Have you completely lost it?
Have you lost that familiar feeling? Have you completely lost sight of who you were? As poised as you once dreamt of being, or as troubled as you never wished to be? Have you fallen down into a vicious cycle of rumination, constant reminders of a construction of the life you never had, but held high hopes up for?
It's troubling to see yourself in a light that you never thought would shine through you. Perhaps the darkness that flows through your veins is accustomed to being there, it is comfortable, it is the norm. Perhaps seeing yourself in a bright light is frightening. We are not used to seeing stars during daylight, only in darkness can they shine. So we get used to that feeling, that feeling of fending for oneself. It's like we are trained to be our own saviour. No matter how tough the battle is, we recognize our strengths and see life as the trajectory filled with villains we need to protect ourselves from. We get used to the barricades, to the naysayers, to the heartbreakers. We do not let them get to us, at least that 's what we want you to believe.
We strive for greatness or succumb to the incessant stress of trying to please. And suddenly, when we meet an individual that doesn't fit our mold of a villain, that clearly does not melt into a construct we conjure up, we lose it. We lose our familiar characteristics. We blab into oblivion and shield ourselves from potential turmoil. We classify that individual as unfit for us while silently protesting our emotional decision.
This is the story of human beings. This is the story of the one's who cannot seem to realize that there is more to life than to repeat history.
I hope to learn from it , someday...