Someone Had To

A random generator told me my sexual identity is thicc aesthetic gay. They/them/he/him. Theatre and Cinematic Arts double major. Will post random stuff.

[dammitxhaka]

Your parents' alignments based on how they named you

[ipushedher]

Does being named after a ship count as Chaotic Good? My sister was named after a relative.

[afro-elf]

since we're close to st paddy's i wanna speak diaspora to diaspora, idk which irish american needs to hear this but your folks didn't come over from their colonized homeland risking death and almost certain estrangement from their families for you to be a cop in boston

[afro-elf]

you know what, girls? i have a not super rad feeling about what this post’s notes are gonna look like in two hours

[kaijuno]

Real Irish Americans say fuck the police

[royaleclown]

baby yoda:

[stsebastiens]

aaaaa

aaaaaaaa

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA––

[sugakookiesbutbadass]

i’m not ready for the return of short hair bucky guys, i’m actually gonna die 

[musette22]

[liberalsarecool]

The dishonesty in this argument is off the charts.

[beeftea78-deactivated20200113]

some oddly specific advice from Hesiod (c700 BC)

[argumate]

which thicc girl hurt you (and stole your grain)

[theatsymbol-deactivated20210220]

Grain-stealing thots

[esoanem]

I’m trying to steal your granary but I’m dummy thicc and the clap of my decorated ass cheeks keeps alerting Hesiod

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

So the solution to the afterlife on The Good Place is...Judaism?

Cool.

[greatspacerace]

this is too good to only leave as a short text post. I’m gonna need the whole essay behind this to hang up on my wall.

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

So, this is TVGuide’s recap of the solution proposed to reform the afterlife: 

“as Eleanor puts it, the system treats life not as "a test that you either pass or fail but instead a class you take." The test comes in the afterlife, when a Good Place architect and a Bad Place architect team up to design a customized scenario that forces you to confront your moral flaws. The test can be anything — from being sent to a fake Good Place "by mistake" to reliving a version of your life — and its difficulty depends on the number of points you earned before death. Regardless of points, if you don't pass the test you're rebooted to take it again and again, with the hope that one day you'll learn enough to ace it and get into the Good Place.

"But wait," interrupts the version of Timothy Olyphant Janet conjured in her void, "how do you learn and grow if you're rebooted?" Thanks for asking, Tim. The trick is that after every reboot, you retain a vague memory of what you learned in your evaluation — like, in Eleanor's words, "a little voice in your head, helping you become a better version of yourself."”

Compare that this description of how the soul is cleansed in the afterlife in Judaism: 

“Gehinom [is not] a place for eternity, but a temporary—albeit terrible—place for the soul to be cleansed. In fact, the vast majority of souls do not stay in Gehinom for more than eleven months. Because we do not presume most people are so sinful as to warrant a twelve month sentence (reserved only for the wicked), the recital of Kaddish for a departed soul, which brings elevation to the soul and relief from Gehinom, is only recited for eleven months and thereafter only on the anniversary (Yartzeit) of death. On Shabbat all souls have an elevation. Souls in Gehinom are given relief, while those in the world of Yetzirah are allowed through the “Amud,” the pillar that connects the two worlds of Yetzirah and Beriah. After the purification of Gehinom, the soul enters the World to Come—the Garden of Eden—where it receives the rewards it earned through work in this world.”

Basically, the idea that the soul is put through a purification and cleansing in the afterlife before going on to its next destination is a Jewish concept (which makes sense because show creator Michael Schur is Jewish!). 

[okayysophia]

[nilim]

Ok, so I was reading this news story:

So far so normal, right? But then:

Like what. And then:

Like, I think Alaska State Trooper Ken Marsh wants to be a romance novelist. 

[bunchastuffs]

where’s the part where the State Trooper takes the rescued man to his work cabin/station for some food and rest before heading back to civilisation, but there was only one bed?

[iloveyourfeed]

[clitorous]

“Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes.” -Walt Whitman

[longwander]

This has 200k notes but none of you know the truth of the I Hate Rubber Boots Guy. This man lives in my city. He wears this outfit constantly. The Weird Toronto photo group has a ban on posting him because he’s always like this.  He has done this for years. Every so often he buys a taller pair of rubber boots.

[wordcubed]

#you can tell this is an old photo by the height of his boots

[wizardnuke]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[murrddocks-blog]

series: *male and female character make eye contact and smile*

me: oh no. oh god no please

[an-inspired-eternity]

[parakeet]

your bed is probably as happy to see you as you are to see it. ‘here comes the warmth slab’ it thinks

[targent]

wrong it thinks “god hope this dipshit doesnt spill beans all over me again who tf eats beans in bed”

[targent]

stop reblogging this new year new me i havent spilled beans in bed ONCE this year

[targent]

uh oh

[zoethrowingnightshade]

It gets funnier the earlier in the year you reblog it

[doctorbeth]

Blue Meanie and Turtle

I thought I’d make your Januaries a bit more interesting and introduce you to one of the less common patients I’ve had, a Blue Meanie of Yellow Submarine fame!  This Blue Meanie was from a family that had sent a frog (Froggie) to the hospital in the past for some minor clothing and eyelid repair.  Blue Meanie and his friend the turtle were new adoptees, who needed a touch more help.

Here is Blue Meanie’s diagnosis photos:

As you can see, he had a small nose wound, and his shoes were disintegrating.  He also had some hand injuries.  Since Blue Meanie is mostly felt, we agreed to avoid the water of a spa (too much risk of dye running and shrinkage).  Instead, his person opted to recover his shoes and stitch his other injuries.  Here he is, all better and ready to fly home:

Now the Blue Meanies may be meanies, but this one had a friend!  An elderly turtle who had a small neck injury, and really needed a swim in some bubbles!

Here are the turtle’s diagnosis photos:

Here he is enjoying his first swim in years:

He looks happy getting the back massage of water, doesn’t he?  He got a new heart of original stuffing, and lots of new stuffing.  I went for  a watery blue and pink heart so he’d always have some water.

The new stuffing, and some extra neck stitches, meant he was soon holding his head up proudly again, and his colors were nice and bright after his swim:

The two flew home to their person and Froggie in Oregon and their person wrote: They look amazing!

[bbdeathz]

[shiny-rhydon]

girls night out