WHO CARES?

LEE HAEUN. STUDENT. AMATEUR PHOTOGRAPHER / FILMOGRAPHER AND PROFESSIONAL BULLSHITTER.

[ykjidam]

jidam wraps her arms around herself, rubbing them to try to keep warm from the wind. blinking softly, she tilts her head a bit confused. did people do that? offer to share a taxi? whatever, she shouldn’t be thinking about that. with a slight nod, she slips in, a bit mute since she was a timid girl. “ah, thank you. you’re kind.”

[haeunsi]

“it’s no problem!” she left the door open for other and trudged around to the opposite side, opening that door and sliding into the taxi. she closed the door behind her with haste, rushing to get out of the cold weather that had shrouded the city uninvited. she leaned over the back of the front seat, murmuring directions to the driver and motioning for the girl to hurry and get in. 

[haeunsi]

“I have a really bad idea.”

for @leefall ! taken from this and still accepting ! 

          her first reaction was to hit his shoulder in a (probably failed) attempt to get the male to stop talking but she resisted. she settled a loud groan in his general direction, staring straight at him and hoping he would take a damn hint. she leaned back in her chair while twirling a pencil between her fingers, staring at the blank sheet of paper she had intended to brainstorm. she stood up with a harsh sigh, sticking the pencil behind her ear and heading for her kitchen to grab a bottle of water. 

“your ideas are usually bad anyway but i’m desperate. what is it?”

[shigesu-deactivated20160419]

                                 ❝ They say I’m CRAZY, but I call myself ONE OF A KIND. ❞                                               ✖  reblog for a starter, follow for follow.  ✖

[deadcorpskrp]

[ ☆ ] — ❛ welcome to the club ❜

Here’s a small list of SENTENCE STARTERS. The goal here is to bring up situations your muse has never experienced, all the while havin’ lotsa fun interacting with your partner. I take no credit in any of these, as I simply took sentence starters from other lists. Have fun, guys!

“Specify, you stupid shit.” “I’m covered in cum.” “Whatever, you crazy bitch!” “The drugs never work.” “You’ve got just 2 weeks to live.” “This is what you wanted, right? Now choke on it!” “You’re pathetic and weak and I pity you.“ “I have a really bad idea.” “Before you get any ideas, I don’t care.” “Fuckmother!” “I’m in lesbians with you.” “If I peed my pants would you pretend that I just got wet from the rain?” “It’s milk and eggs, bitch.” “Kick her in the balls!” “You’ve been a good (boy/girl/kid), have a lollipop.” “I haven’t done laundry in six months!” “I’ll split your ass in two.” “Oh my god, blah blah blah.” “You can’t watch porn here, dude.” “So, you always were an asshole.” “That’s illegal, you know?” “You’re pretty strong for a scrawny kid.” “ How does this not gross you out? “ “So we agree that this is your toothbrush?”

[haneulsi-blog]

       The door cracks open and that cues Haneul to shuffle back. He looks at her extended pinkie, wrapping his own around it. His worry didn’t waver, however. She rarely acted like this unless she was quite upset, so whatever the problem was, it was a serious problem.

       Without releasing her little finger, he twists to try to peek into the doorway. A worried some frown was on his face. He keeps her hand in place before she can retreat and lock the door on him again. “What’s going on? Can I do anything?”

[haeunsi]

          “i--” she didn’t want to lie to him, she didn’t want to keep him in the dark. she quickly wiped her eyes with her free hand and moved out from behind the door, stepping into the light of the hallway. she stared at her feet, chewing on the inside of her bottom lip as she stood before him. 

“uh-- i don’t know. i just,” she paused, leaning her head against the doorframe. “i want to be alone. i think.”

[alext]

mystical misty kale grocery garden fuji natura//1600 korea//autumn 2015

[sxqnal-blog]

BOLD what applies to your muse.

PLACE IN SOCIETY

financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty.

medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged.

class or caste: upper / middle / working / slave / unsure.

education: qualified / unqualified / studying.

criminal record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no.

FAMILY

married - happily / married - unhappily / engaged or betrothed / partnered / single / divorced / separated.

has a child or children / has no children / wants children.  

close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased.

orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent(s).

TRAITS + TENDENCIES

extroverted / introverted / in between.

disorganized / organized / in between.

close minded / open-minded  / in between.

calm / anxious / in between.

disagreeable / agreeable / in between.

cautious / reckless / in between.

patient / impatient / in between.

outspoken / reserved / in between.

leader / follower / in between.

empathetic / unemphatic / in between.

optimistic / pessimistic / in between.

traditional / modern / in between.

hard-working / lazy / in between.

cultured / un-cultured / in between / unknown.

loyal / disloyal / unknown.

faithful / unfaithful / unknown.

BELIEFS:

monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic.

belief in ghosts or spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in an afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in aliens: yes  / no / don’t know / don’t care.

religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious.

philosophical: yes / no.

OPINIONS

pro-suicide / anti-suicide / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-euthanasia / anti-euthanasia / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-choice / anti-abortion /  doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-marriage / anti-marriage / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-death penalty / anti-death penalty  / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-drug legislation / anti-drug legislation / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-murder / anti-murder / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-cannibalism / anti-cannibalism / doesn’t know or on the fence.

left wing / right wing / middle / doesn’t know or on the fence.

SEXUALITY + ROMANTIC INCLINATION

heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual.

sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favourable.

romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favourable.

sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious.

potential sexual partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all.

potential romantic partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all.

ABILITIES

combat skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

literacy skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

artistic skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

technical skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

HABITS

drinking alcohol: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

smoking: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

other narcotics: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

medicinal drugs: never / sometimes  / frequently / to excess.

indulgent food: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

splurge spending: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

gambling: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

[haeunsi]

starter for @yatokr !

          "the view is really spectacular.” she stared at the floor between her shoes, resting her hands on her knees. her seat on the subway wasn’t particularly comfortable and the fluorescent lights painted the passengers in a bright, artificial light that looked too white to be real, but her mind was elsewhere. “not even just the view, the entire city. everything about it is spectacular. i want to go back one day.” 

[haeunsi]

starter for @ykjidam !

          she held the taxi door ajar, looking back at the girl she had been waiting with for the past fifteen minutes. the wind hit her at an angle that sent her hair flying in front of her face and she had to peel the strands from her face. “i wouldn’t mind, since your stop is along the way. do you want to share a cab?”

[inhoism-blog]

&&. @haeunsi 

❝ guess there’s just a lot going on in my head. ❞

[haeunsi]

          she could relate to his statement more than she wanted to let on and more than she wanted to admit to herself. she felt her head nod, a reaction she didn’t even have to think about and linked her fingers together, her thumbs aimlessly chasing each other around and around and around. images from the past week played in her head, flashes of regret, bursts of frustration. “i understand how you feel. you think so much and it’s so suffocating that you just wish you could step away from your own brain for a while, right?” 

[haneulsi-blog]

       Haneul kept the apartment quiet while she was out. He rests himself, spread on his bed and with a hand on his chest. It’s complete silence with Hae napping in the living room. Even when Hae is awake, the apartment is mostly calm. Breathing in through his nose, the sound of the door opening is the only thing that breaks the tranquility. Yet he smiles, excited to greet his sister.

       By the time he gets up and reaches his door, Haeun is hurrying to her room. She seems almost frantic to hide away. His smile falls at the sight of his sister, more worry and confusion now on his expression. Now his hand holds itself on it’s door frame; he opens his mouth to ask.

       The girl’s sentence is muffled on the other side of the door, but he knocks against the door anyway. “Haeun? Are you okay?”

[haeunsi]

          she closed her eyes, leaning her head back against the door. she knew he was on the other side of the door but just for this moment she imagined that she was alone and it was peaceful. nothing could harm her from behind her locked door. 

his knock broke her from her spell of serenity, followed by his voice creeping from under the door, through the small crack above the floor. his voice spelled out concerned and, while she wanted to be left alone, a small part of her lit up at her brother’s presence. 

“i’m fine--” her voice betrayed her, the word ‘fine’ snapping in half as it passed through her lips. she unlocked the door with a delicate touch, opening the door wide enough so she could stick her arm through the space and display a closed fist with her last digit in the air, making sure her face was behind the solid wood and out of view. “pinky promise.” 

[hydagryros-deactivated20190707]

       He sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. This is blowing up in front of him all because he couldn’t word himself right. He’s not easily set off, but the regret is just tearing him open. He mentally asks Haeun to stop yelling. And he collects himself.

       “Basically, I jus wanted to see, y’know? Goddammit, I know that makes no sense, but I just realized it ain’t gonna change a thing! Understand I meant nothing by it,” he’s half hopeful she’ll buy it. “I fucked up and m’sorry, but jus let it drop, okay?”

[haeunsi]

           “you ‘just wanted to see.’” 

the silence that followed her statement was met with a dry chuckle and she was almost shocked to realize it came from her own mouth. the room was spinning but she needed to hold tight. the laughter ended in a crack, crumbling from her throat and falling back into her stomach. 

“so you were just goofing around? just wanted to know what it was like?” her mouth contorted into a small smile but it was anything but the intended meaning. “just wanted some experience. huh? fuck, what’s wrong with you?”

it was quiet, she took that as her queue to leave. 

[sixthupet-blog]

SUFFOCATION filled the air he breathed as he noticed the girl’s small movements signalling something not-so-great about what she was thinking. he had learned a lot in his short life!! living with people that look exactly alike each other had helped him to teach himself how to tell who a person is just by the way they moved. TAEWON .. the girl’s cold expression reminded him of his fourth brother. he bit his lip, a small relic habit that he had always made known every time something didn’t go his way. the one thing about her was that she WASN’T taewon .. he actually FELT BAD about making her feel anything worse than what she was feeling. huge eyes sided the girl discreetly as she slid her card to him, doing what she was supposed to do, and having no reaction at all. his original childish and cute smile began to fade away as he inched away nervously while a hand began to pat his neck to distract him from the awkwardness of the situation. 

                                    “i .. is that all?” he CHOKED out, managing                                      to live just ONE MORE day.

[haeunsi]

          she looked up from her vacant gaze on the counter, peering through eyelashes with her mouth agape, tongue stuck in the corner of her cheek. the air around the pair grew tense and his actions mirrored it. did he catch on that quick? maybe he isn’t that stupid, huh. she lifted her head to look at him full on, raising a hand to push her hair away from her face as she gave him a tight smile, the kind you would give to a stranger you passed on the street just to be friendly. her nails tapped on the counter mindlessly as she nodded her head to answer his question-- wait. were those... scones? 

“actually, no.” any sort of annoyance that had been following her before dissolved in an instant, eyes locked on the pastries sitting prettily behind the clear counter. she lifted a finger. pressing it against the glass as she turned her attention back to the male. “i want one of those... thingies.” 

[kxareum-blog]

Resting an elbow on her thigh as she supported the weight of her head, Areum was completely focused in the story. Although she knew her current posture was bad for her, she didn’t hesitate to be comfortable with the other and sat while crossing her legs over the couch. From time to time, the older would throw a quick glance at her friend and at the cat that seemed to be deeply asleep next to her but neither of them would open their mouth until they reached close to the end. “I’m good, thanks. But do you want me to make some more for you though?” The female asked as she noticed the emptied bowl of popcorn.

[haeunsi]

          “no, no.” haeun picked up the bowl, wrapping her arm around the lip and tucking it closer to her body. “i’ll get it myself. i need to move or else my skin is going to attach itself to the couch.” she retreated around the back of the piece of leather furniture, leaning over the edge to scratch behind the cats ears. she smiled softly, standing up straight and calling over her shoulder to the other girl as she approached the kitchen. “plus, i’ve already seen this movie. the ending it the worst part.” 

[hydagryros-deactivated20190707]

       Right, so. He is left with nothing else to say. He just watches everything collapse, right as he felt close to Haeun and he didn’t hesitate to distance himself. But now he’s at a loss, there isn’t anything to grasp onto. Dorian huffs while pushing his hair back from a sweating brow. His speech comes out fast while he tries to justify.

       “Jus- That’s why I stopped talkin’ to you n’stuff. I couldn’t stop thinkin’ about that. I told ya- It’s just weird.. I swear I never thought of ya anything more than a friend.”

[haeunsi]

          she wanted to be finished but his words sparked annoyance. her fists were stuck at her sides, bawled up with her pent rage and confusion that was, slowly but surely, coming to a head in the stairwell. she ran her hands through her hair, keeping her palms against her temples to ease the pressure building between them. 

“did you think not telling me would magically make it go away? do you think ignoring me would making it go away?” she voice rose along with her bubbling anger. “if you didn’t think of me as more than a friend then why kiss me? does that make any sense to you, dorian? because it doesn’t to me.” 

[hydagryros-deactivated20190707]

       He stops a few stairs behind her, stunned at her completely. His face still burns, damn right he’s pissed at himself. And he never meant for it to even happen, it just kicked in with no control of himself. He swallows and then grabs the railing beside him. The whole situation is giving him heartburn. Dorian stays silent, jaw dropped. Clamping it shut, he tries to compose himself. This had to be spoken cafefully with sensitive word choice.

       “Haeun, m’sorry. I didn’t mean it-”

[haeunsi]

          “you can’t do something like that and not mean it.”

she shook her head, forehead creased in frustration. no, you wouldn’t do something like this and not mean it. you can’t. you can’t put friendships in harms way over something you don’t mean. she retreats back, fingertips trailing along the cool laminate of the wall to keep her grounded. the possibility of him not meaning it made it even worse. 

“please, leave me alone for a while.”

[hydagryros-deactivated20190707]

       He trips backwards when he pulls away, hand catching himself at the door behind his back. He feels as stunned as she must be, but partially because it didn’t go at all how he could have expected; kissing Haeun or his first kiss at all. Dammit Dorian couldn’t you have just fucking talked it out like an adult? What happened to all that self-esteem you had before about being unable to make a move on a girl?

       And your best friend too? What a fucking train wreck?

       “I–” Haeun scurries off like a frightened deer. That’s where it hits him with a ‘you’ve done it now, Dorian’. And the worst part is he doesn’t want to see her go, which isn’t like him at all (Is any of this really?). Even if it’s uncharacteristic of him, he goes to follow after her. “Haeun, wait, I fucked up. Let’s try again, let’s talk- Haeun. Lee Haeun.”

[haeunsi]

          she didn’t want to hear him but his words echoed down the staircase, bouncing off wall after wall and hitting her straight on. she slowed down on the stairs, holding onto the wall beside her for support, listening to his footsteps following in her path without the heart to continue her decline to the last floor. fuck. no. she regretted ever coming to see him, she regretted pushing him until he-- her hands bawled to fists. 

she turned to face him when he was close enough, his figure at the top of the steps and approaching quickly. her mouth was as dry as a desert and the lump in her throat grew with each step he took towards her but it wasn’t going to let it happen. she wasn’t going to break down, not here. not in front of him. 

“i’d like it if you wouldn’t contact me for a while.”