and Miles to go before I sleep

DID system with several comorbidities. Here mostly as a place for our system members to share their own thoughts. collectively Miles he/they/it

[loveridden1999]

person (non-practicing)

[gothextramiles]

We used to think we were like psychic or something but actually other alters love airdropping the fronter information. Oh you want to know what tree that is? Don't worry, a guy who cares about what trees are called is screaming it at you from the other room.

[gothextramiles]

We used to think we were like psychic or something but actually other alters love airdropping the fronter information. Oh you want to know what tree that is? Don't worry, a guy who cares about what trees are called is screaming it at you from the other room.

[anti-willo-miku]

I think identity disturbance beyond the presence of alters should be talked about more in CDD spaces. Even between individual alters, we often struggle to tell who I am at each time. It’s never a clear cut “X alter likes Y and behaves like Z”.

[gothextramiles]

The brain every 3 weeks: hmmmmmmm, I'm bored. Shuffle the alters to see which 20 front this month. Make it a weird mix no one would ever expect. All random. Yeahhhhh perfect.

[gothextramiles]

TW: extremely ableist language vent

I am the biggest piece of shit, I can't believe anyone puts up with me. We sleep all day. Lay awake all night. No contribution to the world. Just taking and taking. I believe there are some who would call us a "useless feeder" and it's true. Drain on society. Drain on my wife. Drain on my own body. I funnel good things out of every situation. Can't believe anyone let's me stick around.

[themockingbirdnebula]

Queer plural system, call that a fruit basket

[gothextramiles]

Fronting and realizing you're eating your favorite breakfast: 😁🥰🤩🥳✨💖

Realizing your on your last bite and someone else ate the rest of it: 🫪😭🫠😵🕳️💔

[gothextramiles]

It's nice to know WHY we regularly feel the need to tear off all of our skin and step out of this body as the True Body each alter associates with in our mind. Somehow though knowing has not helped the feeling and now we just get dysphoric about the human body we have and know we can't ever change it. Anyway fuck the identity bullshit. I hate this part of things.

[pro-recovery-kaito-vocaloid]

Maybe unpopular opinion but I kinda want any and all DID education to stop focusing on the rarity of things and start focusing on the mistreatment of us as trauma survivors...

[gothextramiles]

Just thinking AGAIN about the time we saw 3 separate ppl (in as many days) blaming their ableism towards severely physically disabled folx on their DID. It pisses us off so bad as a system who also is severely physically disabled. What do you mean your first response for being called out for your ableism is "well we have DID and someone else in our system said that," and not "I'm sorry. I understand. I won't do it again." Literally not everything is about your trauma guys. Get your shit together and stop being ableist to physically disabled ppl.

[creepycrag]

If you remember being a teenager you're a creep because you straight up saw yourself naked back then. The only way to be righteous is to obliterate your mind with drugs until you can't remember anything

[gothextramiles]

I have one vice and it's reading other people's drama. Tumblr is perfect for me bc I get to discover micro communities I know nothing about and read all of their drama all the time. It's kinda like watching reality tv but instead of it all being staged it's real 30yo ppl who care more about micro identity politics than anything else. Pls tell me more about why you have a 10 foot DNI full of terms I've never heard of. Give me a rabbit hole to go down.

[hotdog-puppy]

you know im starting to understand what this draft actually meant

[gothextramiles]

🎼🪅 for the ask game :))

🪅 Is splitting a frequent occurrence for you? How long does splitting take for you? What is that experience like?

Yes! Our therapist described it as our only release valve when there is tension. So basically we're splitting all the time unless there happens to be a nice peaceful stint. Because it happens fairly often it can be difficult to really identify when it's happening and what it feels like bc it's just "normal" for us. But I think when many splits are happening at once we tend to get blurry for a while and extra fatigued. We don't get split headaches that we know of but we also have chronic migraines so like lol maybe that's why.

🎼 What is a quote/lyric that really resonates with you?

Is your brain singing songs to itself?

Are the miles calling for help?

Do your words taste real when they’re belted?

Does your mind feel good when it’s melted?

~Everlasting by Matt Maeson

The whole song is very dissociation coded, but these lines specifically get us bc our collective name is hidden in it. Feels like it was written about us.

[opossum-et-al]

CDD system ask game because it's been long enough that i need to make another one of these

🪅 Is splitting a frequent occurrence for you? How long does splitting take for you? What is that experience like?

🪁 What's a unifying like/dislike that (mostly) everyone in your system shares?

🔥 Are there any alters that swear more/less than most of you?

🏆 Who is a alter you'd like to thank/give some recognition to? (no need to name names if you're/they're not comfortable!)

💐 What is something someone has done/can do that makes you feel seen/supported as a system?

📻 How does internal communication work for you? Does the ability to communicate vary between alters? Does communication take the form of words, images, emotions, etc.?

🥁 Do you experience chronic pain?

🎒 Are there any items you carry with you that help ground you? If not, what would you choose to carry?

🐾 Do you have any non-human alters? Feel free to share what species!

🗓️ Do you have any alters that feel connected to/like they're from a different time period? Feel free to elaborate!

🍋‍🟩 Are there flavours most of you like/dislike that specific alter(s) hate/love?

🎻 Are there any songs/genres of music that most of you like/dislike that specific alter(s) hate/love?

❓ What is a question you still have about your disorder?

🚫 What is something about your disorder you don't think is talked about enough?

🗂️ (if you have a journal) Do you share a journal or do alters have their own journals?

🎼 What is a quote/lyric that really resonates with you?

🪵 What is a piece of advice you've received/something you've learned that has helped you and you'd like to share with other systems?

note: this ask game is made and intended for those w DID/OSDD/p-DID/etc. please only use this if this applies to you :))

[gothextramiles]

Send us asks pls

[gothextramiles]

Wife looked at the video we were watching earlier and goes "I've seen you watch this video 4 times already" on a video I have no memory of. Which I assumed must happen bc we switch often and have a fair amount of always between most parts AND TikTok had been feeding us the same videos repeatedly recently. But damn. Four times already?