Let's be honest here, this IS a ridiculous shirt. But it is just so Director Aof to put one of his characters in such a ridiculous shirt during a poignant scene.
This is Baseball Mom 2.0
And I say that not only because it's ridiculous but because, just like Baseball Mom, it also has a deeper meaning connected to the narrative - as is Aof's style - and it's what I adore about his work, that he puts so much attention to detail into the characters' wardrobe.
But on to the shirt.
If we can get past the loudness of the "FART PROUDLY" we can see the rest of the text reads approximately as thus:
I believe a fart is a healthy, natural thing - and is nothing to be embarrassed about. I have pledged myself to changing societies attitude towards farts by showing that I am not afraid to release my farts freely - wherever, whenever - and without shame.
And yes, it's about farts BUT the underlying messages here are the parts I have highlighted.
Throughout ep 2, Mhok tries to encourage Day to get out of his room, to "open his eyes" to things, to remind him the rest of his body still 'works' ("Your hands are available" / "You can still hear"), to try things before dismissing them. He learns that Day is scared of how he is perceived by others and tells Aon there's nothing to be embarrassed about. He asks Day why he cares what people think...all the while knowing to some capacity what it's like to to be judged on face-value. And Mhok is able to let that judgement roll off him, it seems he's able to meet his challenges without shame.
After Mhok gets fired, he uses this confidence to spend time in the market blindfolded. He's not afraid to feel uncomfortable and vulnerable in order to understand Day and what he's experiencing. He proudly endeavours to navigate through the space and to eat without his sight regardless of what others may think of him. He feels the fear, but does it anyway. He has no qualms about doing more than necessary - after all he could have just walked away and not thought about Day again. But, as the wardrobe choices tell us as well, the best never rest. And Mhok is one of the best.
Day used to be "a guy with confidence", and Mhok is trying to give that back to him. The t-shirt also asks "Can I count on you, now, to stand behind me?" which, in the context of the farting, could be 'are you willing to endure my farts?' or 'will you join me in farting freely', but with Mhok and Day it's 'are you with me? Can you be brave enough to not be embarrassed? To say fuck it and live your life regardless of others?' and/or 'will you let me help and protect you?'.
Mhok cares a lot. Not about what others think of him - he had no hesitation to get naked and let people watch when Day asked ('do this and I'll forgive you' -> 'how brave are you? how brave can you be for me?') - but about Day and the other people in his life. And Day is also starting to care - he not only left his house to see Mhok but agreed to let a relative stranger take him to a very crowded and, having been shut in his room for a year, what must have been a very scary place. Which makes Day's t-shit in this scene equally fitting. "Capacity Intensive Care".
It may be small now - their care and affection for each other - but it will soon grow, even if they don't see it yet. But they'll both be getting "more care, more often, right where [they] live".
the first time i watched vice versa i stopped after ep 1 because the plot was confusing. then decided to give it another go after seeing gifs of vice versa x our skyy 2 and all that domesticity is killing me, also jimmysea looked so good with long hair and knew i had to watch the series first to know what’s going on. and i’m glad i made the choice.
we start this journey with our boy talay, a colorist, played by sea tawinan. got into an accident that traveled his soul to another body in another universe. tess, a spoiled-rich film student kid.
the same thing happened to our actor, puean, played by jimmy potiwihok. got into an accident and traveled into another universe as a scriptwriter named pakorn.
they make real effort to help us differentiate talay in his body with talay in tess’s. talay originally uses glasses and wear simple outfits, while being tess, he had to wear colorful ass outfits (and his lil sling bags so cute). same with puean as pakorn, his usual attire is a simple t-shirt and totebag. and now, the travelers, unite!
before all the shit that’s going down, they’ve met before in the airport restroom. talay gave him a bucket hat that he designed himself. puean didn’t know his name (probably thought just another fan lmao). the hat will later connect the two in the alternate universe.
how’s the plot? it’s a gem. literally got so mad i took it personally when finding out this series is underrated because they don’t deserve this but whatever. it’s fantasy, alternate universe thingy so as expected there will be so many details they need to pay attention to to minimize plot holes and they DID. how do we explain about this changing bodies thing to the audience? how do we make sure they won’t get too confused, but still leave a little room for them to think and analyze? how do we highlight the differences between the characters so that the audience will know who’s who because the visual won’t exactly show what is actually being shown?
for example, they show talay, but you have to remember that what the people around him saw is actually not talay in his body, but talay in tess’s. you can see in the comment section some people try to confirm this—they are confused, which is normal as you will need a while to get used to this, but i promise by ep 3 you won’t need to think anymore.
the details. gosh. i just love this universe. they use transparent papers and eat corn breads instead of rice, cotton candy instead of birthday cake, and they have their own culture as well. instead of blowing the birthday candles they must stare at it until it dies. they count from their thumb and not forefinger, and the university students don’t need to use uniforms. the places they shot at literally looked unreal, like the place where talay & puean met for their matchmaking, the maze, the glass-restaurant, etc. and last but not least, it’s finally snowing in thailand! all these differences are being highlighted so well and you’d feel like you want to live in that universe as well.
the cinematography. this series revolves around the world of film-making as talay is a colorist, living in a body of tess who’s a film student, and puean being an actor living in a body of pakorn, a scriptwriter. so you get the connection here. they focus so much on the use of colors to emphasize how this second universe is different with the other. and also, each episodes have their own color theme with its own meaning too. genius.
jimmysea flirting is all that i need i have to write a paragraph about this. the flirtings aren’t too cheesy and even realistic, like their subtle gestures etc. which made this pairing look so natural and not cringy. their chemistry is so good so i don’t get why people say they don’t have chemistry. jimmysea delivered so well about how dependent pueantalay is with each other, by always being together, puean keep telling talay he wouldn’t want to be in this universe without him and him being scared of them separating. talay is obviously more embarrassed admitting this, but he kept asking puean to make sure he won’t leave him as well, that he’d wait for him. also they add just enough jealousy and conflict, at the end we can see how much they are tied to each other<3
and they highlight the difficulties of them having to continue a life that is not their own. talay being worried how tess’s going to takeover his life, while puean was almost being too carried away by the freedom he finally got living pakorn’s life. and he has family there, too. they give us enough information about puean’s background which makes this series a tear-jerker as well. i love how they don’t make it all unicorn and sparkles. you'll see why later.
don’t even get me started with the plot twist. no one expected that ‘error’. sea is so amazing switching talay from his usual calm and optimistic self to him being miserable and so so scared. that beach scene is poetic
so...
i didn’t know much about jimmysea before because they are overshadowed by other pairings and i’m SO glad i watched vice versa. i knew jimmy from bad buddy, and sea later from 55:15 never too late. he’s new to business but i love his acting already (got so excited and wanted to watch his other projects but he only has 55:15 and vice versa so far). we could already guess what kind of vibe this pairing has, let’s say if gmmtv producers were about to make angst series jimmysea would fit best (*cough* last twilight *cough*). they look so natural together and none of their acting looks forced or even cringy.
the rate is 9.5% with the 0.5% being little errors and plot holes, vice versa is that good but nothing is perfect anyways. like how did talay return to his universe? they might be fast-forwarding this but i think this part is as important as how puean returned. and they didn’t emphasize the confusion between tess’s friends about tess (actually is talay) being close again to pakorn after their conflict. and the error that happened to them: they are each other’s portkeys, yet turns out that even if you’ve found your portkey it doesn’t always mean you will return together. no one in the association group has ever experienced the same thing or at least knew about this possibility? with dol having already stayed in this universe for 5 years, they make it looks as if this thing is so new because they just started to innovate things.
in conclusion: i’m fucking satisfied. should we continue this with my review of vice versa x our skyy 2? of course.
you see i’m a die-hard msp fan (front-line mommy) and didn’t know at all about our skyy projects, thought it’d be just a little continuation of each series. still don’t know how i feel about tinngun switching bodies though and i guess others are just as crazy as that (what’s going on with patpran in atots universe?!) but i’m glad vice versa is so simple this is literally what i need. just pueantalay living their domestic life, passing their honeymoon phase and them making real effort to fuel their romance back to life, and taking care of a kid (!!).
i love jimmysea’s hair so much sea rocked that mullet and jimmy looked so baby! i can totally imagine a retired actor finally able to live a simpler life as a scriptwriter, not having to care much about looks and stuff. puean looks so homey and talay is so daddy anyway it's no doubt talay spoiled him so much puean is living the dream
they don't have to do us like this puean having flashbacks equals me crying shaking throwing up
actually this is not so much of a review, but everyone must know how heartwarming they made me feel. so yeah. cheers for pueantalay and their domestic husbands life<3
ok can we assume that top took sand's ex away which started a feud between them, and can we assume that sea will play this ex bf? I don't even know which is more tempting: interaction with first or interaction with force. pls let me stay in my fantasies as long as possible waiting for each new ep for sea to appear in the screen
IM GONNA BE RIGHT HERE WAITING WITH YOU ANON AND EVEN IF TURNS OUT THAT SAND'S EX ISN'T PLAYED BY SEA IM STILL GONNA BE WAITING FOR HIM TO SHOW UP AS A CAMEO UNTIL THE VERY END I DON'T CARE I LOVE BEING DELUSIONAL
like of course sea playing sand's ex would be THE DREAM because it would mean firstsea AND forcesea interactions, and like you said IDK WHICH ONE MAKES ME MORE EXCITED EITHER, but honestly i would be fine with a very minor cameo like drake's in episode 1 too IM REALLY OKAY WITH ANYTHING AS LONG AS WE GET SEA IN ONLY FRIENDS
also i do wonder what happened between sand and top. sand's ex is definitely the reason behind their animosity, but like everything in this show i doubt it's gonna be as simple as top 'stealing' him from sand. from the way sand talked about having to be careful not to feel more when you have sex with a friend, i think maybe he found himself in a position similar to nick's? like maybe he was in a friends with benefits kind of relationship but he ended up falling in love and believed they had become more but then his 'ex' slept with top and it's easier blaming top for it rather than accept the fact that his friend/'ex' didn't actually love him at all? but that does seem WAY TOO SIMILAR to the nick/boston/top situation so idk MAYBE WE'LL FINALLY FIND OUT MORE IN NEXT WEEK'S EP
BUT THE POINT IS THAT IM GONNA KEEP MANIFESTING SEA IN ONLY FRIENDS AS HARD AND FOR AS LONG AS I CAN
discussion #6 (only friends): boyfriend, bed friend and friend with benefit— are these colours a possible 'spoiler' to their ending?
three couple posters were released, and i'm thrilled to see three primary colours representing each pair. after sanray's green bed friend and topmew's red boyfriend were shared, i speculated bostonnick's to be yellow. one of the reasons this prediction arise is because of the nature of their relationship/personality and also my personal opinion on these pairs' possible ending.
however, i saw this tweet last night and i thought it was very insightful. thanks to op for sharing their input. it's interesting to observe these colours associated with each pair from the viewpoint of the traffic light. :)
thus, in this post, i wish to highlight some core points and assumptions about the dynamic/nature of each pair that corresponds with their designated colours; red, green and yellow.
as always, this (and any) of my discussion post is a space to welcome a disparity of thoughts from everyone who watches this drama. please take it with a grain of salt. :)
[warning: a very long post ahead].
let's begin.
topmew | boyfriend [jealousy and manipulation]
first and foremost, when this poster dropped, i was surprised. i didn't expect topmew to get this colour. i was expecting red to represent sanray because of their passion and overall fieriness. even in the trailer, we can see how tense those two are, like fire on fire, one inciting the flame and the other just making it worse.
however, after watching the trailer again, i understand the purpose of red as topmew's colour.
before we jump into the assumption, let's dive into the meaning behind the colour.
red: an emblem of true love and revenge
red often symbolises strength, passion, action and energy. the simplest example i can use in this context is the red rose. usually, a red rose is given to glorify the profound love a person has for someone. it's ironic considering red is also the colour of blood— and blood is somewhat a sacred and eerily beautiful symbol of infatuation in many love, tragic, horror and sad stories.
despite its positive connotations, red also means danger, anger, revenge and aggression. as i've mentioned, red is another classic symbol/motif/metaphor of anger used in many stories or movies— the best example is also blood.
why red is topmew's colour?
jealousy
interestingly, aside from the poster, there's something else in the tweet that needs attention.
เราเล็งใครไว้ ไม่เคยพลาดนะ translates to whoever we aim for, we never miss. this is the line top says to mew when they are playing laser tag (which looks so fun).
i find it fascinating when top says this because it happens after top catches mew hugging ray;
why does this matter? well, i believe this is the start of top's jealousy.
the clenched jaw, his body tensing, and a tiny bit of sadness in those eyes— i have to say, this is one of the points that can potentially be top's moment of epiphany. this (or the kiss in the shower) might be when top realises he likes mew.
additionally, it's very ironic that topmew are playing laser tag; a game that focuses on strategising and 'killing' your opponent. this somehow makes me view topmew's relationship as a hunter hunting its prey. however, in their case, top believes he's the hunter (as explained in top's introduction post, top is the top of everything). yet, top has never met the best opponent. not until mew.
p'book explained that mew is helpful and generous with his friends. but one thing he despises the most is dishonesty. people who take advantage of him will face the greatest disaster. these are very strong representations of mew's character, already denoting mew's colour as red. my initial thought was mew was generally blue (calm and level-headed), but his colour will change when his trust on top falters.
furthermore, as i've mentioned in my previous discussion posts, mew is more than what we think he is. the introduction post is already giving so much of mew's personality and vibe. he doesn't smile that much, and his eyes are very dark and hollow. the smirk he wears is not really evident, but it promises a sinister and potent impact. (once again, kudos to p'book for portraying these nuances of mew so well even in the intro video. i still get goosebumps when i watch it.)
top thinks he can outsmart mew. i believe he's going to eat his words someday.
side note: boston displays lenience when he's with top. boston is more of the submissive type with top, proof is taken when they had sex in the car, boston does all the work. this illustrates the power top has over boston and his reluctance to lose. it's also likely that boston was the one who called top that night, even though he (might have) known top was with mew before.
when top knows he likes mew— genuinely likes him and experiences jealousy for the first time— this is why he (and mew) represents red; you're mine. don't be someone else's. just mine.
manipulation
next, in the shower scene, top says—
—and is followed by a kiss.
as p'force mentioned in his intro post, the word love that comes from top's mouth is never sincere.
side note: i'm a bit conflicted when i learned about this because it made me think of two possibilities, 1) top genuinely falls for mew after they become boyfriends or 2) top never likes mew and he's just playing with him (like his other boyfriends/casual hookups). i hope top will like mew for real because if he doesn't, it won't really add much to his character— or simply, it'll just make him a flat character at the end. also, it doesn't give significance to mew's character as well, given his transformation is deeply rooted in top's dishonesty.
in both scenes, top says things that i personally don't understand its significance, but it's his way of claiming ownership and setting foot in mew's life, an indication that mew is his and he wants mew (and everyone) to know that.
it's a form of subtle manipulation from top— masked with sweet promises and again, (faked) honesty. top knows it's the only way to gain mew's trust: by making mew believe that top only sees and wants mew.
top surprises me in this frame because is that jealousy and anger on his face? (i think it is).
it's the way he says it. the slight quiver of his voice, the quietness of it almost brings forth his insecurity about losing mew's trust. although he's certain mew likes him too, ray is mew's friend and they've known each other longer than mew knows top. in one way or another, mew will possibly believe ray more than top, given mew hates dishonesty in a friendship/relationship. mew will treasure anyone who treasures him, but top worships and bends mew's trust simultaneously. something painful will be the price top has to pay after the truth unfolds.
another act of manipulation i noticed from mew is when top hugs mew and cries.
i believe mew might want a break-up at this point, but top doesn't want to. the little smile mew wears is an indication that mew knows he won this fight— he successfully manipulated top into thinking yes, i'm wrong. yes, i lied to you. yes, i can't live without you. an honourable mention includes mew's little smirk when top hugs him on the bed.
mew has it in him— that instinct— the hey, this top guy is interesting. mew keeps his cards safely in his hands, and once he thinks it's best to use them, oh, he will.
it's going to be very fascinating if this is the shift of mew's transformation— if this will be the second mew starts kicking off his plans on destroying top.
topmew's possible ending
as red signifies revenge, i think topmew won't be the endgame.
i personally think it'll be silly/unrealistic if mew still gives top a chance even after discovering about him and boston. it also doesn't add up to mew's personality as someone who is determined, resolute and sticks to his virtues. them being together at the end isn't what i want. the ending i want from topmew is 1) top will learn from his mistakes and 2) mew doesn't rely on love and friendship to determine the route of his personal life (he should take charge and make decisions for himself).
i assume topmew's break-up will be the start of mew's character growth and a revelation of top's true personality. but them being the endgame? i hope they won't. hehe.
//it's funny to me considering i adore forcebook but i don't want topmew to end up together...//
sanray | bed friend [safety and envy]
previously, i correlated sanray with greed and gluttony (thoroughly explained in this post). i view sanray as the right person and right time, but ray is somewhat too afraid to admit it, and san is somehow 'weak' to make ray believe it's true.
however, despite the turmoils they face in this relationship, there's a strong feeling of positivity i get from these two (and also bostonnick). why?
do you notice: sanray and bostonnick have always been honest with each other?
ray says he just wants someone to keep him company. san wishes ray can just focus on him. boston says he doesn't love nick that way. nick wishes boston can only love him. from the start of their relationship, they always vocalise what they really want from each other.
side note: topmew is different because they aren't honest, to begin with. we can expect a painful downfall from a relationship that is based on deceit.
but what is green, and why does it symbolise sanray's relationship?
green: a token of hope and balance
the colour generally has a positive meaning. green often resembles nature, and nature encompasses home, balance and relaxation. yet, green also means envy and judgement, hence the saying, green with envy.
why green is sanray's colour?
safety
ray (and i assume, top) are battling with different mental health issues. possibly, ray suffers from depression (assumption made by the bathtub scene when mew hugs ray),
and top is insomniac (pills scattering near the sink).
(i can be wrong).
what i'm trying to say is ray might feel 'bare' and 'naked' as his feelings for mew aren't reciprocated. this also roots in his insecurity in knowing that this won't change— mew won't ever like him— especially after he likes top. ray knows he no longer has a chance with mew despite still liking mew. and that messes with his head.
what does ray want in his life? security. a home. a place to be and feel safe.
i don't know if i can explain this well, but there's always dread whenever something doesn't go how we want it to be? i think that's ray's major problem: he can't come to terms with his feelings. he sees the world as a solid entity. he doesn't possess the fluidity to 'shape' himself differently from that belief. thus, this is why ray is so afraid of the growing infatuation he has for san, because san isn't in that box— it has always been mew. but mew doesn't want to be in that box— san does.
ray is a ticking bomb in the sense that he's very unexpected and volatile. there are many instances in the trailer that shows ray's explosive reaction and approach when he confronts san. one of the examples is when ray says having san in his life won't make it better (it's the opposite. ray knows this too.)
all he wants is safety and assurance. ray also wants clarity and an end to the doubts in his head. befriending san, having this 'bed friend' relationship helps ray see that it's possible. but as i explained, ray doesn't know if he can have that with san. it's a very sad and (twisted) understanding of love. ray believes he's 'cheating' on mew by having romantic feelings for san. yet, i reckon, mew doesn't want ray to feel that way. mew also wants ray to find his happiness, even if it's not from/with him.
i do believe ray's perception of love will change. there's going to be a cathartic moment he experiences one day that gives him the certitude he needs. san has always been the door that ray can open anytime. it's only a matter of acceptance and forgiveness that will save ray from his own devils. it's only a matter of time for ray to accept his feelings as they are— to take san's hands and walk on this journey together.
envy
envy is a potent driving force between san and ray. even though it's mainly from ray, san also shows nuances of envy.
in one way or another, san knows ray likes mew. but san likes ray— ray (who isn't ready) to like san back.
the pattern i see in every couple is they're each other's reflection. they might not realise it now, but they will when they're about to lose their other half.
in sanray's case, san hasn't fully grasped ray's train of thought. although he assumes he knows what ray is thinking, his speculations aren't entirely true. it's also because san has his own ideas about ray and how this relationship should work.
san wants to fit ray into his mould and expects ray to abide by it, but he knows too well that ray is still bound to mew. this will frustrate san the most and further amplifies his anger/despair/jealousy.
(why must first cry in every role he acts in? my heart is breaking for him...)
i guess it has to do with san's personality as a survivor (extracted from san's intro post). he battles with himself every day to make ends meet. he isn't financially well-off while ray is rich.
furthermore, from this line included in the poster tweet;
เพื่อนกัน เค้าไม่คิดตังค์เว้ย = friends, they don't think about money, parallel this scene—
—which adds another layer to san's character as a faithful/sincere/kind person/lover. he doesn't blur the lines between friendship and love if his feelings aren't involved (making him a bit selfish, but it's a given when a person so strong-headed and passionate like san starts loving something/someone). from the beginning, san never wants ray's money even though that's the most important thing in his life.
different living status promises a different set of challenges. i don't mean to be biased, but the reality is, the poor will always endure the toughest battle. therefore, san's insecurity is valid, and his confusion is necessary. why?
as san's feelings for ray grow, he starts doubting his worth. he doesn't have much to offer, only his body, soul and time— that's all. san will make deductions— am i just only that to ray? just a bed friend? can he ever be more than that to ray?
sanray's possible ending
sanray is the pair that i hope (and somehow confident) will get a happy ending.
there's so much to them that fits the holes and gaps in each other. they do feel like two people finally finding one another after all the chaos and heartbreaks. they make me want to root for them because the pain they've endured is just so gut-wrenching that i insist they'll be the endgame no matter the circumstances.
i also believe since green is their colour, sanray will achieve that balance and harmony in the end. despite not knowing how and when they'll get to that stage, i'm quite certain they'll be together. these two incendiary characters can finally simmer down the rupturing fire in them by being together, taking and discarding the positive and negative, and also achieving the clarity they've always wanted— together.
bostonnick | friend with benefit [happiness and egoism]
from the two trailers, we get so little of boston and nick's dynamic. it touches on the core elements; lust and envy (further explained in this post). we're seeing only the gist of what and who they are to each other and other people, which attributes to a wonderful surprise awaiting us once only friends airs.
i expected bostonnick's colour will be either yellow or orange, and i'm happy my assumption hit the jackpot this time hehe. although boston's character is likely the antagonist of the story, nick balances his negativity really well. nick's brightness manages to dull boston's darkness.
yellow: a sign of happiness and egoism
yellow is generally a happy colour. it reminds me of the sun; bright and hot. yellow is often associated with cheerfulness and energy. it's a colour that incites many good emotions.
even though this colour shines with positivity, yellow can also represent cowardice and lies; it also acts as a precautionary sign; kind of like the traffic light; yellow— prepare to stop (not to speed up hahaha).
why yellow is bostonnick's colour?
happiness (light)
i see bostonnick as yellow because i think they're genuinely happy when they're together.
boston to me is very red, and nick is somewhat white. they're from two different ends of the colour spectrum, with nick being the bright sunshine while boston is the dark clouds. however, i see only positive influences nick has on boston, mainly when they meet outside of the bed and in the red (developing) room.
their relationship might begin because of boston's habit/obsession with capturing moments of sex with his partners. nick might be the tech-savvy guy that is coincidentally working on the day boston pays a visit. the universe really wants them to meet somehow.
i can't exactly picture how they go from this;
to this;
i guess the attraction is mutual from the first encounter (or one of them is very horny at that time [read: boston]), and they begin to confide in each other afterwards.
although we know the foundation of their relationship is mainly boston seeking nick's help (with his equipment (?) and urges), there are also moments of them spending time with each other like how lovers do. the wakeboarding date (?) and other possible meetings are just happy days spent together.
moreover, it's evident that nick is happy to be boston's favourite.
regardless of boston still having an on-and-off connection with top, boston will cave into nick more and more because nick can give him everything he wants fast. nick's availability appeals so much to boston. this makes nick his favourite because again— boston and his idea of controlling the things he likes— applies to nick too.
side note: i don't know if boston is a sex manic or he's insatiable, but i assume nick doesn't mind feeding boston's constant need for intimacy (even though it'll hurt him the most eventually).
ego
boston has a big ego, and he knows this. that ego is one of boston's strongest (and toxic) traits. like top, boston believes he can have everything and anything he wants. why? because of his brazenness, boston doesn't really have much fear in him as well as decency. he's the go-big-or-go-home type of person. this portion of boston is also one of his most appealing qualities, and nick clearly takes the bait.
however, boston's ego is also his greatest downfall. he thinks he won't be affected if someday, nick decides to leave him for good (and go to p'papang's character, which i honestly approve of). when that day comes, it will make boston realise (hopefully) that the truth is; he does love nick all along.
but this is the thing boston and top have in common: they don't understand what love is. the concept of love to them is vague and stupid. they don't know if true love exists, and i'm guessing it has to do with their (painful? embarrassing?) past experiences. they perceive love in the same manner; sex. they objectify their loved ones to benefit their pride and ego. if they don't get something in return, it'll be useless. they won't use them.
boston says he never loves nick because he knows he has never given nick anything but pain and pleasure. a part of boston is aware that he's unforgivingly mean, but it's a feature he can't discard easily; this ego. boston can't see himself falling to his knees and acknowledging his feelings for nick because that hurts his pride.
boston is a walking disaster, and he doesn't want to lose that title— he glorifies that label— because it makes him feel powerful and in control, a common trait of a narcissist.
and because boston clouds himself by believing nick is just an object, he gets angry when nick stops serving his purpose; to satisfy boston. it infuriates boston that nick found his voice and wants boston to listen to his needs. boston can't let that happen, mainly because of his ego. he's just too prideful to be at anyone's mercy.
it's not because nick can't get enough of boston— it's boston who never thinks nick is enough.
side note: let's be real— top chooses mew. top wants mew. top sees boston as an object of lust. that's all. what he does to nick is what top does to him. it's like boston's cry of protest— feeling unwanted by someone he (thinks) he wants.
yet, boston also uses his ego to control, play and manipulate nick's feelings.
sadly, nick's honesty gets the best of him because boston prefers to overlook that sincerity; nick's desire for love.
กูแค่อยากให้มึงรักกูคนเดียว = i just want you to love only me; boston can't. his ego doesn't let him.
bostonnick's possible ending
i'm inclined to bostonnick having an open/ambiguous ending. like the colour yellow, there's going to be a balance of optimism and cowardice. nick might still want to be with boston despite the hell boston brings into his life because he really loves boston. unlike mew, nick doesn't have malicious intent (i don't see this in him, really) in seeking revenge etc. he reminds me of the character that is truly broken by a person they love the most. nick somehow illustrates how pure love is and how painful it can be.
also, it'll be exciting if there's a redemption arc for boston as he's likely the antagonist of this story (honourable mention will be mew). he might realise nick's worth and start things over. there'll be hesitation and doubts— does nick still loves me?— but if boston is honest and willing to fix this, nick is always open to accepting him.
nick has a soft spot in my heart and i'm genuinely hoping better days will come to him (because mark shared in nick's intro post, nick cried so much. it's rare to get a smiling nick).
conclusion
colours play an important role in telling or showing intent, purpose and significance. it's a widely used symbol/motif/theme/metaphor to give the audience a better picture of the storyline, plot, characters, etc.
as always, i find it interesting that these primary colours are so basic but it gives so much depth to these three couples. all of them are distinctly unique with so many humane attributes. it's riveting almost to see three different dynamics in a series.
their red and green and yellow will bring forward so many colourful emotions from us. are we ready to be painted black at the end of the drama?
side note: do you know? the first step in making black is mixing red, green and yellow.
(i tried it with pencil colours and it's almost black. all it needs is a touch of blue.)
what awaits us? are these colours the possible spoiler to each pair's destiny? let's find out starting this saturday. surely, it'll be a hell of a ride.
I chose the poolside as a place for TinnGun to open up and talk because it’s symbolism that Tinn is like water that always embraces and supports Gun, holding him and not letting him drown. – AU KORNPROM NIYOMSIL
I think Ben's kiss is very important. If it wouldn't have happened, Nueng probably wouldn't have snapped that extremely. But now he got to feel how it's like to have someone who craves him thus he realizes he craves Palm. The kiss opened his eyes but he knows he has to handle it himself like he always has...he's certainly not good at it.
The struggle was visible the second Nueng set foot into that party and saw Mackie. He talks to Ben and Ben wants to "rush" things whereas Nueng is just very pissed off. My anxiety went up because Nueng was honestly scary. He didn't smile, he talked monotonously, he was very stiff. He looked like someone either ready to kill himself or go to war. I can't describe the feeling but all alarms set off in my mind. Nueng tortures himself and he doesn't know what to do because everyone has a certain idea of him. The pressure and heartbreak and grief are all right there and he feels it. He felt how someone loves him and I think it really cracked him because he's still grieving his father after all. Receiving intense love can remind you of the love you once had in your hands and I think Nueng was just so pressured all the time to not let it show that he would have snapped any time soon. We know he's lonely, he knows it too but nobody else does and it truly nags on him that Palm doesn't look at him the whole party when he knows his secret.
Ben wants the same Nueng wants from Palm, so Nueng feels trapped in his own life. He hurts himself and others and he cannot handle it. He can't keep it together. He is overwhelmed. And because he knows it's all so complicated and because he thinks Palm likes Mackie, he ends up being a total asshole and screams about whatever just to scream at Palm. Just for the sake of it but it doesn't make him feel better. That's the sad realization we can see in his helpless eyes. He screams for help and Palm notices, so he wants to get Nueng out of there but well, Nueng is lost in drunk thoughts and seemingly unreasonable anger when he's just very sad.
Nueng wants to be saved so badly and he was never really mad at Palm. He would rather cry if he could but instead it's anger we and he get. It feels unfair and the world is always unfair. In the end it's Palm's name he calls when he can't breathe.