Incorrect Great Library Quotes

Things that were absolutely said in the Great Library series. Probably.

[gay-otlc]

Santi: Look, I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like Wolfe a little bit. Zara, holding Santi's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation. Santi: No, that's our joint tombstone. Zara: My mistake.

[solreefs]

and now for the returning classic that no one asked for but me: tech week quotes as tgl characters

Dario: Prakesh can’t fire me directly. she’s sort of like, you know how there’s the greek gods and then there’s the demigods? that’s what she is.

Khalila: what does that make you?

Dario: a satyr. goat legs, music, dancing around with my shirt off, you know.

Jess: …I don’t like this analogy anymore.

-

Morgan: so what actually counts as church clothes?

Wolfe: I don’t think we’re the best people to ask.

-

Khalila, watching Dario practice spotlight cues: good, good, that’s fine- oh, that one was kind of bad.

Dario, after putting the light on the complete opposite side of the stage: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

-

Zara: this cue looks like shit.

Wolfe: you programmed it.

Zara: fuck you.

-

Thomas: don’t bleed on the set! no blood allowed! we don’t have any more paint.

-

Morgan: this is a perfect representation of my state of mind.

Glain: …the wall of balls?

Morgan: no, I forgot my hot glue gun- STOP LAUGHING

-

Santi: no, it’s fine. I can fix the light.

Wolfe: did you just cross yourself?

Santi, already climbing up the scaffolding: don’t worry about it.

-

Santi: NO MEOWING ON THE COMMS

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Ephemera

Well! Hello once again, everyone.

As you've all likely realised, this blog isn't really active - not that I was ever very good at keeping up with it even in its heyday, haha.

That being said, I'm so grateful for everyone who has followed this blog and enjoyed it, for whatever it was worth! And I'm equally grateful to everyone who submitted quotes to me - I apologise for the ones I never got around to publishing.

My brief return is actually in honour of finally finishing the series! It's only taken me roughly 10 years, give or take - about 7 of those spent manning this blog, would you believe! (I think we're currently sitting at about 7 years and 8 months - the blog's anniversary is in October sometime.)

Since I'm unlikely to keep up with this blog properly, and since I'm finally caught up properly, I thought I'd take this moment to reveal my main blog.

So! If anyone out there is still keen on discussing the Great Library, you can find me normally over at @stormstruck-angel. I think a couple of you have followed me over there a while back, and I don't know what it's worth considering I haven't kept up with the fandom if there is one, but you're always welcome in my messages to chat about the Great Library or books in general. :)

Otherwise, I wish you all the best, and I hope you're all doing well! Thanks for sticking around. 💖

Your Humble Librarian

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Santi: Come to dinner tonight. I can’t cook, but I’ll bring plenty of free wine. Wolfe: Marry me.

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Zara: Nic offered me some of his drink because I said I was thirsty.

Zara: I was not expecting to take a sip of vodka cranberry at 9 a.m. 

[thegreatlibraryfangirl]

hiiii <3 I'm pretty new to the fandom (have been reading through all the Great Library fanfics on AO3 skdjhfskdjfh, i'm all_fandoms_reader there) and I present you with: incorrect quotes

Santi: How would you like your coffee? Wolfe: As dark and as bitter as my soul. Santi, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!

Santi: Chris, when someone cries, you need to react. Wolfe: I did. I rolled my eyes.

Santi: We need to distract these guys Wolfe: Leave it to me Wolfe: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Jess, Thomas, and Khalila: *Immediately begin arguing* Glain, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.

Wolfe: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous. Santi: What if it bites me and it dies!? Wolfe: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Nic, learn to listen. Morgan: What if it bites itself and I die? Wolfe: That’s voodoo. Thomas: What if it bites me and someone else dies? Wolfe: That’s correlation, not causation. Jess: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die? Khalila: That’s kinky. Wolfe: Oh my God.

anyway I'm probably not very funny but I like to think I am <3

these are extremely hilarious, thank you!! Also thank you for reading so much on ao3, I've been loving all your comments <3

there is an incorrect quotes blog, I can never tell if it's active or not? @incorrectgreatlibraryquotes

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

10/10 excellent incorrect quotes, MUST reblog

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Thomas: You’re smiling. Did something happen?

Jess: What? Can’t I smile just because I feel like it?

Khalila: Dario tripped and fell down the stairs.

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Glain: What’s the signal for when something goes wrong?

Jess: We yell “Oh shit!”

Glain: …That’ll work.

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

I love the phrase “with all due respect” because it doesn’t actually say how much respect is due. Could be none. Bitch.

Wolfe, almost definitely

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Wolfe: Nic and I are having a child.

Jess: Congratula-

Santi, slamming adoption papers on the table: It’s you, sign here. 

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Dario: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.

Khalila: Wasn’t Jess with you?

Jess: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

[solreefs]

Jess: Captain. It’s a perfectly fine plan.

Santi: No. No, it isn’t.

Jess: You don’t just get to say no.

Santi: This plan involves me! I get to say no. No.

Jess: Capt-

Santi: Let me introduce you to my good friend No.

Jess: Maybe we can compromise.

Santi: No.

Jess: SANTI.

Santi: “No” is a magical word. Here’s how it goes. You say, “Captain, I have an insane, suicidal plan. Would you like to help me carry it out?” And I say, “Why, no.”

[thegreatlibraryfangirl]

Coda:

Wolfe, watching from the doorway: Nic, we're doing Jess' plan.

___

Btw OP there is actually an @incorrectgreatlibraryquotes blog, though I have no idea if they're taking submissions atm.

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

This is SO canon though, I love it

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Glain: Stop it, Jess! When you agree with me, it makes me question whether or not I actually agree with me!

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Dario: What would you do if I was kidnapped?

Jess: Nothing. I’d wait for 15 minutes when they’d give you back voluntarily

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Thomas: Sometimes we screw things up for the better.

Jess: That’s good! We should use that motto.

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

I'm not questioning your honour, Brendan. I'm denying its existence.

Jess, probably

[incorrectgreatlibraryquotes]

Khalila: So, no matter how shallow and self-absorbed you pretend to be...

Dario: Excuse me, there's no pretence here. I happen to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow.