Witchy Shit

Bi plant witch.

[catchymemes]

When Dad shops for a tree without mom

[hydro-homies]

@Nestlé

[str0kethebigtree-deactivated202]

how sauced do you gotta be to go from "the government can't take my guns!!!" to "actually the second amendment shouldn't apply to non-citizens". like. you know who decides who gets to be a citizen, right?

[marxism-himboism-deactivated202]

These are the same people who claim to be “anti-government” while riding around with Blue Lives Matter and pro-military stickers slapped on the bumpers of their cars and see no irony in it

[gold-5tandard27]

[thelvadams]

people really complaining about rey’s backflip being unrealistic, as if this never happened:

[nezumionice]

I’M CACKLING WHAT THE FUCK HE JUST WENT NYOOM

[feralkwe-deactivated20210912]

ppl take Star Wars far more seriously than it was ever meant to be taken.

[saiyef]

Yeah, super speed is a thing in Star Wars. Force-users use the Force to buff their physical capabilities. Did people really not notice? The Prequels were filled with nothing but the Jedi jumping around doing flips. Why would people have an issue with Rey doing flips?

[flootzavut]

Rey made the fatal mistake of doing flips whilst being a girl.

[disasterasexual]

Boobs throw off the physics of magic flips, dontcha know?

[buffaliengirlfriend]

the newlywed game but with superheros and their sidekicks.

[buffaliengirlfriend]

the host: what does robin love to eat after a night of fighting crime?

9 yr old dick grayson: a pb&j, with crunchy peanut butter and strawberry jelly on whole wheat, the crust cut off, and the sandwich cut into squares!!

bruce: turns his sign around to reveal ‘the most specific peanut butter and jelly sandwich on earth.’

[kid-crashed]

Young Wally West: EVERYTHING!!

Barry: turns his sign around to reveal ‘if it’s food, he is eating it’

[failedclone]

Conner: Ass

Clark: [Turns his sign around to reveal “Something wildly inappropriate”]

[koriandrstongue-deactivated2019]

Tim: Coffee

Producer: That’s not a -

Tim: I am eating the coffee beans from the J A R

Bruce: [looks more dead inside than usual and turns his sign around to read “something dangerously unhealthy and probably caffienated”]

[nitghowl1600]

Jason: He wouldn’t even know

Bruce: [Turns his sign to reveal ‘He’s thinks I won’t know but its chili dogs]

Jason: FUCK

[cipheramnesia]

Every night Batman memorize ten specific sidekick facts just in case he needs to mercilessly drag any of them in ten words or less.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[valtsv]

idk why but there the funniest thing in the world to me is taking normal words and switching around the first and/or last letters to make Silly Words like maybe i just have a terrible sense of humor but that's the comedy jackpot as far as i'm concerned

[valtsv]

me: i am a complex person with a sophisticated sense of humor

boosegumps:

me:

[ourstrangeduet]

if hozier was 5’10 with short hair hed be nothing

[buddymcpal]

How dare u assume hozier is tied to a physical form

[ourstrangeduet]

U dont get to transcend physical form just by singing indie music

[smoqueen-deactivated20251108]

If you people listened to king crimson your heads would explode

[twostepsfromtemerant]

Despite a lot of Hozier’s songs having sexual overtones, his music isn’t immediately associated with sex, or called crude. Common reactions  to mentioning him, depending on who you are talking to are “bogman!” or ‘that guy who did Take Me to Church”. Even though his music is just as sexual as pop music written by male artists, it isn’t immediately recognized as such because of how he shifts the power dynamics to favor women. In this essay I will…

[chronolith]

wait. OP. come back. 

[holdmecloseandfast]

Most sexualized pop music talks about sex like it’s something the singer is taking. Is entitled to. Hozier sings like it’s holy and he’s been given a blessing he doesn’t deserve and cherishes all the more for it.

[falcon-caps]

peggy: hey steve, can you go post this letter for me?

steve: post a lett-

peggy: yeah and have you looked at hotels for our vacation?

steve, shaken: oh no lemme just googl-

steve:

[pineapplebread]

peggy: i’m so worried the kids might get polio this summer 

steve: polio–

[rael-rider]

I recommend people to read Captain America: Man Out of Time, it covers the first Avengers story with Cap after he wakes up from the ice. He misses his life in the 40′s, he wants to go back, etc… At one point they fight Kang the Conqueror and Steve gets sent back to V-Day after the Allies won in Europe. At first he’s happy but the reality of him romanticizing his own era due to nostalgia starts hitting him. He was already in a more advanced and, while not perfect, a more accepting time and him having to come back to a time where racism and sexism were worse, where medicine and technology weren’t as advanced, and everyone telling him “Yeah we won! The war is over! Time to rest!” it really leaves him fed up and unsatisfied. He also starts feeling like an outsider in his own time and i the end he decides to do something to go back to the future.

The last pages of that story have Steve writing in his journal about how living in the past is tempting but that it’s where fossils come from and that “there’ll always be something to fight for” so he decides to look ahead instead of back.

That whole story was basically the antithesis of Steve’s ending in Endgame.

[lauralot89]

Remember that scene in Winter Soldier when Sam’s all “you must miss the good old days” and Steve responds by actively dispelling the romanticizing of the past by pointing out that hey, now people aren’t dying horribly of polio

You’d think the directors and screenwriters of Endgame would have remembered that, CONSIDERING THEY MADE THE WINTER SOLDIER FILM

[aloeveragel]

I remember in my Arabic class we were going over the alphabet and the teacher was like there’s no ‘P’ etc and this white girl was like wait what but my names Paige and my teacher was like lol then we’d pronounce it as beige and she was so offended I’m crying thinking about it

[dotted-sixteenth-deactivated202]

One of my mom’s friends, Hugh, went to France and they had a lot of trouble pronouncing his name because the entire thing was silent.

[melonbottle]

salut je m'appelle [REDACTED]

[ghulheim]

lol when I lived in France my host family had a friend names Hugh. We saw him and his family a lot.

They pronounced it “oog” and I didn’t know until the day before I left France that his name was Hugh. I just thought he had some weird caveman nickname 😭

[toebeens]

that is hands down the funniest addition to this post

[faggotri]

honestly the best thing i’ve done in the past year was replacing “i wanna die” with “i wanna commit a crime.” same humor and sentiment without the suicidal ideation

[faggotri]

thank you SO much for this tag

[deadjosey-deactivated20200613]

Magic  level 99999

Subscribe to PaulVuTV

[oni-queen]

I like how half of these people reacting are drunk.

[sugar-and-spite]

tag yourself I’m the guy with the rubiks cube that just starts screaming

[honeymushroom]

this is so fucking funny jrbfgjkbjhfbg

[shittyknight]

I SCREAM

[etherealpanacea]

[megamindmutual-deactivated20191]

The epitome of men is feeling so absurdly enraged by a woman having opinions about a thing he likes that he makes a near day long video about how mad he is about it.

[barbara-lazuli]

… eleven hours??? Why did 100k people bother watching it?

[dirtreally]

guess who finished that entire fucking beatmap of the whole shrek movie on their first try

[dirtreally]

10 minutes in: i get a low battery alert on one of my controllers

20 minutes in: sweat starts falling onto my eyeballs and from here merely playing the map begins to hurt

25 minutes in: i start to realise that this map is easy enough that to not really pose a challenge skill-wise. the only test here is one of discipline and endurance.

whenever the fuck bad reputation starts: i started this thinking that there were only two musical numbers and am beginning to realise that i am wrong

somewhere after this: i start losing track of the plot because i keep thinking that puss in boots shows up int his movie when he in fact shows up only in shrek 2.

fiona is first revealed to be an ogre: i start squatting and lying down on the floor whenever i can, only getting up when absolutely necessary to hit the highest notes.

from here on out it is a blur. i keep getting low battery alerts every 2 minutes and i resolve to quit the moment one of my controllers runs out of battery. the moment never comes and the next thing i know i’m a believer is playing and i have won but at what cost.

[izbirakin]

Sevdiğim kediler

[your-url-is-problematic]

sound on!!!