Hobgoblin Shopkeep

That'll be $1,000,000, I've decided! Markathra, @hobjobgoblin on the orb formally known as Twitter and the new orb of Bluesky

[hobjobgoblin]

[hobjobgoblin]

Whaddya buyin' whaddya sellin'?

[orcboxer]

freeze frame. yep, that's me. you probably don't give a shit how I got into this situation

[partlysmith]

Spin the wheel. This is now your highest stat.

How fucked are you?

This owns

Pretty good actually

I can make this work

Not thrilled...

This sucks

My life is over

Voting ended onNov 14, 2025

[rockabillywife]

I bet it feels so good to return from a quest so worn out that you fall off your horse when you arrive at the gates

[maniakminis]

quit your job

join my band of mercenaries

[notactuallyherefor]

How's the dental?

[maniakminis]

you can have all the teeth you can carry

[hobjobgoblin]

Goblins are squirrels, hobgoblins are raccoons, bugbears are badgers, and orcs are wolverines.

I don't make the rules.

[medievaljournalist]

the buried treasure was uncovered and destroyed by shrews and burrowing insects

[meatswitch-deactivated20231107]

Wizards (1977)

[definitelynotindecisive]

[bogleech]

Oh are there people who don't know this mess of a movie has the all time most spectacular final wizard battle in the fantasy genre??

[medievaljournalist]

the gargoyle king has 1 hidden weakness

[hobjobgoblin]

Her name is Elisa Maza

[captainclickycat]

It's a little surprising that the "Monday's child is fair of face" nursery rhyme never caught on as an arbitrary personality-assigner in the same way astrology did. It makes the same amount of sense.

[captainclickycat]

Imagine people going around saying "yeah I could never date a Wednesday child, they're wired to be miserable and emotionally draining and as a Friday child I know I'd end up doing so much emotional labour for them"

[byrdsfly]

For those who don't know (I didn't either):

Monday's child is fair of face, Tuesday's child is full of grace. Wednesday's child is full of woe, Thursday's child has far to go. Friday's child is loving and giving, Saturday's child works hard for a living. But the child that is born on Sabbath day, Is bonny and blithe, good and gay.

So now, I ask...

Which are you?

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday

Voting ended onAug 24, 2025

[pawbeanies]

my bravest knighttt... come hither ..... mmmwah !! ok you are dismissed

[thaparasite]

dashing wishes

washing dishes

dancing witches

wizard bitches

[elegantpersoncreation]

Ball lightning while visiting a parking lot… Ball lightning is a rare phenomenon described as luminescent, spherical objects that vary from pea-sized to several meters in diameter....

[heathyr]

imagine being in the wilderness in 1542 and seeing this shit. i’d believe in will-o-the-wisps too

[cocoon2010]

We all got that one vassal who's read a few too many warrior tales... Trying to get a little freaky with it on the down low... Won't shut up about his loyalty unto death... Saying shit like "my liege, I am your blade...." Bitch I sent you to guard my isolated holdings in the eastern provinces for a reason!!!!!!! #REBLOG!!!!!

[hobjobgoblin]

Hobgob Mob

Forgot to post these here lol

Heads of the family when Markathra joins. Amyr is the legitimate boss while his wife, Ryma is the shadow boss/enforcer.

Officers Yarmy, Agostinho and Stevie Sanguisuga.

Foot soldiers Spandall Boggy, Hroda and Markathra, (pre-curse.)

And Markathra, cursed.

There might be more depending on my whims, lol.

[muffinlevelchicanery]

[bones-witch]

if you can't make a fireball yourself, store bought is fine

[hobjobgoblin]

Selling for 12.00 Copper! Crack open a hot one with the boys!!