set it all on fire child

✿ Callie | 20 | Michigan ✿ she was gay again, as gay as ever

[delusion-of-negation]

Results so far

[jujuoh]

ok so our titty choices are now: cubism, jpeg, manga, and Picasso’s Blue Period

[antiandrogen]

mood

[suck-mein-pokeballs]

I’ve been in Tumblr long enough to go from the girl to the old man

[chongoblog]

I hate this website because I heard “Thinking Out Loud” by Edward Sheeran and all I could think about was that one fucking video you know the one

[drsupermonk]

Hey bud the hint only made me more confused

[chongoblog]

I’m so honored I get to share this with you

[gaypeopletwitter]

[wokeuplaughing]

yall remember taking “am i gay” quizzes when you were 11

[wokeuplaughing]

quiz: have you thought about kissing the same gender before

me: ya

quiz: have you ever wanted to get romantically involved with the same gender

me: ya

quiz: you are gay

me:

[tallwife]

Voldemort Roleplay 18+

Ah, ‘ello there… Would you like to join me for a cuppa tea? 

[neenarchive]

‘ello mister voldemort gov’na two sugars please! could u say a little somefing for my yewchube channel?

[tallwife]

Voldemort’s smile fades as he stares deadpan at the fellow British YouTuber. Tracer’s channel has more subscribers than him, and it does NOT make him feel Gucci. 

…….. of course, but first follow me into my cellar filled with delicious cheeses. 

[neenarchive]

tracer squints into the cellar and takes a greedy handful of cheese from a barrel marked ‘dairy free’. she’s not real hungry but she can’t afford to show weakness in front of her new friend and possible future YouTube collaborator….

oi fook yum how did u know how much i love cheese? this dairy free gouda sure is tastie mister voldemor-

wait…. wot are u doin’ love?

[tallwife]

[neenarchive]

lacticus doloricus… the fourth forbidden curse

HNNNG OH FOCK NO MY LACK TOES INTOLERANTS

[tallwife]

HAH wench! Now how will you make those pizza review videos? I own the British pizza review YouTube niche now.

Now go make some second rate ‘Let’s Play’ series like every other mediocre YouTuber.

[neenarchive]

oi……. don’t forget……… to loike….. comment….., an subscroibe…..

[watercolorworld-kit]

Hey, you. You’re finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there.

[hawkellion]

This is the visual equivalent of my mental state after half a bottle of vodka and a four-pack of red bulls at 4 am during exam season

[twoopy-deactivated20130422]

You could’ve reblogged that from me

[unboy]

my cat: screaming, yowling, circling me as i use the can opener on a can of bean

me:

[feminist-voices]

[danforth]

[mental-ch-illness]

me, as my laptop fan suddenly becomes louder: what is it?? what program?? who is doing this to you????

[pussiesaregod]

the reason i like staying up late so much is because between the hours of 1am-5am, the world is quiet and no one expects anything from me. i could stare at my wall for 4 hours and there would be no consequences. it’s so silent and calm. i love it

[45888347-inactive]

cardinal truths:

-women be shoppin

-men get pegged

-cops are bastards

-shrimpin ain’t easy

[catchymemes]

[lesbianshepard]

we closed 15 minutes ago and this one customer is still shopping and giving us attitude

[lesbianshepard]

closed 20 minutes ago and this bitch still has her cart. my manager is getting pissed. 👀

[lesbianshepard]

manager changed the announcement from “The store is closed and the registers will be shutting down shortly. Please proceed to the front.” to “The store is closed and registers have shut down. Please exit the building.”

The customer scoffed. I’m about to go fucking feral.

[lesbianshepard]

final update bc i just got out: manager actually fucking did it and shut down all the registers. customer got up front and freaked out with the cart. “What am I supposed to do with this!?” the customer shouts. my manager smiles and takes the cart. “don’t worry,” she says “we’ll put it back for you.”

customer stormed out and tried to get the last word in by shouting “you just lost a paying customer!” like….no….because the store is closed…

[alltimevirgilant]

people really think they be that entitled to shit huh?

[thorsthot]

i’ve been laughing at this for the past five minutes

[cyber-yeezuss]

I wanna be 14 again and ruin my life differently… I have new ideas

[smellectric]