shit bagels @hailwhale - Tumblr Blog

if mangoes didn’t have the stone in the middle, humanity would reach a new level of hedonism. we could just eat thru the whole thing without having to think. we’d permanently regress to a primal state. the seed grounds us, makes us careful when we eat. this defines us. fuck i wish i had a mango

adambuffett

when the sun hits your laptop screen just right

dizzi-with-an-i

Nick really said "SPONGEBOB GAY" on twitter

and closed their replies

dankmemeking

assert your dominance by calling your friends by their student ID number

seriousjones

the sexual tension between two gas stations on the same intersection

yarking

I’m so sick of this shit. Two gastations can’t even be on the same block without some walnut shipping them, while I can’t find a single fic for dennys/applebees with dennys bottoming.

storytruths

you’re literally out of your mind if you think Dennys isnt a top

vikingofficial-deactivated20241

I wish the 2012 apocalypse actually happened

teenagerposts

absolutely genius

luckyrabbt

ok but why steal your ex’s netflix when you can buy your own

teenagerposts

piercethebeau

teacher: i want you guys to get into groups me:

pussyong-deactivated20200810

men in california in the 80s were just like “guess i’ll be a serial killer” huh

thivus

living in california will do that to u

alicelovespizza

When a couple acts all romantic in front of me

teenscoolest

slowspinningredemption

listen. from the bottom of my heart. what do you mean, 2000 was 20 years ago.

hotboyproblems

Anyone else only in their 20s but feel like they are running out of time to get their life together??

diinofayce

You can’t just call me out like this.

shittymoviedetails

In Taylor Swift’s 2017 song “Look What You Made Me Do”, she says “I’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams.” This is foreshadowing to her role in Cats (2019), which will give all its viewers nightmares.