i woke up around 11am and my first meal was around 1pm or 2pm, i suppose - 80cal of pumpkin. and i drank some milo at maybe 3? which was around 60cal. and i havent taken in much if not any protein so far. then my next meal was around 4pm, where i made mug cinnamon rolls (300cal) which was superrrrr high in sugar and this SURPRISINGLY left me soooo full that my next big meal was at 9+pm. in between that i simply ate some pumpkin seeds i was roasting. (70cal?) then my next meal was at around 930pm – i ate 3 eggs, 2 slices of toast and tuna (500cal). i wasn’t even hungry and i simply ate because i didn’t want my body to lack energy (tho i felt super energetic). and to my surprise, at this moment, i still had about 450 cal left for the rest of the night?? i didn’t even think about eating, like i usually did almost everyday. this made me realize how much i thought about eating every day other than today. i realized i literally count the hours til i get to eat again bc i just wanna eat. but i never let myself think i’m hungry bc i’m in denial or something. makes me wonder if i’m actually putting enough food in my body or i’m just dieting like crazy. makes me wonder if thats the reason why my period hasn’t come. makes me worried, bc all i want is to be good to my body and to nourish it with the food it NEEDS, not any less. (tho i wanna lose about 1kg more). and so after that 930pm meal, i realized i was low on my protein intake, so at 1130pm i chugged 45g of protein powder dissolved in water (pictured^) and it felt kinda disorientating and gross and not right….. now it’s 335am and i’m fking wide awake in bed. and i gotta get up in 3 hours for an important meeting…. i rlly needa stop and evaluate this for a moment. :(
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