it's natural

he / 30+ / queer / masochist / creative / amenable / grasping / trans / taking this all too seriously

[nobrashfestivity]

Edvard Munch, The Voice, Summer Night, 1890s

more

[dead-dove-ble]

Actually you SHOULD make problematic content. You SHOULD explore dark or taboo topics. You SHOULD have a space where you can cope with your traumas or explore sensitive topics in a way that doesn't hurt anyone.

[shiptillyoudie]

Also you should make problematic content for funsies. You don't need to have had trauma or need to be coping in order to explore dark creativity. You can just be a human who wants to explore dark and taboo topics because you want to. That's completely normal, btw.

Every single person on this planet thinks about dark and taboo things. It's literally the most normal thing in the world.

Go draw the horror porn and be free.

[tackypies]

we should all be more like david cronenberg and write fucked up stuff. For Funsies

[typewriter-worries]

where's that picture that ruined my life

[typewriter-worries]

found it

[typewriter-worries]

this comic did the same thing

[ingenuflection]

My thoughts are so profoundly disorganized rnow I don't really know what to do. I feel like I'm ping-ponging back and forth between "I am so fucked up how did anyone ever give me a job or love me this long" and "there is nothing wrong with me this is normal and I'm just being a loser who can't handle it"

[ingenuflection]

There is something very deeply wrong with me

There is nothing wrong with me

I am in complete control

People have irreparably harmed me

But my suffering is my own

And I choose to be better

Every single hour

Because there is no other option

But to wallow and die

The person I am in reality

Is not the person I see

The words out of my mouth

Are not mine

And there is nothing wrong with me

Except for my weakness of will

[digituika]

the problem is that when you make yourself as a person into a work of art, a form of a spectacle, death of the author still applies

[egotomie]

[danielclooney]

[yepimweirdso]

[ingenuflection]

I spend my life hoping. For things to become easy. For pain to miss me. For pleasure. I fear friction. I think about every possible collision and every slight.

I hate this about myself. To where I recognize when I hope. When I fantasize about the absence of pressure. And I never allow myself that respite, to wallow in the false calm. I can never become accustomed, for it's so so much worse when it inevitably expires.

Id rather it never be there in the first place

[ace-trainer-alice]

But, why do you fantasize about being broken?

Is it that you crave the escape of an ending? It doesn't take much to leap from the window of a burning building. A clean break lets it heal better. In high school, a migraine with aura was a rare break for me, so I looked forward to the pain. It's all so loud, so overwhelming, so much. To be broken is to finally escape.

Or do you yearn for what comes after? To be broken down into nothing and rebuilt. Rendered into a possession and taken care of as one. Do you pick your tormentors by their empathy? Do you crave fingers that will take you apart with love? Truly is there anything more intimate than destruction.

Or is it the legibility that destruction brings? Don't you ever wish the things wrong with you were more obvious? You won't take pain meds because you're not sure you really need them. You find yourself putting off appointments because right now it's still livable. You can still put one foot in front of the other. The idea of the world seeing you break is electric.

Or is it something else? A blend of all three? Why is it? Tell me. I wish for nothing more than to know.

[starjasmines]

im jerking off to abstractions of abstractions of abstractions. concepts you coudn't even dream up. these signs and the things they signify are so hot. but you'd never get it.

[bakwaaas]

the internet has made people feel like their personal opinion on every topic is valuable and important and holds equal weight to everyone else’s but the truth is some spaces aren’t for you and some things you just can’t relate to or understand and that’s okay. learn when to stay quiet instead of inserting yourself into conversations that are actually nothing to do with you

[vomitpartyart]

Heel

[starsonmarsy]

saying "listen—" to someone who is teasing you is a trap btw. because then they will tell you to go on and then tease you even more for having nothing to say

[miscling]

and you should still say it anyway!

[thickkdude]

[vintage-tigre]