Jasper|20|he/him/his|Fragile Capricorn | Musicals, Emo Trinity, Death Note, Zelda, and probably shit posts | Please read my about me! I used to be big in the Spring Awakening fandom and get asks all the time but now I'm just a sad elder SA fan Taken by the cutest tumblr user ever jeremydoesnthaveatumb ❤️
i logged into this account while i was looking for a bootleg post i had saved years ago. first time i've logged in here in like.... five years? i saw the names of a lot of friends i had on here. i saw some inbox messages too, i dunno how old they are. i saw some old posts and messages and just reminisced/spiraled a little bit. i used this blog religiously from when i was 14 to like 18ish. i went thru a lot on here. i had community on here when i was at my loneliest. i was volatile and so scared and trans and queer and i guess in some ways, nothing has changed. im 25 now, gonna be 26 in a couple weeks. i figured i could make a little post to update y'all. i dunno if anyone will read this. but i've been thinking a lot about my friends i made here lately.
i turn 26 in a little over a month. i'm still jasper, havent transitioned yet, but i might be the gayest i've ever been. my coming out process has been Awful to say the least. but my 9 year anniversary with my partner jer is coming up. i'm spending my 26th birthday with jer in salem, mass, my favorite city in the world.
i have an associates degree in theatre and a bachelors degree in english with a creative writing concentration. not doing anything in those fields yet but i'm figuring things out. it hasn't been exactly easy.
i'm figuring my life out i guess! i went thru a very traumatic falling out with a group of friends that abused me during the pandemic. i lost a lot of my college life to a horrible group of people, it's a whole thing i'm not gonna get into right now. in some ways i'm still recovering from that. in some ways i'm better than i've ever been.
i'm like high key a furry now tbh. i have a fursona named salem who kinda saved my life i guess. he is everything to me.
no shock here but i still love fall out boy with every part of my heart, maybe even more than i did when i was a kid. i got my first tattoo and it's a fall out boy one. i also got into a lot of other alternative bands! i adore ghost a lot, i'm seeing them in july. i also love sleep token, spiritbox, bad omens, linkin park, and poppy. music has gotten me thru the worst of the shit i've been thru.
and despite everything, i still love musicals and andy and spring awakening and everything. i actually logged in looking for a wicked bootleg in the wake of the movie coming out. i saw andy as jonathan in tick tick boom in cape cod a couple months ago! front row in this old little local theatre, what a magical night it was. i'm planning on getting andy's handwriting tattooed on me still, and i want some other musical related tattoos eventually (i'll probably be covered in a couple years: gender affirming care).
also i really love spiderman now but no one's shocked by that either, that's just transmasc rite of passage i think.
i guess i'm still the same in a lot of ways. that weirdo little gay boy that felt too much and definitely shared too much. i am so sorry for being way too TMI when i was younger. i was way too young and unsupervised and lonely as hell. i'm happy to say i'm a bit older and a little less lonely and a little more reserved in what i share online now lmfao
that being said, i do art and stuff still! i post my art on instagram (sometimes) at @/witchcityspider and on bluesky @/kingofpentacles if anyone wants to find me there. or if you want my discord or my personal instagram you can let me know. i made another blog at one point that i use here and there: @shadowacademy
i've thought about reaching out to people i used to talk to here but i didn't wanna freak anyone out, so i'm doing this instead.
i'll keep this blog up, check it here and there. in some ways i miss it. i miss the community i guess, having a place i belonged. i've gone through a lot and lost a lot of friends over the past couple years. i mean, hell, i went through a lot on here. it was a huge part of my life, somedays my little sect on here was all i had. and i hope that, even my friends that have deactivated or aren't active, i hope you all are well and happier than we were in 2015. almost a decade ago.
i guess i just wanna hug my little 15 year old self and i wish i could warn him about what has happened to us since, but i can't. but we made it out. despite everything, it's still me.
anyways. i'm around if you're looking to find me. i'm off trying to be cryptic and mysterious but just coming off as a certified yapper elsewhere. i don't wanna be weird and interrupt people that don't wanna see me again, but i do miss so many people from here. i wonder if they ever remember this or think of me and wonder where i've been. maybe it's selfish or maybe it's just human, i'm not sure.
but i'm here. figuring my shit out, but i'm here.
i love all of your lights. you are fabulous creatures, each and every one.
i logged into this account while i was looking for a bootleg post i had saved years ago. first time i've logged in here in like.... five years? i saw the names of a lot of friends i had on here. i saw some inbox messages too, i dunno how old they are. i saw some old posts and messages and just reminisced/spiraled a little bit. i used this blog religiously from when i was 14 to like 18ish. i went thru a lot on here. i had community on here when i was at my loneliest. i was volatile and so scared and trans and queer and i guess in some ways, nothing has changed. im 25 now, gonna be 26 in a couple weeks. i figured i could make a little post to update y'all. i dunno if anyone will read this. but i've been thinking a lot about my friends i made here lately.
i turn 26 in a little over a month. i'm still jasper, havent transitioned yet, but i might be the gayest i've ever been. my coming out process has been Awful to say the least. but my 9 year anniversary with my partner jer is coming up. i'm spending my 26th birthday with jer in salem, mass, my favorite city in the world.
i have an associates degree in theatre and a bachelors degree in english with a creative writing concentration. not doing anything in those fields yet but i'm figuring things out. it hasn't been exactly easy.
i'm figuring my life out i guess! i went thru a very traumatic falling out with a group of friends that abused me during the pandemic. i lost a lot of my college life to a horrible group of people, it's a whole thing i'm not gonna get into right now. in some ways i'm still recovering from that. in some ways i'm better than i've ever been.
i'm like high key a furry now tbh. i have a fursona named salem who kinda saved my life i guess. he is everything to me.
no shock here but i still love fall out boy with every part of my heart, maybe even more than i did when i was a kid. i got my first tattoo and it's a fall out boy one. i also got into a lot of other alternative bands! i adore ghost a lot, i'm seeing them in july. i also love sleep token, spiritbox, bad omens, linkin park, and poppy. music has gotten me thru the worst of the shit i've been thru.
and despite everything, i still love musicals and andy and spring awakening and everything. i actually logged in looking for a wicked bootleg in the wake of the movie coming out. i saw andy as jonathan in tick tick boom in cape cod a couple months ago! front row in this old little local theatre, what a magical night it was. i'm planning on getting andy's handwriting tattooed on me still, and i want some other musical related tattoos eventually (i'll probably be covered in a couple years: gender affirming care).
also i really love spiderman now but no one's shocked by that either, that's just transmasc rite of passage i think.
i guess i'm still the same in a lot of ways. that weirdo little gay boy that felt too much and definitely shared too much. i am so sorry for being way too TMI when i was younger. i was way too young and unsupervised and lonely as hell. i'm happy to say i'm a bit older and a little less lonely and a little more reserved in what i share online now lmfao
that being said, i do art and stuff still! i post my art on instagram (sometimes) at @/witchcityspider and on bluesky @/kingofpentacles if anyone wants to find me there. or if you want my discord or my personal instagram you can let me know. i made another blog at one point that i use here and there: @shadowacademy
i've thought about reaching out to people i used to talk to here but i didn't wanna freak anyone out, so i'm doing this instead.
i'll keep this blog up, check it here and there. in some ways i miss it. i miss the community i guess, having a place i belonged. i've gone through a lot and lost a lot of friends over the past couple years. i mean, hell, i went through a lot on here. it was a huge part of my life, somedays my little sect on here was all i had. and i hope that, even my friends that have deactivated or aren't active, i hope you all are well and happier than we were in 2015. almost a decade ago.
i guess i just wanna hug my little 15 year old self and i wish i could warn him about what has happened to us since, but i can't. but we made it out. despite everything, it's still me.
anyways. i'm around if you're looking to find me. i'm off trying to be cryptic and mysterious but just coming off as a certified yapper elsewhere. i don't wanna be weird and interrupt people that don't wanna see me again, but i do miss so many people from here. i wonder if they ever remember this or think of me and wonder where i've been. maybe it's selfish or maybe it's just human, i'm not sure.
but i'm here. figuring my shit out, but i'm here.
i love all of your lights. you are fabulous creatures, each and every one.
hey, it's lil sis anon. lil sis is in college, I'm in a higher ed institution. I love you, and hope you're well.
hey so i have no clue how old this ask is, its been a hot second since ive checked. i just logged in for the first time in years and made an update post and saw this and had to answer, even if you dont see it.
i am OVERJOYED to hear you and your sister are well!! i still dont know who you are. but the fact that you've kept me updated all these years later is very special.
i hope you and her are happier than ever. if you ever wanna find me elsewhere let me know, but i understand if you dont. but im around. i think im a lot happier now. i hope you are too.
the fact that i am attracted to men after seeing how they act in public bathrooms is evidence that sexuality is not a choice. also, the fact that i still am willing to transition knowing it means i have to use men's public restrooms for the rest of my life is evidence that gender is also not a choice.
And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind
I hope you don’t mind
That I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you’re in the world
Looking low and looking high, there is no food left to find. It’s hard enough to feed yourself, let alone somebody else. I’m trying to believe that the song he’s working on is gonna harbor me from the wind, the wind, the wind.
