Beige is the New Pink @guardalier - Tumblr Blog

instead of build-a-bear try build-a-healthy-relationship-with-your-child

giantsorcowboys

royaltyfreehorsesound

thinkpiecebot

We’re Approaching Bubonic Plague All Wrong & How To Use Soap To Fix It

unregistered-hypercam2-deactiva

yo this bot just wrote a headline from 1342

When in doubt, stomp it out 💋👠

Oh boy, the marching arts have taught me so much about everything. Life, performance, physical abilities, and most importantly myself. So much of my self-exploration has been done through performance in colorguard, and I really owe so much of my success elsewhere in my life to what I have learned in both drum corps and winterguard. It’s crazy what all this activity has to offer, though it may seem insane to outsiders, I’m very grateful to have chosen this path. Happy #March4

#march4

taintedjojo

rosworms-is-shadowbanned

Maui is not obese

Maui is a powerful demigod. Big and strong and… oh, you think he looks fat?

That’s probably because you’ve been conditioned by the media to accept this

as what strong and fit looks like. Amiright?

Sadly… these guys are not all that strong. Yeah, they got muscles… but they aren’t built in a useful way. They are built for looks and that’s about it.

This…

is a strong guy. Actually a competitor in the Strongman competition. But… his tummy sticks out and he doesn’t look like a Dorito.

You know who else is strong?

These guys…

And Maui…

Look at those arms, omg. And that solid, sturdy torso. You can see a shadow where his meat covers his ribs, but he doesn’t look like any slouch to me.

And this guy…

That’s Dwayne Johnson’s grandfather. When the Disney animators showed him their sketches of Maui, he pulled out a picture of his grandfather and showed it to them because he was amazed how similar they looked. This dude was also a pro wrestler.

There’s actually a great infographic about ab muscles and stuff over HERE. but this is the part i want to show you.

Now… look at Maui again.

That thickness don’t move like fat. It doesn’t jiggle and he’s able to flex it. Look at how it sits on his body. It doesn’t sag… he doesn’t have a gut. There’s even a slight V shape to his torso.

It’s just big and not ‘defined’.

And people aren’t used to that.

(sorry, this isn’t the most organized post… i kinda just let it all spill out)

full-lifeconsequences

(x)

freshstartsarenteasy-deactivate

omg unmute this

pandavalkyrie

You cannot predict how this video ends

katelouisepowell

I’m sobbing

toloveviceforitself

I don’t understand why I’m laughing so much

elmesza

cwunch

♡

commongayboy-deactivated2018082

freshmoviequotes

Paterson (2016)

nursery-deactivated20160926

aries: *basic human trait* taurus: *basic human trait* gemini: *basic human trait* cancer: *basic human trait* leo: *basic human trait* virgo: *basic human trait* libra: *basic human trait* scorpio: *basic human trait* sagittarius: *basic human trait* capricorn: *basic human trait* aquarius: *basic human trait* pisces: *basic human trait*

mariofartwii

me as hell

gryffindors-keeper

i don’t normally believe in astrology but this one is so accurate!!

onegirlinalltheworld

“I’m one of the worst drivers I’ve ever seen. And I just want you all to know that if you’re ever on the highway behind me, uh… I hear you honking, and I also don’t want me to be doing what I’m doing.”

humoristics

A politician passes away and arrives at the Pearly Gates........

St. Peter greets him. “Nice to meet you! You should know we give you the choice of whether you want to spend eternity in heaven or in hell.” “How do I know which one to pick?” the politician replies. “We let you spend a day in each, and then you may decide.” The politician agrees and is sent to the heavenly realm first.

The experience is okay. He mostly sits around on the clouds singing and playing the harp, and exchanging some pleasant conversation with the angels. He goes back to Peter the next day, and is sent to hell this time.

The elevator arrives at the bottom, and the doors open. He is in a beautiful garden, it’s sunny, and there is a nearby golf course. A bar in the pristine looking garden keeps the drinks flowing: beer, cocktails, wine, whiskey, whatever the heart could imagine. There is also a buffet. All his friends and family that have passed away are there, and they greet him cheerfully. Even Satan is there, and he ends up being a really nice and cool guy who assists the politician in whatever he can. After chatting with them for awhile, the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen comes to him, and they end up having the best sex he has ever experienced.

At the end of the day, the politician goes back to St. Peter. “I hope you enjoyed the tryouts sir. What do you choose, heaven or hell?” The politician replies “well Peter to be honest heaven is great and all, but I really enjoyed hell a lot more. I’d like to go there.”

His wish is granted. When the elevator doors open in hell, he is greeted by horror. The whole place is dark and gloomy, his friends are screaming as they are burning in pits of fire, and demons walk around beating with pitch forks those who try to escape the flames.

The politician walks up to Satan and demands an explanation. “Yesterday it was so nice! A garden, golf, beautiful women, free food and drinks. Yet today you are torturing my friends. What the heck man?” The devil (no longer friendly and cool as he was the day before) smiles slyly. “Sorry for the mixup. But you are a politician, so surely you understand: yesterday we were campaigning, but today you voted.”