All smut is labeled by chapter with a stoplight emoji (🚦) and also tagged # hswriting smut
All Song Based Stories are tagged #song based story and #song series
All stories are tagged with their name (example: #the moment I knew). They are also tagged with the first letter of each word in the title (example: for the moment I knew, the tag is #tmik) unless it is a one word title, then it’s just the name (example: #Perfect)
Notes:
- The Moment I Knew is NOT part of the song series because it was written with multiple parts, while the song series is meant for more one shot type works.
- Song series are separate from one shots just for my own organizational purposes.
Harry is doing his normal walk on the beach when he meets someone strange. Koen wakes up to a human helping him in the water.
Harry wakes up, the sun barely shining on the water outside his house. The smell of salt from the ocean permeates the air. Harry rubs the sleep from his eyes before standing and picking out fresh clothes for the day. He stands in front of the mirror with black shorts and a white t-shirt on, his normal flip flops on his feet. He begins his descent down the front steps of his house and onto the beach, the mist of the water hitting his face.
He takes his time, walking the shoreline, letting the ocean waves caress his skin. Sometimes he picks up shells and places them in his pocket. Only the whole ones. No use in collecting the broken sea shells unless they have a unique pattern on them.
Harry always walks, every single day to clear his mind. Sleep hasn’t always come easy, and walking after a long night helps erase any bad dreams and energy from his mind. It helps him focus. It helps him appreciate the beautiful things. The crisp water, the salt air, the sand, the sky. He needs those little reminders of how beautiful life is.
As he creates footprints in the sand, he can see something on the distant shore. As he slowly walks closer, he sees a person lying on the sand face down beside the water. He begins to run, as fast as he humanly possible to help this person.
When he reaches them, he sees not legs on the sand, but a long purple tail, like a mermaid. He can’t believe his own eyes. A merman? The creatures of fiction and mythology, right here in front of his eyes.
He gets down to his knees and tries to shake this merman awake, still in shock of his existence.
“Are you okay?” He says as he shakes his shoulders. After several times of asking, the merman still doesn’t wake up. Harry does the only thing he can think of and puts him in the water. Surely that would help. He breathes water right?
After submerging him in the ocean, the merman comes to life, gasping for water in his lungs. After a few deep breaths, the merman sticks his head above the water, beautiful purple eyes sparkling like the ocean he lives in.
“Thank you so much!” He says, still surprised. “I would have died had I not been in the water soon. You saved my life.”
Harry was at a loss for words as the piercing purple eyes of the merman in front of him glance over his body.
“You’ve never met my kind before. I’m sorry. This has got to be a shock to you. My name is Koen.” He says as he swipes blonde hair out of his eyes.
“My name is Harry. I can’t believe you’re real. How are you real?”
“We’ve always existed. Humans can be cruel. We try to hide but I’m glad you found me. Can’t really hide when you’re unconscious.” Koen states, still shocked at being alive.
“How did you end up here and unconscious?” Harry asks as he sits down in the sand. His fingers draw pictures in the sand but his eyes never leave the stunningly beautiful half man and half fish in front of him.
“I don’t remember how I got here. Lucky I’m not worse off. I could have damaged my tail. That would have been bad.”
“Worse than dying?” Harry asks curiously.
“Yes. Tails heal so slowly. It’s so painful to damage your tail, and so hard to repair if you need healing.” Koen explains, and Harry can’t quit looking at the beautiful purple under the water. “They are very delicate things. So sometimes, depending on the damage, you’d rather die than have that.”
“Oh. I didn’t know.” Harry’s faces flushed red with blush.
“It’s okay.” He says with a smile. “I owe you big time. What can I do to repay the kindness you’ve shown me?”
Harry just looks at Koen with a confused look.
“I wouldn’t even know what to ask for. This is all so new.” Harry stated. Koen nods.
“How about this? Can I come back and talk to you again? I figure since you already know about me, it would be okay.”
“I walk this beach every morning. So, if you want to.” Harry sounds unsure. Is he losing his mind? Koen gives him a big smile. “What would we talk about?”
“I’d love to know about your world. And I’m sure you have lots of questions. I’d love to answer them but I don’t know how long I’ve been gone, and I have to get back.” Koen replies. He reaches his hand out of the water and takes Harry’s hand. He holds it for a moment. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Thank you again.” He says and then swims away. The only evidence Harry isn’t losing his mind is the fact that his hand is dripping wet with the salty water of the ocean.
That night, Harry slept as soundly as he ever has before, dreaming of the boy with the purple eyes and purple tail. Dreaming of the way he so effortlessly swam away. Dreaming of the way he talked, and things they could talk about. Harry thought he was the most beautiful man he’d ever seen. And he can’t wait to see him when he wakes up.
When Harry does wake up, he is startled by how refreshed he felt. A full nights sleep. Good dreams. His past for once didn’t haunt him. He stretches before climbing out of bed, and then stretches again. Harry goes to the mirror and sees sleep lines on his skin, something he doesn’t usually have since he can never seem to stop tossing and turning.
Harry changes into a pair of swim shorts and a t-shirt, anxious to go for his walk this morning. He paces for a minute in front of the mirror, thinking of how crazy he is for wanting to go back and talk to something, someone who isn’t supposed to exist. He feels even crazier that he put on swim shorts to be able to go in the ocean with him, so the distance isn’t so far to talk. Or maybe that’s just an excuse to be in the water with someone so beautiful.
Harry finally decides to stop pacing and go onto the beach, his feet bare in the water as the waves lap around his ankles. He walks close to where he found Koen yesterday, but doesn’t see him. He sits down as the waves crash over his legs and waits. Staring at the sun rise over the water, he appreciates the view again. Pinks, oranges, and blues paint the sky like a work of art, blurring and mixing in with the fluffy clouds that float by.
Harry scans the water again after what feels like a lifetime of waiting. Nothing. No glowing purple eyes. No beautiful, shimmering tail.
Maybe Harry did imagine it all. Maybe he made up Koen in his mind so he wasn’t so lonely. It’s been ages since Harry had a friend, let alone someone more to talk to. He’s had boyfriends in the past, but they never seemed to work out. He had friends before he moved to the ocean, out of his hometown. He felt guilty for leaving them behind, but he needed out of that place.
Did Harry just not remember dipping his hand in the water yesterday? He remembers the warm feel of Koen’s hand in his, a strange gesture to say thank you. But Harry didn’t mind when pretty boys held his hand. Harry didn’t mind any contact at all, being as touch starved as he was.
As Harry got lost in his mind while staring out into the distance, a faint purple glow was in front of him. Koen pops out of the water with a subtle splash. His hair drips water down his face, but it doesn’t take away from the smile painted on his face.
“Good morning Harry.” Koen kindly greets. “I see you’re dressed for water?”
“I’ll swim a little while we talk, if you don’t mind.” Harry says shyly. Koen’s smile only grows as he nods and takes Harry’s hand again, dragging him into the water with him. Harry’s curls flatten as they soak with the water. The swim out a bit, Koen beating Harry out to a reasonable distance from shore. If anyone else was awake and on the beach, they would look just like two guys takes an early swim. Noone would be able to tell Harry is talking to a merman of all things.
“Did you think up any questions?” Harry asks Koen when they find a spot to just float.
“Of course.” He says. Harry likes the energy Koen gives off. He seems perky, but not in an annoying way. In a positive way. In a way that reminds you of an excitable puppy. “The thing I have always wanted to know about you guys is how in the world do you guys walk with legs? They don’t make any sense?”
“Well your tail doesn’t make sense to me. How do you do a lot of things?” Harry chuckles.
“That’s understandable.” He says as he nods. “Did you think of anything?”
Harry thought of a lot of things, especially with his dream last night. Which question should he ask first?
“Where do you live? I know obviously the ocean, but is there like cities down there that we don’t know about?”
“Of course. We use our magic to cloak them. That’s why humans haven’t discovered them yet. The cities are beautiful. I wish I could take you to show you.” Koen admits. “That would take time.”
“You barely know me. Why would you want to take me to your city?” Harry asks confused.
“You saved my life. And I’m so fascinated by you. Not just because you’re a human but because you had such kindness in your heart to put me back into the water. You didn’t kidnap me like what happens to so many others who swim too close to shore. You saved me.” He says with a smile. He looks at Harry and at his pretty green eyes. His body is toned and is perfect. He has some kind of ink scribbled across his skin and it’s hard for Koen to break his stare at such intricate art.
“I didn’t even know that would save you. I didn’t know you guys were real. I just did the first thing that crossed my mind.” Harry tells Koen.
“Well, still. I’m going to try and get some magic to let you come if that’s something you want to do? It’s going to take time to get my hands on anything so it may be a while.”
“If you trust me enough to take me, I’d love to go. But I don’t know that it would be good.”
“Why wouldn’t it be?” Koen asks surprised.
“Because there’s a reason you guys have them hidden. I don’t want to intrude on your space if I’m not supposed to be there.” Harry sighs.
“Harry. You would be allowed there because I am bringing you. I don’t believe you would do us any harm.”
“People would know I don’t belong there. I have legs.”
“I’m going to work on that.” Koen responds and Harry just tilts his head. “We have magic. Like I said. Give me a little time. Until then, we can just do this.”
“Do what?” Harry asks curiously. Right now they are just swimming around and talking.
“This. Do you not want to meet anymore? Your question just seems that way.”
“No of course I do. If I didn’t want to meet, I wouldn’t have walked down here this morning. I didn’t mean to make it seem that way. I’m really curious about you. Just after swimming for a while I will need a break.”
“Oh right of course. If you need help I can help you.” Koen says. He feels like he may be overdoing it, but since Harry saved him he can’t help but want to be around him as much as he can. He wants to know Harry like he knows the ocean.
Koen feels like fate brought him to the shore yesterday. The memory of what happened not being important. The universe just needed a reason to cross their paths. He can already feel that string of fate slowly tangling around Harry’s life. It makes him feel crazy, how quickly he became obsessed with Harry. He doesn’t want to scare him away, but Koen knows of one person who has talked of a magic to allow a human to have a mermaids tail, and still be able to switch back to their legs when they are ready to go home.
He knows magic has a hefty price, but for Harry to be a part of his world, it would be worth it.
Harry nods and Koen offers his arm. Harry latches on to him and they speedily swim back to shore. Koen stays in the water up to his chest while Harry sits down on the sand to rest.
“What else can you do? Other than swim I mean.”
“Well, I know a small bit of magic, but not enough. I’m slowly teaching myself.”
“You can do magic?” Harry’s eyebrows lift to his hairline. “What can you do?”
“Well so far it’s mostly just being able to move things. Like right now if I wanted that seashell by your leg I could just float it over here.”
“Do it.” Harry says.
Koen looks around to make sure the beach is still void of people, and then lifts his hand out of the water. He holds it in Harry’s direction and focuses. A small sparkling purple magic comes from his hand and grabs the seashell, placing it in his palm.
“Oh my god. That’s amazing!” Harry exclaims. He gets up and comes closer, putting his feet in the water before sitting down again. He grabs the seashell from Koen’s hand and holds it. He eventually decides to pocket the seashell. One little take away from their encounters. Koen grabs Harry’s hand after he pockets the shell. Harry’s face flushes red, and Koen’s follows suit.
Koen laces their fingers together and slowly brings Harry back into the water. Harry’s feet still reach the sand, and he stands comfortably in the water at Koen’s side. Harry is calm, but Koen’s heartbeat is rapid. He wonders if Harry can feel it in his fingertips. He doesn’t know why he reached for Harry’s hand, but he wanted to. So he did. And Harry didn’t mind. His brain is still trying to process that there is a merman holding his hand. A merman who is so interested in him it’s almost obsessive. A merman who seems to like Harry. It’s almost like a movie he saw once. Harry doesn’t believe in love at first sight, but Koen does. And he’s sure that this is love.
Harry believes he’s just being friendly. Maybe this is normal for Koen. But normal or not, it makes the gears spin in Harry’s head. He wants him to visit his home. He wants to hold his hand. How can Koen feel this way about someone he doesn’t know? Let alone a human?
They both look out as the sun rises on the water, turning the sky beautiful colors once again.
“People are going to start showing up soon.” Harry states softly. “I should probably go in a bit.”
“So soon? I feel like you just got here.” Koen says, disappointment lacing his voice.
“I can come back.” Harry says and that brings a smile to both of their faces.
“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Koen says. He lets go of Harry’s hand and swims down deep into the waters. Harry returns home with his shell.
Koen, upon reaching his home in the depths of the blue ocean, he begins his search for the man who wields much more powerful magic than him. How much will it cost to bring Harry here? For him to have a tail? Whatever it was would be worth it to bring Harry to his home and give the handsome boy a proper thank you for saving his life.
When Koen enters his living space, he sees his friend Malia sitting there, waiting for him.
“Malia? What are you doing here so early?”
“Just wondering where my best friend is sneaking off to at such hours. Two days in a row.” She said, not as happily as she looks. “You know it’s dangerous outside of the cloak.” Malia reminded him.
Koen knew he was going to have to tell her everything. Even though he wanted to keep the human to himself a little while longer.
“So, I may have accidentally blacked out and washed up on a beach.” Koen says, knowing Malia will scold him.
“A beach? You’re lucky no one saw you!” She yelled. “Humans are awful creatures. They could have hurt and killed you!”
“Could have, but didn’t.” I said softly and she just looked at me, her jaw practically on the floor.
“You met a human? Are you out of your mind?” Malia says softly, not wanting to risk another soul hearing.
“He’s amazing. He’s beautiful. He saved my life. I was fully on the shore and he put me back in the water. He didn’t have to do that. He saved my life. I owe him everything.”
“You owe him nothing.” Malia says, her face beginning to turn red from her anger.
“I’m going to bring him here. I want him to know about us. He already knows we exist now because he found me. I want to bring him here and show him my home. I want you to meet him.”
“And just how exactly do you plan on doing that? I have no interest in meeting a human.”
“Malia please. I know this sounds crazy, but I like him. I do.”
“Oh Koen. Your poor romantic soul. He saved your life. You’re going to feel that way.” She places a hand on his shoulder.
“No. It’s not just because of that. He’s kind. He’s sweet. He’s pretty. I wish you could see him. You will see him. It means a lot to me to bring him here. I’m going to visit someone with better magic than me. I’m hoping to be able to give Harry a tail for a little while.”
“That’s heavy magic Koen. You know that’s going to cost you.”
“I know. I think it’s worth it.”
“You really like him don’t you?” She says after a long pause. “You always did believe in love so soon.” She sighs. Koen nod at her and she takes her hand off of his shoulder. “Please be careful. I don’t want him to hurt you. You guys are different. Magic may give him a tail but he will still be human. He may not think it’s okay to be with our kind.”
Koen tried to push down the thought, but knew she was right. Harry was a human. Being with a human would never work.
Koen thinks that he is getting ahead of himself. He shakes the thoughts away. Enjoy Harry’s friendship. Enjoy the time they have. Malia gives Koen a hug before swimming away.
Koen sits in his house and thinks about Harry. How Harry let him hold his hand. How good it felt. Did Harry’s heart race like his did? Did Harry even notice?
They spend the next few days talking in the mornings before going about their days, just enjoying each other’s company. Talking about families, memories, people in their lives. Each day they held hands, and each day Koen fell harder while Harry was hesitant to fall at all. He could feel it happening, but didn’t know how to navigate liking a mythical being. A beautiful merman.
The next morning, Harry beat Koen there, already letting the waves crash over his ankles as he searched for the purple tail in the water. Koen swims up to the shore with a big smile on his face.
“You’re awful perky for this early aren’t you?” Harry says.
“Good morning to you too.” Koen replies.
“What’s got you in such a good mood?”
“Just getting to see you.” Koen says and Harry’s face flushes. Harry steps farther into the water and starts to swim out. Koen easily keeps pace with him. Harry goes out as far as he is comfortable and floats. Koen stays beside of Harry, watching him as the waves crash into them.
Koen, feeling playful, splashes Harry with some water, making him smile.
“I’ll get you back for that!” Harry says as Koen swims a little farther out. Harry splashes the water as much as he can, not even reaching Koen. Koen comes closer and lets Harry get his revenge. Koen swims up behind Harry and splashes him into the water. Harry swims back up to the surface and wraps his arms around Koen. He tries and tries to bring Koen down, but Koen has the upper hand when it comes to playing in the water. Harry gets splashed again before Koen grabs his hands.
They both pause playing in the water to recognize their interlaced fingers and soft grip. Koen swam so close to Harry that he could feel Koen’s breath on his skin. Both of them were breathing hard.
Koen reached up for Harry’s face and tenderly cupped his cheek. Harry leaned into it. Anxiety fluttered through them both. But Harry pushes it to the side and asks the questions he has been wondering.
“How is this supposed to work. I’m a human and you’re a merman. I’m not going to lie and say I don’t feel anything for you, but I don’t know how to do this. How are we supposed to do this?” Harry asks out of breath.
“We can do this however we want to. We make the rules.” Koen replies.
“Your kind don’t have any rules about being with humans?”
“Well, there never has been. That’s kind of our history. Magic and humans and everything. But there is no formal rule to not be with humans. It’s just not very wise because they typically hurt us. But you’re not like that. So I think it’s okay. But we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. But I like you too Harry.”
Harry isn’t surprised that the feelings are reciprocated. As touchy and affectionate that Koen is, it was kind of obvious.
But Koen’s thumb runs up and down Harry’s cheek as he pulls him in and plants a soft and slow kiss on Harry’s lips.
He tastes like the salt of the ocean, but Harry doesn’t mind. He kisses Koen back, putting a hand on the back of his head and one on his back, pulling him even closer until their bodies were touching. Harry doesn’t have to kick to keep himself afloat anymore. Koen holds him tightly and Harry can feel the scaled texture of Koen’s tail.
Harry couldn’t deny anymore how he felt about Koen, merman or not. Other world or not. Koen had his heart in his hands, and he could only hope he was careful with it.
As the kiss ends, Harry begins to kick his feet again as they swim back to shore. A person was walking on the beach, and Koen had to say his goodbyes quickly before he was spotted. Harry hated that he had to go, still being able to feel the lingering kiss on his lips. He missed him the whole rest of the day.
Harry still took his walk on the beach, but Koen wasn’t able to show up for a few days as he chased down the magic that could let them share worlds. Harry sat in the sand and wondered if the kiss was too much. What else could Harry have done to drive him away?
Harry kept that seashell in his pockets, playing with it and tracing the pattern on it any time he thought of Koen. He felt ridiculous for missing him, but just the thought of swimming with the boy with purple eyes again made him smile. Harry never felt this way about any human. It was all too much to handle in such a short time. But he liked spending time with Koen as the sun came up over the horizon.
Eventually a week passed with no more contact from Koen, and Harry was sure he imagined him. But he knows he didn’t. The shell was proof of that. The feeling of their fingers intertwined in his memory was proof of that. The memory of their kiss is proof of that. He missed him horribly. How silly he was for believing he would get to know him. Get to know the merman who stumbled into his life. Maybe Koen had the sense to stay away from humans. Maybe it’s better this way. After all. Merpeople are supposed to be a secret. And as much as Harry wants to know Koen, maybe it’s for the best he tries to forget him. He shouldn’t have given his heart away so easily.
Koen missed Harry just as badly, wanting to see him every day, but each day he looked he got closer to finding the magic he needed. There was a local man in the city that could help him with this exact thing. And he wanted to surprise Harry with this. He wants Harry to be able to swim deep in the ocean with him. And that was almost a reality.
Malia advised against tracking this man down, but Koen was determined. He was the only one who went in the tall building where this person was supposed to be located.
He was greeted warmly by a man whose dark blue tail shined in the light of the room.
No, not exclusively. I’m open to writing female characters but writing male is more comfortable to me. Is there’s something specific you’d like to see you can always send an ask and I can work on it the best I can
Harry has to take a walk along the beach every morning for several reasons. First, to erase the nightmares that trail him when he closes his eyes. And second, to see the sunrise on the water and the beauty of the world before people are awake. Harry runs into something unexpected on his morning walk, that changes his whole life.
Koen is an excitable merman, who likes to take risks and go on an adventure. When one of his adventures causes him to black out and wash up onto the beach, he comes to with a pair of emerald green eyes staring back at him. Koen instantly falls for those eyes, and the person behind them.
I’ve got a good portion of it done. I’ve just been writing slow and not pushing myself to rush it so that I can make it as good as it can be. Thank you for checking in!
[Image Alt ID: a four picture collage with a dark blue background. The first picture is a photo of a hand holding a small transgender flag, which has stripes in the following colors: Baby blue, light pink, white, light pink, and baby blue. The second picture is of two hands making a heart shape with their fingers, surrounding the moon. The third picture is of shadows. The shadows are of three people standing next to each other. The final picture is of three people walking down a sidewalk. End Alt ID]
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Masterlist Series Part 2
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Harry and Calum are keeping their newfound relationship a secret from Mason, but not for long.
(Warnings: mentions of sex, intimate scene but not sex scene, still marking as smut for those who want to avoid. Hickeys.)
(Note: I didn’t do a word count for this one. I’ve found it adds a lot of pressure to do big parts so if I don’t know it’s easier for me. Sorry!)
Harry decided that we should go to the mall, and I’m really anxious. This is where Travis and I had a lot of issues. He didn’t want to hold my hand. He didn’t want people to think he was dating a boy I guess. I don’t understand. He was supportive and then he wasn’t. But Harry has been nothing but supportive, so what am I worried about?
We are in the car, driving to go clothes shopping and get haircuts. Harry is getting some new jeans and shirts while I’m getting my hair cut before it gets too long. Harry is his normal self, but he’s slowly been getting more affectionate. He can hardly keep his hands off of me. But I’m not complaining. The hugs, kisses, and hand holding is all I’ve ever wanted. It’s amazing.
My one hand is under my leg, trying to hide my shaking at going out for the first time with Harry in public. My other hand rests on top of his as it sits on my knee.
“You doing okay, love?” Harry asks. I’m not very good at hiding my anxiety.
“Yeah. I’m okay.” I say, not wanting him to worry about me. I’ll be okay. No matter what happens. I’ll be okay.
Harry glances over at me and his smiles falls a little bit.
“I don’t like it when you lie about how you’re feeling. I can see you’re anxious. Talk to me about it.” He says and guilt punches me in the stomach.
“You shouldn’t have to worry about me being anxious. I can handle a trip to the mall.” I tell him and there goes the last of Harry’s smile. His grip slightly tightens on my knee and I’m not sure he even realizes that he did it. It doesn’t hurt. It’s not scary. Just a small sign he doesn’t like what I said.
“You’ve said about Travis before. Is this because of him? Is he why you get so anxious at the mall?” He calls me out and I feel my face flushed red from guilt and embarrassment. I nod my head and Harry loosens his grip on my knee, my honesty relaxing him. “I’m not-“
“I know you’re not Travis. I know you’re supportive. That’s why I didn’t want you to worry. Because I know I’ll be okay. I know you’ll like me afterwords. I’m anxious for you. You’ll get called names if anyone knows I’m trans. You don’t deserve that.”
“Cal.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I know this is a repetitive conversation. I’m sorry.”
“Cal I love you. I love you so much.” He tells me and I freeze in my seat. “I’ll defend us if it comes to it, but it doesn’t have to be the way Travis made it. I love you.”
“I love you.” I say without hesitation. I truly mean it. Harry is the best thing to happen to me and my life. I’ve been gifted with the best brother and his best friend. I get to live my life as myself and they still love me. Harry’s smile returns and I can’t help but to smile back, easing the anxiety away. He loves me.
We reach the mall and decide to let me get my haircut first. I’m sat in a chair immediately and asked what I want. I show them a picture on my phone and they get to chopping away while Harry stands to the side and watches. He smiles at me the whole time, admiring how my face lights up when I see the longer hair fall to the ground. I love having short and masculine hair. It feels good.
When the haircut is done, Harry swipes his card before I can get mine out and pay for it.
“Hey!” I say and Harry chuckles at me. We walk out of the hair salon and Harry’s chuckling dies down a bit. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“You looked so happy sitting in that chair. I couldn’t not want that for you. Paying for it is the least I could do to see you light up like that.” I know my face is turning red.
“Well, thank you.” I tell him, appreciating the kindness Harry has shown for me.
“You’re welcome.” He says, and places a small kiss on my lips. I melt anyways and grab his hair, wanting something deeper. He gives it to me, not even hesitating to kiss me and it’s an amazing feeling. When we separate, we begin to walk to one of the clothing stores Harry wanted to visit. He grabs my hand on the way and I feel myself falling harder every second of it.
We walk into the clothing store and Harry begins browsing the jeans. As I walk with him I see some things I would like and put them in my basket. We both end up buying at least two pairs of pants and a couple of shirts. We each pay for our clothes and walk out of the store.
“I’m starving.” Harry says. “Do you want to get dinner with me since we are out?” He asks kindly and I nod. His hand is still in mine.
“Can we get tacos?” I say, really in the mood for them.
“Of course.” He says as we walk to the food court. Harry orders for us both as I pick the table and sit down. Once Harry gets the order we sit down at the table together and eat, talking the whole time about how good of a day we are having and how great it was to get to spend the day at the mall together.
A person walks up to us at our table and my body tenses. I have no idea who this person is and why they are here.
“Hey. Sorry to intrude on your lunch, but is that a trans tattoo on your wrist?” They asks and I feel the familiar fear crawl up my spine.
“Yeah, It is.” I say shortly. Harry looks serious as he puts down his food.
“It’s beautiful work isn’t it?” Harry asks her and she beams brightly. “Person who did it is super talented.”
“They are. I’ve recently come out to my family and they aren’t really supportive of me using he/him pronouns. But it’s awesome to see other trans people out and living happy. It gives me hope. So thank you.” He says and I smile at him. I remember what it was like to meet the first trans person I ever knew. It was an amazing feeling to finally have the words for myself that I needed.
“Don’t thank me. Just don’t let them get you down. It will get better. Okay?”
“Okay. Have a good day.” He said and I returned it. Harry just smiles at me and gives me a big kiss for being brave as he put it. His hands rest on my cheek as he leans over the table and plants his soft lips onto mine.
When the kiss is over, we resume our lunch and then go to Harry’s house. Once we pull onto Harry’s street, Mason’s car is in the driveway. We weren’t expecting him to come over.
“What is he doing here?” Harry asks me but I’m just as clueless as he is.
“I have no idea. Maybe he just wants to hang out?” I guess as we get out of the car and so does Mason. He doesn’t look happy as he gets out of his car. He looks almost angry. Irritated. Upset.
“Hey.” Harry says lightly, not sure how to gauge Mason’s situation.
“Hey. We need to talk. Can I come inside?” Mason says, putting his hands in his pockets.
“Yeah of course.” Harry says, wanting to be supportive of whatever is bothering my brother. I want to be supportive too. It must be serious if he just showed up to Harry’s house without talking to him first.
But maybe he tried to, but Harry was out with me. Our trip to the mall could have hurt Mason. He could be feeling ignored. Alone. Maybe that’s why he just popped over.
Once we all get inside we put our bags down and sit down in the living room. Except Mason doesn’t sit down. He stands in front of the tv, looking at Harry and I. His hands still fidget in his pockets.
“What’s wrong Mason?” I ask, afraid that he is so upset. I haven’t seen him this upset in a long time.
Mason takes a deep breath, trying to calm how antsy he is.
“Let me just start that you guys are the two most trusted people in my life. You guys mean the world to me.” Mason begins.
“You mean the world to us too Mason.” I say. It doesn’t seem to be received. Harry sits anxiously on the couch beside of me, his leg bouncing so fast I think he might take off running like The Flash.
“And I’m trying to be really cool about this but I’m not going to lie. I’m a little mad.” Mason continues. “You didn’t trust me.”
I’m so confused. Didn’t trust him with what? What have we done wrong?
“Mason, you’re being cryptic. Say what you mean.” Harry says in a serious tone, ready to jump to the point.
“I saw you guys at the mall. You guys made out like there was no one else there. You didn’t even trust me to know. Why didn’t you trust me to know?” He says and now the anger and betrayal make sense. He wasn’t hurt by Harry not answering his phone. He found us out and is hurt that his best friend and his brother didn’t trust him enough to tell him they are dating. He points at me. “You tell me everything. He’s my best friend. Why would you do that? Why wouldn’t you talk to me?” He scolds. He points over at Harry next, “and you. You’re my best friend. We’ve talked about you liking Cal before. Why didn’t you talk to me either?”
“Mason,” Harry breathes out, hurt evident in his voice. “We weren’t ready to tell you yet. We didn’t want you to freak out. I know we’ve talked about this before but you have to understand you don’t get to choose who you fall in love with. And I love Calum.”
“You said you’d try to date others-“
“And I did.” Harry replies quickly.
“Hey!” I say loudly between them. “You guys are talking about this like it doesn’t involve me and my feelings. Mason what do you mean you told him to try and date others?”
Mason breathes deeply again, not realizing what he has spilled in front of me. Him and Harry made a deal. One that I had no idea what happened. I look over at Harry and I can tell he is even more anxious now.”
“I asked Harry to try to date other people. I didn’t want him dating my sister. And when you transitioned I thought Harry would know that I still didn’t want him to date my brother. I didn’t think we needed to talk about this.”
“Who are you to decide who dates who Mason?” I say, feeling myself getting irritated as well. “Harry can date who he wants. If he loves me why can’t he date me? Why can’t I date him?”
“Because he is my best friend. You guys are so important to me. What happens if you break up. How do you think that is going to feel for me? I have to choose my brother or my friend. That’s not a position I want to be in.”
“Well let me make it clear that I don’t intend on breaking up with Cal.”
“You never do when you first start dating. You never see the end.”
“Mason. This is ridiculous-“ I start but am cut off by Harry.
“I understand where you’re coming from, but I love Cal. And you need to understand I really did try to back away for you. I didn’t confess my feelings when I saw Travis getting closer. I let him go. I dated other people. But it wasn’t fair to them because I still loved Cal. And you’re my friend but you’re not my boss. We wanted to tell you in time. This is still pretty fresh. We wanted to figure it out more ourselves and how to tell you.” Harry states, his leg still bouncing up and down. Mason takes his hands out of his pockets and plays with a small keychain he had in there.
Hearing Harry say he tried with other people but still had feelings for me makes me ache. I could have avoided Travis and his heartbreak all along if it wasn’t for Mason’s actions. I could have loved Harry sooner. I could have been happier. Why wouldn’t Mason want that for me. My chest squeezes with the hurt of all of this coming to the surface.
“Mason, why wouldn’t you want me to date Harry? I don’t understand?”
“It’s like I said. I never wanted to have to choose.”
“You don’t have to. Nothing has to change.” I tell him and he shakes his head.
“Everything will change. Tv nights will be different. You guys will cuddle and kiss and I’ll feel weird. Any time we hang out now I’ll be the third wheel. I don’t want to be excluded because you guys got together. And I know that sounds selfish but whatever. I’ll be selfish.”
“Nothing has to change. Yeah we might peck and hold hands but it’s not like we would do anything to make you uncomfortable. We aren’t going to forget about you.” Harry reassures him. He stands up and gets in front of Mason and wraps his arms around him. They hug for a moment, solidifying the friendship Mason was so afraid to lose. His anger wasn’t jealousy. He’s not a selfish child when their parents have a second baby. He is just afraid of losing the two most important people of his life to each other. That’s understandable.
I stand up and hug Mason as well. He wraps his arms tightly around me. “I just love you guys.” He says in my shoulder.
“We love you too Mason.” Harry and I both say at the same time. Mason finally relaxes and we all sit down on the couch, except Mason takes my old spot and lets me sit next to Harry.
“Well, this is one thing that probably has to change isn’t it.” Mason mentions the positioning on the couch.
“It doesn’t have to.” Harry says. And I nod along. I knew this would be hard but I never would have imagined this is how Mason found out. A kiss in the food court and our first I love yous. My first positive experience at the mall.
“Are we still hanging out this week?” Mason asks, his nerves beginning to ease as he becomes more relaxed at the sight of us sitting next to each other.
“Of course.” Harry answers Mason. “Are you bringing food or am I making something?”
Their conversation falls into normalcy and it brings ease to my anxiety. Mason walked in angry and hurt and is calm and okay now. I hope he understands. I love Harry. I love him a lot.
At least Mason knowing allows us to take a breath of fresh air. We can talk about it. He knows about us and we can hold hands and be happy. I can be happy.
God only knows how long I’ve waited for a happiness like this.
“Calum?” Harry’s voice cuts through my thoughts. “What do you want to do. Do you want to ride home with Mason or stay here for a while longer?”
“Would you mind if I stayed?” I ask them both, knowing this is a sensitive moment for them both.
“I don’t mind.” Harry says immediately. Mason takes a moment to himself before answering.
“That’s fine. Just text me when you’re coming home and I’ll unlock the door for you.” He says calmly and gives me a hug before grabbing his keys and heading out the door.
Harry and I sit alone in the living room and I relax into him, his arms open wide ready to hold me. He kisses the top of my head and takes a deep breath.
“That’s not how I expected that to go.” Harry mumbles, the vibrations rumbling in his chest.
“I know. It was really unexpected.” I say, wanting to leave it behind. “Can I try on my new clothes?”
“Of course. You don’t have to ask. You can change in my bedroom if you want to.” Harry offers and I take my bags back the hallway and lay the clothes out on his bed. I try not to snoop, but I can’t help but to look around his room at the pictures on the wall. A few of him, of Mason, his sister, and a few of me from some of the times we hung out as friends.
I step closer to the one where Harry has his arm wrapped around me in a side hug. I can’t help but to think about how he liked me even then, even all that time ago. I’ve kept him waiting for a long time.
I stop my snooping and slip on the faded blue jeans and graphic t shirt onto my body. I look in the mirror and love the way they fit. The shirt falls perfectly over my chest and the jeans fit just right without hugging any curves too tightly.
I open the bedroom door and walk out to see Harry resting on the couch.
“Do I get to see?” He asks as I walk out to see him. When he turns around his eyes light up at the sight of me. He stands up and comes over to me, his eyes roaming my body. He places a hand on my cheek and pulls me in for a long and slow kiss.
“You look stunning. So handsome.” He says as his kisses trail from my lips to the one spot behind my ear that drives me crazy.
“I’ve still got more outfits.” I tell him and he smiles.
“Okay.” He says as he slowly backs away. “Does one of them not require a shirt?” He teases.
“I think one of them might. Only if I stay the night.” I mention, testing the waters with Harry. I’d sleep shirtless if he wanted me too. It’s all about him being comfortable seeing my scars from my surgery.
“You want to stay the night?” Harry asks hopeful.
“Only if you’re ready for that. I know we are kinda going fast and-
“I’d love for you to. If you’re ready for it.”
“Okay. Although telling Mason after him just calming down might not be a good idea. Maybe I’ll text him later.”
Harry face might split in half with his smile being so wide. He wraps me tightly in his arms and it makes me laugh. He lifts me up and kisses me with excitement. When he puts me down I go back to his room and put on another outfit. When I come back out his eyes look over my body again and it makes me feel amazing.
A wave is sadness hits me when I realize I’ve never been looked at like this before. But the happiness of Harry looking at me at all sweeps it away.
“Do you need some pjs for your next outfit, love?” Harry offers and I nod. Harry runs back and grabs me some pants. He also grabs a shirt just in case. But I only change into the pants, a little nervous at him seeing my scars. I can’t recall if he has ever seen them before.
When I come back out in only the pajama pants hanging low on my waist, enough to show the top of my boxers, I can practically hear Harry’s jaw hit the floor.
“How does this one look?” I ask and he just roams my body again, except this time, the kisses don’t stop at my neck. He slowly kisses down my chest and back up to my lips, definitely easing the anxiety in my chest about the scars, but creating a whole new anxiety instead.
I love Harry, but I am definitely not ready for sex yet. Not so soon. So him practically getting on his knees to kiss me and adore me kind of scares me a little, but he isn’t pushing or pressuring. He’s just loving on my body in a way no one has ever done before and it makes me love him all the more for it.
Harry comes back up and picks me up again, carrying me back to the couch and laying me down to continue kissing my chest and my neck.
“I love you.” I say as his soft lips trace invisible lines across me.
“I love you. More than you know.” He says in between kisses.
He finally calms down as he lays his ear on my chest and listens to my heartbeat. I take this time to text Mason and let him know about our plans and he just says okay. I put my phone away and play with Harry’s hair until he ends up dozing off on my chest. I hate to bother him, but I can’t sleep like this on the couch so I shake him gently.
“I’m so sorry for falling asleep.” He mumbles while rubbing his eyes. “I was just so comfortable.
“That’s fine. I was just wondering if we could move to the bed?” I ask gently. He nods and gets up and leads me to his room. He motions for me to lay down and I do. He resumes his position on my chest and I wrap my arms around him.
I’m exactly where I want to be. With Harry. Happy. Content. Loved. Cherished. I can’t believe I could feel this happy. I never would have imagined.
I wake up the next morning and Harry is already awake, sitting up in bed on his phone. When he notices me, he sits his phone on the nightstand and cuddles up to my side. I hold him tightly.
“Good morning.” He says to me. “How did you sleep?”
“Really good.” I reply, my voice gravelly from sleep.
“Why’s that?” He asks with a smile. I decide to tease him a little bit.
“You have a really comfortable bed.” I joke, knowing I slept as good as I did because he held me all through the night, his affection not wavering once.
He chuckles at me before placing a soft kiss on my lips. He is tenderly caressing my body and tracing paths up to my neck where his hands rest softly. My heart rate picks up as his lips wander. When my breath catches, he slows to a stop and looks down at me.
“You okay, love?” He asks me.
“Yeah. Better than okay.” I tell him and he smiles.
“Can I-“ he hesitates, and it makes my hands start to shake with the anxiety. “Would you want to go any further? You can set the pace.” He offers and I feel my stomach drop.
I want to, I just don’t feel ready enough. Not for sex. Maybe just exploring but not sex. He must be able to read the expression on my face because he begins to back off and move his hands.
“It’s not that I don’t want to,” I say quickly. “Just not sex. Not right now. We can go up to that point.” I tell him, wanting him to come back and be closer to me.
“I don’t want to pressure you into something you’re not ready for. I know it’s a big step. We can just kiss if that’s all you want.” He reassures me and I feel myself calm a bit. He seems genuine. He seems patient. His face is kind. And that puts me at ease.
“I’d be willing to go to my boxers, but that’s it, if that’s okay?” I ask him and he smiles.
“Of course that’s okay love. You can set the pace.” He repeats his statement from earlier and I love him even more for being so kind.
Harry continues to kiss me and I feel like I’m flying. If I’m setting the pace, I should probably make the first move and show Harry what I mean. I slide my head down Harry’s chest as we kiss and I slowly pull the string on his pajama pants until it comes loose. He helps me pull them down his legs until they get tossed on the floor. He does the same to me and I help him get mine off and on the floor with his.
I can feel his hard length against me through his boxers and it surprises me at how aroused he already is. It also makes me feel guilty that we won’t be doing anything about that. But I try to focus on him. On the feeling of his lips on mine. I flip him over and straddle on top of him. I kiss down his neck and chest, and his breathing picks up because of it. Because of me.
I trail back up to his ear and whisper “Is it okay if this is all the farther I want to go?”
“Of course love. Whatever you want to do.” He says breathily as I nibble on his neck.
“Are you sure? Because I can see you’re-“
“Of course I’m sure. I’ll be okay. Just kiss me.” He practically begs and it surges me with a confidence I didn’t have before. I adjust my position. I leave a small mark on Harry’s chest as I trail my kisses back down to the waistband of his boxers and back up to his neck. He’s practically moaning already in my ear.
“Do it again. Mark me again.” He asks me and I give him what he wants. I start on his chest again and he tugs on my hair to bring me up. I look into his piercing green eyes. “You can mark my neck. It’s okay.”
“Okay.” Is all I can say, my body working faster than my brain. I latch on to his neck and he moans in my ear. Small purple marks begin to show my path across his body and he’s loving every second of it.
He eventually flips me over and repays me every kiss that I gave him. I tell him he can mark me too, just not my neck. I like to keep mine hidden under my clothes. Purple marks scatter on my skin like paint and I can hardly breathe.
When we are both satisfied with marking each other up, we lay side by side and mar out until we both calm down and peck lazily. I can still see how turned on Harry is, and the guilt pricks at me.
“I’m sorry.” I say softly. He shakes his head when he realizes what I’m apologizing for.
“Don’t be sorry. I loved every second of that.”
“But you’ll be frustrated. I should-“
“You don’t have to do anything. I’m not mad that you don’t want to go any farther right now. I won’t be frustrated. I’ll be okay. Just need a few minutes to calm down.” He reassures me, placing a kiss on my forehead. “I love you.”
“I love you.” I tell him. I mean it. It means the world to me that he respects me and my boundaries. He isn’t frustrated by me not wanting sex. He loves me for who I am. All of me. And I couldn’t ask for anything more.
We still have to work with Mason. We still have some things to iron out. But overall I’m happy. We are doing great. And I never imagined I’d be here.
“Are you ready to start the day love? Coffee or tea?” Harry asks me and I smile.
My Brother’s Best Friend part 3 is finished! I just have to edit it and then it will be posted. I am unsure of if there will be a part 4 or not, depending on feedback I could continue it or stop it where it is. Thank you guys so much for your patience!
I’ve been writing a small little fic for The Prophecy by Taylor Swift. It hasn’t even left the drafts because it isn’t finished yet and it already has a content label review stuck on it? For just pasting the lyrics? There’s not enough story for it to need flagged and what story there is isn’t flag worthy. Why am I get a content label?
So I’d like to make a post describing all of my drafts because in every single bit of writing I am stuck, so this is a long one. Also if you don’t want spoilers for future works don’t look below the cut.
My Brother’s Best Friend 3 - exploring Harry and Calum’s relationship, but Mason finds out and they have to deal with that.
“Are you jealous?” - a prompt from a while back. So far all I have is OC wanting to go to a friend’s house and Harry gets jealous. I kind of wrote the main scene first and was trying to work around it but I’m stuck.
“I need you to be okay. I need you to wake up. Please.” - Harry and OC are in a car accident and have to be taken to the hospital. I’ve written the crash scene but I’m stuck at the hospital part.
An unnamed fic I haven’t started but is about a soulmate au where your world is black and white until you touch your soulmate and the world comes to life.
Any ideas are welcome and I’ll even @ you on the story. I’m just so stuck recently and I want to write but every time I do I get stuck. Just send an ask! Thank you so much!
