tumblr has honestly been a way bigger part of my life than i would ever admit to my irl friends. i've spent years on this crazy website and i now have a wonderful community and online friends that truly mean so much to me. i am so incredibly grateful for everyone who has supported me on this journey.
if we're being honest, i've lost a lot of my interest for anime and tumblr. i actually really tried to hold onto it, but i just couldn't do it. i hit a wall with writing, i lost touch with some people important to me, and i've found other interests and dont find anime nearly as appealing anymore.
and so, i'm logging off. i'll still be lingering around here for a while, but eventually, i will end up poofing out. i wont be completely gone, however, as i've made a new blog for interactions! no writing - there are just some people who i dont want to let go of. moots, please dm me on either tumblr to receive the new blog if you'd like to keep in touch. even if we haven't talked in a while, i'd really like to stay friends!
im sorry for the dramatic wording and long message, but this is really marking the end of an era for me. i hope you all have a lovely day!
୧ ˚₊ EVERYBODY’S FALLING IN LOVE ( AND I’M FALLING BEHIND ) — itoshi sae
he has never been a lover, but the day he met you, he finally found what love felt like.
itoshi sae has never been a lover, because love has never been his cup of tea. it certainly not his thing to love, or do anything related to this word; he just dislikes it, for it leaves a sour taste in his mind. he has seen people around him fall in love, be so infatuated with the very thought of it, while dopey and lovesick grins stay on their faces.
and in that sense, itoshi sae is not a lover.
love to him is like a sour candy, too sour to contemplate that it might leave your taste buds numb for a while. love to him is fragile, and it is not in him to take care of delicate things, and a thing like that, he might just back out as is. he doesn’t like the way makes you weak, he’d rather be brave and have a harsh front rather than a soft and gentle one.
love is for the weak in his dictionary, it is for people who don’t have any strengths, to him love is just a mere words, a meaningless and a waste of time, to itoshi sae love is just a hindrance, nothing more or nothing less.
but sometimes a change of perspective could bring one to have a different view, and that was what brought itoshi sae to think about the world love again, a new point of view he gathered through a dreamy lens, one that was conjured up by the likes of you, a certain someone that brought him to like the way love felt.
a lot changed the day he met you, quite like a slap to his face ( literally ).
flashing cameras and crowding paparazzis are all he sees, they are quite blinding for sae, but he is used to bright lights and this lifestyle, having been a self made prodigy, he was surrounded by cameras and paparazzis. but he hated having eyes on him, for then he couldn’t have a life out of this captured world.
it’s always an article where he has been shammed or either an article which quite literally ensues rumours of him being a womaniser — having a new girl at his arm every week. it leaves a bitter taste in his mind to even think about such absurdities, so this time he was by himself at the latest football gala, a party for all the new club members to be exact.
sae finds it hard to be in the focus of everyone, men and women alike all like to be around him, but women are more to throw themselves at him, he despises the very fact such women exist. strained and fake smiles are all he shows, jaw clenched as he talks with men with mindset’s so different, five glasses of wine have been emptied by him since the time of arrival.
so soon he finds himself wanting fresh air, a breather from all this chaos, he finds a way out as soon as the lights dim and all focus on the stage in the room. he is silent as a predator is, and as good as an escape artist to make such an escapade but seems like the gods were not in his right, for as soon as he turns the corner, his cheek meets with a hand and it begins to sting.
never in a million years had itoshi sae thought of getting smacked in the entirety of the premiere.
“oh my gosh! i’m so sorry! i thought you were a stalker or something!” it’s a heavy accent he realises but the stinging on his cheek overlooks anything that happens around him. he shakes his head focusing at the voice at hand, but his heart almost leaps out of his chest at the sight before him.
( e.c ) eyes that gleam with worry as it seems to etch itself upon your features, you bite your lip in distress as you take notice of the red mark on his cheek, but his eyes are set on the way you bite your lip and he gulps, heart thumping in his chest. you observe his face that is just looking at you in awe, and as he looks into your eyes he realises you have no clue of who he was.
“i’m so so sorry!” the voice of yours breaks his stupor and the ache upon his cheek returns — it sure was a hard slap. you gulp as you see him fix his jaw, you swallow hard, the way he was suited up to the nines made you figure out that he was much more than just a creep; he looked famous.
your blood runs cold at the thought. your heart racing in your chest, as you await any loud gesture or shout for guards, or anything related to you being thrown out made your head spin.
“it’s alright, i was the one that turned the corner unannounced.” and sae is bamboozled at the words that slip past him, he looks at you, his eyes wide, and he notices your tense demeanour relax. a heavy sigh escaping briefly past your lips as you look up at him with a smile.
“but i-, um, i still apologise for the inconvenience.” you awkwardly chuckle, not cool [name], not cool, a voice rings in your head as you bite your tongue. it is then you make eye contact with him, his eyes are quite unlike any, and to him, yours were better than any. sae likes the way your eyes look like a hazy dream, he likes the way his reflection looks back at him through your eyes.
and in the moment he realised that he liked the way you looked at him, for you saw him for him, and not for the famous persona of his.
and since then, it’s been encounters here and there, finding each other at places you thought you’d never, bumping shoulder in areas one could have never fathomed. it turns from light glances to lingering ones, timid laughter turns into ones filled with nothing but genuine joy, small talks turn into conversation that ring through coffee shops.
then one hangout at his place, turns into a date at a place you like. then one date turns into two, then three, then four and soon they turn into long nights spend at your cost apartment, to ranging from movie nights at his. longing touches turn into never letting go of you, kisses that were once pressed onto his cheeks begin to linger upon his lips.
but itoshi sae was not a lover, so he never named the thing you had with him, but he liked that way you felt in his arms, he liked the way you fit right with him, he liked the taste of your lips on his, he liked the way you were his, yet not for him to keep.
for love was not meant for him, so then why did his heart ache at the thought of seeing you go. the mere thought of you being with another was like a nightmare to him, the very thought of you not being his, was utter torture for the said male.
yet here he was, a coward, he once again was a little boy who was scared to face the world to early, and love was once again becoming the victor and he could not accept defeat. he has watched many flourish within love, yet it wasn’t in him to be able to bear this sweet fruit of entanglement.
“you’re kind of stupid, you know that sae.” and for a moment, oliver aiku sounded right, he sounded to be much more truthful in the heat of the moment than he ever could be, much more better than itoshi sae was what oliver aiku had become in that instance. “certainly you look like a coward to me right now.”
and those were the last words, sae had heard from oliver before he was up on his feet, they ached as he rushed to your house, panting and huffing as he finds the door to your house to be right before him, shaky hands tremble in fear to press the doorbell, heart racing, he liked you, so what was there to fear in that.
as soon as his trembling hands press the bell and the door to your house opens, it takes everything in him to stop him from pressing his lips against yours. you were the only thing matter to him the most, in present and in future, you’ll be the sole thing that he’d like to call his forever and ever.
that fickle day itoshi sae had learnt so much more. he had learnt that love was not for the weak but for people who knew what strengthened them to the core. he learned that love was not bitter or sour, it was just missing from the right person and when you fall in love with the one that you know is true, you’ll know how sweet is the taste of the fruit.
and for the first time in forever, he was falling behind in any prospect anymore, especially in the case of love, for he had you.
the sole thing the brought him to a purpose he could have never known.
i like a chase, and itoshi sae is a man who certainly hates the idea of love but internally wishes to find just the right one ;)
NOIRFLMS 2023 ! all rights reserved - plagiarism is a crime , do not translate my works without permission. REBLOG MORE PLEASE !
so as some of you may know, i haven't exactly been active lately. at first, that was unintentional, as i was getting pretty busy, but it slowly just got more exhausting to log on and i just honestly couldn't deal with it. also not fun to feel fear and worry at seeing an ask notif from my inbox and have to worry if it was my fav hater 😚
im really, really sorry for just dropping out without a word. idk if anyone cares tho ? tbh? but wtv ANYWAYS
im thinking about closing this acc down for good. i've honestly lost interest in writing fics and anime, and i feel like im trying to hold onto something really hard just because i have fond memories of it, even though i no longer particularly enjoy it. i might make another acc to interact with moots and read from time to time, but that may or may not happen.
honestly, what it boils down to is that i just dont find tumblr or honestly just anime in general to be fun anymore, and thats ok. it just means ive found other interests and things that i place more importance in.
if i choose to deactivate/archive this acc, i'll make a more official post saying so.
just wanna make sure ur warned for how much I FUCKING LOVE FANTASIZE BY ARI OUR QUEEN DESPITE BEING A VIRGIN I HAVENT EVEN HAD MY FIRST KISS YET BUT I STILL BE SCREAMING THOSE LYRIC AS IF I RELATE LIKE ITS JUST SO GOOD AND HITS SO HARD AND ITS JUST SO YES ?!?!?!
“(y/n), truth or dare.” baji smirked as the bottle pointed to you. you rolled your eyes at the sinister look baji was giving you before nodding. “truth.”
“pussy.” “just ask the question.” baji hummed in thought before letting out a wolfish grin.
“do you like someone right now? like a crush.” you weren’t fazed, you knew that having baji as a best friend would lead to being asked this question. baji’s always been invasive with asking and you never once minded. but now that said person you liked was in the vicinity, you couldn’t help but look away and nod.
“eh?! who?” chifuyu couldn’t help but prod for details. “a friend.” you respond curtly, not knowing that mikey’s big black eyes were staring right through you, awaiting for your answer.
“a friend?!” chifuyu parroted. you nod once, not indulging more into the conversation, but toman wasn’t done yet.
“who?” you roll your eyes “if you want to know, you have to wait for the bottle to point to me again.” you say as you reach for the bottle, giving it a spin.
you hear the groans of the group reverberate in the room, but stop once the bottle lands on poor takemichi who hesitantly chose dare.
the dare he had to do was promised to never be retold.
all through the night, the bottle never landed on you once more, keeping your secret crush intact and their curiosities peaked.
“why do you need to talk to me, baji?” you asked as baji pulls you over to the side, baji looked at you a bit worriedly before he heaves out a sigh.
“(y/n)...” “what?” you were so confused at this point. you had no idea what baji was thinking nor do you have any idea what he wanted to talk about.
“about this… friend that you like.” you tilt your head to the side, still confused as you gestured for him to keep going.
“are you sure you’d want to tell him how you feel?” “what?”
“don’t make me say it.” “keisuke, i am genuinely really confused right now. just tell me.”
“i don’t like you that way.”
“huh?”
baji sighs out, as if he were explaining to a child. “look… i know we’re close, and that we’re considered best friends but you need to realize that i only see you as that. nothing more, nothing less.” “kei–” “like, bro, i know i’m attractive. but i can’t recipro–” “keisuke–” “–cate your feelings, it wouldn’t be fair…” “baji, that’s no–” “look, i know you can find someone else, someone actually deserving of your love, but that’s just not me… so i’m so sor–” you cut him off with a slap to his cheek.
he looked at you, scandalized, as if you murdered his first born. he looked at you as if he were asking what the fuck was that? and you raised a brow at him.
“and where did you even get the disgusting rumor that i’m in love with you?”
“you’re not?” “gross.” “hey!” baji cleared his throat. “but didn’t you say that you liked a friend?”
“keisuke… you’re not the only friend i have.” you deadpanned, internally scoffing at the audacity he had.
“if it isn’t me, then who?” “none of your business.”
“(y/n), you don’t need to hide what you feel, but just know i can’t return those feelings. you don’t need to lie but i think it would be better for me to tell you strai–” “keisuke, shut the fuck up.”
you rubbed your temples, feeling a headache coming up at the baseless confidence that was budding in your best friend.
“i like mikey. okay? now stop it with the assumptions, you’re giving me the shivers.” “mikey?!” baji’s jaw dropped, “as in, sano manjiro? the leader of toman? my childhood best friend? that mikey?!” you roll your eyes at his dramatics before nodding and vocalizing an exasperated yes.
“now will you shut the fuck up and stop?” baji nods, before a terrifying smirk enters his features, before you could even question him about it, he spoke in a loud voice, obviously talking to someone besides you.
“aww. i wanted to keep up the charade longer, but i guess there’s no point in overthinking.” you were about to call him crazy.
“i told you she likes you back, mikey.”
your eyes widened as you fling your head back, jaw dropping at the sight of the fearsome toman leader with red cheeks adorning his normally soft features.
“wha– how– keisuke–!” a firm pat on your shoulder was placed before baji walked away, nudging mikey on the side and slapping the back of his head, hearing him bid the leader good luck before leaving.
the silence was suffocating. it would be so laughable that the usually loud sano manjiro was reduced to a quiet, blushing, idiot.
“so–” you cursed at the crack in your voice. “uh…”
“you like me, huh?” you gulped, feeling your face burn, his lips twitch into a smile as he realizes that your silence means yes. and all the blonde wants to do is kiss you silly. but he needed to milk this out.
it wasn’t everyday that the sano manjiro has his feelings reciprocated, but what would he know? he’s only had his eyes set on you from the very beginning.
“hm? why can’t you answer me, (n/n)-chin.” you didn’t even realize that mikey was already right in front of you, a smirk on his face as his fingers were under your chin, forcing you to look up at him.
“ne, (n/n)-chin, do you like me?” you remained mute, willing your racing heart to calm down. but knowing that you were not about to let yourself be embarrassed by his teasing, you took a step forward, catching him off guard.
“eh? but what about you, i did hear baji saying that you liked me back.” you gave him a sickly sweet smile.
at this point, it was a battle of who would cave in first. you knew that you would win, because if there was anything to know about mikey, is that he stakes his claim the first opportunity given.
“i do.” he gives no hesitation as he pulls you closer, foreheads touching as he whispers out, smile still on his face now.
“you’re mine now. (y/n).” as he dips you down and presses a peck on your pouty lips.
you pull away, as if he had cooties before pushing him away. mikey was hurt, but before he could express it, you pushed him on the wall behind him, a smile on your face.
“you’ve got it all wrong, sano manjiro.” you purred sweetly, hands cupping his cheeks before you placed a deep peck on his lips, smirking at the way he chased after your lips after you pull away.
“you’re mine now, manjiro.” you say before he pulls you back to his lips, twin smiles on your faces as you pull him closer.
sano manjiro was undefeated, everyone knows that. he’s the boss. he’s always on top, but damn, he doesn’t mind being under your control.
notes: wow i can't believe i managed to write something despite my schedule but whEW hi mikey *tucks hair behind ears* i think mikey grew on me a bit too late but all of you better expect me to be writing for him often bc this man!! won't!! get!! out!! of!! my!! head!!
"how many times do i have to say it? no" nagi breathes out, barely even acknowledging your presence as he continues to play on his computer in his dorm room
with a loud huff, loud enough for him to hear even with his headphones on, you flop down at his bed, sprawling your arms around as you stare up at his ceiling
"c'mon sei! i'm literally almost legal but yet i still don't even have a first boyfriend, let alone a first kiss!" you complained, throwing your hands over you face
you see nagi shrug before retorting something along the lines of 'what does that have to do with me'
"nagiiiiii" you drag out, hoping to get a reaction from him. to which, you do get a reaction from him! his signature look of boredom.
"fine. i'll help you"
"yay" you clapped your hands
"only if you buy me 5 battlepasses and whatever i want on the nightmarket" nagi bargains
with a deep sigh, you agree "fine!"
after a bit of more complaining to nagi that you were infact bitchless for most of your life and you're getting a little desperate to get some action as you are a junior in college and two, most of your other friends that isn't nagi are in relationships which makes you a tad bit jealous that you are gonna die alone anyway without getting some any action
you don't know how you even got to this point of the conversation where whether or not nagi has or had been in relationships but here you are now
"so wait, let me get this straight.." you pause, holding your palm out as a way of making nagi pause whatever he's mumbling about, "you already kissed someone?"
nagi shrugs again, "it was only because of some spin the bottle shit reo made me play at some party we went to"
"so that makes you experienced then?"
"not really"
"but you already have your first kiss?"
"i guess?"
"then you are experienced!"
nagi gives you a puzzled look as he lies down next to you. "what do you want me to do then?" he asked, just so he can be done with it
"i want you to teach me how to kiss" you turn to look at him with a glint of your eyes that basically screams "i am determined to get the perfect first kiss with someone i will pursue"
nagi looks dumbfounded at your completely bizarre request. he looked at you like you just grew a second head
"what the fuck"
in the end nagi does eventually give in (not because you totally bribed him again into buying him an entire collection worth of items at his nightmarket and some battlepasses that could easily be around 3 months worthwhile)
so now here you were, seated across from nagi, ready to learn how to kiss and what better way to learn than to ask your best (and only) friend at your college!
"so do i just close my eyes or..?" you start, beginning to feel self aware at the situation that you brought yourself onto
"i'd prefer that" nagi retorts, making you giggle a bit because of how funny he sounded
"okay.. okay" you breathe, closing your eyes as you slowly start leaning in.
"... my eyes are now closed"
for the record, nagi didn't really mind nor care if you opted to opening your eyes while doing this whole thing but he just doesn't want to see you see him all worked up
"i'm leaning in" nagi warns you, so that you won't feel like he's being invasive or all that funky shit. basically he just didn't want you to get the wrong idea
and so, your lips meet.
"congrats, you got your first kiss" nagi casually says as not even a millisecond later, he pulls away and moves to the other side of his bed
"nagi! that was barely even a kiss!"
"how would you know if you never had it before this?" he retorts, making you heat up in partial embarrassment because it was true that you didn't have your first kiss yet and the other reason being which that he was technically your first kiss
"i-i just know, okay damn it!" you stammered, "let's do it again!"
"if you want to kiss me that badly just say so" nagi attempts to make a joke to lighten up the dampen mood but from what you think, he just worsened the whole situation
"haha very funny nag–" before you could even finish your sentence, nagi crashes his lips against yours.
instinctively you placed your hands over his chest to which he places them over his neck, giving him more room to suck your face off.
you may or may not have accidentally moaned in the midst of this activity you two were doing which prompted into something more
you were now laying flat at his bed with him hovering you. still not breaking the kiss whatsoever. his shirt long gone, now at the floor. everything was going smooth
that is until reo decides it would be the most perfect time to barge in to tell nagi about how he just got a new pair of soccer shoes that were issued at the latest soccer magazine
"nagi! you'll never believe what i just got! it's the one messi just wore at the cover of– JESUS CHRIST"
reo basically shrieked, shielding his eyes with said magazine.
you and nagi basically separated. your eyes dart to nagi's shirtless body and to reo who was looking between you and nagi. just in time for a hypothetical light bulb to pop up at the top of his head
"oh.. i'm just gonna" reo throws his thumb back at nagi's door and dashes out before yelling "be safe you two!"
when the door closes, you and nagi both sigh in relief that he was gone but the damage was done
"well.."
"uhh.." you fiddled with your fingers, unable to look at nagi in the eye.
"how was that then as your first lesson?" as always, nagi just seems to find a way to try and cut the atmosphere although this time, it worked.
"it was a splendid demonstration. i'll rate it a 8/10" you applaud
nagi crawls over to you with a small mischievous glint in his eyes. he traps you in between his arms as he stares down at you.
"just an 8?"
feeling a little frisky, and obviously enjoying what was going on earlier right before reo interrupted, you decide that maybe learning from nagi wouldn't hurt a thing or two
you throw your hands over nagi's neck before responding to him
"could you show me how you did that thing earlier with your tongue again? i couldn't quite get that" you say in a fake curious tone making nagi chuckle
"okay. let me demonstrate it to you again. thoroughly" nagi whispers before catching your lips with his.
you went to school with nagi's hoodie the next day and people (and reo) could only guess why
+ contents: fluff, you and reo bickering like an old married couple | notes: happy reo day <3 here's a quick reo drabble for you guys
being roommates with reo means every day you had to suffer his little teasings whether it be about your height, your clothes, or even how you didn’t understand a certain subject. you’ve been subjected to these teasings almost every day since the first day you have gotten to know him.
most importantly, you and reo have different opinions on furniture and how you both decorate the living room you share.
“y/n, please let me use the fucking blanket. what's the point of the blanket being on the couch if it can't be used?" reo desperately asks, pointing at the blanket you bought just a few days ago.
"it's for show!" you replied. “do you not understand accessories on couches?”
"oh for the love of god-" reo groans, running a hand through his hair. “it’s just going to be useless if we don’t use it!”
you frowned, crossing your arms. “what do you mean ‘useless’? you just don’t understand aesthetics, do you? the blanket compliments the couch really well.”
reo lets out a sigh. “i’ve seen you use the blanket like once or twice, how come when i want to use it you won’t let me?”
“well-” you stuttered, thinking up of an excuse. reo raises an eyebrow, patiently waiting for you to answer him. “that was just once. i was basically almost freezing to death waiting for you to come home because you were taking so long to bring home food!”
“what- hey, it wasn’t my fault you asked me to buy food for you when i was in the middle of practice,” reo points out, and knowing you were basically at fault for that, you huffed, looking away. “see? i’m right, so i can use the blanket whenever i want to.” reo sits on the couch and takes the blanket, placing it over his legs.
you quickly sat down next to him, pulling part of the blanket over your own legs. “well, since we’re sharing blankets now, let’s watch a movie.” you gave him a big smile, handing the remote control to reo.
“really? you’re all smiley now that we’re sharing blankets?” reo asks in disbelief, a small smile appearing on his face. “well then, let’s binge-watch the series you’re currently watching.”
“yeah!” you replied cheerfully.
taglist: @kitorin @lazyalani @seehaven @peachesncats @saesins @beanxiv @starthz @yuzurins @auroratumbles @heartsoji @kryscent ♡ (send an ask if you want to be added!)
“no,” you told him softly, carefully cupping his cheeks so he wasn’t going to doze off on your shoulder. “no, reo.”
reo whines quietly, though his sounds of dejectedness are muffled when you softly squish his cheeks. his eyelids are drooping, a clear sign that he was quite close to falling asleep right then and there, and what confused him is that, usually, you almost always let him rest his head on your shoulder whenever he felt sleepy when you two aren’t home.
but the thing was, you two were home, and he’s been denied in the comfort of your home?
now? you were denying him like this?
he’s heartbroken.
did you not love him anymore?
how could you deny him such a privilege? to lay his head on your shoulder and enjoy your attention?
he thinks he’s overthinking it and being too dramatic about it.
he visibly deflates, his hands holding onto your arms softly, giving you such pleading eyes as if he were a kicked puppy on the side of the street.
“you should rest your head on my lap instead,” you said, shrugging off your laptop to the vacant nightstand beside you. “i don’t know why you always choose to lay your entire weight on me when we have a perfectly comfortable, spacious bed.”
“because you’re much more comfortable,” he murmurs, happily shifting his position so he could lay his head on your lap. he sighs quietly, content, and he swears he felt what it felt like to be on cloud nine when you combed your fingers through his hair—he made a sound of happiness that sounded similar to a purr.
“so clingy,” you tut with a soft chuckle, booping his cheek with your free hand. “like a cat, a very clingy, spoiled cat.” you coo.
he doesn’t even bother to fight your teasing because reo knows this like the back of his hand, he knows it’s true.
his eyes slowly drifted close, sleep overcoming him, and the last thing he could make out was your soft humming that resembled the tune of a lullaby. he could be called clingy and spoiled all day every day, but that’s how it goes, right? whatever reo wants, he gets. that’s sort of like his motto in life.
and now that you love him as much as he loves you, what could he ever want more in this life?
note. @kirameki-kumo, for you! i love how most of my reo works are from your entries <3
he's always been kind of a solitude-y guy. he lasted years alone in spain, and honestly, doesnt really enjoy the company of most other people much. he's always felt that he'd be better off alone.
but for some reason, youre the sole exception. he never thought a day would come when he'd be excited to leave soccer to go see someone. he never thought he'd ever love someone as much as he loves you, either. he never thought he'd nearly tear a door off its hinges to lunge into someones arms as they massage his scalp, but here he is, doing just that, and enjoying it more than he could ever express with words.
and for some reason, he's completely content with knowing that he was wrong to think that solitude is better than company. because he knows that he cant do anything alone that would be more fun than doing it with you.
and though he's not good at saying it, he loves you so much. he loves you so much that he'd rather be watching some dumb show with you than practicing soccer alone, and that says a whole lot.
