Warning: You Are Entering Ryan Space

Welcome this is the origin of all things random. You have two options jump on this train of insanity or get the hell out the way, your choice. Anything i write will be at http://klondikeskittles.tumblr.com/

[yellowmagicalgirl]

Humans Are Weird: Eclipse Edition

While watching the NASA livestream today, I learned that Earth is the only planet in our Solar System that is able to have eclipses. What if aliens don’t have eclipses? Imagine how terrifying it would be for them.

“Human-Jane, your planets’ star is disappearing! ”

“It’s okay, Tyrridian-Sedderkt. It’ll come back. Stop looking at it, you’ll hurt your eyes.”

And what about the ones whose planets do have eclipses?

“Human-Steve, you’re going to burn your ocular sensors! ”

“Thanks for the concern, Fejnil-Gybnu, but relax. See these glasses here? They’re made so that people can watch eclipses. ”

“Wait… you mean your species regularly stares at the corona of your star?!?!”

“Well, we don’t get eclipses that often, only have one moon, but yeah. ”

[allroundfangril]

@space-australians

[green-eyed-bamf]

dude hat is objectively false, mars is actually the only planet in this system with a moon that doesnt experience them, pluto gets them for pete’s sake

[yyyyddmmsupremacy-deactivated20]

remember when you could say stuff like “the earth is round” or “nazis are bad” and be absolutely certain everyone who heard you would agree

[yourplayersaidwhat]

Warlock (ooc): … You call someone a “motherfucker” if they sleep with a mother, but what’s the equivalent for someone who sleeps with gods? Paladin (ooc): Ambitious.

- a fantastic late night conversation. (via yourplayersaidwhat)

[ruinedchildhood]

[mainelysyd]

[thelastpilot]

Sick ass adventure wizard investigates native crustacean with his supportive but easily spooked familiar 

[eclipsebykimlipmp3-deactivated2]

[123iloveyoutoo]

is this?? a flat earth meme????

[triad9462]

Op clearly isn’t thinking with relativity.

The reason we don’t do flying off into space is because the Earth is so massive we don’t even feel the forces pulling us off because they’re practally non-existent(weaker than Earth’s own gravity, which is already pretty weak).

We’re pressed into the walls of the ride because compared to the Earth, the forces pulling us from its center are much stronger( If you were in the ride’s center all the forces would cancel out and you’d fall into it and get badly hurt when it goes near-vertical).

Do I need to explain further?

[eclipsebykimlipmp3-deactivated2]

youre so smart! FUCK DUDE

[butt-berry]

Ready to trick-or-treat

[butt-berry]

Update:

[jame7t]

reblog this post to literally teleport

[demonessss]

where to?

[jame7t]

yeah

[sonypraystation]

roses are red 

violets are blue

i want a goth girl 

i need a goth girl

[cuntbianythin]

But do you deserve a goth girl?

[cuntbianythin]

Have you earned that goth girl?

[sonypraystation]

i dont and im an idiot fucking fool for thinking so

[theinturnetexplorer]

It’s arguably more the cats’ house than his at this point.

[nz45south]

He is not crazy he is wonderful and I love him and his 7 fluffy children

[cisnowflake]

Goals

[rhv]

seduce me with ur history knowledge 

[simaraknows]

vikings made their woman handle the finances because they thought math is witchcraft

[danray002-deactivated20241205]

During a military campaign, Vlad the Impaler, the basis for Dracula, once pulled his troops out of a major engagement in a valley at dusk so that the sun was in their enemies’ eyes. Once they were over the hill, they set loose a bunch of rabid bats who flew away from the sun (towards the enemy) and attacked them, leading to significant infection in their ranks, and Vlad’s eventual victory. Because of how the bats appeared from where Vlad’s soldiers appeared to be at dusk, myth stated that the soldiers turned into bats at night, which is where the “Dracula can change into a bat” thing came from.

[lapisbitch]

raphael, the renaissance painter, literally fucked himself to death

[sirl33te]

during the Ottoman Empire, the Sultan Ibrahim I had 280 of his concubines drowned in the ocean after ONE of them slept with another man.

[verysadskeleton]

The earths carbon levels fell by 700 million tons because Genghis Khan killed so many people

[stitch-n-time]

King James (the one known for revising the Bible) liked to watch women give birth. That’s where the “tradition” of women laying on their backs to give birth comes from.

Previous to that it was common for women to have chairs with holes in them and straw underneath, so they could sit on this special chair and let gravity help with the birthing process.

[kanthia]

Spicy foods were thought to increase libido and cause children to masturbate. To prevent kids from touching themselves at night, a man named Kellogg invented the blandest combination of cereals, marketed it at kids, and called it Corn Flakes

[spockyykins]

At the Battle of Gettysburg during the American Civil War, a small group of Union soldiers had run out of ammo against a large group of the Confederate Army. In a panic, the Union soldiers sprinted at them, screaming, with only bayonets drawn. The entire Confederate Army that was present turned and ran away in fear, not knowing that they had literally no ammunition.

[obaewankenope]

When the Roman Emperor Caligula went to invade Britain he stood on the coast of Gaul with his army and suddenly declared war on Neptune, God of the Sea. He had his men collect sea shells from the shore as “spoils from the Ocean”.

Oh and he appointed his horse to the senate.

[nat-20s]

During the Austro-Prussian war of 1868, Liechtenstein sent over an army of 80 people, but ended up coming back with 81 people because they befriended a guy on the other side.

[aphony-cree]

People refused to send art and sculptures to be displayed at the Chicago World’s Fair because of Chicago’s history with fire. They had to fireproof the Fine Arts building to get people to agree to loan them their art. A year after the fair closed most of the grounds were destroyed by fire but the Fine Arts building survived. It’s now the Museum of Science and Industry.

[naphula]

The carbon emissions thing from Ghenghis Khan is not the whole story. He also planted trees wherever he conquered land because he liked trees and thought they were important. He conquered enough to make an impact on the global climate.

[givemeunicorns]

Radu III, brother of Vlad III( Vlad the Impaler)  nearly killed Mehmed II, the future Sultan of the Ottoman’s, after Mehmed invited him up to his chambers. Radu, seemingly unaware that the offer was sexual in nature, was startled when Mehmed embraced and then tried to kiss him. Radu stabbed the prince in the leg, then ran and hid in a tree. They later became lovers, and maintained a relationship for the rest of their lives

[queerstorian]

Just googled the last one because holy shit that’s magnificent and seemed to good to be true, but not only did it actually happen, but I also learned that radu was known as “radu the beautiful”

[afewreelthoughts]

fun date idea: stab him in the leg

[sarahw-world]

If TFS ever parodies the scene when Vegeta gives Whis instant noodles, then when Vegeta says "Bulma can't go a week without eating this" if they don't have him say "My Dick" I will be really disappointed lol

DAMN!

I…Ummm…

I was goingto say that that line was a bit too… Uh… Naughty…

But then Irealized this is TFS we’re talking about!

[ruinedchildhood]

we’re all waiting @ 2017

[green-eyed-bamf]

Would take a miracle or a therapist, probably both

[ruinedchildhood]

I love Futurama

[ruinedchildhood]

[just-shower-thoughts]

With the inevitability of self driving cars, upon being stolen, they can lock the thief in and drive to the police station.

[the-real-eye-to-see]

[right]

if u think about it this is really sad