Filk/Fansong Parodies

[houseoffilk]

Passover In Spaaaaccceee! (aka in honor of Artemis me making space filk of a couple Passover songs)

Dayenu

If there was one single mission

Single lunar orbit mission

Single lunar orbit mission,

Dayenu

Day-dayenu Day-dayenu

Day-dayenu dayenu dayenu

If we stopped at just one landing

Stopped at one small lunar landing

Stopped at one small lunar landing

Dayenu

Day-dayenu Day-dayenu

Day-dayenu dayenu dayenu

If we stopped at the space shuttle

Not returned after the shuttle

Not returned after the shuttle

Dayenu Day-Dayenu Day-Dayenu

Day-Dayenu dayenu dayenu

Day-dayenu Day-dayenu

Day-dayenu dayenu dayenu

We Will Boldly Go (filk of "Let My People Go")

In the sixties Kennedy said

We will boldly go

Decade-long space race lay ahead

We will boldly go

Fly on, spaceship

Past earth and far beyond

Like the sci-fi show

We will boldly go

We space raced to men on the moon

We will boldly go

But further progress wasn't soon

We will boldly go

Fly on, spaceship

Past earth and far beyond

Like the sci-fi show

We will boldly go

But a new era could arise

We will boldly go

As Artemis takes to the skies

We will boldly go

Fly on, spaceship

Past earth and far beyond

Like the sci-fi show

We will boldly go

[houseoffilk]

Leavin' Egypt (a Passover filk of Choosin' Texas by Ella Langley)

Thousands of years ago in a land that was called Mitzrayim

The Hebrews were toiling as slaves under Pharaoh's regime

Until a prince who really was not

Did what God asked to help improve their lot

Prince of Egypt learned his family were really enslaved and Hebrews

Ran away from home 'cause what do you do when hearing that kind of news

God's voice from a bush that was ablaze

Told Moses to make Pharaoh change his ways

Home to Eretz Yisrael

We're leavin' Egypt so we tell

Pharaoh's heart still was ice as all the plagues came rainin' down

'Till when the firstborn died he said Moses get outta town

People let go but hardship lay ahead

And there's no time to pack the leavened bread

Out of Egypt but they still had to find a way across the Red Sea

Moses raised his hand parted the waters so they could be free

They all danced and sang because they had won

But the journey 'cross the desert just begun

Home to Eretz Yisrael

We're leavin' Egypt so we tell

But even today there are people still not free

That's why the story is always told with a we

We don't need Moses to help us make a change

'Cause we all live in our own kind of narrow place

Not in Egypt but around the globe there are Pharaoh-types of every kind

And we don't need a bush to call us the fire's in our heart and mind

For none of us can say we're truly free

Until the time that everyone can be

Next year in Eretz Yisrael

We're leavin' Egypt so we tell

Two thousand years ago in a land that was called Mitzrayim...

[houseoffilk]

A Shul Song (Tipsy) (slightly-late Purim filk of A Bar Song (Tipsy) by Shaboozey as I wasn't impressed with Six13's Purim song so I made something I'd do if I had that kind of "Jcapella group")

Way back in ancient Persia

Esther had become the queen

But she was hiding something

That couldn't stay unseen

She's a Jew named Hadassah

The king's vizier wished them ill

So she'd be among all those

Haman intended to kill

One, here comes the two to the three to the four

Drawing lots to choose what day the Jews would be no more

But Esther and Mordecai helped us all win the war

Gave him

What for

(Chorus)

Dressing up so our identity's a mystery

Reading Megillah to celebrate our history

Drinking l'chaim to toast the ancient victory

Everybody at the shul getting tipsy

Every adult at the shul getting tipsy

Now each fourteenth of Adar

We see how we've come so far

Shpiels can make a kid a star

Purim

Making Haman's hat cookies

Graggers drown his name with ease

Pray for when this strife will cease

Purim

One, here comes the two to the three to the four

Somehow hamantaschen dough just keeps on making more

Make some in each flavor that the kids are asking for

How much

Good lord

(Chorus)

One, here comes the two to the three to the four

Giving out baskets full of shalach manot galore

They're doing a mitzvah when friends show up at your door

If not

Ignored

Tell 'em "Chag Purim"

(Chorus) x2

Everybody at the shul getting tipsy

(spoken): They tried to kill us we survived let's party!

[houseoffilk]

Superbiasedreallyunfairnetworkcancellations (a filk of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)

I am the type who loves themselves a procedural show

Though many of the best have shorter lifespans than you'd know

It sucks when you get attached to a show that's really great

Then look at entertainment news for bad news of its fate

(Chorus)

Superbiasedreallyunfairnetworkcancellations

Lead to online fandoms with pessimistic frustrations

We can make networks save the shows with the right motivations

Superbiasedreallyunfairnetworkcancellations

(Post-chorus)

ABC FOX CBS and NBC

Things can be hits if they're given time to be

If it's not part of a franchise or lacks an A-list name

Or made by the wrong people as they play the studio game

Or if it might be too diverse for some audience's taste

Then it's in danger of letting its story go to waste

(Chorus)

(Post-chorus x3)

Some past shows could continue, some another network found

But if not for fan pressure they would not have stuck around

Even if it's all for naught at least if we try we'll know

So let's add to the list of all the times fans saved a show

(Chorus)

(Post-chorus x3)

Of course we're also fighting for Diverseanticorporategrassrootsprogressivebroadcastnetworkreform but that's a little overkill all at once don't you think

So when a show gets canceled or one's too close to the brink

Their chances of renewal might be brighter than we think

From petitions to mail-in campaigns or writing networks

If we throw solutions at the wall something's gonna work

Superonlinefandomofacancelledshowfrustration

Can be cured by combating the cause of that vexation

Show the networks our collective righteous indignation

Supergrassrootsprorenewalfanmobilization!

[houseoffilk]

Will Gay Or Won't Gay (a version of Will They Or Won't They by The Doubleclicks with oops all same-sex ships canon or not)

(a little pre-song note: just like the original song this kinda uses an apparent diss at one half of each pairing to diss the speaker's partner so this is not anyone's thoughts on the actual characters, and if you like any of these shows and the will-they-won't-they from it check out any others you haven't seen as the point here is similar pairing vibes (also sign the linked petitions if you've seen any shows that have them linked in their verse))

You and I are kinda like

John Watson and Sherlock Holmes

In that I'm romantic and sweet and you're a high-functioning sociopath who always gets me into trouble

You and I are kinda like

Buck and Eddie Diaz

In that I'm a total badass with ADHD and you're always running from something

(Chorus)

In these stories we want to know

Will they or won't they

But with us I know the answer

We won't

In these stories we want to know

Will they or won't they

But with us I know the answer

We won't

You and I are kinda like

Dr. Nichols and Dr. Wolf

In that I have a job and a partner and you have both mommy and daddy issues

You and I are kinda like

Morgan and Selena

In that I have cute fashion sense and a really great mind and you've shown up at my house after midnight

You and I are kinda like

Myka and HG

In that this will all end in an ambiguous way and disappoint everyone

You and I are kinda like

Myka and HG

In after all this unresolved sexual tension and emotional investment and time and money this will end in a way that disappoints everyone

You and I are kinda like

Elsbeth and Kaya

In that it seems like everybody else loves me but you'd rather be anywhere else

You and I are kinda like

Jack Carter and Nathan Stark

In that the size of your ego is out of control and I get stuck cleaning up your messes

In these stories we want to know

Will they or won't they

But with us I know the answer

We won't

In these stories we want to know

Will they or won't they

But with us I know the answer

We won't

[houseoffilk]

The Story (WROEF version)

(Just thought this song suited this game and if it's vague and repetitive well so's the original Brandi Carlile song but I tried my best)

All of these rooms within my house

Tell stories of my family

Of how their stories came to end

And then all that remained was me

But these stories will get lost to time 

If you’ve got no one to tell them to

It’s true, I pass them on to you

When death is nipping at your heels

Only choice is to run away

But although the house became mine

Never thought I’d come back someday

But I thought that you deserve to know

Just where and who you come from

Yes you do, I pass this on to you

You see the love that’s in my eyes

It’s hiding the fear that’s deep inside

All of the secrets I must face

Hidden away within this place

But if my family were here they’d want

Me to share all their stories, yes

It’s true, I pass them on to you

All of these rooms within my house

Tell stories of my family

Of how their stories came to end

And then all that remained was me

But these stories will get lost to time 

If you’ve got no one to tell them to

It’s true, I pass them on to you

Oh yeah well it’s true, I pass them on to you

[houseoffilk]

Dumb Ways To Die (WROEF version)

Get eaten by an eldritch thing

Do a 1080 over a swing

Get greeted by a monster surprise

Don’t wait ‘till the wounded animal dies

Dumb ways to die

So many dumb ways to die

Dumb ways to die

So many dumb ways to die

The monster was a passing train

Take a dive down the bathtub drain

Ironic storm on a wedding day

Fall victim to an earthquake far away

Dumb ways to die

So many dumb ways to die

Dumb ways to die

So many dumb ways to die

Lose your own head to your imagination

Get killed by the dragon slide you were putting together

Think you can sail your house from Norway to Washington and it’s not going to sink

They might not rhyme but they’re quite possibly 

The dumbest ways to die

The dumbest ways to die

The dumbest ways to die

So many dumb, so many dumb ways to die

Be safe around family curses

A message from what remains of the Finch family

[houseoffilk]

God Said No (my version)

 (Note: sorry for the long hiatus; I’ve had filker’s block. So here’s something that isn’t necessarily a parody, just me changing the verses of a song that really touched me to make it even sadder by making it more meaningful to me, credit for the original goes to Dan Bern and Garry Novikoff)

I met God On the edge of town Where the wind meets the stillness Where the darkness meets the light Where the ocean meets the sky Where the desert meets the rain Where the earth meets the heavens On the edge of town I met God

I asked God

Do one thing for me

Send me back in time

Send me to D.C.

Let me go

Find the President

And convince him to 

Not cancel Apollo

Maybe show him Star Trek

Futures yet to come

Help us stay in space

For the Cold War if not longer

God said no

If I sent you back

No one would believe you

You couldn’t get an audience

You’re too young

To have that kind of knowledge

They’d just dismiss you as

A crazy sci-fi fan

God said no

I asked God

Do one thing for me

Send me back in time

Send me to LA

Let me find

Corey Monteith and Mark Salling

Help them see the right path

Away from all this bullshit

Maybe that would

Help Glee not get cancelled

I could be a writer

They could still be on it

God said no

If I sent you back

You would be too starstruck

Your plan would go sideways

If you spent

Enough time with them

They’d think you all were dating

The media’d go crazy

God said no

I asked God

Do one thing for me

Send me back in time

Send me to Iran

Help me stop

The CIA-led coup

Have you seen the pictures

Before then they were happy

It’d save us from

Decades of stress and grief

And save millions of lives

Of both theirs and ours

God said no

If I sent you back

You would be too scared

You couldn’t even think straight

Or they might

Not believe what you said

They’d think you’re the bad guy

And trying to trick them

God said Time Time belongs to me Time's my secret weapon My final advantage God turned away From the edge of town I knew I was beaten And that now was all I had God Said No

[houseoffilk]

Warehouse 13

Yet another save-the-show parody, this time parodying Anatevka from Fiddler On The Roof (because I think Warehouse 13 is a very Jewish show in spirit)

Syfy’s made up its mind

Season 5 is the last

Now endless wonder’s in the past

It’s over, there’s nothing we can do

Oh, yes, there is

You have a plan, or a vibe?

They can stop making new episodes, but they can’t take away what we had, the memories and friendships we formed as fandom members and the past stories that still remain. And as long as we hold on to the Warehouse 13 we have and not let the show’s death mean our letting go, then there can truly be endless wonder.

The memories, the family

What do we have?

We have hope, we have Warehouse 13

Warehouse 13, Warehouse 13

Beautifully insane Warehouse 13

Apples and mystery fill the air

Warehouse 13, Warehouse 13

Wondrous, humorous Warehouse 13

If you come by you should beware

We’ll all find new fandoms, schedules will change

But oh how fangirl life will seem strange

Without Warehouse 13

Our hearts belong to Warehouse 13

Something old, something new, Warehouse 13

We can continue this fandom somehow

(Sorry to circulate this petition again, but it’s been a year and I’m still not over it

https://www.change.org/p/the-syfy-channel-dynamite-entertainment-continue-the-story-of-warehouse-13-in-a-comic-book-series?just_created=true)

[houseoffilk]

Pictures In My Head (Warehouse 13 edition)

Based on this Muppets song

Endless wonder now has fled

Now it’s all just pictures in my head

Watched Warehouse 13 every day

I can’t believe this show would go away

Remember when Claudia found

Both big siblings again

I even miss the cool bad guys

That’s just how long it’s been

If this show could go on somehow

There’s so many stories to be told

Would people watch (or read) or even care?

I’ve always thought our fandom would be there

The Bering & Wells ship teases, they always gave me hope

They may have been annoying but I liked some of Pete’s jokes

Endless wonder shouldn’tve fled

Now it’s all just pictures in my head

Could the story still go on, in another medium?

This deserves to stay alive

After that lame attempt at season 5

Continue all this instead

Don’t leave the fans with pictures in their head

(https://www.change.org/p/the-syfy-channel-dynamite-entertainment-continue-the-story-of-warehouse-13-in-a-comic-book-series?just_created=true)