The Gondolend Archives

A dumping place for lore, unused concepts, and inspirations for Gondolend, a dinopunk science fiction setting. Main blog: @that-dinopunk-guy

[gondolend]

Obligatory pinned post of Gondolend stories

The Lek

The Women with Tattooed Faces

The Messenger

The Silver Pipe

The Crocodile Tamers

The Guardian

The Wall

The Hunter

The Prey

Long Winter Night

Eleven Days in the Valley

The Fisherman

The Houses of Stone

The Isani District

The Mirung

The Beasts of Kulig County

The Capris Herder

Woe be upon you: a selection of terrible Gondolend short fiction appears

[lesbx]

Ant wars are the most badass thing in the entire world i’m so serious

“bugs fight ten million wars every day” statistical error, most bugs chillax like crazy. Ants on the other hand have waged bloody war for millions of years and have trained their bodies and minds for battle from birth as modern day tiny spartans and are an outlier

[gondolend]

For a while I toyed with the idea of writing a bit of flash fiction told from the perspective of a Samara ant involved in a war with another colony, but I ended up putting Gondolend on hiatus before it got anywhere.

[gondolend]

The Ghurz

The Ghurz, who appeared in The Silver Pipe and, though not explicitly identified as such, in The Guardian, were a nomadic tribe that lived in the lands north and west of the Opthalm Sea. Visually, their ancient incarnations took a lot of inspiration from the Ouled Nail of Algeria:

Being nomads without a consistent place to store their shit, Ghurz women typically wore much of their family's wealth on their bodies in the form of elaborate jewelry.

In ancient times, the Ghurz used domesticated akhs (Altirhinus) as mounts and beasts of burden, and they had also domesticated an unspecified genus of proceratosaurid for use as guard animals.

Altirhinus by Jack Wood.

Proceratosaurus by Gabriel Ugueto.

In Saum Geron, among the largely patriarchal Saumadhi people, the Ghurz had kind of a mixed reputation. While they were a valued source of exotic foreign goods picked up on their travels, they, and particularly their women, were also looked down on for their cultural attitude towards sex; among the Ghurz casual, premarital sex was not seen as bad or shameful, and in fact many Ghurz women engaged in prostitution to earn money on their stops outside villages and cities. Unfortunately, while they saw nothing wrong with it, and they had no shortage of enthusiastic customers, it gave rise to a social stigma among neighboring groups that believed that women should be quiet, submissive, and chaste. Not like those Ghurz hussies, who liked to laugh and dance and fuck all the live long day!

Unfortunately these undeservedly negative attitudes towards the Ghurz would haunt them into the modern day, where if I'd featured them in any stories they would have basically become that region's version of the Romani, an unfairly persecuted minority kept on the fringes of society.

[gondolend]

A quick bit of Gondolend history trivia: much like the United States, the nation of Dio first began as a colony; in its case, it was a colony of the Tamni Empire that eventually declared its independence.

Unlike the United States, this occurred in Gondolend's late iron age and their war of independence was won when the Diojin army destroyed almost the entire Tamni navy in a single night by using a Greek fire-like substance to set an entire river on fire.

[gondolend]

The Hahn Gar

In the south of Garacania is the densely forested, mountainous territory of Ulaan Bok, which was conquered and annexed in 462 BCW, over a thousand years before the time of The Beasts of Kulig County. Despite having been a part of Garacania for so long Ulaan Bok's native people, the Hahn Gar, never fully integrated into greater Garacani society; though lingering Garacani racism was undoubtedly part of the reason for this, another was the Hahn Gar's resentment at being made a part of Garacania in the first place. After all, the Hahn Gar had virtually nothing in common with the Garanic tribes that made up the majority of Garacania's population, being instead related to the various peoples of the Tamni Empire to their immediate south. Because of this, despite being folded into the Garacani house system and, on paper at least, being afforded full rights as Garacani citizens, even into the modern day many Hahn Gar barely thought of themselves as part of Garacania.

Anyway, the Hahn Gar take a lot of cues from the Hmong:

One of my more ambitious story ideas that will probably never see the light of day now involved Denika Agares XIX, Garacania's ruler at the time going full-on fascist and kicking off Gondolend's biggest war in centuries, and of course the Hahn Gar, represented by House Fa, would be among those opposed to their country's aggressive actions.

(My story The Capris Herder was meant to be setup for this, showing the growing instability in that part of Gondolendia which in a few years would lead to Garacania taking advantage of the situation to start grabbing up new territory, and the crashed plane mentioned on the news in the final chapter of The Beasts of Kulig County was actually carrying Denika XIX's father, the previous ruler of Garacania, which allowed her to ascend to the throne in the first place.)

Also as an aside, I kind of regret calling them the Hahn Gar, since I feel like that could be seen to imply a possible cultural connection to Garacania that doesn't exist.

[hell-creek-colony]

Talking about the colonists' electric dirtbikes has reminded me, this wouldn't be the first time I've written about a badass warrior woman with black hair and tattoos who rides a dirtbike in dinosaur country. Though I assume Roberta is a lot less reckless about it.

And thinking about that made me briefly wonder who would win in a fight between Roberta Greene and Gina Herodias. I think Gina would have the upper hand in a physical brawl, she'd been training for that since she was seven so she'd take Roberta to the fucking cleaners no question. But I think in any other situation, Roberta's taking her out. Gina may have spent time in her tribe's militia, but Roberta was a Recon Marine trained specifically for sneaking around and, if necessary, dealing with people before they know she's there.

...Not like, lethally of course, and they'd probably become buddies after that, bonding over their various shared interests.

[gondolend]

It didn't make it into the final version, but in earlier drafts of The Beasts of Kulig County Justin Case was shown to be a reader of Chewing.

[gondolend]

So, in the prehistoric depths of Gondolend's ancient past, the ages of dinosaurs and mammals happened basically in reverse: early mammals got the lucky draw in their version of the Triassic and rapidly expanded to rule the planet, while the archosaurs were relegated to the shadows, until the various continents began colliding together to form the current supercontinent, which caused a whole bunch of bullshit like volcanic activity, habitat disruption, and diseases brought about by the sudden mixing of populations that caused a mass extinction event that allowed the archosaurs to move in and evolve into all the dinosaurs and pterosaurs we know and love, don't ask me why they're all chronologically mixed up with Jurassic and Cretaceous species side by side I said don't ask me SHUT UP.

Anyway, because of this, very few mammalian lineages have survived to the modern day, and certainly not any of the ones we get milk from. And yet, because I spent a lot of Gondolend's life span not really thinking about a lot of things I should have, I still made references in my stories to the characters consuming dairy products.

Eventually, this became an issue.

But I came up with a solution. Sure, Gondolend doesn't have cows, or goats, or anything else humans traditionally get their milk from...but it does have lagomorphs.

So I made up a species of giant pig-sized rabbit that the Gondolendians have domesticated and selectively bred for increased milk production. Problem solved. They pour rabbit milk on their cereal.

[gondolend]

The gracilityrants (Gracilityrannini) were a line of derived, hyper-cursorial horse-sized tyrannosaurs I created for Gondolend but never used in any actual stories since their range falls outside most of Gondolendian civilization. Originally they were an offshoot of Tyrannosaurinae, but at some point I changed my mind and made them descended from Albertosaurines instead. If I were still doing anything with Gondolend, I would no doubt retcon them yet again into a derived branch of Nanotyrannidae/Dryptosauridae.

A bit of trivia, when I first came up with these guys, rather than use them for Gondolend I submitted them for potential inclusion in the Speculative Dinosaur Project, who rejected it on the grounds that their tyrannosaurs were "large, and only large." And then later on, they rolled out their own small, cursorial tyrannosaurs with a reduced toe count.

I'm not saying they ripped me off, but it did put a pretty sour taste in my mouth.

[gondolend]

Image by John Conway.

I don't have any problem with Velociraptor, in fact I happen to think dromaeosaurs are (well, were) very interesting animals, but I hate the popular perception of them as these highly intelligent, lightning-fast death machines thanks to movies like Jurassic Park.

Jurassic Park I love you, but god dammit.

So for Gondolend, I deliberately set out to portray its Velociraptor in the most non-threatening, non-badass way possible, which is why Gina punts one like a football in that excerpt up there. In general, throughout its range in Gondolendia Velociraptor is considered an annoying pest and a threat to livestock, and in some areas its local name also doubles as an insult.

Also since Mongolia does not exist in Gondolend I couldn't have it be V. mongoliensis, so I took it and V. osmolskae, added some fictional species, and for reasons that I have long since forgotten named them all after the guys in Monty Python. (Velociraptor chapmani was sadly extinct, having been wiped out through overhunting.)

[gondolend]

I really wish I'd archived the Gondolend wiki entry for Tartoskin's dictator (whose name was an anagram for Robert Mugabe, I believe) that a buddy of mine had written, because the way he met his eventual end when the country imploded was hilarious: apparently the people hated his ass so much that he died when his house was machinegunned, bombed, gassed, and hit with a plane all at the same time.

Just the mental image of that is amazing.

[gondolend]

Selected creatures from Pikan folklore

One of Pika's most memorable exports is its folklore, distributed throughout Gondolendia via the animated children's show Felan's Forest which was popular in many countries during the late 620s ACW. Most of these come from Pika's southeastern region, particularly the foothills of the Ymir Mountains.

Easily the most popular creature from Pikan mythology is the Woda, also known as the Lords or Ladies of the Forest. Overall they are said to resemble human men and women, with a long fuzzy tail and a small hole at the nape of their neck.

Woda women are usually described as wearing long green or brown dresses and modest wimples, while the men are often portrayed as wearing long coats in order to conceal their tails. Alternatively, in some regions they are said to wrap their tail around their waist underneath a long shirt, or simply hide their tail from mortal eyes through the use of their glamour. Woda are said to be quite self conscious about their tails, and will take great offense if attention is called to them with anything but the utmost politeness.

Overall Woda are seen as benign or even helpful, repaying kindness or favors with gifts and beneficial glamour spells, but they can also be quite petty and vindictive if angered. They have also been known to fall in love with humans on occasion, and tales abound of farmboys and farmgirls wooing or being wooed by a Woda and being whisked away into the forest or, alternatively, bringing their new spouse home to live with them there.

Woda are said to live either alone or in small family groups, in homes they build themselves using giant stones piled together. Alternatively, they may live in caves running into the side of a hill or underneath the ground. While they occasionally have been known to invite humans into their homes, precautions must be taken (such as turning an item of clothing inside out) to ward off any glamour they may encounter there.

Woda are also said to be the strongest creatures in the forest, and their men and women alike are described as being able to lift even entire full grown redwood trees and glacial boulders with little effort. In addition to their strength they are effectively immortal, and impervious to most mortal weapons, though it is said that they can be harmed by those bearing certain enchantments. They are also renowned for their wisdom, generally thought of as the wisest beings in the forest.

Like many other mythical beings they possess magical abilities known collectively as glamour, which they often use to cast beneficial spells as payment for favors or place curses in response to a perceived mistreatment or offense. They also commonly use this ability to disguise their homes from any human who should stumble upon them, causing them to only see a random pile of rocks or a dirty hole in the ground.

Inserting an iron nail into the hole in a Woda's neck is said to render them mortal. In this state their tail vanishes and they lose their strength and invincibility, becoming effectively human. Though they occasionally do this willingly so that they may marry a human suitor, in many stories it is also done against their will through deception and trickery. While removing the nail restores their Woda attributes and powers, they are unable to do so themselves and are thus rendered powerless and at the mercy of whoever placed them in that state.

Wodas are also thought to be terrified of thunder, and will always seek shelter during a storm. In most regions this is said to be out of fear of the Great Huntsman, a thunder spirit who hunts them for sport. Woda are also unable to cross running water, and must use bridges or be carried across even the smallest of streams.

(Many speculate that tales of traveling Woda seeking shelter from the Great Huntsman began as a way to encourage people to help those in need; after all, you never know when a traveler caught out in the rain might be a Woda in disguise, ready to reward those who aid them, or punish those who refuse.)

A more malevolent variation on the Woda myth is the Horka. Though largely similar to the Woda, the Horka is seen as a dangerous trickster, often luring hapless mortals deep into the forest with their enchanting singing in order to enslave or devour them. They are differentiated from the Woda by having their backs covered with leaves, bark, or scales, depending on the region.

The Holbarn are a constant presence in the folklore of southeastern Pika, playing the role of environmental guardians and capricious trickster spirits. Just as likely to be helpful as harmful and operating by rules that mortals would find baffling and inconsistent at best, it's generally agreed that the Holbarn are best left to their own devices.

Miss Geldy is another popular figure from Pikan folklore. Once a normal human woman, Miss Geldy was said to have angered the Holbarn in some way and was subsequently cursed with the legs of a hypsilophodont. Now shunned by society and unable to marry, Miss Geldy became consumed by jealousy of other women, whom she is said to lure into the woods with her singing before brutally kicking them to death with her powerful legs. Quick-thinking girls can avoid this fate, however, by asking to see her dance; having been a skilled dancer in her previous life she will happily oblige, until doing so reveals her dinosaur legs and she runs away in shame, leaving her would-be victim unharmed.

Despite her murderous habits Miss Geldy can also be quite helpful, and even into modern times it is customary for farmers in remote areas to leave out offerings of food and beer to entice her to watch over their livestock. She is also very protective of children, and will never let any harm come to them, though if given the opportunity she will also not hesitate to steal an untended child away to raise as her own. In order to prevent this, children going into the woods are taught to wear something red at all times.

[gondolend]

...Making this post made me imagine Miss Geldy watching over and protecting some Pikan peasant girl for years and years, and then the second she hits whatever age it is that makes one an adult in their society she kills the shit out of her.

She...probably wouldn't do that.

[gondolend]

Selected creatures from Pikan folklore

One of Pika's most memorable exports is its folklore, distributed throughout Gondolendia via the animated children's show Felan's Forest which was popular in many countries during the late 620s ACW. Most of these come from Pika's southeastern region, particularly the foothills of the Ymir Mountains.

Easily the most popular creature from Pikan mythology is the Woda, also known as the Lords or Ladies of the Forest. Overall they are said to resemble human men and women, with a long fuzzy tail and a small hole at the nape of their neck.

Woda women are usually described as wearing long green or brown dresses and modest wimples, while the men are often portrayed as wearing long coats in order to conceal their tails. Alternatively, in some regions they are said to wrap their tail around their waist underneath a long shirt, or simply hide their tail from mortal eyes through the use of their glamour. Woda are said to be quite self conscious about their tails, and will take great offense if attention is called to them with anything but the utmost politeness.

Overall Woda are seen as benign or even helpful, repaying kindness or favors with gifts and beneficial glamour spells, but they can also be quite petty and vindictive if angered. They have also been known to fall in love with humans on occasion, and tales abound of farmboys and farmgirls wooing or being wooed by a Woda and being whisked away into the forest or, alternatively, bringing their new spouse home to live with them there.

Woda are said to live either alone or in small family groups, in homes they build themselves using giant stones piled together. Alternatively, they may live in caves running into the side of a hill or underneath the ground. While they occasionally have been known to invite humans into their homes, precautions must be taken (such as turning an item of clothing inside out) to ward off any glamour they may encounter there.

Woda are also said to be the strongest creatures in the forest, and their men and women alike are described as being able to lift even entire full grown redwood trees and glacial boulders with little effort. In addition to their strength they are effectively immortal, and impervious to most mortal weapons, though it is said that they can be harmed by those bearing certain enchantments. They are also renowned for their wisdom, generally thought of as the wisest beings in the forest.

Like many other mythical beings they possess magical abilities known collectively as glamour, which they often use to cast beneficial spells as payment for favors or place curses in response to a perceived mistreatment or offense. They also commonly use this ability to disguise their homes from any human who should stumble upon them, causing them to only see a random pile of rocks or a dirty hole in the ground.

Inserting an iron nail into the hole in a Woda's neck is said to render them mortal. In this state their tail vanishes and they lose their strength and invincibility, becoming effectively human. Though they occasionally do this willingly so that they may marry a human suitor, in many stories it is also done against their will through deception and trickery. While removing the nail restores their Woda attributes and powers, they are unable to do so themselves and are thus rendered powerless and at the mercy of whoever placed them in that state.

Wodas are also thought to be terrified of thunder, and will always seek shelter during a storm. In most regions this is said to be out of fear of the Great Huntsman, a thunder spirit who hunts them for sport. Woda are also unable to cross running water, and must use bridges or be carried across even the smallest of streams.

(Many speculate that tales of traveling Woda seeking shelter from the Great Huntsman began as a way to encourage people to help those in need; after all, you never know when a traveler caught out in the rain might be a Woda in disguise, ready to reward those who aid them, or punish those who refuse.)

A more malevolent variation on the Woda myth is the Horka. Though largely similar to the Woda, the Horka is seen as a dangerous trickster, often luring hapless mortals deep into the forest with their enchanting singing in order to enslave or devour them. They are differentiated from the Woda by having their backs covered with leaves, bark, or scales, depending on the region.

The Holbarn are a constant presence in the folklore of southeastern Pika, playing the role of environmental guardians and capricious trickster spirits. Just as likely to be helpful as harmful and operating by rules that mortals would find baffling and inconsistent at best, it's generally agreed that the Holbarn are best left to their own devices.

Miss Geldy is another popular figure from Pikan folklore. Once a normal human woman, Miss Geldy was said to have angered the Holbarn in some way and was subsequently cursed with the legs of a hypsilophodont. Now shunned by society and unable to marry, Miss Geldy became consumed by jealousy of other women, whom she is said to lure into the woods with her singing before brutally kicking them to death with her powerful legs. Quick-thinking girls can avoid this fate, however, by asking to see her dance; having been a skilled dancer in her previous life she will happily oblige, until doing so reveals her dinosaur legs and she runs away in shame, leaving her would-be victim unharmed.

Despite her murderous habits Miss Geldy can also be quite helpful, and even into modern times it is customary for farmers in remote areas to leave out offerings of food and beer to entice her to watch over their livestock. She is also very protective of children, and will never let any harm come to them, though if given the opportunity she will also not hesitate to steal an untended child away to raise as her own. In order to prevent this, children going into the woods are taught to wear something red at all times.

[gondolend]

Pika

Pika (pronounced Pai-ka, like the alpine lagomorph, not Pee-ka, like the pokemon) is the birthplace of travel writer Cameron Runnels and a complete fucking mess when it comes to cultural influences. The people are white, a lot of their folklore is influenced by that of the British Isles and Scandinavia, their dominant religion is basically Shinto with the serial numbers filed off, and if the names on that map are any indication their language is just all over the place. This is actually true of a lot of Gondolend, I spent way too much time just throwing all sorts of shit into a pile and mashing it together without any real consideration towards consistency or making sense beyond what I thought sounded cool at the time. Which I think is partly why I ended up stepping away from it to focus on Erud and my Hell Creek colony setting, because I wanted to start fresh having learned what not to do from working on Gondolend.

Pika and its people are generally considered pleasant and inoffensive, though as noted by Cameron in The Isani District they're still lagging behind places and groups in areas like gay rights and the legalization of weed. The northern part of the country also has a distinctly Asian-inspired flavor in various aspects of its culture, being bordered on the north by the Japanese and Mongolian-inspired Dio and being influenced by centuries of trade and cultural exchange.

I haven't gotten into too many specifics about Pika's native fauna, but it is home to gwangis (Acrocanthosaurus) and fodongs (Purussaurus).

(Image by Gabriel Ugueto.)

(Image by LiterallyMiguel.)

Based on the overall fauna of that region of Gondolendia one can also assume that it's home to various species of deinonychosaurs, proceratosaurids, abelisaurs, sauropods, ceratopsians, spinosaurs, stegosaurs, ankylosaurs, landcrocs, and all manner of birds and pterosaurs.

[gondolend]

Here's some fun Gondolend character trivia, Pete Murray, the ranch hand from The Beasts of Kulig County, was named after the singer of one of my favorite bands, Ultraspank.

I listened to Progress a lot while brainstorming ideas for Gondolend back in the day, to the point where it's pretty much permanently associated with it in my brain.

[gondolend]

Death's Kiss

Among the many things I came up with for Gondolend and never actually did anything was Death's Kiss, a hemorrhagic fever that was basically turbo-ebola because I read The Hot Zone at an impressionable age.

From the (now defunct) Gondolend wiki:

Death's Kiss (Sarcofur) (Lish'Kenk in Isinic) is a filovirus of the Baz'maha. It strikes only occasionally and unpredictably from an unknown animal reservoir (there being so many species in the forests, it would be essentially impossible to determine where the virus comes from, even if the notoriously xenophobic Isani did allow anyone in to search for it). When it does break out it causes horrific hemorrhagic fevers with a mortality rate of effectively 100%.

Because the results of an outbreak are so dire, Isani tribes that know of an infection will usually resort to drastic measures to contain it. Most famously, a perimeter is set up around the infected area and anything or anyone trying to leave the area is shot on sight. Fortunately, because of its high mortality rate and the speed at which it kills its victims, when contained in this manner the outbreaks tend to burn themselves out fairly quickly.

Presumably humans are not its intended host, and one can probably assume it's significantly less lethal to whatever animal that is.

The disease typically progresses through four stages:

Within two or three days of infection individuals begin to experience severe headaches, fever, joint or abdominal pain, exhaustion, and dizziness.

Within a day the symptoms rapidly escalate to bloody diarrhea and vomiting, as well as massive internal and external bleeding. They begin to bleed from every orifice, as well as even the slightest puncture wound. The victims's skin becomes red and blotchy, their eyes turn bright red and fill with blood, and their faces begin to lose expression as the connective tissues beneath their skin begin to dissolve. The skin becomes baglike, and tears like wet tissue paper. The surface of the tongue and the lining of the throat slough off, and are either swallowed, inhaled, or coughed up.

The third stage begins when the bloodstream begins throwing clots. These clots accumulate and become lodged throughout the body, disrupting circulation and causing large-scale organ damage. Brain damage begins to set in as clots gather in the brain. The organs begin to decay and liquefy and the liver, kidneys, gall bladder, and intestines all cease functioning completely.

Usually around five days after showing the initial symptoms the victim crashes, going into violent epileptic convulsions. Vast quantities of infected blood and liquefied organs are expelled through the mouth and anus; in the latter case the intestinal lining is sloughed off and expelled as well. This blood is seething with virus particles, and anyone coming into contact with it is sure to be infected, and the grisly process begins anew.

Also from its wiki page:

So far Death's Kiss seems to be spread by direct contact with infected bodily fluids such as blood or saliva. It is also able to spread through skin and mucus membrane contact, though it is not known how effectively. Given how swiftly the disease seems to spread through doomed villages, it has been speculated that it may also be airborne, but this has not been verified.

It is unknown what treatments the Isani use for Death's Kiss, as no one ever lives to tell. Given their other medicinal practices however, it can be assumed to consist mainly of herbal remedies and prayer. It can also be assumed to be ineffective. There is no vaccine.

It has been speculated that in many cases the disease may be inadvertently brought into the villages by infected women. Kissing is a common way to show affection and greet friends among Isani women, which would spread the virus very quickly among the village's female population. They would then go on to infect their husbands, children, etc. While many erroneously cite this as the reason for the disease's name, in actuality it is named for the mad death goddess Kenk, due to the massive bleeding involved and Kenk's supposedly insatiable thirst for blood.

Isinic mythology tells of what may be the first known outbreak of Death's Kiss. The story tells that one day Varlu, out of spite for her mortal-loving aunt [Ghina], released Kenk among the Isani. There she went wild, killing thousands. Finally she was confronted by Ghina's current mortal lover, Hamman Spur. Hamman was then killed, which drove Ghina to attack her crazed niece in a blind rage. Though she ultimately was killed by Kenk for a second time, Ghina was able to knock her out long enough to be returned to her prison beneath the Endet Mountains.

So yeah I put Ebola But Worse in Gondolend because I found it scary.

[gondolend]

Shaiyo Oka's pocket knife.

[gondolend]

Turns out Oka has a lot of options to annoy her knife snob girlfriend.