Inceptius

Irish, college student, astrophysics.

[king]

I need more friends please! :) FC: SW-0365-8255-3518

[october-wing]

[simpsons-latino]

[say-prettyy-pleasee]

This is Money Marge. Reblog for a miracle of finances to come to you

🙏🏾💰💵

[filthyprotozoan]

mcr rlly knew what the fuck was up when they said “rebellion’s not a t-shirt you sell, you keep your money and i’ll see you in hell”

[tugoslavija-deactivated20161215]

Goethe-Institut did a web series a while back aimed at new arrivals in Germany and I like how it make sure to teach people that a lot of Germans are rude af

like, this is a genuine scene from an ep:

[involverad]

#Ok but for a second there I was like #this is a bit exaggerated #it’s not that rude to say hi to strangers #just a bit weird #but then I realised #the rude person is probably meant to be the one ignoring the ‘hi' 

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Well she’s obviously doing it wrong. You got to mumble “Guten Tag” in no one’s actual direction upon entering the waiting room. Then you don’t speak a word (you gotta grab a magazine though, because if you’re on your mobile people will find that asocial) until the doctor calls you and when you get back to retrieve your jacket you mumble “Auf Wiedersehen”.

If you say “Guten Tag” while sitting down it’s either because you’re passive-aggressively shaming the person you’re talking to for not saying “Guten Tag” (which is of course highly respectable, but weird if they did say it) or worse: 

You’re trying to make small-talk.

[relyabittooheavily]

See also: when entering a crowded bus, tram, subway or train, you do not say a single word. You look for an empty bench. If there are none, you will have a neighbour. You stop at an empty spot and mumble something like “tschulli-ng” or “s-nch-frei?” to the person occupying the other spot on the bench. You nod in an upward direction. They reply a mumbled “türlich” while vaguely looking somewhere near your face and moving their bag if neccessary. You sit down, nod gratefully, and keep your mouth shut for the rest of the ride. Neither of you wanted this. You wanted freedom. Don’t bother each other.

If an entire bench in front of you becomes available at the next stop, though, it is not the polite thing to free your neighbour and yourself up. No, you stay right where you are. The silent stranger next to you is your silent stranger now.

Welcome to Germany. This is how we express love.

[rohamburger]

None of these people are joking.

[ilikemarthajones]

And if you’re the one sitting at the window and you want to get off at the next stop, you begin to loudly rustle with your bag whatever, because that way you can signal the other person that you need them to get up without having to speak to them.

[kaar-ne]

Clearly, Finns and German were separated at birth because we Finns are exactly the same.

[mannagryn1]

Swedes as well. Talking? Weird shit, tried it once, do not recommend.

[mediocrelanguagelearner]

Germans, Finns and Swedes are the long lost siblings of the Czech Republic. Same rules apply here

[the-collector-ofwords]

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU

[geschiedenis-en-talen]

Same for Belgium but you don’t ask before you sit down in the bus that’s some unnecessary talking there please we don’t do that

[werewolfmonkie]

i found a christian retelling of the first harry potter book and it claims that birthdays are unholy and are made up

[werewolfmonkie]

some highlights

Ron is a Slytherin

Draco is a Ravenclaw AND a mysogonist

Snape isn’t a cunt and is really nice and caring towards Harry

Angels have replaced owls

Dean Thomas is a main character for no reason

Dumbledore isn’t gay and is married to a woman and is ALSO Hermionies dad

It doesn’t take place in the UK for some reason

Wizard duels are now called pray-offs

I’ll add more when i read more

[werewolfmonkie]

more

Harry converts Draco into being a Gryffindor (who are depicted as pitch perfect Christians who follow the bible closely and only take orders from God)

Eco friendly-ness is bad apparently

Voldemort has hair

Believing in evolution is apparently Satanic

Voldemort wanted to make Christianity ILLEGAL

Voldemort ALSO has a Reddit account

Dumbledore calls Reddit a “godless coven”

THEY LITERALLY TRY AND CONVERT VOLDEMORT INTO BEING A CHRISTIAN

Harry says that Voldemort has been tricked by the lies of society and that he deserves to burn in hell 

““I’m just so upset that you don’t accept the Bible,” Hermionie sobbed femininely. “The Bible is the best book ever. Why can’t you respect that?”“

Voldemort is described as a fornicating, drug-addicted evolutionist (Actually, this is what the author says that all Evolutionists are like this)

I can’t believe i found a fic to rival My Immortal

[sleepy-loopin]

This is some anti My Immortal shit

[sorry]

how does one sob femininely? 

[oddpyromaniac]

PLEASE SOMEONE SEND ME A NAME OR A LINK TO THIS

[chaiischii-deactivated20190628]

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1/Hogwarts-School-of-Prayer-and-Miracles

[oddpyromaniac]

I love you thank you

[5000angryspiders]

Dumbledore is married to McGonagall.

There are several paragraphs describing beloved fictional characters’ chest hair.

Slytherins are Catholics.

Petunia wears pant suits.

[bidootdoot-deactivated20190601]

“Aunt Petunia smacked her hands over Harry’s young ears; and her voice was sickly sweet when she said, “Thank you very much for your concern, sir, but he does not need your religion, he has science and socialism and birthdays. “

[sawyer-saucee]

Reblog if you don’t need religion because you have science socialism and birthdays

[chiribomb-deactivated20220820]

Reblog if you’re a fornicating drug-addicted evolutionist

[brainstatic]

Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

[queenrinacat]

English has a lot more words created for very specific phenomena! It’s not just rick-rolling. Language is always evolving and it’s super interesting! Here’s a list of hyper-specific/untranslatable words in English.

[the-star-holder]

My expectations weren’t met, they were exceeded.

[zoyanasyalansky-deactivated2019]

Ariana Grande: “Ain’t got no tears left to cry”

Me, after KoA and QoAaD: bish same

[intergalactic-ashkenazi-deactiv]

can’t focus on a thing

gotta bounce The Leg

[october-wing]

[inceptius]

love it when...

when your boyfriend tells you you look like a tennis ball

@i-put-the-sass-in-assassin

[cheeso]

shower gel label:  immerse your self in this new   “Me Time” luxury   fruity tooty.    abandon all sense of identity and dissolve  Your memories into this   soothing chemical broth    One billion melons are in this tube… use them wisely

[captainbarrabear]

[bunjywunjy]

great news everyone only the Irish are allowed to name new species, effective immediately. 

[jennamourey]

A Full Face of Rhinestones

[lovepsychothefirst]

#listen I don’t watch Jenna Marbles#I’ve never subscribed to hr channel#but there’s one thing about her that I absolutely respect#she does NOT clickbait#she fucking COMMITS to whatever bull shit she says she’s gonna do#90% of her video titles LOOK like clickbait#but then the video is EXACTLY what the title says#how many balloons does it take to life my chihuahua off the ground#I DON’T KNOW JENNA WHY DON’T YOU FIND OUT#spends entire video reporting on increasingly annoyed Party City employees#as she ties over 100 helium balloons to a sling that her dog falls asleep in#while floating 4 feet above the ground#because she fucking found out how many balloons it took#‘MY DOG RATES SOAP’ says the video title#her Italian Greyhound has some kind of soap licking neurosis and shows clear preferences#by the end of the video her dog does indeed have a favorite brand of soap#I EAT DOG TREATS WITH MY DOGS#literally does exactly that and actually enjoys like 2 of them#I don’t follow her at all but DAMN does Jenna Marbles not fuck around#she just … does exactly what she says she will#like some kind of chaotic entity that combats clickbait by being exactly as absurd as the marketing implies

[michaun]

[sprf23]

I love her so much

[kestrel-tree]

Ne forget pas les quatres food groupes mes amis!

[keena-kapu]

@maburito

[maburito]

La pomme d’eau. La pomme de terre. Le pomme de feu. La pomme d’air. Il y a très longtemps ces quatre patates vivaient en harmonie. Mais un jour, la pomme du feu décida de passer à l'attaque.

[anotherlikeyou]

i don’t even fucking speak french but I fucking know what that last comment says

[roxilalonde-deactivated20251105]

showing up late to a meeting with an iced drink is a power move. like with hot drinks the cup is opaque and people cant tell the temperature so they dont know how long ago you got it. maybe its hours old. maybe you just got caught in traffic. who can say. but iced drinks. its clear. they can see the ice. they can see if its still frozen. they look you in the eye and they know you were standing in line fifteen minutes ago and made the conscious, deliberate decision to get a mocha frap instead of being on time. and then you made ANOTHER conscious, deliberate decision to bring it into the meeting with you, informing everyone in attendance that on your list of priorities, each and every one of them ranks firmly below one (1) mocha frappuchino.

[rebel-in-tartan]

THIS IS ME EVERY FUCKING DAY.

[latenights]