dex whose north star disappeared during the blip. maybe this is me needing to rewatch season three and born again season one but idk when the blip happens during the daredevil timeline nor do i remember how long dex was in prison for. i want to say six years but who knows and for the sake of this post i am not looking it up.
because i don't really know the timeline, i cannot stop thinking which would be worse for dex in the long run; his north star being blipped when he's in prison or while he's free
if she's gone while he's in prison, lets say a year or less into his sentence and all communication from his north star just stops. no letters, no phone calls, no weekly visits, the one think keeping him sane and preventing him from breaking out of that hellish place. because if we want to be really honest, if dex had a north star/girlfriend he would NOT have served his time, even if she told him to for whatever reason, he'd struggle with wrapping his head around the fact his north star willingly wants them to be apart for so long
but thats another conversation.
i can imagine dex just sitting there, waiting at the table for his visit or in his cell for guards to come escort him to the visiting area. either way, like a good loyal dog, he sits there patiently waiting for his north star's return, trying not to let the time passing later and later get to him. gods help the poor guards who oversaw visiting hours that day. when time was up, and she still didn't show, they were shaking in their boots, doing round for round of rock paper sissors to see who the unlucky bastard was that would have to tell benjamin poindexter, bullseye, time was up and he'd have to wait a week for a chance to see her.
dex didn't want to wait a week. its been days since he's last heard from her. i think we can all agree prisons weren't safe from thanos so sure some inmates and a couple guards turned to dust but dex could never think in a million years it could happen to her. his north star. shes above all that, above all the scum who turned to nothing but specks in the air and more work for the cleaning crew.
and heres when it turns to ‘you/your’ pronouns causes its more natural for me to write i blame wattpad being the platform i learned to write
dex would crash the fuck out because he can't break himself out of his spiral. there was nothing, no one telling him you didn't leave him, because why wouldn't you show? if he gets in his head maybe you did get blipped and it wasn't your fault, that wouldn't be any better because that means something—someone took you from him and he wasn't there to protect you. long story short, dex gets thrown in solitary but not without taking out a handful or so of guards
maybe he'd ride out the years in prison because it was your last wish before you disappeared. that maybe the help he'd get in there would help him get better. you loved him the way he is, but if people still saw him as a scary, disgusting threat then the chance of him being taken away from you were too high. but now you weren't around for him to be taken from and that realization may cause him to snap and break out
on the other hand. if you were to have disappeared while you were together, it'd be much harsher on dex almost immediately. i'm picturing you two in your apartment, dex had to leave the room for one thing or another. he was gone for six seconds, he knows because he's counted and tracked the time he wasted took from you to his destination for an object he couldn't be bother to remember. nothing was more important than you. he looked away for six seconds
six seconds, it would have been 4 but he was distracted by a car that crashed into the sidewalk. saw dust evaporating and when he turned back to you, where you were supposed to be sprawled out on the couch like the angel you are. except, you weren't. and the couch is covered in dust slowly floating out the window you keep open for the stray that frequents for food.
dex wouldn't panic at first. he's too used to the pranks you pull, always pushing his buttons for your amusement. so dex calls your name and waits, then searches for you, calls your name and waits. then his searching gets more frantic, now he's calling your name with every step that turned into uncontrolled stomps. dex is checking closets, the pantry, the shower, cupboards you couldn't possibly fit into, the roof because you like to traces constellations on the back of his palm while complaining about not being able to see them.
he'd look for you for about a year, more maybe if no one confronts him. if matt for some reason comes to dex, pre-foggy i can see matt peeping how destroyed dex is as he's following bullseye's trail of bodies and trying to talk some sense into him. or dex could come to the conclusion on his own, though that would happen a lot more slowly and he just wouldn't be as convinced opposed to it coming from matt.
flash forward to when everyone comes back from the blip. your shared apartment has turned into a shrine. nothing has been touched since the day you left aside from a few guns on the table and holes in the wall. pictures of you and dex, of your friends and family have turned into rows of framed photos of just you.
dex comes home at the right time, you're mind had just stopped reeling from the sudden change, because well... nothing has changed at least not on your end. sure it was daylight outside just a few seconds ago but.... maybe you fell asleep. sure, but then, when did dex leave? and since when did he have on his bullseye suit.
the two of you would stare at each other for a while. dex frozen in the door way, you a little disoriented wondering why your ben was acting so strange, when he went from the bedroom to your front door. then he walks past you as if he didn't notice your presence in the first place.
he doesn't flinch when you call his name, he pauses when you grab his hand, looks at you and with all the cold malice you thought you'd never receive from him, dex spits at you, "go away" heads to the bedroom and slams the door.
your left standing there, hurt, confused and scared. not because of dex, kinda because of him, but because now there were shouting and loud noises coming from outside. so you turn on the tv because maybe at least someone in there will tell you what the hell was happening.
dex, our poor death row husband. went a little crazy in your absence. we see how he took julie's body with him to kill fisk. i can imagine he would start hearing you in his head, maybe not full on hallucinations, but he fully could not function without you to the point where his brain had to make up a fictious you just to keep going. while it worked, he hated it.
he didn’t want something fake his mind made up, even if at times when he gets really bad, it nearly convinces him. he wants you. he wants the real thing. he wants your hands on his skin. your real warm lips kissing away his tears. your soft words chasing away the noise until all he knows is your breath, your name and you heart beat
so when you appeared in the living room after a night of gruesome work, in the same pajamas you left him in, looking like an angel in the neon glow, he didn’t believe you were real. your voice echoes when you call him name and you look so confused, so loving when you look at him not disappointed or scared or disgusted like he knew he deserved for whats become of him in your absence
he retreats into the bedroom to escape you, fully expecting you to appear in the room behind him. but you don’t and there’s a commotion outside. dex let himself look, if only to distract himself from the daunting fact he’s finally gone insane. it doesn’t really hit him, how he’s seeing people being reformed from dust until a tv turns on in the distance
and suddenly he’s in the hallway, staggering towards the source of the sudden chatter. when he sees you lit up all in up and silver, he chokes and he doesn’t really have time to think much else other than your name when you come running up to him with tears in your eyes.
your hands on his biceps as you look into his eyes, pressing into his skin as you drag them up his shoulders, neck, raking your fingers through his hair with enough pressure to ground him. dex is stiff when you tuck his head under your chin. a moment later, his hands are holding your waist, hips, clawing gloved nails and down your back.
he’d be whispering, “are you real?” and not even notice until you shush him, because he’s too focused on your scent, which had been nothing but a dying memory for years, how it shuts everything off but sets his skin and every one of his senses on fire.
you’re muttering back, “i’m sorry” which dex has to shut down immediately with a harsh, salty kiss. he was the one who treated you so harshly when you just came back to him. he should have trusted that you could never leave him on your own.
then fade to black…. i might add more of this later if i come up with something thing else
