward her.
Olivia’s smile widened. A decade had undoubtedly changed them both, but the bond their formed within their short time together was unmistakable. She started toward her as well, arms coming out for an embrace. Valeria closed the distance with faster steps, locking Olivia into a hug. After all these years, she still smelled the same. “It’s so good to see you again, Olivia,” Valeria expressed, voice wavering with emotion.
“Oh, it’s good to see you too, honey,” Olivia stated sweetly, squeezing Valeria firmly in her arms before pulling back to look at her. “You’ve grown up so much. How are you? Your sister, your mom?”
She gave a small shrug, a rather indifferent smile as she spoke about the circumstances. “I’m Isabella’s legal guardian now. Ma couldn’t keep herself away from drugs, so I did what I had to do.” And she would do it again.
Olivia nodded in understanding. If there was anything she could understand, it was mommy issues. “Well, I’m glad you found your way after everything. And I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you transferred over here from vice. There is not a single doubt in my mind that you’re going to be a perfect fit here.”
“You might wanna prep her for Barba,” Amanda quipped with a smirk.
Valeria looked between the two, brows furrowed. “Barba?” she wondered.
Olivia rolled her eyes with an equal grin to Amanda’s. “Our ADA, Rafael Barba,” she explained in more detail. “He’s cocky, he’s smug, he’ll push you, push your buttons—“ Valeria grimaced and rolled her eyes, making Olivia laugh. “But he gets the job done. And he’s really good at what he does. You’ll get use to him, I promise.”
Valeria groaned, shoulders slumping. “As long as he’s not on one today. I’ve had my fill of douche bag already.” And it was only noon.
“Someone already pushed your buttons?” Fin probed.
“Yes.” Valeria sighed, dropping her head back. “Some pompous prick saw me smoking outside and made a snarky comment about it not being good for me, like I don’t already know.”
“So what’d you do?”
“I smoked another one out of spite.” Her annoyance melted when her newfound squad laughed, pulling a smile onto her face.
Olivia rubbed a hand on her back. “Well, I can promise he’ll behave today,” she assured with a chuckle. “He seems to be in a good mood and that usually means good moods all around. I’ll introduce you when he finishes up his phone call.” She heard footsteps behind her coming out of her office as if right on cue. “Oh. Here. Valeria, this is Rafael Barba. Counselor, this is the new detective, Valeria Castillo.”
Barely noon, and already Valeria felt probably every emotion known to man. Her good mood was soured, expression morphing from shocked to annoyed beyond a reasonable doubt when she laid eyes upon the ADA.
Rafael, however, was more or less pleasantly surprised, smiling with amusement. She was hard to forget, for sure. At first, when he saw her outside, he admittedly thought she was a collar let out on bail. She looked the part, but it was evident that looks could be deceiving. “Actually, I believe we’ve already met,” he mused, eyes never wavering from Valeria.
“You— You have?” Olivia’s brows furrowed, confused.
“Yeah, the pompous prick,” Valeria reminded of the just had conversation. She stared daggers, her tone sharper and dripping with venomous disdain. She knew things were going too well today. It was only a matter of time before she was pushed off her cloud.
Oh, she had some spice. Rafael was use to it with Olivia. He wondered how much more Valeria had than her, just judging by her current demeanor. His grin grew. “Did you think about what I told you outside?” he asked, smug as ever.
Hands went on her hips to keep them from balling into fists and flying. Valeria’s blood was already boiling. “I did, actually,” she retorted with a wry smile. “And I’ve come to the conclusion that you can take it and shove it up your ass, if you can even get it past the stick you have lodged in there—“
“Okay, alright. Valeria, why don’t you keep getting settled at your desk?” Olivia guided Valeria away, casting a quick glare back toward Rafael. Her eyes bounced between her other detectives with a warning glare as they tried to conceal their shocked laughter. There was that firecracker attitude Amanda aforementioned.
Rafael was smiling wide now. He’d had witnesses and victims say things very similar to him, but never a detective. And rather than setting her straight, he figured he would play into this one. Why? Well, as smart as he was, not even he could tell you. “I look forward to working with you,” Rafael mused, catching her glare just before he turned to leave.
A second set of footsteps joined with his just outside the squad room. “Barba, listen, I know you’ve never done it before, but I’m asking you as a friend and as a lieutenant looking out for my squad to just go easy on Valeria.” She immediately held up a hand to stop Barba from protesting. “I swear I will keep her in line. Just, for now, at least pretend that you’re not always a jerk. For me.”
Rafael slowed to a stop, staring at her with a wondering smile. Now he was all sorts of curious and intrigued. Olivia had asked many things from him, but never a personal ask like this. “Is there some kind of personal history here?” he inquired as he continued to walk at a slower pace.
“In a sense. She came to us ten years ago as a victim. It’s not a long story, but—“
“Send me the case file, I’ll take a look at it.” Chismoso. He couldn’t help it sometimes. “Whatever it is, it won’t interfere with her abilities to work, will it?”
Olivia shook her head emphatically. “Not at all. She was with vice for seven years, they all only ever had good things to say about her.”
Save for the bad attitude, apparently. “Alright.” He pushed the elevator call button, waiting not very long for the doors to open and stepped inside. “On that note, I appreciate you taking the time to see me, Liv. We’ll keep in touch.” They parted with a smile, the elevator doors closing.
On the short ride down, Rafael found himself thinking an awful lot about Valeria. She looked so familiar, the name only adding to it. He swore he knew her somehow, it was right there in that blind spot of his mind. Yet he just couldn’t place her. All that came back around was her sneer and smartass remark, still bringing an amused grin to his face.
Shae left the food to simmer on the stovetop before joining the three men in the kitchen. Her dog and Nick seemed to be getting along perfectly, meanwhile Daryl was wandering the room, browsing her decor.
She joined Kandomere on the couch, sitting at the opposite end. Despite how great it was to see him, she couldn’t help but feel a bit of dread deep in her gut. To be fair, how they left off wasn’t the best, and she’d never planned on seeing him again. Crazy how life works, isn’t it?
“So, what happens if you find Nadia and Akila?” Shae dared to ask. She had a feeling there wouldn’t be much they could tell her, but with her work background with Kandomere, maybe he’d give just a bit.
He watched her silently, his frame unmoving but senses always on a swivel, but every one of those was focused on Shae, at the moment. Although it was easier to talk past the lump in his throat he’d felt since stepping into her place, he was still overtaken by her presence, as he always had been. When she placed herself at the opposite end of the couch, he suddenly felt the distance that had been between them for all this time- how had he gone so long without even speaking to her? He cleared his throat. “They’ll be charged and likely be imprisoned, but I can’t talk specifics if they receive harsher punishments,” he explained, meeting her eyes.
“What about the wand?”
Daryl’s body stiffened at the mention. He could say he trusted in Kandomere’s judgement enough to believe Shae wouldn’t be part of any Inferni business, but let’s be real. This man was more pessimistic than he’d ever been before, considering his newly found ability and last run in with Inferni. Daryl turned slightly, eyebrow raised as he looked between Shae and Kandomere. “What about it?”
”Wands are ancient weapons forged from the Dark Lord- only he can truly vanquish them. There has never been a method discovered that effectively destroys them, so we keep them in centers like the ones Nadia and Akila infiltrated,” Kandomere looked to Ward when he spoke. “For now, we can only keep them contained and away from the world as best as possible,” he exhaled, knowing full well how brittle of a solution that was, but it was realistically their only solution. Whatever evil may come knocking on the door, it was his job to keep that door locked.
Shae looked down at her hands, picking at her nails. As much as she hated being that person, she knew Kandomere wouldn’t come up with a plan for all possibilities. “What if it’s too late?” she asked, tone lowered.
That caught Nick’s attention, a pit of nerves forming in his gut. “What do you mean?”
”Girl, that fucking prick at the mercado was giving me a hard time again-“ The door swung open and in stepped a shorter woman with dark, straight hair to her chin and hazel eyes, paper bag full of food and booze in one arm and her sunglasses in the other, looking at each individual face.
“Oh.” She first took notice of the two officers in uniform. When the blue haired elf caught her eye though, the match was made in her head, realization dawning on her. “Oh. I’ve interrupted something,” she winced, looking at Shae apologetically.
His brows pulled together in mild annoyance at the human’s rude entrance. “Who is this?” Kandomere pointed to her, looking to Shae.
Shae dropped her head forward as she snorted a laugh. “This is Rita,” she introduced. “I told you about Rita before.” Shae stood, helping her friend with the groceries. “Rita, you remember Kandomere. And this is Officers Daryl award and Nick Jakoby. Remember the whole wand thing a couple years back?”
Daryl quickly stepped forward. “That was all just a rumor,” he added quickly.
Shae rolled her eyes. “Please, I was MTF for years, I know this works.”
”Oh, I definitely remember Kandomere.” Rita stuck her chin up a little, keeping her big eyes on his scowl until she’d passed. “Nice to meet you,” she nodded and smiled kindly at Ward as she passed, but upon moving closer to the tuskless Orc, she let her eyes linger on his kind face, taking in the way he timidly made himself known around the room. Her heart throbbed a little. “It’s nice to meet you,” she looked at his badge. “Officer Jakoby,” she grinned, following Shae away.
Nick’s eyes followed after Rita. “Uh… I, uh…” His words were lost to him, taken aback by her sweet demeanor.
Meanwhile Kandomere looked on in exasperation. “She knows?” he implored.
She sighed roughly. “Yes, she knows,” Shae confirmed. “She was the only one there for me when shit went down.” Not just the recent events of the past few years. in all fairness, that didn’t really involve Shae at all. No, Rita was there for Shae from the very start of her Bright revelation, ten, long years ago.
Ward looked between Shae, Rita, and Kandomere. “How much does she know?”
Shae crossed her arms over her chest, looking guilty. Even though she didn’t work for them anymore, it could still mean trouble. “She knows as much as I do,” she admitted, then looked to Kandomere. “All of it.”
Rita looked on calmly, silently unpacking the paper bag and placing the assorted snacks and drinks on the counter. It was really her fault this was an issue now; she’d made the decision to come over unannounced, but this was truly the last thing she expected to find sitting in her friend’s home when all she thought would come of this day was booze, gossip and too much food.
Kandomere looked at Rita, both of their steely glares meeting. Ah, yes- I remember this one, he recalled bitterly.
This wasn’t how things were supposed to be done, but his plan of action to keep the wand safe had been laid out like a drunk. Rules didn’t feel so important to follow when he was desperate to resolve the danger, which meant not taking this liability in and questioning her until she broke. She’d held the delicate information all this time with no incident, so for now, he had no real reason not to trust her.
His eyes shot to Shae. I can trust her judgement, at least.
“Fine. She can stay.” He paused to point at Rita. “You speak a word of this to anyone and I will lock you away from daylight for the remainder of your life,” he threatened.
Rita held her hands up. “I already pink swore to Shae that I wouldn’t tell anyone,” she grinned sarcastically.
Daryl ran his hand over his face, doing his damnedest to keep his frustration down. “Alright, so what now?” he asked impatiently. “We just get a search party going for those two crazy ass elves?”
“And what about what Shae said?” Nick added. “What if we’re too late?”
Kandomere paused, looking at all their faces when the grim question was brought up. “If he comes back, I don’t know what we could do to stop him,” he sighed, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He knew that news would not sit well with them just as it didn’t with him, but keeping them in the dark that any efforts they made could be pointless didn’t sit right with him, either.
“But we may have a chance to prevent it from happening if you help us, Shae.” He looked to her again, his silver eyes pleading. “You two are the only Brights I have,” he realized the same moment he said it.
Rita’s brows lifted high in surprise, glancing at Shae as she poured them drinks. Too late? she thought to herself, her anxiety stirring under her calm exterior.
Shae nodded gently. “In my experience since knowing I was a Bright, I can feel some kind of... force, I guess, when Magic is used.” She glanced over to Daryl. “That’s how I know the Wand being a rumor was bullshit.”
Nick perked up considerably. “So, you have some kind of sixth sense?” Despite the absolute trauma and horror experienced in just one night with Leilah, he just couldn’t bring himself to think that Magic was anything but cool.
A humble shrug. “Something like that,” Shae confirmed.
”That exact sense of yours can help us locate where they might be collecting, but I’m sure they’re anticipating that. We’d have to be clever about this, if you’re willing to help us.”
Rita grinned when noticing Nick pipe up, sipping her drink and leaned against the counter. “What’s in it for Shae, though?” she asked, looking head on at Kandomere.
”That’s none of your business,” he replied coldly. It baffled him to think he wouldn’t compensate her for the tremendous danger ahead, but how selfish would he sound if he admitted a larger part of him wanted her to help just so he didn’t feel so alone in this matter? MTF never looked good from the outside, he realized that, but having someone he was once close with know the struggles from the inside eased some of the qualms in his heart.
Shae held up her hands, shaking her head. “I don’t need anything,” she assured. “I’m doing just fine.”
Define fine. Shae had gone from living in an Elf Town penthouse, working as a well-known, well-respected Magic Task Force agent and partnered with the only elf to ever catch her fancy, to working as a bartender and den mother at a local strip club.
Sure, she was doing fine, but it wasn’t what she expected for herself.
”Don’t be so humble, Shae,” Rita whispered under her breath at her friend, checking to make sure no one had heard her.
He rolled his eyes. Humans really are naive. “She’s right, you have every right to name your price,” Kandomere stubbornly agreed, annoyed that once again he’d been interrupted before he could say the same thing. “But you’ll help us?” he asked again. Please, please, please, Shae.
She didn’t hesitate to nod. “Of course, I will.”
All of this felt wrong to Daryl. This girl just happened to know the two elves that stole the wand, and she had no affiliation with them in this? It was too convenient, too easy.
Kandomere concealed his sigh of relief but felt it wash over him. “Thank you, Shae. And I’m sorry. I didn’t expect to be barging in like this,” he apologized, glancing down to adjust the sleeve of his coat. There was no denying he felt peace just being in her presence, that already he felt like this impossible mission of theirs might actually be possible.
“Honestly, it’s not a big deal,” Shae insisted, waving a hand dismissively. She glanced over toward the stove, doing a double take as she remembered the food was still simmering. “Ready to eat?” she asked, turning off the stovetop flames.
Nick sauntered over to the kitchen. “It smells great,” he complimented. “Need help setting the table?”
Shae smiled brightly. “I would appreciate that.”
Kandomere watched Shae, observing as she smiled and spoke to the Orc… He should’ve been the one to stand and offer help. Fool, you’re just sitting here, he belittled himself, crossing his legs in annoyance, tugging the end to his coat again. God forsaken fool.
Rita looked over her shoulder when Nick approached, slyly watching him from the corner of her eye when she leaned on the counter opposite to stand beside Shae. For a big thing like him he was awfully agile.
“When did he come back?” she whispered to Shae, her mouth hidden behind her cup as she silently observed the men around them. “Did he even call?!” she hissed a little heatedly, looking at her with curious eyes.
Shae sighed softly, shaking her head as she loaded up the plates with food. “Him and the officers came this morning to question me,” she told her friend. “Remember those girls I told you about? The ones I went to college with?” She felt uneasy, but continued when Rita nodded. “Apparently, they went Inferni,” she said bitterly. “When they’d asked me for help with a recent project, I’m guessing it was to help steal back the Wand from MTF archives.”
Her eyes grew wide. “Are you serious!?” Rita hissed, pausing as she came to better understand the gravity of the situation she’d stumbled into, and looked at Shae in wonder. How did she so willingly agree to help them? Without any hesitation?
“Are you sure you wanna get involved in this?” she asked Shae, taking a half step closer.
Kandomere couldn’t hear over the clattering of the plates being filled or the Orc setting the table, but the way her friend would glance back put him on edge, in addition fueling the urge to get up and try to walk over as nonchalantly as possible and place himself at the table to better hear, but every move he made felt stiff, and too thought out.
Shae paused when serving up the last plate, an almost far off stare in her eyes. “I know how this looks, Rita. I know it’s suspicious. Hell, Officer Ward has been giving me dirty looks all night.” A soft smile graced her features. “But, if I’m being honest, I missed doing this kind of work. I was a damn good agent. Things just couldn’t work. But just because I’m a Bright doesn’t mean I agree with any of this ‘raising the Dark Lord’ crap that the Inferni got in their heads.” She glanced back toward Kandomere at the table. “I want that as much as I wanted to never see him again,” she inadvertently thought out loud.
The moment her eyes met his he didn’t want her to pull away. There’s so much I want to talk to you about, he wanted to tell her. But now, was not that day. With her helping though, maybe it could come soon.
Rita nodded, understanding the longing she spoke of now the same way she did when she’d recall it other times, but also deeply understood the complexity of having Kandomere involved, and the emotions that must’ve come with it. “As long as you’re sure, I trust your judgement. I just want you to be okay.” She bumped her elbow against Shae’s.
The soft bump brought Shae back to reality. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t think about Kandomere often, especially now that he was back in her life. There was so much to tell him. Not now, she thought to herself, opting to smile instead as she brought plates to the table.
He stood with a low grunt, fixing his coat before approaching the table to find a seat. He watched the others move around, picking a chair to pull out as she placed the plates down. “So, how have things been?” Kandomere asked her, desperate to hear if she’d been as plagued with loneliness as he, but also hopeful to hear that she was thriving.
Rita came to meet Shae at the counter before the last two plates were delivered, gently stopping her hand. “Let me take these ones, yeah?” she whispered with a coy smile, gesturing over towards the Orc cop with mischief in her big eyes.
“They’ve been,” Shae answered Kandomere, just barely catching her friend’s subliminal message. Christ alive, Rita was into the orc. She chuckled quietly to herself, watching her friend take the plates and go make a move on Nick. “Titty bar down the way is picking up traction, so the money’s good. It’s been amazing nannying the neighborhood kids and watching them grow up. Honestly, it makes me want one of my own.”
Kandomere’s brows jumped in surprise at the mention of her wanting children, but did it really surprise him, being the way she was with everyone? Of course she would be a good mother. “That’s good, I’m glad to hear you’re doing well.” He gave her a small grin. “You haven’t had any trouble living here?”
Shae scrunched her nose. “Well, not anymore, at least.” She kept it very vague, not wanting to set off any alarms with anyone. “Everyone has been lovely nowadays.”
He twisted his utensil in his food, catching that small little detail. “’Anymore’?” he repeated in question, looking at her. His fist rested at the tables surface, clenched. What kind of harassment had she endured? The mere thought she had endured any at all was enough to anger him.
“It’s nothing. Everything’s fine now.”
Even more like Shae... No one was allowed to worry about her. She always believed there were bigger fish to fry, putting whatever she was going through on the bottom of everyone’s list. Kandomere nodded, looking down at his plate to take a bite. “it’s very good,” he grinned at her around his mouthful.
She hummed with a soft smile. “I remember how you like it.”
Kandomere smiled, a little bashfully. Nothing really had changed about her, had it? The kindness was still warm on her, the peace she emitted calming the wildest of his nerves that had been ringing since this all started. He wished he could stay in this bubble, without any of the dangerous obligations he’d have to return to.
Bu the more the two spoke, the more Daryl realized what their history was or might’ve been. And the more he realized that, the more he was uncomfortable with the situation. All of this could end very poorly for everyone.
Daryl approached Kandomere in the living after they’d all eaten, using the opportunity of Shae busying herself with cleanup and Nick speaking with Rita outside to voice his concerns. “You sure this is a good idea, man?” he questioned, eyes on Shae, voice low so she couldn’t hear him. “None of this seems any kind of wrong to you?”
The agent looked to the officer, turning slowly so his back was to Shae and pretending to be observing the room around them. “None of this feels right, but we don’t have the time to do this by the rules. She’s strong, she’s trustworthy, and you two together are our best shot against the Inferni,” he replied quietly, glancing over his shoulder to make sure their conversation had not been detected.
“How do we know she’s not part of that shit?” Daryl challenged. “Just take her word for it? You haven’t seen this girl in years, you don’t know what could’ve changed.” He wasn’t wrong. That could be a possibility, but then again, it just didn’t make any sense.
“Why would an elf that was Inferni willingly live in an orc neighborhood such as this? For cover? Inferni don’t do that, Officer. They do their business in broad daylight, I’m sure you remember,” Kandomere noted, looking at him critically.
Daryl scoffed. “Yeah, well, maybe after getting their asses handed to them by an orc and a human, they started taking some precautions.”
“There’s no denying that,” Kandomre half grinned. “But I truly think we’ll only benefit from having her on our side. She’s well versed in my side of the line and is- was an excellent agent.” It was almost painful to have to correct himself like that. “She also has insight you might find helpful.”
“Hey, hey, you got a lot of nerve thinking I’m gonna be doing any Magic shit,” he said lowly, holding a warning finger up to Kandomere. “I’m doing my job as a police officer. She can keep that Magic shit to herself, alright? I’m good.”
The small pool illuminated the dark damp room, surrounded by Inferni men and women, a low, harmonic chant echoing through. The light pulsed as their Magic grew stronger, their power coming together for one sole purpose. A form of water lifted from the pool, moulding and meshing into a humanoid form. Chants became louder, Magic became stronger. The water became solid, a body of a man forming inside before the water dripped off. Red, dark eyes opened. He was here. He was risen.
It was hard to not hear the conversation. They seemed to forget that elves have heightened senses, but she wasn’t going to make a scene of it. It sucked that Daryl didn’t trust her, but she didn’t blame him. She did, however, find solace that, even after all these years, Kandomere still trusted her. Shae’s thoughts were intruded by a sharp sting of something electric coursing through her body. She gasped sharply, falling to her knees and dropping dishes, shattering.
Just as he was about to respond to Ward’s dismissal, the sudden crashing of plates snapped his head in Shae’s direction, finding her on her knees in the kitchen. Panic flooded him, and he was at her side quicker than the flap of a hummingbird’s wing. “Shae!? Are you alright!?” he asked, mindful of the shattered plates but kneeling down before her to hold her shoulders.
She wasn’t the type to scare easily. Unsettle, maybe, but she was never known to fear anything.
But the look in her eyes as they met Kandomere’s, the way her body trembled. Full of terror. She knew this feeling on a much smaller scale, but this? This was big.
It was him.
It took a moment for Daryl to realize. “Shit...” he hissed, speeding toward the door for Nick.
Kandomere needn’t ask to know this look in her eye, and the chills it sent down his body were enough to make him want to run and not look back, but this was his disaster to handle. “He’s back, isn’t he?” he whispered, as if uttering the words would summon him to that very spot.
Tears filled her eyes, but she wouldn’t let them fall. Now was not the time to cry. She nodded, gripping his sleeves as she tried to stand shakily. “And he’s close.”
”Can you tell which direction he’s in?” he asked as he helped her stand, adrenaline rising in his veins and pulling his phone out, ready to make the call to Montehugh.
“I have no idea,” she said regrettably. “But I can feel his power.” Her arms wrapped around herself, finding whatever comfort she possibly could. “This is bad, Kandomere… We thought Leilah was a hard one when we were working on that case, but we’ve never encountered anything like this.”
He swallowed. Fuck, how had they succeeded so fast!? He’d been a fool to think they had time, and now realized he’d mishandled the time that was now up. “I need to make a call.” He withdrew his hand from Shae’s shoulder, lingering at her eyes before stepping away and dialing Montehugh.
Rita stormed in with Nick, their moment of content flipping on its head when Daryl summoned them. ”What’s going on? Are you okay?” she asked, taking Kandomere’s place at Shae’s side. She tried to read her, but that look on her face… she’d never seen that one before. “What happened?”
“They did it,” Nick answered before Shae could. “He’s back.”
Shae was lost in her own mind, everything else around her hardly comprehensible. She watched Kandomere walk away, eyes lingering. Why did it have to be like this? Everything that happened to date was just one big spiral that didn’t seem to have a bottom and nothing to grab onto. She’d already agreed to help, but now that it was all happening, she didn’t know what to do.
Kandomere stepped onto the balcony where Officer Jakoby and Callie once sat, a hand on his chest and struggling to even the panicked breaths he didn’t want the others to see. He pressed the phone to his ear and waited only briefly before Montehugh picked up, answering with a casual, “What’s up, boss?”
“I need all warehouses and abandoned structures within a 10 mile radius of my location swept for the Wand and any activity from Inferni,” he snapped, his eyes roaming the horizon of East LA.
He paused. “Y-you got it… what’s going on?” he asked hesitantly, but the tone of Kandomere’s voice only brought a great sense of dread.
He almost laughed. How do you deliver news that the entirety of the city- of the fucking world was under a catastrophic threat? How do you even comprehend that?! “We we’re too late, Ulysses,” he spoke forlornly, pulling his hand down his face. “They brought him back.”
Silence took the place of any words, because silence was all that occupied his mind. It wasn’t just that this was the worst case scenario, it was that all the hard work they’d done to prevent this had all been for nothing. It honestly left him kind of pissed off. “I’ll uh, I’ll get to those sweeps right now, Boss, he replied, ending the call.
Daryl huffed, staring daggers at Shae. “What a coincidence, right?” And he left it at that, leaving the apartment and going back to the car, ringing his wife on his cellphone.
Nick watched Daryl go, frustration building toward his partner’s attitude. “He doesn’t mean it, Shae,” he assured. “All of this Magic stuff has him on edge.”
Rita turned and scoffed in disgust at Ward’s sour words and sudden exit. “What an ass!” she yelled at his departure, looking back at Shae with brows arched in anger. “Don’t listen to that nonsense.”
She could only shake her head. Again, Shae didn’t blame Ward for his attitude toward her. Honestly it was expected, but she had bigger things to worry about. “I need a minute,” she croaked, breaking away from the two mindlessly walking off toward the bathroom down the hall.
Kandomere looked down at the phone after Montehugh ended the call, his hand dropping to his side and face lifting to take in a little of the sunshine warming his pale cheeks. He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. He needed moments of silence like this to retreat to when shit would eventually hit the fan. He turned to step inside, following Shae with his eyes when she exited the room.
Nick grumbled under his breath, rubbing a hand over his forehead before turning to Kandomere. “What now, boss?”
He stopped beside Jakoby. “For now, we wait to see what Montehugh’s sweep turns up. We don’t know where to start until we have something to go off of,” he explained, again looking in the direction Shae left, but then looking to the front door. “He left?” He asked Nick, his blue brows furrowing.
“Unless he’s walking home, no. Just stepped out.” He shook his head. “He’s not a fan of this. His cooperation with Shae is going to be rocky.”
”He has no choice but to cooperate.” Kandomere said through tight teeth, leaving Nick with a cold glare before following the direction Shae left in, and down the hall.
He quietly approached the only door that was closed in the hall, pausing before gently tapping his knuckles against the door. “Shae? Are you alright?” He called to her softly.
She was hunched over the sink, her head in her hands. You’d think her years of MTF training would’ve prepared her for this. Then again, it had been years longer that she was away from said job. “Yeah,” she called back, voice rough. “Yeah, I’m good.”
Ynshael… Shae jumped at the whispering voice, looking around the bathroom as if someone else was there. No one else was.
”Are you sure?” he asked, shifting to the other side of the door frame. “Listen... I know it’s been too long since we’ve spoke, but I’m still here for you if you need me. To talk, I mean.” Kandomere spoke sincerely, wanting nothing more to see her face when he told her, but the door remained shut. “Shae?”
She pressed her hands to her temples, taking deep breaths to calm herself. First the Inferni, now she’s hearing voices? Fuck this shit. Deep down, she regretted offering her help, but there was no going back.
Once she’d shaken the impending dread, Shae cleaned herself up a bit before heading toward the door. “I’m okay, I just-“ She gasped again as she opened the door, not expecting Kandomere to be so close. Her smaller body bumped into his, her hands grabbing his arms to regain stability. “Ay, Dios mío,” she breathed in a startled tone.
With a loud exhale, Rita reached for the bottle she’d brought with, pouring the cold drink to the brim of her glass. She felt like she should’ve called family to check up on them, but the lack of volcanos erupting and the ground not splitting beneath their feet gave her some reassurance that disaster hadn’t come so abruptly. “Want one?” She asked Nick, tilting her cup in his direction and her smile knocked down a few amps.
He shook his head, holding up his hands. “No, thank you. I don’t drink on the job.” Oh, sweet summer child.
She giggled. “Doesn’t seem to matter much at this point, but suit yourself, Officer,” she toasted at him with a grin, taking a few hearty sips of the drink. I’m not leaving this world sober if I can help it.
Nick chuckled softly at Rita’s banter, doing a double take toward the hall.
Kandomere hadn’t expected her to walk right into him, but that’s what he got for staring so intensely at the grain of the door while waiting for her. He grunted when she made impact, his hands flying up to hold under her elbows and look down at her. He blinked a few times; she was so close. He cleared his throat. “My apologies, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he said low, soothingly.
A soft blush dusted her cheeks when she realized how close they were. Not even when working together did they ever find themselves in each other’s arms like this, no matter how often she’d thought about it. “It’s… It’s okay, I, uh…” Her words trailed off as she looked up at him, eyes meeting. Christ alive, she’d forgotten how beautiful this man was. His sleek blue hair, the sharp cut of his jawline and cheekbones, the piercing stare that could intimidate the worst of criminals, but so comforting to Shae. She lost herself in him.
Rita furrowed her brows at the commotion from the hall, throwing back the last of her drink and burping lowly, her eyes narrowing. Are they…? She extended her neck in her struggle to listen to their low conversation in the hall, barely landing the booze in her cup as she poured another.
Kandomere was lost in her gaze, his climbing heart rate quickening his breaths, soaking in this intimate moment with her. His bones ached from her absence... How had he gone so long without taking in her beauty? His hand raised to push back a lock of hair against her cheek, swallowing when his fingertip grazed her warm skin. He just… couldn’t pull away.
The chance was right there. All she had to do was stand on her toes and their lips would lock. It was right there. Instead, she cleared her throat, taking a step back. “I’ll, uh…” She pointed to her bed room. “I’m going to get dressed. Then we can go… do things, or… whatever we need to do.”
Kandomere nodded, taking a step back to allow her passage. “We uh, I have men sweeping the area, so right now we’ll just be waiting to see if they find anything, but we can do that elsewhere,” he told her, blinking clarity back to his vision. “I don’t want to impose.” He exited the hall to leave her to change, walking through the kitchen and living room to the front door with his eyes downcast. He wanted to stop this ridiculous flutter in his gut when he thought of her joining them; now was not the time for these long dormant sensations, or the excitement when thinking of working side by side with her again.
His own hearing was good enough to hear the full conversation. “Maybe Shae should come with us,” Nick proposed. “If they reached out to her once, they may try to do it again. And I don’t think they’ll take no for an answer this time.”
He easily picked up Nick’s voice. “I’m sure you heard him,” Kandomere told her. “And he’s right,” he added. “If they decide to make another proposal in person this time. It’s best you’re not here alone.”
Rita’s brows furrowed, looking at Nick when he spoke. “Huh?” she asked, the conversation going on in the hall only muted murmurs to her human ears.
Nick nodded, turning to Rita. “We’re gonna take Shae with us,” he explained. “A busier neighborhood, somewhere we can keep closer eyes on her with more security.”
She threw back the rest of her drink, an eye pinched shut and her throat burning, a few little coughs following. “I suppose that’s my cue to get going,” she sighed light-heartedly, moving her hair off her shoulder. “Good thing I didn’t drive,” she giggled, gathering her purse and sunglasses that were sat on the counter beside her.
Nick took a bold step forward. “Why don’t you let us take you?” he offered. “It’s getting dark. You shouldn’t be walking alone.”
Inwardly, Rita’d hoped he’d offer a ride, and secretly, she was pretty stoked she had a few extra minutes worth of that ride with the cute cop she for some reason couldn’t stop herself from getting a little flustered over when his golden eyes fell on her. “Sure!” she piped, slipping her purse onto her shoulder a little wobbly.
His ears twitched as he smiled with a nod, walking over and propping his elbow out for her to take.
“Oh, que caballero,” Rita purred, her hand sliding into the crook of his elbow, slyly squeezing the muscle of his bicep.
He had no clue what she said, but he likes how it sounded. He lead her out to the car waiting in the parking lot.
Kandomere’s frown was of mild disgust watching Callie openly flirt with the Orc, his silver eyes rolling and crossing his arms over his chest as he continued to wait, staring at the entrance to the hall. He was impatient, but for what? To get going, or just be by her side and work again?
Shae took a while in her bedroom, getting dressed to properly go outside and packing a bag or two. Her mind reeled at the moment she shared with Kandomere. It was exactly what she’d always wanted, but why did it fill her with anxiety? She tried to push past the thoughts as best she could, slipping the bags on her shoulders and heading out of the room. She dawned a pair of ripped jeans and the same shirt, now covered by a leather jacket.
He looked to the hall again when he heard her steps. He repressed how widely he really wanted to smile. She looked good. “Let me help with those,” Kandomere approached, offering a hand for one.
A soft smile as she slipped one bag off her shoulder. “If they could both go in your car, I’d appreciate that,” she requested. “I actually have my own ride I’d like to take, if that’s okay.”
He eyed her curiously as he reached for her other bag, interested in what means of transportation she had. “Sure. And what about um… Titan?” he asked, looking down at the Corso.
She looked back at Titan who wagged his tail happily, then back to Kandomere, scrunching her nose with an apologetic smile. “Back seat?”
He looked down at the kind eyed beast, nodding stiffly after sharing a few quiet moments with the dog. “I hope he doesn’t puke in cars,” he mumbled, stretching an arm out to let the dog smell his hand.
Shae smiled wide as she watched Titan take to Kandomere so quickly, bumping his nose under his hand for head pats. “Just make sure he has a window seat. He’s a good dog, very smart.” She grabbed her keys from the hook by the door. “I’ll meet you out front,” she called back as she took off for her vehicle.
He nodded, turning towards the door with Titan and the bags in tow. “Now your mother has set high standards for you and that’s what I expect, good boy,” he spoke to the dog, opening the front door. “Please, stay close to us on the road… whatever method you’re taking,” he told Shae before stepping into the hall. He looked up and down; they must be at the cars already.
Nick helped Rita into the back seat, scooting in next to her, as Daryl already took the front passenger. Daryl looked back at the two, then forward toward Kandomere as he brought down bags and the dog. “Where’s Cortez?” he asked.
Kandomere walked beside the trunk of his car and pressed the button, the hatch popping up. “She said she’d ride separately,” he told him, moving to the side to let the dog in the car. “Good thing too, there’s no space left,” he grunted.
”Titan! Ven, ven hermoso!” Rita called cheerily, patting her lap to get the dog to jump in. “You like dogs, right?” she asked Nick.
He smiled wide. “I love them!” He joined Rita in giving Titan all the attention he deserved.
Daryl grunted in response, looking back out the window. He did a double take when a sleek, red Kawasaki motorcycle pulled toward them. “You gotta be kidding me,” he grumbled.
Shae pulled up next to the car, lifting up the visor on her helmet so her face was visible to Kandomere. “I’ll have somewhere to park this, right? Wherever you’re taking me?”
He looked out, slack jawed and staring at the rocket between her legs. “Yeah, yeah there’s parking,” he nodded, his line of sight bouncing up and down between her and the bike. “I have to take your friend home first though,” he gestured to the back seats and the fools ogling the dog.
She nodded understandingly. “No worries, as long as she knows where I’ll be staying.”
He nodded, turning the engine over to the sleek car and pulling onto the street. He looked in his rear view mirror, pressing the button for Titan’s window to lower so he could stick his head out.
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Art by: @margaritamamaaa
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