Lil Intro *ੈ✩‧₊˚ My name's Ife! ִ ࣪𖤐 20 ִ ࣪𖤐 He/She ִ ࣪𖤐 Nigerian ִ ࣪𖤐 Queer ࣪𖤐 Artist
This is basically a Xavier and Sylus fan page lol😭
Xavier and Sylus main if you couldn't guess by now
I yap about Xavier and Sylus because I became obsessed with LADS earlier last year and ever since maining these two, decided to make this blog since I wanted to talk into the void about their lore and what I love about them ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡)
I post analysis' on cards and lore, reblog other posts, my opinion on the game, its content and characters in general, and occasional art when I feel like it.
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚
As much as I main both Sylus and Xavier, I post a lot more about Xavier because he's my first main. I didn't see a lot of Xavier mains or centered content when I first started getting into the fandom, so I kinda decided to be the content I wanna see while having fun with this account ( •⌄• )✧
I'm kinda bad at asks, but feel free to still use it, I'll eventually see it and answer when I feel warranted!
I love having discussions about the game, but always keep it respectful!
ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚
Thank you for visiting my page and hope you have fun sifting through my crazy shit of a blog😚
🐦⬛ some random sylus ramblings idk its 5am please take this offering im going a little bit insane about him
thinking about feeling sylus's skin through his shirt.., the warmth and power there still tangible beneath the fabric. small intimacies like that are important to meee,,
running your hand down his clothed back, then sneaking it underneath his shirt and feeling his bare skin beneath your palm. so soft with just a bit of give to it. feeling his muscles flex under your fingers as he moves to thread his own through your hair in return. i just want to touch him so bad i might cry. Tbh..
you express interest in touching him intimately for the first time, and you receive a flirty, cocky response in return, but are also given full access. sylus is taken by surprise when instead of reciprocating his heated words, you press your cheek against his chest, over his heart, and run your hands up his sides beneath his shirt, your eyes closed in quiet focus. you treat him as a delicate treasure to be worshipped and revered and valued in a way he's never properly experienced before. he'd soften so sweetly and hold you close, enveloping you in his larger form and pressing a kiss to your temple. enjoying the feeling of your small hands exploring their new territory.
feeling his hand gently pressing against the small of your back when you get distracted in public, guiding you.
holding his hand to avoid being separated in a crowd, then keeping them like that even as you leave the crowded location. playfully swinging your joined hands a little bit and enjoying his amused response.
going to a concert with him and letting him cover your ears when the music gets a little too loud for you. the size of his hands compared to your head making you flush a little bit.
he always runs warmer than you, so you tend to lean into his touch whenever he offers it. he finds this adorable, and sometimes likes to see how far you'll lean when you're too tired to realize he's messing with you. eventually your sleepy protests win him over, and he wraps you back up in his embrace and gives you all the kisses you want.
chasing traces of his scent on your clothing when you miss him. curling around his pillow while he's gone, and eventually feeling the mattress dip behind you while you're half asleep, warm hands pulling you backwards until your back rests against against his warm chest. ticklish little kisses are pressed to your neck as he wraps his long arms around you to hold you close. trying not to cry when you tell him that you missed him, and feeling his heart stutter against your back when your voice cracks.
Wait I've been thinking–someone once posted about Xavier wanting MC to like just Xavier right??
Ohhh how i wish to hear about Xavier and his countless identities..about the Xavier who lived on earth, faked his own death, began life in a
But anyways, it got me thinking more in detail about his identities. Throughout his times on Earth, Xavier has had to make so many personalities for himself and create so many versions of himself just to make himself seem like a normal person. Btw this is so hard for me to put into words so bear with me here 😭.
But it's a well known fact among most Xavier girlies that he himself has probably had a few identity crises, and I just want to build up on this idea. Xavier himself doesn't view his other versions as him. He sees them as completely different.
Xavier: Whilst Lumiere is kind and gentle, I'm apparently harsh and cruel?
He doesn't see his other version as him, they're other people who he associates with, but nothing further. They're different personalities of him.
Xavier: And when you see Lumiere, you appear to be a lot happier than when you see me.
This just proves that even if the fandom sees Lumiere and Xavier as the same person (thus the jealous Xavier joke) he doesn't think Lumiere is him. Lumiere is a completely different person than Xavier, and that is why Xavier finds it so easy to get jealous over Lumiere.
But my main point isn't that–It's the fact that the Xavier we see might not even be the real Xavier (or in other words, is a personality made to protect his real self/a mesh of his dozens of other selves). Going back to Xavier's comment about Lumiere, it proves that Xavier can have different personalities, supported by the fact MC mentioned him to be a good actor. (Can't remember the exact line). He's familiar with this, my earlier words about us not seeing his real self was a joke btw. We see his real personality because you can compare him with Lightseeker (Pre time travel) and see that they are the same. But it just got me thinking about what-ifs. Xavier can create himself many personalities, the reason he's good at acting is because he becomes his other selves. So in other words, he becomes them, but they aren't him. Xavier can become one of his other personalities, but he will never see himself as them. And if we weren't MC, then we probably would have had to face one of his various other selves rather than the actual self he hides behind dozens of other personalities. And it shows, after a whole year, Xavier is finally showing us his true personality, and we're getting to see more actual sides of him than any mysterious fakes. And Xavier likes that this is happening. Whilst MC also has her reincarnations and versions, Xavier has his own personalities and identities. Supported by Xavier's line in the 21 days memory.
Xavier: Every version of me belongs to you, and every version of you, belongs to me.
So yeah in a sense MC and Xavier are kindred spirits. And whilst Xavier may not reincarnate or resurrect, he does live through lives and personalities. It makes him both difficult and easy to characterise.
God I think this went off the rails, and if you've read through, thanks. This is my rant for Xavier whom I love with all my life and soul. And sorry if this ended up offending anyone, or confusing anyone, or if I actually was wrong all the way. I'm human, and can make mistakes, please rather than arguing, just tell me my mistake so I can correct myself!
You hit the nail on the head, in my opinion.
I know this was posted in February before we got the spicy banner but just putting that in perspective now,
"I want you to see me unguarded, and exposed."
Xavier really likes that she's becoming the one person he doesn't have to mask around, he really is just and only himself around her - I think he always has been, even if she had to chip away at it.
I mentally berate MC sometimes when she doesn't press for answers, when she tells us that she'll wait for another time. Because me? I want to peel him back like an onion. But maybe I'm grateful she's more patient than I 😆 because this slow careful layer peeling has revealed so much depth inside him.
On one hand I think he does see those versions as separate, but nowadays I think through her he's able to discover and accept those parts as pieces of him too. She's reassuring him constantly in exactly the way he needs. To me he's been even more eager to show her all those pieces now. His favorite spots, his old friends, his old hobbies. We're seeing it more and more. I think if he really, truly continued to see them as separate he wouldn't, but thanks to her it's less "That was a different me" and more "You know what? I did kinda really like photography back then..."
And may I add that these versions of himself are mainly projections of the roles he feels he needs to play for the sake of others and that's why he doesn't feel connected to them?
Like with Lumiere, from what we can concur from what we know, he put on that persona only after to cronorific catastrophie as he was the only person at the time to be seen as the key to defeating them, so taking on the role of Lumiere was for the safety of everyone else and not himself.
And Lumiere became an idealized version of himself that is seen as this hero who is perfect, so that isn't truly a representation of who Xavier is: A man who is flawed and doesn't necessarily care to be a hero or idealized.
And even his role as the leader of the backtrackers was not for his sake, but for the sake of Philos and MC.
He's taken on a leadership and spotlight role because he's been taught that from a young age that is his role and that's who he I suppose to be, but after breaking free from that mindset and realizing that is not what he truly desired, he saw those fronts he puts up for his "others", parts of himself that are not himself and he knows that to bring those walls downs and shatter the illusion to just anyone is not ideal. It would mean possibly being hurt and misunderstood, so he keeps it to himself.
So that's why he's so addament on MC recognizing him for who he is outside of these roles made out of necessity and choose the version of him he himself chose and is the one he sees as his true self without having to ask to be seen and to see a willingness from others to learn and understand him.
It's important and even good that MC recognize him for who be is on the regular whilst also as mentioned before helping him recognize that the other parts and versions of himself do not necessarily have to be separated from who he is on a day to day, but extensions of him that make him whole and no matter the title given to these other versions, he's still just Xavier, even if it may be to a few people, or just MC.
wanna introduce your mc and your LI? ٩(>ᴗ<)و
here's a cute little template you can use! 🌼note: i put two picture slots because lads has some variations that i wanna add |･ω･｀) (blobbu, ancient china, chibis, myths, etc) but you can put whatever in there LOL 🌼note 2: i changed it from yumeship to general ship chart if anyone wanted to use it for their other lads ship (ᵕ ´ ∇ ˋ ˶)
Art credits for the art I used to my lovely mutual @/r0rris_ on insta I commissioned for this!!!
I love this template and lowkey I just ended up yapoing and develop the lore for these two so bare with me😭
I feel like they're those kind of couples who are so on the same wavelength and reflections of one another, it lowkey pissed off and made one dislike the other at first (Iva).
Iva is pretty quiet at first and to themselves for the most part. It reflects in certain past lifes of theirs like the first one with Xavier where it took them a lot of courage to not self isolate and put themselves out there to someone similar to them in their predicament of never feeling free like Xavier.
And in other lives, there's the profound feeling of never feeling like you're truly understood or belong in the place you're said to be in and the person you're told you're supposed to be, yet taking on those roles because you know it's right and an easy script to follow (that's where the non binary beam starts lighting up a bit but doesn't fully hit bc there's no language for them to describe to yet).
And as they get close to Xavier in these lives, they learn to be themselves and shown there's options out there, whilst also having their courage and difference distorted Xavier as well and fall for them over and over.
In the current timeline, Iva is veryyy sceptical of Xavier bc he's aloof as hell and secrative, which irritates them a lot, but as they get to know him more and peal at his layers, they see someone who has a lot of hurt and burden on him that tries to be a perfect image for everyone to feel safe around while not feeling like it's the right fit for which (which they get heavy), so they really start to give him a chance and form a strong connection and sense of care and love for him and are willing to work through the problems they would at first see a drop someone for, but work through because they know it's not of care and love on Xavier's part and not a way to manipulate or harm them.
They're very skilled as partners and are often on the same page on most things. They both like to be careful and think things through, although they can both be enablers sometimes and become reckless lmao.
Iva is calm, but in a chaotic internally screaming kind of way that will show up externally at some point, you just gotta look out for it bc it can be easy to miss as even though they're a ball of stress and anxiety on every possible bad thing, they choose to keep it to themselves in hopes they'll figure it out on their own. Xavier really helps with that because that's kinda him and he finds that carrying the burdens is good for both of them and their anxieties or insecurities over certain topics.
They're a very sweet and "I will always prove and show you that I love you no matter how simple" kind of couple with lots of simple gestures, domestic moments, adventures and being able to meet the other where they're at.
Iva eventually becomes super comfortable with Xavier to the point they can often show just how goofy, outwardly chaotic/awkward, intimate and cool they can be.
Also fun fact, Iva has bad insomnia, so with Xavier's abhorrent sleeping habits, it oddly helped a bit bc even though they don't sleep as often as he does, he sure as hell makes sure they take naps together and sleep as much as their body will allow them.
I should be dead asleep but my brain is still thinking about this post (aside from other things) and I'm just 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I NEED MORE OF THIS FR
💬 1 🔁 3 ❤️ 16 · Now I love spice as much as the next bitch, but do yk what I love even more as I am one projecting ass bitch?
My ace ass
Like my brain just thought about this
Imagine leaning into Xavier, kissing and just full on make out sessh, limbs tangling. But like. That's it. Just the feel of each other, melting into each other's embrace. The warm breath, the heart beats. He's right there, he's real, he's not going anywhere. And most importantly he loves you. The constant reaffirmation of that love that he carried across the centuries. The look in his eyes as you part your lips from his. Resting foreheads against each other. Nose nuzzling, more small pecks on the lips. His cheeks, his nose, his eyelids. Squishing your cheek against his. Just snuggling even closer, not letting any air be between you and him. In that moment there's only the two of you and the love you hold for each other.
Okay idk what I'm on about but I just needed to ramble 😭😭😭😭
Now I love spice as much as the next bitch, but do yk what I love even more as I am one projecting ass bitch?
My ace ass must project onto my mains at all times and I feel like rambling my complex gay thoughts today so.
Like has anyone considered the craving for non-sexual intimacy? Like truly? Walk with me, walk with me.
Bc I think when exploring that, it's easy to dumb it down to oh cuddling, hugging, cute kisses and all the sweet shit when it can be more compicted than that and I think in game, there's instances of that and in fics too, but they can be overhsadowed by seemingly sexual undertones (which isn't bad, but I very much could see a lot of it as non sexual bc to me, some are) and not really given time to marinate in a non sexual context yk?
Because I could very much say I like the idea of XavMC or SylusMC slowly mapping each others bodies in a way that is revearing of the physical body they inhabit and appreciating the soul in which resides in said body and that could be read as sexual. But what if it wasn't? What if it isn't in the context of leading up to sex and it's just that? A deep appreciation for the one you love and being able to express that in a way that sticks.
Bc I have a manyyyy scenarios with both Xavier and Sylus that I often reframe as intimate in a non sexual way.
Xavier for instance, casually recieving soft kisses on his hands as a show of love for the light he brings through his evol and an admiration for the shape and make of it because he has so many things be uses them for, such as fighting for himself and others, takes care of love and the ones he cares for, repairing, expressing his affection etc. with them.
Kissing them as they are the hands of the man who's fought tooth and nail to become who he is today like DAWGGG (I need to stop now before I go on a "Xavier is such a well written and rounded character" tangent). Even in game, I find the fact that resonating with Xavier often times is shown as MCs hand on his chest.
To me, the feeling of his chest beneath your palm and feeling the warmth of his evol resonating and flowing with power is important as a way to be more connected bc in order to even do that, in canon, MC has to like the person they're resonating with to a certain degree and the closer they are, the more powerful the resonance.
I find that to be a small, but powerful form of intimacy that would grow their relationship if you think about it. Even outside of resonating, that same act of a hand on a chest and feeling the warmth and heartbeat of one or the other is close and a show of trust as it can show a sense of holding one's heart with care and importance to the other.
For Sylus, it could be slowly becoming comfortable with Sylus having more physical contact with you on a regular and enjoying specific touches like his hands in your hair and back of your neck, caressing your hips, waist, or arm and enjoying the warmth and safety of his hands bc ik damn well that man is warm as fuck and that would be very relaxing. But also, his tendency to make intense eye contact bc it's one of his ways of affection brings about the feeling of essentially trying to memorize the feeling of each others presence and touch and the moment all in all, like someone SEDATE ME.
And even in the case of initiating said contact, it shows a form of development of not being afraid to ask for the care and needs you want without feeling like it's silly or will be dismissed and your requests for certain boundaries crossed because that's not how Sylus or his relationship with MC operates.
Desire can take many forms and in his lingering lust card, as much as that card was smut, in its own right, Sylus' push to lean into what you truly desire can be put into any other context. I especially liked the part with Graymist and the decision in whether it was truly a desire to kill him. We see Sylus encourage greed and forwardness in many contexts and non sexual intimacy is the same. The desire for certain forms of it no matter how categorized by the masses is not important bc only the way you see and express it is all that matters to him and his indulgence in said desire because to see you satisfied is satisfying to him.
This one was from a fic I read on ao3 called "Half your sky" by starbittenapple, and it was ab a stressed out MC and Xavier trying to find ways to comfort her and yk how it was achieved? Cuddling. Skin on skin contact. Bare chested. WHEN I TELL YOU THAT AWAKENED SOMETHING IN MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY???
You would not believe how much I needed that shit in particular bc the thought of presenting yourself bare to someone you know and trust will just hold you and want to share that closeness and physicality with you without expectation of it leading to literally anything but that warms my heart bc with Xavier it felt so natural and comforting doing so bc even though in this case, him and MC had been mentioned to have had sex before, in my MCs case, even if that isn't the case, the intimacy and development in their relationship is so important bc it only goes based what I permit and allow within that kind of intimacy, again with no expectations of an assumed "main event" to get out of it.
There's a sort of calm that comes with that that I think is very baked into the core of XavMCs relationship.
Now I at some point got briefly introduced to Shibari (Japanese rope bondage) and as much as previously, I did link it as an inherently sexual kink, it doesn't have to be as with most kinks (as ik now😭). Now my introduction to Shibari was def through the sexual aspect of it, but I also looked into the non sexual aspect and ykw? I thought it could relate back to Sylus. Bc ik for a fact he has BDSM themes within his character and relationship to MC and as much and I don't personally care for it, I think some aspects of it and kink are interesting to discuss and bring up in non sexual contexts.
That's kind of a long way to say experimenting with typing up Sylus and being tied up by him in different ways to experience certain sensations and just learn smth new would be nice. Bc when I think about it, it's really all about feeling the sensations of rope, observing and trusting one another, and setting boundaries that work as the act is which performed is very SylusMC. It doesn't have to be sexual or lead to anything sexual, and there can be certain touches and kisses in places permitted and I like the idea of exploring the ways something seemingly sexual could be turned non sexual.
Tbh exploring kink as an ace person is very interesting and ofc I had to make it ab LADS again, but moving on😭
Now have we considered hugs? Ik I basically said it was basic before, however, I feel like we don't get enough hugs in game and shit. Like what about long hugs that are meant to mean holding onto one another and enjoying the feeling of their chest breathing against your own? sharing their warmth? The realisation that the person you've dedicated past lives to is finally in your arms and the life you're sharing with them is real?
I very much remember that one Caleb 4 star that came out where he's hugging MC and seeing a post of someone saying how we need more hug cards and I agree. Kiss cards are nice, however we all need a hug evey now and again (god knows all the lis need that more often ngl)
And speaking of kiss cards, as an affectionate bitch, I love the simple acts of physical closeness and affection and I fear kisses are one of them
I think I've gushed about wanting to squeeze the fuck out of Sylus or Xavier and kiss their faces all over multiple times on this page out of cuteness agression, but also...hear me out...body worship, kissing and make outs perhaps?
Now I may seem like a freak for this but hear me outtttttttt.
I mean this is a very non sexual context I swearrrrr. Have you maybe considered body worship just on its own without it leading to anything else after? Just perhaps bathing together with Xavier and it's just that act of washing one another and maybe, possibly having him resting on your chest in between your thighs while he's slowly caressing your thigh or knee? Hmm? Perhaps also holding hands? Kissing his head, neck, and shoulders? Soft whispers while the steam forms around us until we need to get out? I'm just sayingggggggg.
When I was watching Sylus' lingering lust card in particular yk what got me in particular? That scene in the kindled where MC slides her hand on that man's chest and he holds it there as they're making out now the sensuality of that needs to be studied and I need that frankly.
And Xavier's 21 days card (rip me, I didn't get it and got Zayne) is my fave for a reason bc not only is the story and context fucking fire and a great lead up to the kiss, it's soooooo tender. Like omg you have to rip that kindled from my cold dead hands bc that's the kind of intimacy I'm talking abouttttt.
Like I know I sound fucking crazy saying all this, but I'm being so fr when I say I NEED more explorations and deeper emphasis on different forms of sensuality and non sexual intimacy with the lis bad in game and lowkey in fics too like it's so fun to think about and it can be literally whatever the fuck you want it to be.
Coming from a place where all you're presented as the main and most fulfilling form of physical intimacy is sex and that not applying to you in any way, yet you still desire a romantic connection of sorts that doesn't involve that, it's fun to consider the possibilities and redefining what you do and don't want out of initimacy.
And don't get me wrong, I'm farrrr from not being an enjoyer of sex or anything sexual in the media I consume, however there's my personal limits, comfortability and ways I like seeing it done (which is why I like the spice in game lmao) bc most of the time it's the tension, emotion, contexts and build up that's my main focus and not necessarily the main act ig. That's definitely not everyone's way of engaging in it ace or not, but that's me and I ended up rambling way more than intended about this topic lmao😭
Anyways, I just wanted to get on my mic about my love for this topic and how I like seeing it in LADS specifically at times bc the worms were in fact eating at my brain about this.
