( — HYLAND GOSSIP ! )

it's too late for all that "lovey-dovey shit," "i'm your brother" shit, all that other shit it's too late for all that !!

[hylandtea]

me: already obsessed with noah kim bye

me: definitely obsessed with noah kim as well. i’m enjoying him while i can, though. it’s only a matter of time before one of you yuckies here corrupts him.

[hylandtea]

whats up with preston and messi i saw em arguing one time

i’m not completely sure. something about an internship and him cheating on her? which i’m sure no one is surprised by.

[hylandtea]

what happened to carmen at the party? she disappeared with lil

carmen... was a lot during that party. apparently she was tripping on some pills? something about getting in a pool almost naked. and then lillian and her left after a while. they’re a weird combination, i can’t really see them together but maybe they fucked back on campus.

[hylandtea]

eden is an angel walking amongst devils

okay, no. you’re putting that girl on way too high of a pedestal.

[hylandtea]

who's most likely to get their heart broken and by who?

i feel like alex’s heart has been breaking every day the past week. carmen seems like she’d give her all to someone and they wouldn’t return it, so i’d say those two. spencer’s gonna’ get his heart broken by the twitter platform.

[hylandtea]

spencillian sounds like penicillin

hey. lillian. your name sucks.

[hylandtea]

opinion on parker? jayden? carmen? caroline? lola?

parker - haven’t seen much of him to form a solid opinion, so he’s fine for now. he was a bit of a party pooper during homecoming week, though.

jayden - too beautiful for this campus, no wonder he’s got girl drama surrounding him.

carmen - cute but needs a guardian supervising her at all times.

caroline - unproblematic legend. keep doing you, boo.

lola - barely see her.

[hylandtea]

what's going on between shiloh and alex?

do they even know what’s going on between them? i feel like if you put them on a deserted island with the one task of collecting firewood they’d just spend hours going you’re my best friend, you pick up the sticks. no, i won’t let you, you mean too much to me. but what does that mean? why does it matter what it means? you are the oxygen in my lungs and the breeze in my hair -- you should pick up the stick. i should let you have someone else pick it up. no, i want you to pick up the stick. i don’t deserve to pick up the stick. and then die because they never get anything done.

[hylandtea]

who do you think is the most sketchy?

it goes without saying that dom is weird. she walks into a room and the lights start flickering and your phone battery drains. logan’s also like… suspiciously stupid. 

[hylandtea]

who do you think would date who?

i’d like to see lillian and spencer together, honestly. alex is too wishy-washy for that poor boy. although, spillian (lencer? lilcer. spencian. …spencillian?) probably would be messy if it came to light because girl code, ya’know? situationships count as relationships in my book.

oh, wow, can you imagine a fight between lillian and alex? i’d love to see that.

[hylandtea]

if you could cast the students as people from the office, who would be who?

i don’t watch the office, i don’t think it’s funny. don’t try and suggest parks and rec next, either. i also don’t watch that.

i can do students as breakfast club characters, though? clueless characters? i can even do mcu characters but only like 2 of you would get the references.

[hylandtea]

what's the tea ?

oh, the tea has been piping recently. i might be forgetting some things, but lillian and eden have issues because of jayden, logan and lillian are having some familial beef, carmen needs to just … stay home for a month and not move, i heard that alex and sawyer were yelling at each other, that same stupid love triangle between shiloh, alex, and spencer is still going on, and oh, spencer. 

he’s a mother fucker. but is anyone surprised? i’m sure if you went out in public with him you’d notice all the old ladies staring at him. he’d be the type of guy to be all, don’t worry, susan, i’ll help you push your stroller across the street. and then fuck her later on, i guess? i wonder what his age limit is. still, sucks that everyone knows now. i imagine it might be hard for him to get into a serious relationship with this hanging over his head. what do you think he uses the money for?

[hylandtea]

hahahaha. that was funny as hell. i knew you lot were up to no damn good. i can’t wait to find out everyone’s dirty little secret. no wonder the cops think one of you punks did it. so spencer’s shacking it up with old women for money, huh? talk about desperate. but hey, gotta secure the bag, right?

[hylandtea]

who do you think is gonna be crazy enough to have a quickie in edens bed tonight?

preston. and he’s going to be having that quickie with eden. 

[hylandtea]

any new tea?

maybe. you do know there’s a secret drop tomorrow, right? look out for that. i know i’m looking forward to that. better hope the secret’s not yours.

[hylandtea]

logan looks like a meerkat

i... just spit out my drink. logan, i hope you see this.

[hylandtea]

are you excited for homecoming? do you think there will be any drama?

oh, there will definitely be drama. a bunch of you crazies are going to be shoved into eden’s estate all together this weekend -- there’s either going to be a fight, a fight, or a fight. i can’t wait.