Happy Autumn Equinox! Blessed Mabon! https://www.instagram.com/p/CFbLOJ6pen2/?igshid=10qjg5nfk0g6f
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Happy Autumn Equinox! Blessed Mabon! https://www.instagram.com/p/CFbLOJ6pen2/?igshid=10qjg5nfk0g6f
"Silly things do cease to be silly if they are done by sensible people in an impudent way." - Jane Austen, Emma
batman: whatâs the situation?
commissioner gordon: Harley and Ivy have hijacked an AM radio station and taken the employees hostage
batman: what are their demands?
commissioner gordon: they havenât issued any. they, uh.
batman:
[commisioner gordon turns on the radio]
harley: âyou gotta walk away, sweetie. His family sounds completely toxic, if not outright emotionally abusive, and heâs too enmeshed to see it.
caller: no, youâre right. youâre right. I gotta do it.
harley: you got this, honey. now, stay on the line a minute, Iâm writing down some the names of some books for you and you can get those from Ivy after weâre done. okay! our next caller â
[commisioner gordon turns off the radio]
batman: what station is this?
commisioner gordon: WGTM.
batman: the one that rebroadcasts rush limbaugh?
commissioner gordon:
batman:
commisioner gordon: you know what, i probably didnât need to call you for this.
I WOULD PAY MONEY FOR RADIO SHRINK HARLEY OKAY? I WOULD CALL RADIO SHRINK HARLEY OKAY?
âalright, babe, one more reminder that my license was revoked which means i have to tell you this as your friend and not as a mental health professional: you have two options here. one of them is safe, legal, and healthy, and will have lasting long term benefits. the other one is fun.â
reblogging for this extremely accurate addition.
Would love this!
You guys say you like goth girls but youâre unwilling to listen to goth music and dance at goth parties. You guys say you like hippy girls but you donât do drugs and you arenât interested in nature. You guys say you like MILFs but are unwilling to binge watch all the Despicable Me and Minion movies, and you wonât even heart react to their minion memes on Facebook. You guys say you like military wives but are unwilling to read the hours and hours of Reylo Omegaverse cuckolding fanfiction that they write. Ultimately this is just misogynistic fetishization. You value these women solely based on their appearance and are unwilling to indulge in their interests.
creators have been asking themselves the same question over and over again for decades: How do we balance selling young girls femininity combined with empowerment?
Is it short skirts and superpowers?
Is it president Barbie in a ballgown?
Is it for some godforsaken reason being the only worthy girl in a sea of boys?
well Iâm here to say that they might have just discovered the girl power combo that theyâve been searching for⌠Miss Piggy in 5-inch sparkle heels on a motorbike
maâam I will buy whatever the hell aesthetic you are selling.
Building a Magical Home
One of my favorite quotes about the magic of homemaking comes from Cory Hutcheson, host of the New World Witchery podcast. He says, âHome is a transformational act. It is the thing you do to turn a space into a space⌠that is full of ritual and significance and meaning. So there is sort of this ongoing relationship you have with the space that makes it a home.â
The act of creating a home, of making a space your own, is inherently magical. But if you want to make your space feel a little more witchy, here are some ideas to get you started.
Charms and Talismans
Making your own magical objects can be a powerful way to bring magic into your space. The best thing about making your own charms is that you can make them look however you want, so itâs easy to disguise them as ordinary household objects. You can make a charm for any intention by combining objects based on their magical correspondences.
Iâve talked about protective charms in previous posts, so Iâm not gonna spend a lot of time on it here. The simplest protective charm is keeping a large piece of iron under your bed to keep away nightmares, evil spirits, and negative energy. You could also make your own protection charm, like a witch bottle.
You can create a âhappy homeâ charm to bring peace, harmony, and happiness into your home. This charm could include herbs like basil, rosemary, lavender, peppermint, and/or bay leaves, as well as other items that you associate with peace and good fortune, like lucky coins, crystals, or black cat fur. Write your desires for a harmonious and happy home on a piece of paper, fold it up, and add it to the charm. You could store these items in a green bag, bury them in your backyard (in this case, make sure youâre only using biodegradable plant matter â leave out the coins and crystals), or place it inside a household object like a lamp or an end table.
If you suffer from insomnia or other sleep issues, try making a dream charm to help you sleep well and have sweet dreams. To make a simple dream charm, fill a blue or purple bag with lavender, chamomile, peppermint, and any other objects that you associate with peace, restfulness, and sleep. If you want to have lucid dreams or receive psychic messages in your dreams, include a bit of mugwort. Place the charm in your pillow or under your mattress. (I personally swear by this one, as itâs helped a lot with my insomnia.)
Charms are great for homemaking magic because youâre actually creating a magical object, which can then become a permanent fixture of the space.
Magical Decor
You can use magical items to decorate your home to bring certain qualities into that space.
Hanging or displaying a broom is said to bring good fortune, protection from evil, and good hospitality. Cauldrons are used to represent the Goddess, rebirth, and raw potential. Horseshoes hung above door frames bring safety and luck to all who cross under them, and keep unwanted guests away. If you can get them legally and ethically, animal bones, teeth, claws, and feathers can represent the spirit and energy of that animal. You can also put up images of spiritual and occult symbols â I have an image of the Sun tarot card hanging in my bedroom to promote positivity and growth.
If you need to be a little more subtle with your witchy decorations, working with the magic of color is a great way to do that. Gathering a lot of items of a single color in one room changes the energy of that room. Hereâs a quick guide to give you some ideas:
Yellow is associated with divination, mental clarity, the element of air, success, communication, and inspiration.
Purple is associated with divine power, spiritual awareness, mystery, astral travel, magic, and authority.
Blue is associated with healing, psychic abilities, the element of water, peace, truth, and patience.
Red is associated with protection, the fire element, sex, power, vitality, and love.
Orange is associated with ambition, creativity, breaking through blockages, and career success.
Pink is associated with romantic love, friendship, self love, compassion, and emotional well-being.
Green is associated with nature, herbalism, the earth element, money, wealth, prosperity, and luck.
Brown is associated with grounding, animal magic, stability, and balance.
White is associated with purification, cleansing, the full moon, new beginnings, healing, and spiritual growth.
Black is associated with protection, truth, outer space, banishing, and transition.
Decorating your home with colors that are meaningful to you can create a powerful magical space. You may also have your own color associations (for example, yellow is a very âhappyâ color for me), so feel free to incorporate those into your decor as well!
Growing Magical Houseplants
Most witches feel a very deep connection to nature and draw power from the natural world, but we canât all live in a cottage in the heart of the forest. Even if you live in a tiny apartment in the city, you can still bring nature into your space by keeping houseplants. Many popular houseplants have magical uses, and many popular magic herbs can be grown inside. Here are a few to get you started.
Aloe. This is one of my favorite plants. Aloe brings luck and protection, especially protection on an energetic/spiritual level. I like to keep aloe in my bedroom to protect me while I sleep, as well as to bring luck and inspiration while Iâm working at my desk.
Basil. Basil is very popular in money spells, and will attract prosperity and luck to your home. However, it also has protective properties â both spiritual protection and protection from bugs, since basil is a natural insect repellent! Basil can also be used in love spells, and is just generally a good plant to have around for good vibes.
African Violet. This flowering plant attracts positive spiritual energy into your space. It has associations with the moon and the water element, and is very good for promoting spirituality and psychic power.
Rosemary. Rosemary is one of those herbs that every witch should have on hand. Itâs so darn versatile, it can be used as a substitute for virtually any other herb, and can be used for almost any intention. Some of the most common magical associations for rosemary include: cleansing, purification, protection, healing, mental activity, and enhancing memory. According to author Deborah J. Martin, thereâs an old English saying that, âWhere rosemary grows, the woman rules the house.â Like basil, rosemary is a natural insect repellent.
Lavender. Lavender brings peace, love, and gentleness, which makes it a perfect addition to any home. It can be used in spells for cleansing and purification, enhancing psychic abilities, and stress relief. Lavender is also a powerful addition to love spells. Keeping lavender in the bedroom can aid in restful sleep, while lavender in the kitchen will bring harmony to the home.
Sage. Sage is the most talked about cleansing herb, and with good reason. Unfortunately, a lot of the sage bundles you can buy at metaphysical stores are made with white sage (Salvia apiana), which is sacred to Native American peoples and is endangered due to overharvesting. Instead of buying those, why not grow your own garden sage (Salvia officinalis), which has a lot of the same magical properties? Growing sage in your home will purify the space and protect those who live there. Sage also has an association with wisdom and mental prowess.
Hoya. Hoya is a common houseplant that youâve probably seen even if you donât know it by name. It has a distinctive appearance with waxy, dark green leaves and clusters of white, star-shaped flowers. Hoya aligns and balances the energy centers within your body, as well as in the surrounding space. Itâs associated both with grounding and with spiritual openness, so it can be great for balancing the two.
Peppermint. Peppermint has a variety of magical uses, but my favorite way to use it is for gently opening up blockages and getting things moving. Itâs great for cleansing, but is more gentle than rosemary or sage. Place it in any room where you tend to do a lot of healing work, or where you could use some peace and love. Peppermint is also used in dream magic, so growing it in the bedroom may bring on vivid or lucid dreams.
Orchid. Orchids are used in magic for love and lust. Historically, orchid has been used in folk medicine to promote male virility and âJezebel root,â used in American folk magic to attract wealthy male lovers, is a type of orchid root. If you live with a significant other, try growing an orchid in the bedroom to promote passion in your sex life. Otherwise, grow orchids in your home to promote love or to attract romance.
Catnip. If you have cats, theyâll love this one. Catnip is actually a type of mint, and has strong lunar associations. Itâs said to make one more charming and attractive, and is especially useful for attracting women. At the same time, catnip promotes courage and fierceness. It is also, of course, associated with cats and feline deities, so this is definitely a plant youâll want to keep around if the cat is one of your animal guides.
If you have a yard space that you can turn into an outdoor garden, your magical plant options are limited only by your local ecosystem. Some outdoor plants that have magical uses include roses, sunflowers, rue, lemon balm, and strawberries.
Creating an Altar
Altars are focal points of magical and spiritual energy. Many people, both witches and non-witches, find that having a designated space for their spiritual practice creates a deeper sense of sacredness and purpose.
An altar can serve lots of different purposes. Many witches use their altar as a magical work space to prepare spells, meditate, and do divination. You may choose to dedicate your altar to a deity, your ancestors, or some other spirit(s) you work with. You can also build altars for specific intentions, such as a money altar or a love altar â performing rituals at this altar everyday is a powerful method for manifestation. You altar may be some or all of these things, or it may just be a place to sit and connect with the spiritual.
You can set up an altar on any flat surface, like a shelf or table, or inside a container like a jewelry box. Your setup can be as simple or as elaborate as you like. An altar can be huge and complex, with statues and candles and flowers, or it can be as simple as a tealight and an incense burner. Itâs all about what appeals to you.
Resources:
New World Witchery pocast, âEpisode 143 â The Magical Homeâ
Southern Cunning: Folkloric Witchcraft in the American South by Aaron Oberon
Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner by Scott Cunningham
âCandle colors and their meaningsâ by Michelle Gruben on the Grove and Grotto blog
Green Witchcraft by Paige Vanderbeck
A Green Witchâs Cupboard by Deborah J. Martin
âThe Magic of Orchids in Wiccan Love Spells & Ritualsâ on the Art of the Root blog
complete silence is more distracting than background noise and you can fight me on this
let me explain, if I donât have background noise my brain will make itâs own background noise and Brain Background Noise is infinitely more distracting than Regular Background Noise
It's been awhile but I think I've finally found a groove in my bujo/planner. I'm also in love with the soft colors this week, to help combat the stress at work I've been feeling. Using @plan.tful daily/morning routine challenge last month was super helpful and so I expanded it to the full day this month. Reviewing and restructuring my time is exactly what I needed. Hashtags: #bujo #bulletjournal #magicofi #livecreatively #pashfam #projectmanager #scrummaster #plannernerd #plannergeek #plannergirl #plannerlove #plannersgonnaplan #planner #planneraddict #plannerobsessed #plannercommunity #plannerstickers #plannerwashi #plannerdecoration #plannerinspiration #plannerpeace #journal #journaling #journaladdict https://www.instagram.com/p/CDvGrLTpPgA/?igshid=w8ib4fv4u71g
Dead Poets Society (1989), quoting Henry David Thoreau.
reborn.
unless one character in the equation is a heinous asshole or something, i am entirely impervious to love triangles.Â
i live by the â____ has two handsâ meme motto
âoh no!! two friends fell in love with the same person, what will they do???? who will have to sacrifice their heart??â NOBODY, BITCH.Â
âa character thought their spouse was dead but they finally moved on and have a new spouse they love⌠but now the original spouse is back! who will bow out for the othersâ happiness??â I MEAN, ALL THREE OF THEM HAVE WEDDING RINGS ON ALREADYâŚ
âthis trio of adventurers have faced hell and high water together and developed incredibly deep bonds with each other during their quest, but now that their quest has come to a close, which two of them will settle down together?â COZY COTTAGES IN THE WOODS ARE BIG ENOUGH FOR THREE.
Kill the love triangle. Normalize polyamory.
please reblog if youâre a witch who is also a feminist
i want to follow you all!!
im serious about that âstop saving things for special occasionsâ bit tho like. even if u arenât in your 20s. thats for everyone. its one of the most useful things ive learned lately
stop! just stop. eat the special snack. drink the expensive hippie tea. use the incense or the bath bomb or whatever you paid way too much for because you were feeling really bad and retail therapy makes u feel alive
when we save things for special occasions/rainy days it contributes to us feeling like A.) our day to day existence is lackluster and B.) you have to be feeling a certain level of Bad, or have to reach a certain level of Socially Accepted Achievement, to enjoy things
just give yourself stuff. there are definitely sometimes reasons to withhold things from yourself - as motivation, if itâs something you consciously want to use sparingly, etc - but at least for me half the time it just turns into self-flagellation and also cool things and cool experiences and nice treats just collect dust while i wait for some fabled day when i convince myself i finally Deserve it
just fuckin give yourself stuff dude. lifeâs so mindblowingly short
my grandmother died having only used her china like twice in her life. during the year or so before her death, she was starting to package up and give things of hers to her kids, and gave mom the china while sighing âoh i wish i had used the china more!â and mom tried so hard to convince her to just keep it, then, and eat corny dogs off it if she wanted. she insisted she couldnât possibly, you need a special reason to use the fine china. when nana died, we used her fine china as our everyday dishes for years. i was 18 when she died, and never really stopped having that in the back of my head. now, when i hear myself say âi wish i had a reason to wear/do/eat/use X!â i hear nana regretting never really using her china. and let me tell you a thing: spaghettios taste great when eaten from fine china.
Iâve seen this post making the rounds. Just wanted to add something to it that my sister-in-law once told me:
âA âspecial thingâ can make any occasion special.â
She told me this when I objected to her opening a really expensive bottle of champagne just to watch a movie. And you know, she was right. The champagne was amazing and while we always sit around and watch movies, that bottle made that night a really special occasion that I will always remember.
So, cut yourself a little slack and remember that an ordinary day can become special.
So true and beautiful.
Add Some Oomph to Your Spells with Magical Timing
Like herbs, oils, and crystals, you donât need to work with magical timing for your spell to be successful. You can cast a spell at any time, no matter your intention, and get your desired results. However, working with the energy of the sun, moon, and days of the week can add an extra power boost to your magic.
Think of it this way: certain energies are dominant at certain times. Those energies are easier to connect with because they are closer at hand, so to speak, so you can bring them into your life and your spells more easily and in a more powerful way. That doesnât mean you canât call on other energies during these times â it just means that you may not connect to them quite so easily.
If you choose to work with magical timing in your spells, there are several yearly, monthly, weekly, and even daily cycles you can align your spells with.
The Cycle of the Sun: Solstices and Equinoxes
These are the turning points that mark the solar year, and are associated with the relationships between day and night, light and dark, summer and winter. Each solstice or equinox marks the end of one season and the beginning for the next. Because they are so rare and so potent, these days are a great time for your âbig pictureâ spells or for spells that need a big power boost.
Winter Solstice. The winter solstice marks the shortest day and longest night of the year, and falls between December 20 and December 23, depending on the year. In some pagan traditions the winter solstice, or Yule, marks the beginning of the new year â you may choose to set intentions for the coming year on this solstice. After the winter solstice, the nights start getting shorter and the days start getting longer â so spells related to healing and bringing things into the light are especially effective at this time of year. The winter solstice marks the end of the âdark halfâ of the year and beginning of the âlight halfâ of the year; at this point, our focus turns from inward reflection to outward manifestation. You may choose to think of the time between the winter solstice and spring equinox as a âplanning phase,â where you examine yourself and your desires, decide what you want to work on in the next year, and make plans for manifesting what you want.
Spring Equinox. An equinox occurs when the day and the night are exactly the same length, representing a perfect balance between light and dark. The spring equinox marks the beginning of spring and occurs between March 19 and March 22. The Christian holiday of Easter and the pagan holiday of Ostara are both related to the energy of this equinox. At this time of year, the natural world is coming back to life as winter begins to fade. Plants are beginning to grow, and baby animals are being born. This is a powerful time of year for fertility magic and any magic related to new beginnings. You may choose to think of the time between the spring equinox and the summer solstice as a âplanting phase,â where you âplant the seedâ of the things you want to manifest and begin doing the work to make it happen.
Summer Solstice. This solstice marks the longest day and shortest night of the year. It occurs between June 19 and June 23. As I am writing this post, we are coming up on the summer solstice (June 20, 2020). Life, fertility, and growth are at their peak during this time of year, which makes this solstice a perfect time for big manifestation spells. At the same time, this marks the end of the âlight halfâ and beginning of the âdark halfâ of the year, so after the summer solstice our energy shifts from outward manifestation to inward contemplation. You may choose to think of the time between the summer solstice and fall equinox as the âharvest phase,â where you reap the results of your hard work and manifest your desires in the physical world.
Autumn Equinox. This is the other time of year when the day and night are perfectly balanced. The autumn equinox occurs between September 19 and September 23 and marks the beginning of autumn. This is traditionally the time of year when crops are harvested, and many pagan groups celebrate harvest festivals around this time. Nature is beginning to die or go into hibernation in preparation for the coming winter. This is an especially powerful time of year for shadow work or for magic related to endings and transitions. You may choose to think of the time between the autumn equinox and the winter solstice as the âreflection phase,â when you retreat from the outside world to rest, focus on yourself, and do your inner work and self-healing.
Important Note: This post lists dates for the solstices and equinoxes in the Northern hemisphere. In the Southern hemisphere, the seasons are reversed. If you live in the Southern hemisphere, you would observe the winter solstice in June, the spring equinox in September, the summer solstice in December, and the fall equinox in March.
The Cycle of the Moon: Lunar Phases
If you donât have time to wait for the appropriate solstice or equinox, you can still connect with the cosmos in your magic. One of the biggest pros of the lunar cycle is that it happens roughly every month â so you never have to wait very long for the next full moon. The moon is also associated with magic and spirituality in several traditions, which makes it an especially powerful astral ally for witches.
New Moon. The new moon is when the moon is completely invisible in the night sky, and is the phase opposite the full moon. The new moon is a powerful time for shadow work (because it deals with things that are hidden) and for magic related to new beginnings.
Waxing Moon. The moon is waxing when it appears to be growing in the night sky; this is the phase between the new moon and full moon. This is a powerful time for any magic that deals with drawing something in, building something up, or strengthening something that already exists.
Full Moon. Many witches believe that the full moon is the most powerful time of month for any kind of magic. This is a good time to cast any spell that needs a serious power boost. The full moon is also an especially powerful time to release what no longer serves you or to work healing magic.
Waning Moon. The moon is waning when it appears to be shrinking in the night sky; this is the phase between the full moon and new moon. This is a powerful time for any magic that deals with sending something away, banishing negative energy, or bringing something to an end.
Dark Moon. The dark moon is the three day period immediately before the new moon. In some traditions, it is believed to be bad luck to cast spells during the dark moon. Other traditions hold that the dark moon is the best point in the lunar cycle for destructive magic, such as curses and hexes. Many modern witches donât recognize the dark moon as a separate moon phase at all. I personally like to use the dark moon as a time for self reflection, and may focus on shadow work during this time.
Magical Correspondences for the Days of the Week
The days of the week also have their own unique magical energies, and each day is linked to a certain planet and to certain deities.
Sunday. Sunday is, of course, connected to the Sun and solar deities. Sunday is the best day of the week for any manifestation magic that needs an extra boost. Its energy is also associated with healing, personal growth, power, and success.
Monday. Monday is associated with the Moon and lunar deities. Monday is a quiet, introspective day, and can feel very ethereal. Itâs the best day for magic related to intuition, nurturing, and shadow work.
Tuesday. Tuesday is associated with Mars and with gods and goddesses of war and action. (It is named for the Norse/Germanic god Tyr/Tiw.) Tuesday is a very âactiveâ day, and is good for magic related to action, activism, victory, or finding courage.
Wednesday. Wednesday is associated with Mercury and with gods and goddesses of wisdom, learning, and communication. (It is named for the Norse/Germanic god Odin/Wodan.) Wednesday is all about mental activity. Itâs the best day of the week for magic related to thought, travel, communication (written, spoken, or digital), and learning/study.
Thursday. Thursday is associated with Jupiter and with gods and goddesses of prosperity, wealth, and protection. (It is named after the Norse/Germanic god Thor.) Thursday, like Jupiter in astrology, is all about outward expansion. Itâs the best day of the week for magic related to career, prosperity, and wealth.
Friday. Friday is associated with Venus and with gods and goddesses of love, fertility, and sensuality. (It is named after the Norse goddess Freyja, or perhaps the goddess Frigg.) The energy of Friday is fun, lighthearted, and sexy. Itâs the best day of the week for magic related to love, beauty, and sex/sexuality.
Saturday. Saturday is associated with Saturn and with time and wisdom. (The day and the planet are both named after the Roman god Saturn.) Saturday is practical and wise, but it does have a little bit of a dark side. Itâs the best day of the week for magic related to banishing and protection.
Magical Times of Day
Okay, so youâd like to start working with magical timing, but what about emergency magic and last-minute spells? What if you donât have time to wait for the next full moon, or even the next Sunday? You can still align your spell with magical timing! There are several moments of power each day, and each has its own magical associations.
Sunrise. Sunrise is, of course, the birth of the new day. This makes it the perfect time for spells related to new beginnings or expanded possibilities.
Noon. This is the peak or high point of the day. This is a powerful time for healing magic.
Sunset. Sunset is the end of the day, and forms a gateway between light and dark. This is a great time for spells related to accepting endings, releasing that which does not serve, and moving on from the past.
Midnight. If noon is the peak of the day, then midnight is the peak of the night. Midnight has a very ethereal, transformational energy. Like with the full moon, some witches believe that any spell will be more powerful if cast at midnight. This is a powerful time for both banishing and attraction magic.
Resources:
You Are Magical by Tess Whitehurst
Green Witchcraft by Paige Vanderbeck
Wicca for Beginners by Thea Sabin [specifically the chapter on the sabbats]
Qabalah Made Easy by David Wells [Note: Qabalah is based on an appropriation of Jewish mysticism, and I am NOT endorsing its practice. However, much of the magical timing associations used in modern witchcraft is shared with Qabalah and other forms of ceremonial magic, which is why itâs referenced here.]
You go girl!
Sabbat Skincare
One just-for-fun way that Iâve been celebrating the Wheel of the Year, especially this year in lockdown, is with seasonally-themed skincare. Itâs been working out really well, too. It isnât hard to find or make face masks, scrubs, balms, etc. that either incorporate traditional/symbolic food items or are, at least, seasonally-scented, and it provides a nice, immersive supplement to candles, rituals, etc. â particularly if you arenât big on decorating or dressing up.
Here are some ideas of which ingredients to look for when:
Samhain: Literally anything and everything pumpkin. Could also use apple or pomegranate, though my preference is to reserve those for Mabon. Cinnamon. Chai. Caramel. Basically, if you put it in a Starbucks drink this time of year, you can put it on your face. Charcoal could also be an option. But I sometimes use that in the summer, instead, because of I personally associate it more with barbeques. If youâre thinking more creatively, perhaps a volcanic lava scrub or a âwarmingâ face mask (which, depending on how far north you live, could feel pretty good this time of year).
Yule: Pine. Winterberry. Peppermint. Egg nog. Gingerbread. Cranberry. Typically âChristmasyâ stuff. I tend to use oranges more at Litha, but these can also be traditional at Yule (e.g. in wassail).
Imbolc: Milk. For example, dried or condensed milk mixed into a bath, goatâs milk moisturizer,  milk-âscentedâ sheet masks (can find these sometimes from Korean and Japanese beauty brands). Yogurt. Cream. Plant-based milk substitutes, like almond milk or coconut oil also work. Itâs harder to find stuff thatâs âseedâ-based, but sometimes youâll stumble across chia seed skincare, and the like. Maybe pear, if you prefer something fruity.
Ostara: Eggs. Green tea or matcha. Light floral scents, like violet or sweetpea. Tumeric. Mud. Clay.
Beltane: Honey. Lavender. Oat or oatmeal. Basically ALL the florals, but particularly hibiscus, jasmine, or rose.
Litha: Lemon. Orange. Watermelon. Strawberry. Blueberry. Aloe vera. Coconut. Pineapple. Peach. Fancy âmineral waterâ sprays or facial steams, if thatâs your thing. A menthol-based âfreezingâ mask (which, though it definitely feels better this time of year, could also correspond with a winter holiday). In general, think beach and/or pool party.
Lughnasadh/Lammas: Wine (youâd be surprised!). Grape. Chocolate. Blackberry. Raspberry. Wheatgerm. âVeggieâ-type skincare, because of the first harvest, so carrots, tomato, cucumber, radish, etc.
Mabon: Apple. Pomegranate. Anything nut-based/themed/scented (including almond oil!). Elderberry. Epsom or Dead Sea salt for protection. Gold or other metals in a mask or moisturizer, if you can afford it.
And, obviously, this is just a jumping-off point. Please comment if you have more suggestions!
You are not a bad writer if your heroine is soft or feminine or easily frightened or physically weak.
You are not a bad writer if your heroine finds herself depending on a man in some way.
You are not a bad writer if your heroine chooses love/a man over another aspect of her life.
You are not a bad writer if your heroine places her love life in the center of her focus.
You are not a bad writer if your sex scenes are âunrealisticallyâ amazing.
You are not a bad writer if you decide to make your villain love interest âunrealisticallyâ kind to the heroine.
You are not a bad writer if you make an original female character protagonist.
You are not a bad writer for being self-indulgent.
You know what the real cliches are?
Stories in which we take humanity and vulnerability away from our heroines in order to conform to a âStrong Female Characterâ standard that isnât actually real, and is instead emotionally stifling said characters (and the audience by-proxy).
Stories in which the heroine acts unrealistically independent and emotionally distant, when mostly likely every female reader would rather she fall into the love interestâs arms.
Stories in which we force male villains into dramatic âabuserâ boxes because we think it would be âunrealisticâ or âOOCâ for them to choose to be respectful or kind to a female character (sometimes even despite canon evidence to the contrary).
Stop forcing yourself to conform to rules that arenât real and start setting yourself free to express your story genuinely. I see so many authorâs notes where fic authors are quietly panicking over the audienceâs potential judgement over their choices, so much obsessive tailoring of  ideas to conform to what they think the audience will accept. So many notes where the author is trying so hard not to make a âpathetic mary-sueâ out of a female character, begging reviewers to tell them if they failed. So many villain fangirls who are obsessively trying to prove to the world that yes they know their fave is the villain, and so they go out of their way to make him a bigger asshole than he was in exactly the ways that are inappropriate for a romantic fic. I even see stories where the author deliberately forces herself to write mediocre sex, seemingly because âitâd be more realisticâ rather than because she wanted to depict that kind of a scene.
Most of the time, it really seems like these authors are intentionally avoiding what they actually want to write, because they are afraid theyâd be poor writers if they were too self-indulgent. we spend so much time enforcing some nebulous standard of ârealismâ onto ourselves that we forget to truly enjoy the act of storytelling, or indeed inject unnecessary cynicism into the story.
None of that is real. Itâs a made up thing in your head. Men tell hilariously terrible self-indulgent nonsense without regard for the judgement of an audience and make millions of dollars doing it all the damn time.
Tell the story you really want to tell.