summary: even a man with nothing like peter will give her his everything. there's nothing he wouldn't do for you.
warning: contains brand new day spoilers, not proofread, english is not my first language
after being forgotten by the world, peter decided that it was best to never bother you again.
plus, would you even believe him? you've told him stories on how desperate some people have become just to be close to you and your family. you are smart, radical, and critical. if a man wearing his diy suit told you stephen strange made it so that you along with every human population forget his true identity and that you two are inlove with plans of spending your future together you would never believe him—right?
he sees you on the news attending press conferences, meetings, and parties. watching you from afar is more than enough for him.
would he even have a chance to get close to you with all the guards and cameras that monitors you 24/7?
imagine his surprise when the news broke out that you are missing.
apparently you walked out, jumped in an unmarked vehicle and just disappeared in the night. the world is used to your missing presence. hence the worry came to be. but nobody has any idea where you might be.
peter was not about to give up. just when he was searching for answers or even a sliver of clue it came for him.
he was slouching on the side of the street. he is feeling nauseous either from the nonstop swinging or lack of rest in search of you. as he was trying to push through an elderly lady tapped his shoulder. he was caught off guard by the contact but immediately calmed when he sees the person appears to mean no harm.
she handed her a piece of bread. "you seem hungry, spider-man." peter knew that if he denied the food his body would betray him. before he could thank her she continued. "you can't find her if you die. only you would know where she could possibly be."
those words seemed to make every aching part of his body heal. "where is she?" tears brimmed his covered eyes. jean jumped to another passer-by.
"you know, you are not in any of her memories so i searched for moments with missing chunks." she jumped to another vessel once more.
"jean i swear to god—"
"i need you to get out of my business, peter. she's running out of time." the random pedestrian convulsed. "spider-man? what happened?"
instead of answering he swung.
he relieved every moment that the two of you shared. something big enough for it to have left a gap in your memory.
a memory special only to you two.
you and peter are in malibu, somewhere near your childhood home. a location nobody knew of. not pepper, any of your guards, or even your late father. you drag him there every time you have the opportunity to borrow spider-man from the world. a place where you can escape the watchful eyes of the public and him just be peter.
before you entered your sacred sanctuary he asked to cover your eyes to not spoil his gift. "peter, you know you don't have to give me gifts. tangible things just don't impress me anymore." you said half jokingly.
"if there is anything in the world that you would want right now, what would it be?" he asked still covering your eyes.
"what if i said that i want the stars? would you steal them for me?" you asked teasingly.
"i was hoping you'd say that." he peeled off his palms from your eyes. you adjusted your eyes and the scenery before you caused your breathing to hitch.
in the room, illumination of the outer space. the stars enveloped you as the light of the projector passes through you. it was a beautiful scene. the breeze brought by the night imitated the coolness of the sky.
you are in awe of the whole room. "the projector doesn't give justice to how cool space is but it's close." his hands slivered, finding its place on your lower back.
you draped your arms draped over his shoulders. "if i didn't know better, i'd think you're just bragging on having been in space." your hand scrunched the back of his head along with a giggle. "but thank you peter. for this night, for staying, and for knowing me."
"only the best for you. i don't have a lot, you know that." he took one of your hands, held it close to his heart. "but there is nothing in this world that i wouldn't do for you." there is a sincerity in his eyes that you have yet to see in anyone else in your life. "nothing."
"what if i wanted the moon next? how would you give it to me, peter?" you said it with no trace of humor. you said it as the girl who can have any have anything in her possession. a girl who grew up only knowing the lavish and luxurious life.
"then i will learn to fly. the rest of the world would just have to adjust. the night would just have to be pitch black." he stared intently through your eyes. "you deserve the world, even the moon."
you closed the small gap between the two of you. as your lips link with tenderness his hand went from your jaw to the back of your neck as if he was afraid you would leave.
"i love you. i love you more than anything."
you do not how you got here. one moment you are working then the next you are in your secret hideout not a single recollection of you ended up in the place. you are bound in metal chair. with not a single thing that could help you. the first few hours you did your best to try free yourself. there are hours you rested to try collect your energy. it was a cycle until your wrist are on the verge of falling off. you couldn't see but with how it feels you know that it would be red and raw from all your attempts of freeing yourself.
you are regretting that you never told anyone about the place. you accepted that this might be your end. on the bright side, you will see your father again, you will finally meet your grandparents.
your head hang low until you heard someone banging at the door.
you tried your hardest to keep your consciousness. you saw a red silhouette hurrying to get to you.
you felt the need to not fight it anymore. you can finally be at peace.
SEND IN SOME SMOSH FIC REQUEST YA'LL. I got two weeks before uni starts. I know I haven't been active lately, before my sched gets busy again I want to feed y'all!!!
Damien Haas x Fem!Reader / Theodore "Todd" Hull x Fem!Character
Summary: In an attempt to commit to the bit you found yourself questioning your feelings for your co-star
A/N: WAKE UP DAMIEN GIRLIES. Please other authors write about him too, I need more of this guy.
You are sweating balls. If that's even a saying.
For an episode of Bit City you are to play a character—a woman that's put together, a good career, and conventionally beautiful to put it lightly.
However, she is dating a straight guy so full of himself. Flirting with every woman he sees, and unemployed. Pretty much a retired frat boy. Todd.
The main issue wasn't even the fact that your boyfriend is pure trash. It's his friend, Eric, whom he listens to more than his own girlfriend.
When the cast list was released you knew nothing could ever prepare you for what's to come. Damien was cast for the character Todd, aka your boyfriend. While Shayne is Eric.
Their duo was perfectly cast and at the same time a pure nightmare. The two of them are comedic geniuses who are not afraid of going low even if it will be bad for their digital footprint.
Not to add, Damien is one of the most unpredictable people you know. His mind is also unnaturally quick with coming up with witty responses that there are moments that he catches you off guard.
During the meeting you have established key points about the characters, but the entirety would have to be improvised. The nerves you got did not vanish even on the shoot day.
You are dressed in a very put together manner. Hair neat. Clothes pressed. Sitting beside you is Damien, wearing a red polyester jersey, hair intentionally unkept.
"Good luck out there, Sweets." He said as he reached out for you noticeably tense shoulders, that relaxed under his touch.
Erin soon signaled that the cameras are about roll. You took one long and heavy breath, preparing yourself from what's about to come.
Angela started the intro for Bit City then he asked the two of you to introduce yourselves Damien went first. "Theodore Richard Hull, but you can call me anytime." He sent a wink towards Angela. To which the two of you reacted.
"Baby, what the hell?" You said, frustration laced heavily on your voice.
He reached out to pat your hair, "I'm joshin', Baby. I'm joshin'. Call me Todd. I love when you're so protective of me."
"I love it when you do things that you know will piss me off." You sat farther from the couch with your arms crossed in front of you.
"Why are you with this loser?" Angela asked. "Is that why you're here? Don't tell me you're dating this guy willingly." Her eyes judging your decision.
“What do you mean? He's perfect. It's his friend.” You said, clinging to his arm. You then went on about how he has been listening to what his friend is saying rather than you, his own girlfriend.
“I see. Let's call for Todd's best friend, Eric!” Angela declared.
On queue, Shayne went out to the center stage wearing the same jersey Damien is wearing. “Bro!” Shayne said pointing at Damien's similar top. A few exchanges of bros later they finally settled.
The show went on with everyone on the couch adding chaos, forcing your brain to process everything at an unnatural pace. You were barely holding it together. Barely keeping up with the exchange of banter.
You tried looking at people on the other side of the camera to find support, but no. Most if not all of them are cracking up with the gravity of the situation.
You're on your own, it seems.
“You know what, I am done. I don't want this environment for me and my baby.” You then stood up from the couch.
Your revelation received gasps from everyone in the room.
“That's right, I am pregnant.” Your hands made their way on top of your flat appearing stomach.
“You're telling me we're having Theodore Richard 'Todd' Hull Junior?” He stood facing you, kneading his barely grown facial hair. “Baby, I am so happy I can kiss you right now.”
Due to the spur of the moment, you dared him. “Do it then. If you really love me and Theodore Richard 'Todd' Hull Junior, kiss me. Kiss me in front of the whole world.”
By this time, jaws are on the floor. Shayne and Angela visibly shocked and pumped for what's about to happen.
Their reactions are a blur to you. Your eyes are fixated on Damien's. No more words were uttered, or maybe noise was blocked by your ears.
One thing you are certain of. Damien is leaning in, closer than he has ever been before. Your mind memorized the moles on his lower left cheek sitting just above his neatly buzzed beard.
His breath reeks of something familiar. You did not care enough about what as your mind could only think of what it would feel.
You prepared yourself. Closing your eyes and puckering your lips.
“Actually, as much as everyone in the studio would like to see it happen, according to our producers we must keep it appropriate for our impressionable audience and monetizable, of course.” Angela said, waking you up from your delusion.
Just as you snapped back from reality you also went back to your character.
“That's all the time we have, so I advise that you guys resolve this privately, like what you should have done in the first place.” Angela then did the outro and soon enough Erin declared cut.
You were greeted with "good job" greetings from everyone. Your heartbeat was still inhumanly beating fast.
Once you were in the dressing room, carefully removing hair clips that are keeping the wig on your head. You struggled with detaching it due to a clip you can't seem to locate.
As Damien entered, he saw you struggle. His instant reply was to help you. His gentle hand pulled the pin out. He lifted the wig slowly, like he was afraid to break you.
He also took the initiative to place it back in its bag. “Thank you.” You said offering him a smile through the mirror of the vanity.
“No worries!” He exclaimed with his sweet enthusiasm as he made his way behind the changing divider. “Good job earlier by the way. People are gonna love that episode.”
“That's really sweet, Dames. You did really well too. I love how committed you get when we do acts like these. I was so worried I wouldn't be able to keep up with you and Shayne.” He left the divider changed into his normal dark clothing.
"What do you mean, you always do a good job." He placed his hand on your shoulder as he reached for his glasses that happened to be in front of you.
It was only a few second, but the warmth of his hand sent chills all over your body. "I was worrying because of unpredictable you guys are. You're really good at this, Mr. Disney Star."
"Oh please, you were so good. You're too committed to the bit, we almost kissed." He looked you in the eye through his clear lenses.
You don't know how he was able to say that to you eye to eye, and with his genuine smile. For a second you did not know what to say. His reaction was hard for you to read. Is he trying to hint something in between.
“Yeah,” Was all you could come up with.
You sat there, eyes lifted to meet his with a mix of curiosity and longing—like you were silently asking for something, anything from him.
There was a quiet plea written across your face. In that moment, you looked achingly beautiful.
You could have sworn he felt it too—you hoped he did. The softness of his gaze as he examined your face.
“You should probably change so we can catch up to lunch.” He traveled his eyes on you, not maliciously but out of control. “Wearing a blazer that thick can't be comfortable.”
You asked for him to wait for you and he promised to comply.
You went behind the wall to change. You hadn't realized that you've gotten goosebumps.
You told yourself to snap out of it. You quickened your pace knowing he is behind the wall waiting for you.
There is the assured part of your mind that knew he'd be there waiting. Yet somehow, you feared that he'd leave.
Damien is not that kind of man. He'd wait for you to be ready, even if it takes over his entire shift.
You are right.
The two of you were not really the closest before. But after that film day something changed. Like, the beanstalk that sprouted reaching up the sky over night. You were seeing things about him that you would not have paid attention to before.
On day offs, the two of you would be on constant contact, checking up on one another.
Your talks with him were something you looked forward to. Even the work related once.
But what you are most fond of is when he talks about his hobbies, although there are times when you don't get what he was talking about he'd explain it to you in grave details. You love seeing the sparkle in his eyes when he talks about things he is most passionate about.
Furthermore, he is an awesome listener. You felt seen and validated when you are ranting to him. Damien listens with an open mind, no judgement. Someone you can discuss anything with.
One day, he checked on what you did during the weekend. You were lost for words because you can't tell him that you were replaying Tiktok ship edits of the two of you or how you were rewatching Youtube clip compilations of him while enjoying bags of chips. "Nothing, just binged watch reruns of Modern Family." was the safest answer you could come up with.
What caught you off-guard was when he asked for plans for the next weekend. The week was just starting. Where is this conversation going? Could he be...
"What about movie at my house?" He asked, casually.
Your assumption was right. "Can't wait to finally meet your cute kitties." You could have sworn your voice cracked.
The remainder of the week came and went excruciatingly slow. That night was all you could think about. This being your first exclusive hang out.
When the day of came you stood too long in front of his door. With a non-alcoholic red wine on your hand. In your mind you are trying to come up with the best greeting. While lost in thought his door flung open.
This caught the two of you off guard.
"How long have you been standing there?" He expressed his concern due to the hot weather.
"I was just about to knock, how did know I was out there?" You made your way into his warm home.
"Just a hunch. Or maybe we're just telepathically intertwined like that." He humored. You handed him a bottle you brought.
"It's non-alcoholic because you don't do alcohol. I listen, you see." leaving a chuckle as you bat your lashes to him.
Damien knew that for him there was no need for a movie. He could simply just watch you and be entertained by the way the words leave your mouth or when your eyes do the talking for you.
But, as promised there will be a movie night. He wasn't sure he would be able to focus with you by his side.
He led you to his living room. There are blankets set up like those in slumber parties with bowls of chips and popcorn. Once you were near enough you saw his cats Zelda and Freyja contributing to the fluff of the blankets.
The cats snuggled up to you as though they knew you. This caught you by surprise since he mentioned how his cats are not fond of new people, like their dad.
Like Damien, they found your presence comforting and warm.
Came the time when the two of you have abandoned the movie to engage in personal conversation, it was more fun that way anyways, thought the both of you.
You two spent the whole night talking. Nothing specific, but somehow it meant everything to you.
It was a known knowledge that Damien is one of the sweetest souls out there. But this night brought you a deeper understanding of what kind of man he really is. His entire being reeks of genuineness.
The way ge acts, speaks, and thinks wowed you. If you had taken the time to get to know him before you would have found out sooner that he is all you have been looking for.
This gave you all the courage to lean in. Mid talk, unprovoken, took both of you by surprise.
He held your face and closed the remaining gap between the two of you. His gentle caresses are on your neck and jaw.
Neither of you expected it. It just felt right.
All real. No act.
A/N: Thank you for reading! This was heavily inspired by these gifs made by @haasmaxxing
Summary: Hidden feelings of two people about the oblivious other.
Request: HIII!! it’s totally fine if this isn’t possible but can i request an alex tran x reader oneshot where alex and reader are close friends and have been crushing on eachother for awhile and everyone in the office knows except them? i love alex sm and there not enough about him! thank you!! have a good day !!! <3 - Anon
Author's Note: To Anon, I'm sorry this took so long to write. Thank you for requesting this, Alex is just so majestic and every time he appears on camera I lose control of myself. Please send in more requests and ideas of what you want to see next!
Being on Smosh is one of the best things that ever happened to you. It was stable enough for you financially, and at the same time you got to pursue two of your dream jobs at a time, being a cast members and producer.
Hence, befriending Alex, who shares a similar enough job, came easy. Because other than your occupation, the two of you don't share other similarities. Like the dusk and the dawn. Making your duo unexpected to most people.
Befriending Alex is something that just happened. Instant connection and undeniable chemistry. The two of you can talk for hours nonstop without dead air.
Unbeknownst to you, your dear friend has been having a secret infatuation towards you. Everyone, from crew and cast to your actual viewers, sees it. Everyone but you.
During the Smosh Games meetings Alex would take his time explaining every single function and rule of the game. Everyone in the room would notice his lingering glances at you. How he'd blush as you listen to him intently. How he would perk up every time you had a question, like all he wanted to do was inform you.
His attentiveness to what you do even transcends to the videos. He would correct a misunderstood rule to your benefit. He would also defend you to the rest of the players. Hell, he wouldn't do that for Spencer.
The two of you would brush off the teasing and the game's producer's blatant favoritism.
For one episode of Duo You Know Your Duo, Crew vs. Cast, where you and Tommy went against Alex and Spencer. The scores are close. For one question you and Spencer were asked, “What are the names of your partner's siblings?”.
You were the one to go first, you stated that Tommy does not have any siblings, which you got wrong.
As for Spencer, he turned his paddle that has a name you are unaware of. “I know he has a sister, but I'm not sure if I got the name right.”
Alex replied with a laugh due to the name being not even remotely close.
“Coach, I actually knew that. Do I get an extra point?” You said turning your head towards Arasha.
“Mind your own partner,” was all she replied with.
“Alex, now you know who your real best friend is.” You writhe your brows at him playfully.
Spencer added "You don't know your own partners siblings." The two of you erupted into a chaotic argument of who knows Alex more.
Alex burst into a captivating giggle. It was one of those effortless quirks of his that never failed to make your heart flutter. The way his eyes crinkled at the corners—his pupils vanishing, his shoulders slightly shaking with the weight of his amusement—it was disarmingly genuine.
Just as you caught yourself fawning over him, you straightened yourself. You continued with the video-exchanging knowing glances and nods of curtseys. Right after filming the video the two of you were asked to stay behind for thumbnail.
You questioned why you two when you both are partnered with different people. The producers brushed it off by saying 'capturing both teams'.
The idea that there is mischievous intent, but you didn't press further.
Neither of you are oblivious to your ship. You've seen the edits and clip compilations of your interactions people made even through clip where he can't even be seen in the camera. You thought nothing of it. People would ship people to anyone even with the littlest interaction.
"They did it for the shippers." Alex leaned down to your level as he whispered.
You replied with a chuckle, "Can't wait for my velocity edits. I look especially good today, I believe.” You did not want to add to his comment about the people wanting the two of you together. Talking about topics that include feelings are something you avoid with everyone.
You are aware that your admiration towards Alex is close to surpassing the heights of being platonic. Maybe it already has.
You don't dare figure it out. Hell, you avoid even thinking about it. Your mind is already convinced that the worst case possible would happen.
He would find out about your silly little feelings, you will get rejected, he will tell you that the two of you can remain friends which is a lie—no one ever remains friends after being friend zoned. The two of you would just be stuck in an awkward situation. Your inability of expressing what you feel is keeping you from acting. In fear that what you might say will drive him away.
In addition, you don't handle rejection easily. Your immaturity forbids you to handle it like an adult. This would send your mental state into a downward spiral.
You don't even dare consider that he too might feel the same, but you would rather not find out at all. Genuinely, you treasure your friendship with Alex, something not worth loosing over unrequited feelings.
In short, you would rather not know.
Unbeknownst to you that's how he feels too. The difference is that he is more optimistic to what the two of you could be.
Alex is a man of few words. He's the type of guy who doesn't ask. He just listens, remember, and act. And when he jokes it is always a hit for you. He caught himself trying to craft more jokes as a desperate attempt of hearing you laugh. But most of the time he just tries to be there
The first time he saw you set the vegetable aside he asked for the reason. You told him that it's because you are simply not a fan of the taste. "I know it's childish to not eat the pepper I just can't get myself to eat it."
"You can give them to me." He said leaning his plate towards you. he also stated his love for the vegetable. "I love them."
"That's concerning. Are you serious?" Was what you said as you transferred them to his plate.
"I really do. Feel free to give them to me anytime."
During film week-cast get to line up for catering first. Alex usually comes few minutes late to lunch as often times he'd get too occupied by his work.
No matter how late he is everyone knew that the seat next to you is reserved for him. He'd sit next to you. Before eating he'd check your plate for capsicum and takes it himself without interrupting your conversation with Tommy who sat infront of you.
When they first saw the two of you act that way you were met with teasing. But as time passed by, along with your consistent insistence of being just friends, it died down. They learned to live with the fact that the two of you will remain being just friends with heaps of romantic tendencies.
The two of you would have been contented with the state of your relationship. Satisfied? No.
But contented, nonetheless.
No secret ever remains a secret. Even the greatest athletes slip from time to time.
When Alex was discussing with Shayne, Spencer, and Damien—his Games Pod Bros, about video ideas. They planned about making another Love Is Blind episode. Then talked about who they should cast.
Damien suggested putting you, "She's so charismatic. She'll do great with anyone."
Alex reacted what he thought he did internally. However, the intensity of his furrowed brows. His reaction caught the attention the of people in the meeting.
"I don't mean it that way, man." Damien explained that you are charismatic and currently is into reality dating shows.
The explanation caught Alex off-guard. Has he been too obvious? Did he react out of line? It was as though he just got caught doing war crimes.
He questioned why Damien felt the need to clarify what he meant. To which he replied with “You reacted with what I said, plus I've been seeing the two of you be close— Listen man, you know I have a hard time reading the room.”
This broke Alex. The meeting turned to him admitting his not so secret admiration to his friends. They encouraged him to finally tell you alongside an assurance that they believe that you too feel for him.
It didn't take him much convincing. He knows what he feels and he'll act on them.
Courage took over him. Whatever happens, it is what it is. All or nothing.
In terms of gambling, he's all in.
He saw you in one of the halls of the Smosh office. You turned slowly as he called for your name—like a scene from a movie. As he made his way towards you he wished his footsteps would go faster.
He fought the urge of just coming undone right there and then. But the remaining sanity of his body allowed him to escort you to a private enough area.
You were tripping balls, for the lack of better words. You have no idea on what's going on and what's about to happen.
This wasn't like Alex at all. He has never pulled you away to another room. Wherever you are are a good enough place to talk. He never felt the need to be secretive with the interaction between the two of you.
“Are you ok? This is so not like you.” Concern thick on your tone..
“Of course. This is not like me because you know how I am. You know me better than anyone in my life.” Alex said as he captured your eye. “I like you. I like you more than a best friend should. I could never hide anything from you. I have been living in the hope that you felt it too. I know that saying this will change us.”
The words got caught at the back of your throat. Your wildest dream unfolds right in front of you.
Words could not describe what you are feeling. Instead of saying anything you let your actions talk.
You leaned in. Your lips reached his and it felt like everything. It felt special, right, and freeing at the same time.
He reciprocated the affection you have given him. His hand caressed the lover side of your face. His hand was so gentle yet eager to never let you go.
As the two of you parted he asked, “Be my girlfriend?”
You darted him with your warmest smile. “I thought you'd never ask.”
The exclusivity of the two of you was surreal. If this was indeed a dream you wish to never wake up. Stay stuck there forever.
It was all you could ever wish for and more. It was like a bottle of finely aged wine, popped at the right time.
Your love is quiet, but it is all you could ever ask of.
Summary: In a journey in search for something new, he meets a girl that got him coming back for more.
Request: Hello! I don't know if you accept Ian requests but if you do, can you write basically the reader approaches him at a bar/coffee shop and compliments him? The rest will be up to your liking ^^ - Anon
Note: Not Proofread
This coffee shop was not his usual. It was out of his way to work. Impractical to go to.
It all began when he was running early to work and decided to visit the coffee shop a friend recommended. As he waited in line, the girl in front of him ordered. She started with her drink, but what caught his attention was when she said, “four shots of espresso.”
His interest in her perked. He wondered why someone would need that much caffeine. When they had both sat down, his table was in a corner near the glass window. A couple of tables down was hers.
He noticed that from time to time his gaze would fall on her. He observed that her eyes would only fall on her laptop screen or notepad. Sipping on her coffee from time to time. Every time she does, he will look for a reaction on her face. Her immunity to the bitterness of the drink amazed him.
That's how he fell into a new routine where he would purposely make time in the morning just so he could get coffee at the same time as you.
Your order wasn't the same every time. You would try variations of pastries and beverages, but one thing is certain. Four shots of espresso.
When the weekend rolled around, you weren't there. This caught him off guard. He redirected his attention to his task.
Through his peripheral, someone sat on the table mentally reserved for you. Only to be disappointed as his eyes saw a woman that is not registered in his mind.
The weekend rush filled the shop to the brim. Every table was occupied.
When you came in, you made the mistake of ordering before checking for an empty table. You stood looking around like an awkward high schooler during lunch break.
During your search, your eyes landed on a man in a corner. You've seen him before. He usually is behind you in line. Some other times while you were at your table you would hear him ask for gluten-free options in pastries and substitution of almond milk for his drink. Gluten-Free Man.
You decided to ask the stranger if you can sit with him. You have never really interacted before other than polite smiles and nods of acknowledgement.
“Hi, is anybody sitting here?” He looked up at you, startled. “Sorry to bother. There are no other empty tables. Do you mind if I...” Instead of finishing your sentence, you pointed at the empty seat across from him.
“Yeah, of course.” He tidied some of his belongings that were scattered on the table. “Ian.” He held out his hand for you to take.
“Ivy, nice shirt by the way.” You took your seat. His shirt was nothing special. It was a tan mocha color with the word 'smosh' embossed. But somehow it made him stand out. In the best ways of course.
“Oh, this? It's our merch, actually.” This piqued your curiosity. It was not unusual to meet people who work in the industry, considering the fact that you live in Los Angeles. You asked about what he does.
But then something hit you. Familiarity.
Smosh.
Ian.
Somehow it rang a bell inside your brain. “Wait, do you do YouTube?” he nodded. “I think I recognize you. You do skits, right? Smosh?” He once again said yes. “I think I've seen your stuff before when I was in high school.” You added. Beyond the shock there were also glints of astonishment in your reaction.
“I mean, it's always nice to meet a fan. But no pictures.” His humorous assertions caused you to let out a cackle. “What about you? I always see you so concentrated on your laptop. You didn't even budge when those rowdy group of teens entered a few days ago.”
“Oh, I'm in my fourth year of Med School. Kind of part of the job to be not easily distracted.” You took a sip of your beverage.
“Doctor? I don't hear that often around here. That's like a real job.” He spoke. “That explains the four shots of espresso then.”
“Oh, not this one though.” You lifted the cup in your hand. “I'm trying to chill for the weekend. Wake up a little later. Less caffeine. It's doctor's advice.”
“Can't even imagine how tired you are. I can't imagine myself using my brain that much.” Your laughs to his banter came out naturally. “I bet that you'll look even better in a lab coat. Not that you don't look good now.” He panicked slightly.
“Too much flattery on the first talk. Save some for the second date.” You said with a humorous tone.
You enjoyed talking to him. The topic came out naturally. No dead air. Your ears managed to block the noise of the busy establishment.
Neither of you realized that hours have passed. The two of you exchanged numbers before parting ways.
That's how it all started. Only a few days have passed yet the two of you have gotten used to the company of the other.
You appreciated how much he respects you and your time. There would be moments where you couldn't answer his calls and text due to your busy schedule. Instead of losing interest like guys usually would, Ian would leave messages of encouragement.
You cherish every joke he makes. Whether it's an absolute banger or another one of his cheesy puns that he definitely took online.
He adores your entire being. He likes how much smarter you are compared to him. How you show interest in what he does. How you don't see him as another influencer trying to make it big in LA. And the fact that you are simply showing interest in him. Having you now made him realize that he doesn't want to let the connection between the two of you go.
On your morning coffees the two of you have now been sharing tables he would stay for an hour and tell you he'd have to go to work.
On this day, it was you who noticed the time. “You should be heading to your office.” You said darting your eyes from your phone clock to him.
“I actually have a day off. I have something personal that I want to do today.” You thought of a joke about him being the boss but instead you refrained yourself.
There is a seriousness in his tone. This doesn't slip out of him often so you decide to question. “Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, of course. Never better actually. But there's something I want to ask you.” He licked his lips as he tried to compose what he wanted to say. “Can we be exclusive? I have this feeling where I've known you my whole life. Every time I leave you in this coffee shop all I can think about was the next time I'll see you again. Can we make this official?” You were caught in his words that you didn't even realize that he is now holding both your hands.
“How could I say no? I would love to go official with you, Ian.” Your eyes looked back at him with if not more, equal adoration.
He looked at you and he knew. Ian has never felt this much certainty with anyone else. Just you.
Summary: Liking your boss is hard but trying to keep it from your coworkers and the world is even harder. Or your oblivion brought you somewhere you can only imagine.
I was never supposed to happen this way.
You were a guest in the Reddit Stories alongside Trevor. The story was about a girl having a reciprocated feeling with his boss who is currently in a relationship.
“I get that you can't really control who you like. But, at the end of the day, you are responsible for your actions and choices.” Shayne stated.
“Yeah, also I don't really get liking your co-worker, more so your boss.” Trevor said, with a small chuckle.
“No, I get catching feelings for your co-worker or boss, been there. But knowing that the other person was already in a relationship and still pursuing them?” You didn't mean to say that.
“You know what it's like to have feelings for your co-worker?” Asked Shayne.
This moment felt like one of those ‘you can hear a pin drop’ scenario. “I beg please cut that out.”
The thing is Smosh is your first and only job.
During the pandemic few years into college you decided to put your editing capabilities into good use. A job. You became an editor for Smosh Pit, while it was still under Mythical Entertainment. That led to an opportunity to be part of the cast.
You spewed other bullshit like “don't be the reason for another woman's pain.” as a form of save.
Even if the editors have cut that out and that footage will not see the day of light, enough people have heard it. In addition you are surrounded by people who knew you well that would have clocked what you said.
They can't really blame you.
When Anthony came back to Smosh, he took time to get to know every cast and crew.
Maybe by then you have gotten a small crush due to his easygoing nature. What you thought was an itty-bitty crush grew through every interaction that you'll have with him.
You were captivated by how he clapped even though you were not able to get a laugh from the person in the stool in Try Not To Laugh. Or when he'd explain old Smosh reference that you couldn't catch with a smile on his face. And by even simply greeting you good morning, how are you, and his sickeningly sweet affirmations.
Maybe this crush of yours started way before you even joined the company. How the younger version you came across a YouTube channel where you saw a guy with a bowl cut with his friend whose hair was straightened, covering the entirety of his forehead, making skit-comedy sometimes injuring themselves.
But who knows, you have done a good job of trying to conceal crushing on your boss for the longest time and you are not revealing it now.
Like you expected, words traveled fast. Few minutes after Shayne said the outro and Bailey declared 'cut'. You went straight to the restroom and when you stepped outside you saw people talking amongst themselves. Innocent enough. You though.
In one of the cafeteria tables Shayne, Courtney, Trevor, Angela, Chance and Tommy are huddled. Talking in low voices you are not able to hear due to the distance. Shayne's eyes darted on you and sat straight. The others did too and looked at you. You can sense the awkwardness of the air when they greet you.
“You guys couldn't wait a minute before spreading what I said earlier.” You said plopping next to Angela darting your eyes at the two blonde guys.
Shayne was the first to confess. “We're just curious. Plus, I'm obligated to tell Court every gossip that I hear.” The bitch did not even try to deny it. “How can you tell we were talking about that?”
“Screw that, the real question is who was it?” Angela said, giving you her wide eyes. The rest of them did too, waiting for your responce.
“Can we please not talk about who I like. Especially during work hours.” You mumbled as you aggressively rubbed your palms to your face.
“Wait, so this is ongoing? Not in the past? Recent.” Angela retorted. You replied with a little groan, sinking yourself deeper into your seat. “Fine, don't tell us. We will find out anyway.”
“Honestly, I don't care.” You said standing up. “Angela, you don't even know where you last placed your glasses. I doubt you can focus on finding out who I like.”
Just as you blurted that out you regretted it. Angela is a forgetful person, the type to get distracted by one thing by another. However, she's also very competitive. You challenging her and made her more passionate about finding out.
Every interaction with other co-workers seemed to be watched by some of your friends.
How when you and Damien are discussing weekend plans on your desk, Angela and Courtney also happen to be walking by. Slowly. Eyes directed at the two of you.
Or when you are asking Spencer to clear up some rules about 'Blood On The Clocktower', somehow Shayne needs to hear it too.
And even when you are in a private meeting with Ian. You can see them standing by the door like you couldn't see them through the glass door.
“I'm not even gonna ask why.” Ian said, darting his eyes towards the people outside.
“Thank you. Someone who finally is not on my business.” Your ease was short lived.
“Oh, is it about the whole 'crush on the coworker' thing. I heard people talking about it.”
If he knew, there is a high probability that Anthony himself is aware that there is someone in the office you fancy.
Nothing to worry about. It's not like people will notice. The two of you barely interact anyways. Plus, since the return of Anthony up to this day nobody has suspected anything.
“By the way, can you fill in for Arasha on Who Memed It later? 2:00 PM.” You responded with a nod to the last minute project.
As you walk out of his office you acknowledge your so-called friends. “Come on, guys. Can you just let it rest.” You said making the exhaustion visible from your voice.
You saw guilt in their eyes. “Fine. I'm sorry for trying to make you say even though you don't want to.” Trevor said. “You can't just drop the bomb on us and not expect us to wonder.” Angela added.
“I swear to tell you guys when I'm ready. I promise.” You said pulling them to an embrace.
The rest of the day was smooth enough. You, feel more at ease. Before the clock could even strike 2 PM, you are already at the set. The crew helped with your mic and you sat between Courtney and Angela. Few minutes before the filming would start Anthony entered and sat alongside other crew.
You didn't expect his presence. for the entirety of the day this is the first time you are seeing him so you assumed he is out for the whole day.
Your breath hitched as he made his way towards your panel. “Hey, good luck later. I know you guys will do great.” Bailey called out that cameras are about to start rolling. “My money is on you.” He said winking and pointing his finger to you.
God. That made your heart stop beating for a while. The word “Rolling!” made it start pumping again.
The video started the way that it would usually go. Shayne did his usual intro and the game started with added jokes from here and there.
“Next meme.” He read the meme out loud.
“–was it A. Trevor, B. Alex Tran from games, C. Spencer who is also from games, or is it D. Anthony?”
“This is hard,” You exhaled a little. “and also, true.” You said recognizing the authenticity of the meme. “Which one is it and how dare he?”
The crew laughed behind the camera.
“This could also be a secret Shayne.” Courtney added.
Shayne then pointed at you to go first. “Although Trevor loves laughing at my misery I think this is Spencer.”
Angela went next. “I feel like Alex Tran experiences this more with you so I chose him.”
“I chose Trev because if he will submit a meme it would be making fun of you.” Court said as they flip their board to face the cameras.
“Let's find out. Who memed it?” All eyes darted towards the television. Then it revealed the answer. “It's Anthony.”
Your mouth gaped. “What?” Your eyes darted to the man sitting on the crowd of the crew. Even though he wasn't wearing anything special you noticed how he stood out among others. How everyone is just a blur around him.
He locked eyes with you and smiled apologetically from his scheme. “I saw this cat and I thought about you. Everytime you feel overwhelmed you would put your hand on your face or on your mouth and your eyes would gloss.”
You’re unsure whether to feel flattered or utterly embarrassed. On one hand, there's something undeniably warm about the way he notices your odd quirks you thought no one paid attention to. And that makes your heart stir, because you like him. But at the same time, there’s a flush of self-consciousness creeping up your neck. Is he laughing with you, or at you? Is this teasing something, or just a playful joke? You can’t quite tell. You're flattered because you matter enough to be the subject of his jokes. You feel exposed as he sees right at the parts of you you’ve never quite known how to hide.
The rest of the video you are out of your mind. After the video cut Courtney nudged you. “Hey, are you ok?” You responded with a classic 'Why wouldn't I be?' “It feels like you've been out of it since Anthony's meme.” Then it struck them. “Holy fuck, it's him!” You begged them to not tell anyone. And they promised not to.
You got home and you feel exhausted. You always feel that way but this time there is an added weight. As much as you wanted to stop feeding into your delusions, you can't help but think if there is a hidden meaning behind it. As if there is a code designed for you to crack. But you reminded yourself that it's part of the job. Every crew and non participating cast are asked to submit. He probably did it just to comply and participate.
Just as your mind was in a whirlwind you received a message that will just add to the boiling confusion you are currently enduring.
Anthony P.
Hey, I just wanted to check up on you.
I hope the joke wasn't too mean :)
What now? Your mind is filled with lots of words but somehow none of them coherent. His text is laid plain and simple, yet you fully could not comprehend it.
You
Don't worry about it!
It was true anyway.
That's the only logical thing that you could squeeze out of the wreck you call your brain. Just as you hit send your hand flew to your mouth, a habit you do whenever you feel anxious. Exactly like the meme. Fuck. But you couldn't help it. Waiting for his response was torture.
Anthony P.
It wasn't my intention to mock you.
I just thought it's a cute habit that you do.
When I saw that cat meme I instantly thought about you.
What the fuck. The fast beating of your heart echoed like a drum. So fast that it shook even your hardest bones.
Anthony is one of the nicest people you have ever met. Yet, part of your mind is telling you that he is playing some sick game. Or that he really looks out for you as an employee. Anything. You are thinking of any reason because your entire being is rejecting to believe that he is doing this because he admires you the way you do to him.
Your thoughts have gotten the best of you. You don't know how long you sat there. Looking at his message, overanalyzing it. Trying to process it. What snapped you out was his follow up message asking if you are still there.
Anthony P.
You are probably tired.
I'll just give you something tomorrow.
See you.
Well, fuck. You fell asleep wondering what tomorrow will bring.
Just as you entered Courtney cornered you. “Hey, let me show you something.” they pulled out their phone and started playing a video edit. It was a compilation of clips of you and Anthony taken from the YouTube videos. “You guys are so cute.”
“Did you edit this? ” Instead of answering they just showed a scheming smile. “Because if this was a real fan edit I would have probably seen it by now.”
“I wish you guys would appear on more videos together so I can make more.” Courtney said humorously. “Or I could use the same 5 clips, people on Tiktok do that. Oh my God, I should post this on Tiktok so that other people would start shipping you two.”
“Court, nobody would do that. I think people only ever ship him with Ian. And I am no Ian Hecox.” Just as you said his name, Ian popped out of nowhere.
“What about Ian Hecox?” He looked at the two of you with a cottage cheese and spoon on his hand. Before either of you could reply he said “By the way, Anthony has been asking if you have arrived yet. Whatever that is about.” then he walked out.
Courtney sent you a teasing smile. They pulled you where Anthony would be. Your heart is thumping. You feel like one of these days you'll get a heart attack due to excessive heart beating.
Once you've reached your desk there he was. Like a prince charming waiting for you coffee on hand. Although he was wearing his usual sweaters there is an extra sparkle brought by his charming smile.
It was a scene from a RomCom movie. The dashing bachelor, standing by your desk. “I couldn't stop thinking about the meme the whole night. Like I said, it wasn't to mock you.” He then handed you the coffee carrier. “Again, I'm sorry.”
“Wow, Anthony, you didn't have to.” Is this a wet dream? “Seriously, I was never offended. I get that it's part of the job. Plus, I can never be mad at you.” You caught yourself staring at him longingly. “Considering that you're my boss.”
“A thank you would have been appreciated.” He said his expression is engulfed with pretend offense.
“Right, thank you so much Anthony.” Your eyes looked down at the coffee for a short second. “Unnecessary, but deeply appreciated.”
He gave you every smile lines his cheeks could provide. “You're welcome, little gem.” He then left to do work.
As soon as he left, people surrounded you. They asked what just happened. You tried to say that it was an apology gift. Nothing more.
You sat on your office chair thinking. You have been doing a lot of thinking these past few days yet your kind is still a messy blur. One thing is for sure. Some of your friends have figured out your secret infatuation with your boss.
The progression of your relationship was so fast these past few days that you learned more about him compared to years of working with him.
The morning coffee became daily. His schedule is a little earlier than yours. So by the time you get to work the coffee is on your desk, lukewarm, and with a note. You caught yourself going to the office a little earlier to talk to him more about nothing specific. Work, life, pets, schedule, it doesn't matter. It was as if you could talk to him about everything.
You dread the words “I won't keep you from work anymore.” or “I'll see you around.“
One day there was a shift. Instead of his usual farewell, he said “You know, I really enjoy talking to you. We should do it outside of work too.”
What? “Like a date?” you blurted out of shock.
“If you want it to be.” He said with his high pitched laugh. And he left. He just left with a “See you later.”
You wanted more input from him. Does he mean talk outside of work like hangout or is it more of a romantic way of getting to know each other.
Instead of asking him what he really means you asked the next best thing. Your friends. Your friends who have slowly, one by one, figured out your affection for your boss.
After telling them they are blown away. “I just found out that you like him. Now you two are dating?” Trevor said surprised.
“I don't even know if he considers that a date. I am as clueless as you guys are.” You said with hints of frustration on your voice. “Plus, after work? I look like a mess.”
“How are you not sure if it is a romantic way. Is it 'see you later' or 'see you later'?” Angela asked the first one with a high pitch and wide smile and a smug and wink for the second.
“I don't know. Neither?” and they hit you with a “you don't know?” was their response.
“It doesn't matter. You'll find out when you get there and you will tell us every detail.” Courtney said attempting to provide comfort. “Plus you always look good. You don't need to prepare more.” This time you can hear the sincerity in their voice.
“Maybe she needs a little chapstick and a hair brush.” Angela said and immediately followed up with “I'm kidding!”
“She won't be needing chapsticks if tonight goes well, if you know what I mean.” Chance said darting you a teasing smile.
Their words brought you calm support for a while. You managed to distract yourself with work and your friends. You tried to drown out the noise of what's about to come as it attempt cloud your mind.
You forced yourself to stop looking at the clock and for your eyes to never leave the PC monitor. You were typing when you felt a small tap on your shoulder.
“Hey, are you still not done?” Anthony asked. You were taken aback by him. You also looked around the office only to notice that most people have already left. “The other cast left a few minutes ago. Are you ready for that hang out you promised me?”
You gave him a yes as loud as a whisper. You saved what you are working on to drafts, not daring to finish it. Your fingers tapped on the keyboard with a twitch. As the screen turned black your eyes darted to him. He was staring at you with a longing look. “All done?” you nodded.
You stood from your desk carrying your purse and laptop bag. He took that from your hand. He then also opened the passenger seat door for you. Even in the restaurant, he pulled out your chair and tucked it for you.
You were caught off guard by his chivalrous demeanor, but somehow not surprised. He has shown this side of him to you before may it be through his endearing words or sweet mannerisms.
You looked around the restaurant he took you in a restaurant with beautiful scenery. Expensive looking too. If he asked you to split the bill you will be obligated to sell your car as a down payment.
“Anthony, this looks too much.” You said, looking him in the eye for the first time since entering.
“Well, if you weren't worth this much I wouldn't have brought you here.” He humored you. You wondered how he was able to get a table for a restaurant this extravagant for a short notice. “Well I called them up after I left your desk. I told them that I finally had the courage to ask the girl I've been talking to on a date, please give us a table because she really deserves this.” You looked at him with one eyebrow raised to his surreal story. “I'm fucking with you. I know the owner, asked for favors. But that story is less romantic so I decided to make a new one.” This earned him a genuine laugh from you.
He loves when got to make you do that. It felt like a siren singing, and him doing anything just to hear it over and over again.
His admiring gaze was cut off when you questioned his statement. “So this is a date. Like a romantic date?”
“What? Was that not established? We have been talking for a few days I thought...” He trailed off not daring to finish the sentence.
You have somewhat shifted the mood. “I mean..” you are lost in words. “I didn't really consider us as talking, you know?”
“Oh, so you didn't know that I wanted to go on a date with you? Or that I like you?” He looked down for a second, the sound of his voice turning sour. “I thought it was mutual.”
“I didn't know it was a date.” You took this opportunity to place your hand above his. “But I hoped it would be.” Your eyes intertwined like your fingers did. “I've liked you since the moment my eyes first landed on you. I just never imagined that you too would feel something for me someday.”
He caressed your cheek with his other hand. No words were spoken, but both your eyes are speaking. Having an understanding beyond the comprehension of your minds.
Throughout the dinner the conversation went smoother, sweeter, more delightful.
Even though the two of you are now on the same page, you can't help but thank all the stars that made your wildest dream come true.
A/N if you guys have any requests feel free to tell me :>>
summary: you can't escape something you are not ready to let go. falling back to the past might sound tempting. are you willing to risk all the effort of moving on?
your father was a jealous man. that's a trait you took up from him. this constant feeling of his led to you growing up in a household where parents shout angrily at one another as a form of communication. this led to a childhood you crying in your room drowning yourself in pillows to muffle harsh words and the sound of breaking housewares. you realized that expressing jealousy would lead to the chaos you escaped. hence you vowed to never be like that.
when you accidentally ran into his ex while you two are on your dinner date, you suppressed. even though you saw how much they clicked like no time has passed, sharing inside jokes and talking about memories you forced out a smile and nod. even though they are lost in their nostalgia giving you a hard time focusing on the conversation while forcing your tears to not stream down.
once she left he noticed that look on your face and the way you are fiddling with your necklace. he took your hand and stared right into your eyes. “i love you, you know that right?” right. his words assured you.
the breaking point was his mother's birthday party. this was the first time you are meeting his family so you went above and beyond to make a good first impression. you bought a bottle of wine, carefully chose a scented candle and a pot of beautiful flowers.
although spencer has already told you that you don't have to try so hard because he just knows they'll love you, you wanted to be good
he opened the door and let you in, as he shouted calling for the attention of people in the house. his mom ran to hug him as you stood back he introduced you as his girlfriend and everyone introduced themselves to you.
like a romcom move, just as you handed his mother the gifts you heard a knock from the door frame. the figure of his ex appeared and you felt everyone lit up. they all rushed to the door to greet her. you looked at spencer who was standing beside you. “you didn't mention, she would be here.” you stated, not trying to sound mean. he told you that he was as clueless as you are.
you don't really remember much about that night. just like the scene at the restaurant, the dinner table was filled with nostalgia. how much she was like a family to them. from time to time his mother would ask you something like “what was your childhood like.” and you'd answer “well i was a loner growing up. i was an only child and both my parents were really busy people so i am not really skilled with socializing.” you said. she then replied with “oh spencer was too!” you smiled thinking that finally, for once you will actually be part of the conversation. “thank god she befriended him when they were in sophomore year.” there it is.
after hearing those words, you just dissociated. you are looking at them but somehow you cannot hear their words.
you are trying to regulate your emotions and feelings. maybe you're being too selfish. not every conversation should involve you. this night is not about you.
there it is again. the jealousy. the way everyone fawned over her. how his mom asks how has her life been and what keeps her busy and you wishing you were at her place. instead you are on your chair counting the remaining peas on your plate.
once the dinner was over spencer's father asked for his help and you volunteered to help with the dishes next to his mom. maybe just maybe, you can finally bond.
you started with the small talk like how the dinner was great and how lovely the house was decorated and it worked. you actually had a flowing conversation with her.
you realized that, maybe you weren't trying as hard earlier and that she too wanted to get to know you.
the topic of marriage came up you said that you and spencer have not yet talked about it or any plans of doing so anytime soon. that is when she dropped the bomb. “oh just you wait. he proposed to her in senior year college. one year after they started officially dating.” oh.
you did not know how to respond. suppress. suppress. suppress.
on the drive home you were quiet. you felt everything and empty at the same time. once near you asked “can you drop me off on my apartment?” you are just staring right ahead, unable to show any expression.
“wait, i thought you were gonna stay over at mine tonight? you know cuddles and debrief.” he said, trying to lift the intense mood of the car.
“i need to think, spencer. i don't trust myself with words right now. not when you're around. just let me think, ok?” you said as you fiddled with the chain on your neck, clinging to it like it's your sanity.
he did not question it further. he knows about your environment growing up. if you're visibly upset it's best to just leave you alone because he does not want you to scream or even raise your voice. he does not want you to become the person you are afraid of.
once he reached your building, she uttered a quiet thank you, no bye, no i love you. she just left. he was thinking of all the things that could have made you upset for the night.
spencer is not stupid. he knows his ex being there bothered you so much. he tried to show his support for you throughout the whole dinner by being by your side and holding your hand and thigh. also, by bringing up what you do best in front of his parents.
the day after, you cannot be contacted by him. his messages are unread, calls are missed, and voice memos are unplayed. he could not resist it anymore so at night during that very day he went to your apartment. he knocked at your door, and you opened it.
“spencer, please not today.” you said, voice raspy and eyes swollen. but he pushed to get in.
“no, please, i've been waiting for your replies but you've been giving me this silent treatment. please baby, just tell me ok. let's talk about it.” he said cupping your face and wiping the strays of hair covering your face.
“i can't do this anymore spencer.” you said looking at him in the eye. “i tried not to think too much about you and her. believe me i tried to not be bothered by the two of you. by your shared memories and the fact that you proposed to her.” you were at a panicking state.
that caught spencer off guard. “baby, that's all before you ok. we're done. i only love you now. only you.” he stated practically groveling as an attempt to soothe you.
“i can't live up to her, spence. how much your family adores her. i fucking hate myself. no matter how much assurance you give me it will never be enough spencer. i tried to believe you, to trust you because i know you are telling the truth but, it doesn't go away spencer it's all engraved in my fucking brain.”
“just talk to me. i can't lose you. we will figure it out with each other.” you can see the pain in his eyes. his pupils are like arrows piercing through your chest.
“i need serious help, spence. i know that i will just hurt you if we continue this.”
his love could not save you.
it took you months of healing.
the night after he drove home took an unexpected turn. when you woke up you caught him staring at you. when he realized that you woke up he scrambled to look natural.
“why didn't you wake me up? god, this is embarrassing.” you stated, still feeling groggy as you just woke up.
“we actually just stopped. i was about to wake you, but you already did.” he explained. you know damn well that he was lying. when you two were still together, you've caught spencer just staring at you. whether you guys are playing videogames you try so hard to understand or it's the middle of the night and he's unable to sleep.
“do you want to come inside?” you asked politely. maybe, this can serve as a closure, you thought.
spencer was caught off guard. “are you sure?” he asked hesitantly.
“spence you went beyond your way just to drive me home. i insist. plus, i think you left some kickstart in my fridge.” you added trying to lighten up the mood.
once inside you took out his remaining stash of mountain dew kickstart from your fridge. “wow, you just kept these around for so long? it's like you're expecting me to be back.”
“no, it's just absolute garbage i couldn't get myself to drink it.” you said as you jokingly nudged his shoulder. “my therapist told me to stop torturing myself.”
“you've been good i assume? i mean after that night you kind of shut the world out. now you're you again.” he said. “mom has been asking for you, she thought you were really cool. i don't have the heart to tell her we broke up.”
“spencer,”
“i'll tell her soon, it's been a while since i introduced them to a girlfriend and i can't just tell we broke up the night after the dinner.” he said. although there is a pang in his words he was trying to make it sound humorous. you totally understood him.
you really liked spencer. you still do. hence, inviting him over was probably a bad idea. you could not trust yourself when you're next to him. the break up was not something you wanted but something you desperately needed.
the night went by fast, the two of you were talking like no time had passed, no falling out ever happened. the closure spiel that you have constructed in your mind sounds pathetic now when all you wanted to do was lean forward and kiss the lips of the man before you.
“i don't think i ever stopped loving you.” spencer blurted out. “that whole 3 months of our break, i could never stop thinking about you. at work, all i do is stare at you and ask our friends if you've been doing well.”
the temptations are killing you. you really wanted to give in and just let it all fall back to the way you guys were. before the break, before the jealousy.
he took a step closer to you. “i am not going to force you to be with me again. but please, look me in the eye and tell me you've moved on from me. from us.”
“i can't.” you said, involuntarily. he took that opportunity to lean closer and like a magnet you did too. you closed the gap that the two of you have been suffering from for the last 3 months.
the kiss was passionate, tender and sweet. it felt like neither of you wanted to let go of one another. as the two of you parted lips you spoke.
“spence, can we take it slow. i know that i am better now mentally but i don't think i am fully healed.” you sat at one of the stools of your kitchen island. “i don't want to hurt you and myself in the process.”
“i understand. i'll wait for you to be comfortable again.” he stated kissing you once more.
y/n is dead | funeral roast
smosh ✓
26.8M subscribers
1.3M views 13 hours ago
usernam99
no FUCKING way
↓25 more replies
username51
this is what my parents divorce talk felt like.
↓15 replies
username6
we got (shipname) content we asked for but at what cost?
→ username82
right? the only time they addressed that (shipname) was real when they were already broken up.
→ username03
maybe if we all close our eyes and pray really hard they'll get back together?
username360
it's like the shourtney announcement all over again.
↓25 replies
username15
the thumbnail being (shipname)😲
spencer calling her his ex lover 😫
↓16 replies
username006
at 21:06 “y/n looked as beautiful as ever till the day she left us” oh come on just get back together.
→ username121
he also said that she has communication issues, but we won't talk about that.
→ username33
she said that spence does not have common sense, i felt that.
↓view more
username65
roasting my ex is not the closure i want but the closure i NEED.
→ username1
right? the urge to hold a funeral for exes
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username12
not my business but i really want to know why they broke up.
to the current time the people went crazy. the video was trending, people are ragging in the comment section, clips are being posted in tiktok, and edits are being made.
by the time the video was posted you guys have reconciled. but still somehow distant.
“you guys are crazy. we passed 1 million views in less than 12 hours and you and him are getting clipped on tiktok and twitter.” angela beamed. “and the ship edits? don't even get me started with those. there are too many in tiktok.”
“i saw, you literally reposted all of them.” you said laughing off her excitement. you didn't really realize how much supporters your ship with spencer had.
it's a shame that they found out when it was already over,
summary: when the ghost of the past comes to haunt you no prayer can make it go away, especially when he is your coworker and the fans have been asking for you two.
although there had been speculations about you and spencer's relationship neither of you have confirmed or even entertained the topic to the viewers.
hence, when the split happened you only had to explain it to trusted people.
the workload of being a full-time cast member and producer kept your mind from thinking much about the break up. however, having to see him everytime you turn your head did not help.
during the smosh games videos there was a noticeable distance between the two of you. from the past videos, it was no brainer that you both would sit next to each other bantering with one another or spencer helping you cheat. but this time, you sat next to chance and arasha instead. you tried so hard to be bubbly, energetic and humorist but the discomfort was noticeable. arasha offered her hand to give you some sort of comfort. you gave it a little squeeze to show your gratitude.
from time to time, you and spencer would lock eye contact and would immediately dart your eyes apart from one another. you can't deny that there is a burning urge inside you that wants to joke with him, or at the very least utter a word that's directed towards him. he too hoped for that. he wished that you would acknowledge this presence and that you would not just disassociate whenever the topic is directed to him.
as much as you are enjoying the games you are dreading for the video to be over so that you can go back to you desk and pretend he doesn't exist.
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username9
you can see how much less chaotic they are when angela is not around😭
↓ 15 replies
username001
are we not gonna address how distant y/n and spencer are?
→ username123
so i am not going insane, you guys are seeing what i am seeing.
→ username08
them not sitting next to each other is super sus
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username888
at 19:54 when everyone was taking turns dissing spencer she just looks down? please this is worse than my mom and dads divorce.
↓ 22 replies
username15
you guys, they are all friends you can see in her eyes that she's simply not feeling well. i'm sure it's not personal.
→ username143
me when i try to play stupid:
↓ 35 replies
username51
call me when they are ok again
↓ 10 replies
the atmosphere in the office never seems to thicken more as time passes. you thought that by now you both would have been over it and be back to being friends once again.
after that video was posted the directors decided that it was best to not put you two in the same video, not until the tension was figured out.
the fans have noticed and are protesting to bring the both of you back to the same screen at the same time. this was brought up on the idea briefing subtly.
"so i was thinking, it's about time we hold a funeral roast for y/n." courtney suggested. "also here, we can finally add spencer since they have been asking for you guys in the same video." after she left those words you felt the eyes on you.
"i don't know, court. you know what it's like between us. it's probably not a good idea for me to roast her." spencer butted in from the other side of the conference room. everyone in the room seemed to agree.
"guys, i don't mind. i'll be dead anyway." you said humorously but with a dry laugh. to be honest you really don't want it to happen but causing this much inconvenience to the company just made you feel so bad.
after your confirmation the meeting went on like it usually does and by the end of it everyone started to leave one by one. you on the other hand are trying to clear your notes jotted down from the meeting. as you were caught up with what you are doing the presence in front of you caught your attention.
as you darted your eyes to him you caught a short glimpse of the look he had been giving whilst you write. the two of you were stuck there for a secret before he broke the silence.
"you don't have to do it you know. they will totally understand." he said with pure concern. he knows you too well. the discomfort you've successfully hidden for your other coworkers to see can be sensed by spencer.
"really, spencer. it's no big deal. i can handle a roast, you know that." you said trying to not make the conversation awkward. "plus, when we ended things we swore it will be like before, back when we were just colleagues. i'm sorry that i've been avoiding you or the topic for the last few weeks."
the truth is when he's around you feel like exploding. when you both lock eyes you have to fight the urge of taking back the break-up and ask him to get back with you. but, you know standing firm with your decision is the right thing to do so the only way you can control yourself is by completely avoiding him even though all you wanted to do was jump into his arms.
"ok so, i'll just show you the roast i'd come up with so i wouldn't step on any boundaries." he said hesitantly. there he is. the version of spencer you've grown to miss. his gentleness and sincerity.
"you don't have to do that, spence." you closed your notepad and looked him in the eye. "i trust you." a mistake. the moment their eyes met once more there was something electric about it. something magnetic. something that's making you regret every choice you have ever made.
she stood because she knows damn well she can't trust herself around him. especially, now that there are only the two of them in the room. just like that she's gone before he could even bid her good-bye.
the moment for the funeral roast cameand everyone's jokes made you let out a small giggle. some of them are quite harsh but nothing you could not handle.
when it was time for spencer to speak you felt stiff. like you couldn't move, like you're actually dead.
"hi, i'm spencer. most you probably did not know this but, she used to be my lover." the crowd erupted in overly exaggerated gasps. "as a former partner slash coworker i've noticed how good she is at multitasking– like how she juggled causing me constant headache and being at disassociated in every meeting at the same time. " although spencer was hesitant with dissing you the moment he saw your checks and lips genuinely twitch upwards. he felt a relief and a sign for him to continue. "it’s wild working next to you every day… reminds me of all the good times, and also why i keep antacids in my drawer.
"they say that after break-up you realize how your ex really isn't all that." this comment turned your lips into an o shape. "y/n looked as beautiful as ever 'til the day that she left us. too bad, looks can't fix communication issues." the crowd laughed and clapped and so did you.
after that you had to pretend to be possessed for your comeback everyone laughed at the jokes but the moment you have been dreading for is now happening. when it was finally spencer's turn you noticed how nobody said anything. it was as if everyone wants to hear whatever you want to say very clearly.
"to spencer, i would like to thank you. our relationship taught me so much. it taught me patience, humility and how to pretend to care about stupid videogames." the crowd bursted in fits of laughter. angela is being held by amanda and chance so that she would not fall, shayne stood up with his hand on the sides of his head, even ian broke character as he was playing my mother.
"i must say, spencer is someone who's really hard to forget. i mean i have to see him everytime i look up my laptop. but, therapy helps though." your eyes caught his, he was carrying his admiring like eyes that has all it's attention towards you. "but to end it all, i must admit that spencer never failed to make me feel special." a genuine smile crept his face. "it was as if common sense is not for everyone." the crowd of your funeral erupted in laughter and claps.
right after the cut everyone dispersed out of the set, some still laughing and bringing up jokes mentioned earlier.
after work the exhaustion struck you like a whip. also the fact that you have to commute on your way home added since chance forgot to inform you earlier that he will take an early out for the day. so now you're stuck at the entrance of the smosh building placing an uber.
like a real rom-com scene, spencer stopped infront of you. "i'll take you home. please let me." he said with his pleading eyes that he knows damn well you have a hard time saying no to. after the roast earlier that day you felt like you can finally be comfortable with him again so instead of denying his request you hopped in.
there was an awkward silence in the car and you both are dying to disrupt it. "thank you for this spencer. you really didn't have to."
there was a long silence after that interaction. this time it didn't feel heavy. it felt light and comfortable. that's probably why you fell asleep as he drove you home.
a few minutes have passed since the car reached your home. spencer couldn't get himself to wake you. so instead he just stared. even though there are strays of hair on your face, it could not hide your beauty from spencer's eyes. it's probably because you face have been long engraved in his mind.
