IntelliZom

Kels | 31 | They/Them/She/Her | Interests may include and are not limited to: glitter, googly eyes, sharks, noir films, puns, the Oxford comma, and wheat-free baked goods.

[homunculus-argument]

Fantasy idea: The reason why elves always sound so eloquent and poetic is because they only learn human languages from classic human poems and literature - they are aware that the language in them is very quickly outdated, but it's still easier to maintain and keep up than trying to learn new human vernacular every single new century. They don't talk like that in elvish. Going like

"If all came to pass as my eyes see and my heart pieces it together, it was wolves who tore our camp asunder. At the darkest hour, in the shelter of the night and emboldened by the shadows and our unguarded, defenseless sleep, they emerged from the woods like gaunt thieves to seek whatever they could take."

[another elf, in elvish] "What did you say?"

"Wolves. Them fucking varmints ripped up our shit."

[huffylemon]

[aureatearthrodire]

SPEΛKING FROM EXPERIENCE: IT'S KIND OF BOTH. INHΛLE THROVGH MOVTH, EXHΛLE THROVGH GILLS.

[paesthethyc]

immediately that visual is so cool in my head

[homunculus-argument]

I have no strong feelings about Hamilton the musical one way or another, but the sentence "I wasn't aware that was something a person could do" is such a perfect way to precisely express the kind of "not judging, just baffled" response people sometimes inspire in me with their antics and activities.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[wellwickedstuff]

[james-wilsons-mommymilkers]

I think we should have a second pride month in November for gay people who prefer cold weather

[ink-phoenix]

#thats just Halloween

[sovietnam]

[somehow---here]

James Dean, Pete the cat

[rockabillywife]

[transfaguette]

hey kinda messed up that 1st degree burn is the mildest burn but 1st degree murder is the worst murder. they should have collaborated more on that one.

[neonfretra]

hell is full. heaven is full. god created a new holding space for souls called hurgle and the only thibg to do here is this infinitely expading jigsaw puzzle of a finely detailed pigeon. we are just slowwwwwly creating little tufts of feathers for eternity . yesterday , greg found a corner piece

[intelligent-zombie]

therapist: so i thought today we'd work on-

me: incorrect. this is my show for the next hour and i want to talk to you today about my 1973 Smithsonian collection of classical jazz

therapist: oh ok, but-

me: 6.

therapist: 6... what?

me: glad you asked. 6 LPs I have, not a SCRATCH ON THEM, not a MOTE OF DUST. a pristine landmark foundational collection, featuring louis armstrong, duke ellington, thelonious monk-

therapist: so do you think it's safe to say you have some hyperfixations we could-

me: *coughcough*AHEM and EllA FITGERALDJELLYROLLMORTONDIZZYGILLESPIEcHARLiEPARKERFatswalLERbILLIEHOLIDAYand

[quietwingsinthesky]

possession horror where the thing possessing the autistic character causes them to behave in a more neurotypical way. autistic possession horror where the thing inside you is easier to communicate with than you are, the thing inside you doesn’t have a flat affect, the thing inside you doesn’t let your body stim, the thing inside you is how you were told to behave and you can only do it when you are no longer you. autistic possession horror where you will never forget that everyone liked it better than you before they found out something was controlling you. autistic possession horror where they know what’s inside you isn’t you and debate whether it would be easier for everyone to leave you like this anyway. you agree. reblog.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

complimented a cashier on her turtle pin this morning and she said "oh thanks, I am a little bit of a Turtle Person" with the carefully contained energy of Cookie Monster telling you he's mildly fond of chocolate chips

I hope she and the multiple tons of turtle merch she definitely has at home are having a wonderful day

[intelligent-zombie]

what the fuck is this timeline

[highways-are-liminal-spaces]

Chicago, Illinois

[phantomrose96]

The come-down from doing a good deed is crazy. Like I think I could rescue a baby from a burning building and 30 minutes later I’d be like, “Idk was it cringe of me to run into that building like that? The baby didn’t even seem that happy to get rescued. Honestly maybe the baby started the house fire and I interrupted an important life lesson.”