synopsis: for years, you have lived in a quaint, tiny neighbourhood, where you have a handful of favourite places, including the store next door. the store you run into whenever you've run out of laundry pods or when you're washed out from the rain. When the storeowners went on a vacation, they left the store's care to their niece who's your childhood nemesis, it left you debating whether it's your favourite place anymore.
contents: enemies to lovers (???) , sloww burnn , angst , a lot of fluff , ellie is reader's childhood nemesis , ellie is an absolute ass , flirting , eventual SMUT (r!receiving , oral sex , fingering , aftercare) explicit languange. word count : 10.7k! men and minors dni !!
If someone had a competition for the most messiest house award, no one would want to compete on it if their competition is you.
It's a Sunday afternoon, so your house is in the messiest state it has ever been.
There are clean, but wrinkled clothes on the couch, the floor is wet because you accidentally elbowed your water bottle from the kitchen island, which caused you to slip like a cartoon character, in which state you're in now.
Leg? Practically broken. Back? Hurts. It didn’t particularly help when you tried to drag yourself through the living to get on the couch where you melted in the sheets as a triumph. You sat there for a while, having an existential crisis and deciding whether to call your mom or just lay there until you rot and for your cat to eat you alive and then—
Ding!
Your ears perked up immediately, “Wait!” you groan as you tell the person behind the door to wait as you try to gather your mop and broom as a makeshift crutch.
You opened the door and to your surprise, Maria was there. She took one look at your current state— the broom-mop crutch, the banshee hair, and the tears leaving a salty path in your eyes— and with no hesitation helped you with your leg, taking your right arm to hook it over her shoulders.
“Oh, sweetheart, what happened now?” Maria asks, her voice honeyed.
You don’t want to be a burden to her, really. But lately, ever since your sisters left you alone in your house, Maria has nursed you in every way possible. When you once got burned by a flaming hot pan, your first instinct was to come to their store as much as possible. That store has been a lifeline for you, and the owners—Maria and her husband, Tommy—weren't really bothered.
She helps you skedaddle on your way to the living room, placing a basket of foods on the glass table.
“Stay here okay, I'm just going to get some ice.”
You eyebrows met, you didn't ask her for anything this afternoon, as you can remember.
“Hey, Maria? What's with the food? I'm eating healthy, okay? No need to worry!”
Lie. You ate two crunchwrap Supremes last night and absolutely downed that bag of chips. You just hoped that she doesn't check the trash bin.
She emerged with an ice pack in hand, icing your leg carefully, you wince every time your skin touches the ice pack.
She focused on your leg, a laser-like focus, it bothers you, she's not this focused unless—
“You're gonna hafta live alone now, I ain't here forever.” Maria says, not looking up from your leg.
“Yeah, I know. Are you- are you leaving?”
You ask, trying to capture her eyes but she doesn't budge.
Finally, she looks up at you, "Everybody leaves, sweet. Speaking of leaving, Tommy and I will, but 4 months is no harm.”
Your body jerks, and the injured leg hits Maria's hand a little too hard, “4 months?! Wha- Ow. Where are you going? Are you bringing Tommy and-” you couldn't continue your sentence as another throb hits.
“Don't be dramatic, of course I'm taking Tommy.”
“Whyyyyy.” you groan.
“Joel says we need a break. Gettin’ older now kid.” she taps her own back. “You're gonna be just fine here, Joel's sendin’ Ellie. You know Ellie, Joel's girl. But anyway, she's gonna be mindin’ the store while we're away.”
Your heart drops, the name that left Maria's mouth contained the nostalgic troubles of your childhood.
Oh, You know Ellie, she's the girl who visited Maria and Tommy years ago with her dad Joel, and she's trouble.
Not the typical kid trouble, where some kids might mess with you, tease you or even make you cry. It's worse than that, besides having ticked all the things in that list, Ellie added a lot more.
For her first week of visiting, she had a bow, the real one with arrows. You were playing at your spot at the opening of the forest when you spotted a swift white rabbit nearby, and you were intrigued. You slowly made your way to touch the cute little rabbit when an arrow came hurtling, you saw that rabbit die in your eyes. And as you looked back, you saw Ellie and that smug grin.
Not fully recovering from her first week of visit, the second week came.
Your mother was gone for the day, being the eldest daughter makes you in charge of the house.
When you woke up that morning, there's a small list on the table for things to buy. Easy.
But it's Ellie who doesn't make it easy.
35 minutes of shopping and she's still scanning your fifth product, she kept saying some facts about every food she scans.
“Tomatoes, you know they're a fruit?”
“Yes, Ellie I know.”
This repeats for every food or product that's in your basket
You were kind of thankful that there wasn't anyone around, or they would've been so pissed.
Not as pissed as you are an hour and two bags of groceries later, when she finally finished.
“You got coupons?” she raised her eyebrows mischievously.
You rolled your eyes “No. Do you take cards? My mom left this with the list so it's—”
“No. Sorry.”
You stared at her dumbfounded, looked to the direction where a card scanner is placed and then looked back at her.
“Really?”
“Mhm.”
You pulled a face, pointed at the scanner that’s a few centimeters away from her fingertips “What's this then?”
She shrugged, “I don't know how that works.”
“Really Ellie? You don't know how card transactions work after telling me for 5 minutes that bananas share their DNAs with us? Worst 5 minutes of my life by the way.”
“Not my fault NatGeo doesn't teach you how to deal with card transactions. Don't worry, mine too.”
You took a deep breath, “Fine, how much is it? Maybe I have cash around here.” You say, scrambling in your bag.
“89.95”
You stared at the crumpled two 10 dollar bills on your hand “Fuck.” you mutter, “Okay, um, Hold on. I'm just going to withdraw some cash- You guys have an ATM machine here right?”
Ellie nodded, then pointed at the bright red machine beside the doors.
…While forgetting to mention that there's no money in it.
You stomped on your way back, huffing and pumping your fists.
“God, did it ever occur to you to tell me that machine was empty?”
“I tried to tell you but you walked away too fast!”
You stopped, defeated. Thinking about how you're going to pay for this, you transfer your weight to your left foot.
“I’ll just tell Maria that you didn't have the cash. I know she'll understand.” Ellie says, her voice gentler than before.
But you don't let your guard down, “Wait— really? How do I know you're not joking?”
You say, crossing your arms.
Ellie gave the tiniest shrug, “Think of it as an apology. You know, for the hour of me yapping about shit.”
Your eyes collided with hers, “Okay, Thank you. And I actually didn't know.” You say, grabbing your grocery bags.
Ellie went outside the counter to help you with the other one. Sure, she might be equally annoying as a child who doesn't get their candy but she's gorgeous, 15, green eyed, auburn hair with a grin, and the rest of your worries fly away.
“Hey, um, what did you not know?” Ellie finally says when she reached your house's front porch, water dripped from her skin as the ice in the ice cream tub melted on the way.
“That Coke originally contained cocaine when you bagged my Diet Coke.”
She smirks, “Well now you know.”
“Hey, you okay?” the ice pack in Maria's hand snapped you back into reality.
The pain's there again.
“Yeah, I'm okay.” you nod.
Maria gets up with a faint difficulty. God, she is getting older. “I'm going now okay? Say goodbye tomorrow. We leave at 9.”
she says.
“Mhm, yes, of course. Thanks for the food, and the—” you gestured to your swollen, but carefully wrapped foot.
“Don't worry sweetheart. Get better okay?”
“Yes!” you called out.
“And no more Taco Bell!”
You pretended not to hear that last sentence.
Over the night, the pain and the throbbing had subsided. You woke up early to wish Maria and Tommy adieu, waving like a little kid.
Before she left, she had given you the keys to her house, and the store. Saying Ellie might be the one knocking on your door to ask for it. Additionally, she also told you not to open doors to strangers, until you look into the peephole, which you always forget.
You were blissfully folding your clothes but your mind can't help wondering when she is going to come.
It's not like you were waiting for her. No!
You had one objective: give the keys to her. That's it, but your heart has made a ton of objectives.
Wait for her, ask how she's doing, invite her over, give the keys, wish her a good night or good afternoon, then close the door, proceed to scream at your pillow for a full five minutes.
You were curious, how she looked after 5 years and how she's doing.
Your stomach growled. So you traipsed around the kitchen to look for food. Miraculously, there's some food, just not suitable for you. You went back to the couch, browsed on your phone, then ordered food.
Not more than five minutes later, the doorbell rang. A bit early for your food to arrive.
Ignoring Maria’s advice, you opened the door instantly, only to find that it was not the food that arrived.
It was Ellie. And she looks good.
Her gaze is straight, her mouth is slightly agape, her eyes scanned your face, a glint of surprise in her eyes.
“Hey.” she says, her voice raspy.
“Hi.” you answer, but it comes out as a sigh. Like a wave of relief splashes over your face to find out she's still the same, or is she?
Her auburn hair that was once put up in a ponytail now sits at the nape of her neck, a few strayed hairs framed her face. Her eyes that you swore got darker over time. Few specks of freckles are scattered on her face, and her lips that twitched to her infamous grin. A battered backpack hung loosely over her shoulder, from an angle, you can see her pins, her interests. Nevertheless, she's still the same girl you met half a decade ago, with the bow and arrow and a head filled with dozens of facts.
She tilts her head, “So, you gonna let me in what?” she waited by the door, her foot tapping against the wooden floors.
Yeah, she's back.
You roll your eyes, “Come in, Williams.” you say sarcastically, inching the door wider for her to usher in. Upon closing the door, you took a deep breath, gathering yourself and your thoughts.
Going back to the living room, you find her sitting on your couch, all cozy with her legs crossed, her backpack neglected on the floor.
You raised your eyebrows, “Wow, you comfy right there?”
She gives you a pleased nod, “Really comfy, thank you.” she says while stretching her legs and melting on the couch.
You give her a half scoff and a half laugh, “God, you haven't changed, you're still a dick.”
“Wow, you changed though. Didn't know you could use swear words now.”
You turn your back at her, rolling your eyes again as you went back to the kitchen island to find the keys to both the store and Maria's house for you to give to Ellie to hopefully leave your ass alone.
Only for them to be missing.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” you panicked, searching in the drawers to find the lost clause.
Suddenly, Ellie appears on your behind which causes you to shriek and hit your head on the previously opened cabinet.
“Ow- Fuck! What are you doing?”
“What are you doing?” She gestured at every opened drawers and cabinets.
You pinched the bridge of your nose. “I'm finding your stupid keys!”
Her eyebrows furrowed, “Why?”
“So you can leave and stop tormenting me!” your voice comes out a little higher than you intended to.
Instead of being offended, Ellie smirks.
You catched that smirk, leaving a line between your eyebrows. “What the fuck are you smiling about?”
She burst out laughing, “Jesus, but you need to calm down.” she says, pulling something out of her pocket before heading back to the living room.
You follow her, “This isn't funny Ellie, Maria trusted those keys with me.”
She stops in her tracks, turning her back to face you, a joint dangling between her lips. “Bad move by Maria for doing that.” she teases, pulling a lighter from her pocket to light it.
You cross your arms, rolling your eyes for the third time, “You can't smoke here!” you yell, watching her throw herself at the couch.
“Too late!” she replies back.
You groan, stomping your way back, “Ellie be serious for once.”
“I am serious!” she insists, a plume of smoke leaving her mouth.
Her sleeves are rolled up above her elbows, revealing a moth and fern tattoo. You stared at it.
She's the one raising her eyebrows now. “What?” she asks.
“You have a tattoo.” you deadpanned.
She chuckles, “Thanks for informing me.”
You pursed your lips together, “It's uh- really nice.”
She lets out a low whistle, “Damn, didn't expect that from your own mouth.”
And for the fourth time, you're sighing and rolling your eyes again. When your eyes latch on to her again, she's getting up now, hooking one strap of her backpack around her shoulders.
“Calm down for me okay? I got the keys, they were on the couch when I sat.”
You tip your head back, letting out a long sigh. “Five years later and they still didn't teach you to be compassionate.” you say, following her to the door.
Another chuckle left her Cupid's bow lips, “Good to see you too, Clums.” she says, reaching for the door.
“God, not that nickname..” you groan on your hands on your forehead, leaning on the door frame.
“Take it easy, Clums.” she teases one last time. You find yourself rolling your eyes for the fifth time this night as you watch her disappear.
You locked the door close, letting your back hit the door as you looked down to smile.
You already know the next four months will be excruciating.
March
Days elapsed: 2
Days remaining: 121
The first Sunday of March comes, it dawned bright morning with birds chirping and the sound of your alarm clock at 8 am.
It's time for your monthly store run at Miller's convenience, grocery and the like.
You dragged yourself to the bathroom, splashing your face with cold water, before cleansing it. Then it's time to take out your overnight curls, brushing them gently with your comb.
Your day doesn't start without you picking an outfit. You search at the paraphernalia of warm toned clothes to find your perfect fit today. It felt a little bit harder than usual, probably because Ellie's going to be there.
In the end, you settled on a cozy cardigan with your favourite pair of jeans.
You didn't bother with breakfast, planning to pick up some pastries at the bakery.
Then you're out the door, freezing in the weather outside, it’s March so a little cold is anticipated.
From afar, you can see the sign outside the store unopened.
“Oh, you've got to be kidding me.” you murmur. Of course it's not open, Ellie's probably asleep on her ass right now.
You groan, heading straight for Maria's house whilst searching for the spare key she gave you. When you reached her front door, you began to knock first.
“Ellie? Wake up!” your fists stomped at the door.
No answer. Spare key it is.
The key slides in perfectly, a click is heard upon opening it.
“Ellie?” you call out.
You search for her in the guest room first, cause that's where guests sleep right?
Wrong. You find her asleep in Maria and Tommy's bed. Her hair is tousled as the sunlight hits her face, freckles shining in the warm morning light.
You shrugged her, “Hey, Ellie, wake up.”
She lets out a groan.
You shrugged her again, longer this time.
“Hey, wake up—”
Her eyes flew open in shock as she yelped, “Dude, what are you doing here?!” she says, covering her body with a blanket.
“What's it look like? I'm waking you up so you can open the—”
“You look like a thief in pink!” she interrupts, looking you up and down.
“I don't care. Get your ass up to open the store.” you commanded.
Ellie looks up at you, a line creasing between her eyebrows. “What? It's 8:30.”
You cross your arms, shifting your weight on your right leg, “Maria opens it at 8.”
Ellie goes back to bed, pulls the blanket to her chest then says, “Maria's not here is she?”
You groan, “Oh come on! I need to buy food!”
“Buy it yourself!” Ellie's voice tears through the blanket.
You pull the blanket away too far, revealing Ellie in her boxers and her long sleeves. She sits up straight, pulling the blanket above her waist. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
You put your hand out to her face, “Keys, please.”
She groaned loudly as she scrambled half awake in the drawers. She gives you the keys angrily. “Happy?”
You smile at her, “Thankfully.”
She throws herself back to her bed as you leave the house.
It feels surreal opening the store like this. You and Maria are close, but your closeness hasn't gone to the point where she lets you open the store.
You take a shopping cart and your list. Heading to the vegetables aisle to pick up some fruits first, before proceeding to the other things listed on the list.
With only two items left on the list, you hear the bell ring, you look back to see Ellie on her flannel, half awake and half annoyed. You smirk as you turn to the dairy aisle.
When you reach the counter, a familiar feeling of deja vu washes over you.
“Fitting huh? Five years later and you're still standing there. I just hope I don't get the pop quiz on aubergines again.” you joke.
Ellie doesn't budge, she just scans your products, then she says “Hope you have enough cash. It's 9 and I really don't want you to go over and say that it's been five years and I still haven't learned how to do card transactions.”
You leave your mouth agape, “Do you still not know how to do card transactions?!”
“I'm messing with you, Maria told me that it's broken, so, cash only.”
You roll your eyes, “Fine, how much?”
“73.40”
You look at her, your eyebrows meeting, “What? I just bought a few items.”
Ellie leans on the screen, “Oh sorry, it's 43.40, early morning brain fog.” she points at her head.
You give her a fifty dollar bill, she gives you your change, and then puts your food in your bag.
“Thank you.” you say as you leave the counter, taking your food with you.
While finding the granola bar you just bought to eat it, you hear Ellie's footsteps following you to the door.
You stop, “What are you doing?”
“Going back home, my work here is done.”
You shook your head, “No it's not.”
“Yes, it is.” Ellie says. “I thought you just wanted to buy food?”
“Uh yes, then you go man the store now, cause that's what Maria sent you to do, right?”
She tips her head back like a kid, “Fine.” defeated, she struts back behind the counter.
With your hand on the handle, you yell “Pretty sure she sent you to torment me.”
It continues like this, you waking up at 8 in the morning to find her still sleeping, then waking her up to open the store for you, stomping and huffing on the way to the store. And everyday, she keys the padlock open as you wait—feigning impatience— struggling on the cold metal as she tries to keep her eyes awake.
And when she does open it, she hands you the keys angrily, her eyes low and eyebags forming underneath it. It's the cherry on top of your morning when she's really pissed at you for waking her up, and then you smile at her teasingly, hiding your laughter like a maniac as you watch her go back to the house, only to find her minutes later behind the counter, scanning your food and still refusing to accept your card.
April
Days elapsed: 31
Days remaining: 91
You are not getting tired of the monotony. Apparently, neither is Ellie.
April started with heavy and rainy Saturdays, mud staining your boots, and hurting the structural integrity of your house. Leakings started in the kitchen, pots surrounding the counters to catch the water. Miraculously, accidents didn’t happen.
It worsened over the days, you called Ellie at first, asking her to try and check what’s happening.
“Do I look like your roof handyman?” she says, before slamming the door shut.
“Tommy would’ve helped!” you yell against the door.
Ellie’s blunt refusal forced you to call a roofing company. You waited impatiently as the guy they sent took a look at your roof.
When he finally gets down, you ask “Is the roof okay? Or is it worse or is it—”
“Unfortunately, yes, it is worse. I’m afraid we're gonna have to replace some of the pipes on the roof.”
You sigh, putting your hands on your forehead, “Okay thanks. How long is it going to take?”
“Days, maybe. But that’s just an estimation ma’am.”
Days?! How are you going to survive for days without the solitude of your own home? It’s far worse because you don’t even have a place to sleep in.
No nearby motels are available, so you called Maria for help, asking if she knows any places or airbnb’s in town. Her answer? Stay with Ellie.
You hated her answer, but looking at the current situation of you and your house, you had no other options.
So, you packed your essentials, your clothes and accessories are now packed in a small suitcase, along with your backpack that contained your blankets, you looked like you’re going on a vacation.
The night entered quietly, moonlight shines over the dark porch, Ellie didn’t bother to open the porch lights so you were standing in darkness. Pacing over and over, debating on whether to leave or to just knock to get this over with.
The porch lights suddenly opened. Ellie stared at you halfway into your thoughts.
“Need anything?” she asks, leaning on the doorframe, arms crossed and an eyebrow raised. “You goin’ somewhere?”
There was a long pause. “Um. So do you remember the thing about the roof of my house?”
“Hold on let me think,” she pauses, then says “No.”
“Okay, basically, leaking on my roof got worse, so I need to get it repaired, I am getting it repaired—”
“Sorry, what is my problem here?” she interrupts.
You sigh, taking a deep breath before breaking the news, “I might need to stay with you for a few days.”
“What? Why?” Ellie frowned.
“Because of my freaking roof. Look, I had no other options, there are no nearby motels nor airbnb’s in this town. I called Maria for help and her first answer was to stay here.”
There was a moment of silence, just both of your annoyed faces staring at each other.
Finally, Ellie caved in, “Fine. Come in, I guess.”
You bid her a thank you.
She opens the door widely, one foot inside Maria's carpeted house and the smell of weed hits you immediately and you frown.
“God, it reeks here.” you waved a hand over your nose, then looked at Ellie, brows creased. “Are you- are you high?”
“Nope.” She looks back at the table behind her, prerolled blunts resting on it. She turns to you with a smirk on her face, “Why, you want one?”
You narrowed your eyes at her, “No, Ellie, I don't smoke.”
She scoffs, “That could be changed in a minute.”
“Ellie I really don't—”
“You say my name too often, babe. Like it that much?” She steps forward, closing the gap between you.
“Why are you counting then? Do you like it when I say your name?” you spat back.
Neither of you moved, you stood there for a while, you broke it off with a raised eyebrow that said ‘didn't think so’, before stepping back.
You walked off to the guest room, unpacked your stuff and went to bed. A little after, you could hear the faint sound of Pearl Jam coming from the living room.
Ellie awoke with the sound of her phone ringing. It was not her alarm, the one she usually sets at 8:00 to open the store for you. It was a phone call, and the name Maria is displayed across the screen.
She answered with a groan, “Hello?”
“Hey, Ellie. How are you doin’ there?”
The guests bedroom and the master bedroom are placed in a way that seemed aligned, Ellie took a second to peer at the guest room. The door is slightly open, giving her a glimpse of you in the morning scene.
“Fine.” Ellie finally answers.
“Okay, make sure y/n’s comfortable there okay?” Maria's voice crackled in the other line.
Ellie swears under her breath, low enough not to alert Maria on the phone, “I will.”
“Okay, Thank you Ellie. Goodbye.”
A beep remained. Ellie finds herself getting up to tidy. She cleans the pizza boxes out of the fridge, throws away the leftovers and cooks up breakfast.
She finds it weird, how she's letting her guard down for you, cooking breakfast for the both of you in all sorts. But she doesn't mind, she was an asshole last night.
The cacophony of the bacon and eggs on the pan makes her stomach growl, the toast clicks just in time to be burnt.
You emerged from the bedroom, you were awoken with the smell of eggs and burnt toast. Your morning hair sticks out in the most odd ways.
Ellie hears your footsteps and immediately greets you with a good morning.
“Wow, since when do you cook stuff?” you ask, a glass of orange juice in your hand.
“Maria called.” she says, flipping the pan as the eggs land perfectly.
Adjusting next to her side, you give her a nod of approval, “Oh, so that's why.”
She gives you a coy smirk and a light shrug, “Hm, maybe.”
You frowned, “What? You just really woke up this morning and thought you'd cook me breakfast?”
“Maybe, or maybe I was plotting to kill you and your eggs actually have poison.” she mutters, getting two plates and a fork, dividing the eggs and bacon for the both of you.
“Hm, delish.” you hummed as you watched the browned eggs hit the porcelain plate.
Ellie sits on the opposite side, she places your plate in front of you and you notice the bacon inequality.
You pout your lips, “How come you have two bacon and I only have one?”
She takes a bite of her egg, “I cooked it, I should be allowed to have two of it.”
You scoff, “Rude.”
Her fork scrapes on the porcelain plate, her eggs decreasing, “I could get used to this.”
“I won't.”
There was a lie in that sentence, because you could actually get used to this. A fortnight of it won't be that bad.
During the afternoon, you went back to your house to check on the unfinished project. You consult the engineer on board, and ask how it's going. He tells you it's going slow but steady. And you're fine with that. Even though Ellie makes a terrible roommate who leaves dishes in the sink and never puts anything back into their respective places so she leaves a trail on what she did, she replaces it by cooking food. It was acceptable, cooking was not your strong suit, and her dishes are good even though it pained you to admit. You just washed and cleaned the dishes to do your part.
Half of the week in and you two have a system already.
Ellie has taken up a job at the comic bookstore, you laughed when she told the news to you, saying that she's fit for it. So during the afternoons, when Ellie is gone, you have the house, all by yourself.
You don't go back to school for another two months, so to pass the time, you read books, occasionally leafing through Ellie's backpack to read her comic books. Surprisingly, you found them interesting.
One night after dinner, while she's smoking outside and you have just finished doing the dishes, you join her with a cup of tea.
Her chuckles lingered in the breeze, “You look like a grandma.”
You scoffed, “Oh fuck you.”
“Oh yeah? Is that a dare for yourself?” she shoots you a glare.
“You're annoying.”
“Have you met you?”
You roll your eyes, but deep inside, you’re baffled with her confidence, to flirt and don't mean anything by it, to casually hold her stares and don't mean anything by it.
Sometimes you question her sentences, sometimes you swear by it.
She sits besides you on the bench, your frilly night gown hits her flannel.
“Can you bring me a book? From the bookstore?” you ask, out of the blue.
She turns to you, forehead creased, “Why? Do you even read comic books?”
“Yeah, well, I went through your bag the other day, and I loved your Savage Starlight ones. Besides, I'm really bored, and I don't go back to school for another 2 months.”
She takes a drag of her cigarette and exhales the plumes into the air, “Fine, but I get dibs on Dr. Daniela.”
“Noooo, but she's my favourite!”
She puts both of her hands in the air “I called dibs.”
The night finds you both slumped against the hallway, the books scattered around the both of you, Ellie looks and checks every book with a frown on her face.
“The hell?” she mutters, her fast hands flipping each book, holding them close to her face because of the absence of light.
Looking up from a book you're currently reading, you ask “What?”
“My issue No.3 is missing!” she says, once again checking the books one by one, before turning around to look inside her bag.
“Oh! I think I took it.”
Ellie turns around, a mix of relief and annoyance tinted on her face, “Thief.”
May
Days elapsed: 91
Days remaining: 60
May commenced with early coffee mornings, but this was the last one.
The restoration of the pipes in your house turned weeks into a month.
You weren't really complaining, like in the past month, You and Ellie are like two wheels on a bike. You two had a system, a routine. One you'll miss.
You had memorized her routine. When the clock hits 8 am, she gets up begrudgingly. She goes to the bathroom to splash her face with water to awaken herself, moves to the kitchen with her sleeves rolled, tattoos on display, and then puts bread on the toaster, cracks up an egg to make herself an egg sandwich, before she rolls to the store.
Ellie only knows your routine during weekends, where you usually join her in minding the store.
There was a shift, maybe in the air, or the temperature, where the ice dropped down to welcome summer in gladly, or when the leaves turn greener and greener every day.
It wasn't in the way the ice bows down to the sun, or the way the leaves green, but between the two of you, where it was unlikely for the ice to bow down to the sun.
It happened one Saturday morning. You were in the storage room, checklist in hand to check the stock of the cereals. When you realized you were running low, you went straight outside to order some, when you went crashing directly to Ellie, who was behind a pile of boxes, boxes of cereals.
The very same boxes of cereals that put you in the emergency room at 10:30 in the morning.
The crash sent you stumbling sideways, right hand specifically.
When you landed on the floor, Ellie’s eyes were blown wide, like she just ran over a cat or something.
The buzz in the emergency room is deafening, there’s people everywhere, frantic people’s faces displayed, and the fast pace of the doctors.
A doctor came to you a moment later and asked how she can assist you, you were about to answer but Ellie spoke on your behalf.
“She– uhm, tripped, on a box of cereals, I was holding the boxes and she didn’t see me so she tripped and-”
You looked up to the doctor, holding your right hand gently, and smiled at her awkwardly. “I tripped and landed sideways, that's it.”
Ellie nodded her head profusely, listening to what the doctor was saying.
She said that you’ll need an x-ray in order for her to assess you more thoroughly, and sometime later, you were taken to a room to get your x-ray.
You were waiting outside, your free hand still holding the injured one like it’s going to fall off, watching Ellie struggle with the vending machine.
You stand up, walking up to her, she immediately notices you and that spark of worry shows in her face again.
“Watcha doin?” you ask, watching a single bead of sweat run down her jaw.
She sighs, “I was trying to get you food.” she gestured at the stuck peanut m&m’s on the machine.
You gave her a faint smile, “No thanks, I’m not hungry, come sit with me.” You signaled at the chairs, ones where you sat before.
She followed you, plopping on the cold steel chairs, she deflated as she sat.
With no hesitation, you made your way into her hands, your warm hand slipping into her cold ones, “Hey, don’t be worried. You didn’t hurt me, Els. I swear. It’s just me being me, okay? Remember, Clums?” you say, assurance in your voice.
Her hand became still inside yours, she looks away as she says, “Now I hate myself for giving you that nickname.”
You turn your head to her, hoping to catch that green eye of hers, you smiled while you did. “No, please, don’t be. It’s fitting,” you stared at the floor for a moment, chuckling when you remember the time when she gave you that nickname, “Do you still remember the day when you gave me that nickname?”
She shook her head gently, her hand fidgeting on your ring.
“No? Okay, I do though, God- I can’t forget that day.” you shook your head, laughing, “I was asked to buy tomato sauce at the store, list already evaporating in my sweaty hands, I can’t even see or read the name because it was so wet! And when I did find it, My-”
“Your hands slipped.” Ellie says, looking up to you while continuing the story correctly, her eyes twitched as she looked into yours.
“Yeah.” you sigh, “My hand slipped.” you look down at your hands, entangled into hers with a mist of sweat left in your hands.
You held your gaze, never averting it while she held hers too, you swore you felt a spark when her hand twitched, never leaving yours.
The doctor appeared in the corner, a clipboard on her hand and a concerned look on her face. Ellie was the one who stood up, “Is she gonna be okay?”
“I’m afraid not, but yes, she is going to be. Unfortunately, Miss Y/L/N, you have suffered a minor fracture, you're going to need a cast.”
Ellie nodded, “Okay, Thank you Doctor.”
A few moments later, you were in a room, a gentle orthopedic wrapping your arm up in a cast while Ellie watches, she's fascinated. While wrapping you up, the orthopedic makes small talk.
“So, how did we get into this situation?” she beamed at you, the orthopedic’s smile was so big it covered her eyes.
“Uh, I tripped, boxes and clumsiness aren't a good pair.” you say, shrugging as you look up to Ellie.
“Oh, I see! Well it was nice for your girlfriend to accompany you here. You two certainly make a great couple!”
You did not expect her to say that, but looking at how she is smiling at the both of you right now, you really had no choice but to play along.
Blood rushed into your cheeks as you answered, “Oh, Thank you.”
You looked up to Ellie again, her cheeks are the same as yours, blood pooling, gleaming in the sea of freckles as she gives you a cringed smile.
Once the orthopedic's finished, she taps her hand into your cast, “Okay! You're all done! Come back again after two weeks so we could see how it’s progressing and then we can switch to a fiberglass cast. After the fiberglass cast everything goes smoothly and your hand will be healed in no time, I’ll see you both in two weeks!” the cheery orthopedic said, before excusing herself to leave.
After going to the front desk to settle your payments, Ellie puts her hands around her as you two slid your way out the revolving doors.
“What are you doing?” You call her out, her hands around your waist. She looks at you, with a smug grin on her face.
“What?” she asks, the smug grin still intact and a small raised eyebrow, “Can’t a girlfriend hold her girlfriend?”
You let out a giggle, “Ellie, that was a joke. The doctor was just so nice and I didn’t want to crush her big ass smile.” You say, reaching for the door handle of the passenger seats while Ellie does the same.
She slid the keys in the ignition then a small screech of the car was heard. It was mid afternoon when you left the hospital, and Ellie’s first thought was to get food.
When the traffic lights turned into that familiar shade of green you’ve been waiting for a full five minutes, Ellie turns left instead of veering right. You peered at her “Where are we going?”
Without looking away from the road, Ellie answers “Food.”
Your stomach growled at the word. Right, you haven’t had food since nine in the morning, Ellie’s burnt toast and eggs are long gone in your stomach, and you haven’t noticed it but, you are really hungry.
She pulls up into an old diner, the ones with the jukeboxes, glossy red seats, the checkered floors, and the ones where you can get good milkshakes. Outside, there is a medium sized sign that reads, ‘Patty’s Diner’, embossed in bright neon colours.
“I used to come here all the time, whenever I visited. They have the best milkshakes and cheeseburgers here.” Ellie says as she beamed at you with a smile you’ve never seen before.
A bell rings as Ellie pushes the door open, the smell of potatoes instantly hits your nose. A woman—maybe in her mid-60’s—stares in shock as Ellie comes forward to the counter.
“Ellie?! Oh my god, you got so big now!” the curly headed woman says, charging to Ellie, pulling her into a tight hug.
Ellie happily accepts the hug, “Hey, Pat. Long time no see.”
The woman shrieks in joy, “I know, look at you! You're so grown now, tattoos and all.” the woman notices you behind Ellie, and immediately acknowledges you “And oh, you even brought your girl here, you go Ellie.” Patty—you presumed— teased Ellie with a wink.
The thought of two people thinking you and Ellie are dating is rather… unorthodox.
The possibility is open, wide open. Living with Ellie developed something inside of you. A warm, fuzzy feeling whenever you two are bantering on the kitchen table, whenever you two are arguing at the smallest things and the way she looks at you after all those arguments and banters.
You were afraid of acknowledging the feeling, you were terrified even when you're just keeping it to yourself.
But this day just made you realize that fuck, you were falling for her. For Ellie.
The girl who made you wait for 2 hours to bag your groceries, the girl who killed the first bunny you've ever seen, the girl who followed you around in every aisle of their store, the very girl who is pretending to be your girlfriend two hours later at the doctor. And yes, also the girl who woke up at 8am every morning just so you could shop freely, the same girl who cooked you burnt toast but amazing eggs, the same girl who brought you comic books so you could pass the time.
And Ellie just plays with it, “Yeah, we were hungry and decided to stop by.”
She is also the girl who made you question yourself more times than security questions could.
Patty seated you to the counter and brought out two milkshakes, chocolate ones. One sip of that and you were like transcending into heaven. She watched you sigh as you sipped again, the milkshake evaporating at your expense.
Ellie chuckles at your astonishment, “Good huh?”
You gulped, “Really, really good. Can I have like, 10 of these?”
That earned a laugh from Ellie, “I don’t know babe, but you might wanna pace yourself, you're gonna get full and we still have cheeseburgers.”
Babe, it’s maddening how she just calls you that casually.
“Right.” you answer, your free hand fiddling on the striped straw of the milkshake. You watch her as she chats with Patty, you catch yourself enjoying the act of watching her, of seeing her. The way her eyes have that glint of happiness that’s contagious, so contagious that you feel it every time you’re with her. You look at her like she shits rainbows and sunshines, like she’s your milkshake angel, and it’s so dumb.
Soon enough, the cheeseburgers arrived and it was tasty as Ellie says it would be. Halfway into your burger, Patty sits down, facing the both of you, she puts her palms against her face then asks, “So, how’d you lovebirds meet?”
The question caught you off guard and you choke, chewing halfway into your burger. Ellie slides your milkshake closer to your hands as she answers, “She’s the one I told you about, remember? When I was fifteen and when I first visited here, she’s–”
Patty’s mouth formed a vicious ‘o’ as her eyebrows raised, a puzzle clicked inside her brain, “Oh! Yes, I remember! Miss Clums?”
You drag a hand to your face, debating on whether you should pounce on Ellie or not.
Your brain goes back into recalling that memory, stopping at where your hand slipped.
The fragile glass of the tomato jar falls to the floor, tiny pieces of glass ricocheting throughout the aisle. It was on the floor, the boot of your jeans and in the battered converse that Ellie always wore.
You turned to Patty, who was laughing, “Oh, yes I remember. You going in here smelling like tomatoes and sweat, and looking like you just stepped into a crime scene the way your converse is covered in red.”
Ellie smirks as she sips into her milkshake, eyes on you, “It was a good day though, never seen someone so pretty bein’ embarrassed before.” she says, her knees bumping into you as she faces you.
Patty smiles between the two of you, “This might be the first time I’m kickin’ someone outta here for being so sweet.”
You both laughed.
The sun hiding beside the trees is a small indicator that it's time to go home, maybe the empty milkshake glasses and the discarded burger wrappers are one too.
When Patty sits down for a more deep chat, Ellie keeps up the act, your heart festering about how she keeps it so well.
How her eyes flickered to yours when she says a sentiment memory that didn't even happen, yet it feels real, it feels right.
In the car, you palmed your cheeks, it hurts after smiling all afternoon, it hurts after blushing all afternoon.
Ellie noticed the silence, it was only the radio that filled the void between the two of you, “Hey, you okay?” she asks, her eyes left the road for once to glance at you.
You stared at the window, your head slumped against it, “I'm fine.” you answer, but both of you know it's a lie.
From your peripheral vision, Ellie just nods and resumes the drive.
When you got home, none of you spoke, you just went off to your separate rooms.
You felt awful, you wanted to cry, sob and weep. You also felt angry, you wanted to ask her why.
Why do all that? Why not just tell the truth? Does it make you feel good knowing that it doesn't for me?
You pressed your cheeks against the soft pillow, and tried to cry, you just wanted to release your feelings but your body betrayed you.
Rip the band aid off. That's what your mom always tells you when you're too afraid to do something, rip the band aid off and get it over with.
So that's what you do, you rip the band aid off.
Outside, you find Ellie in her flannel. She has a mug on her hand, when she sees you, she acknowledges you with a swift smile.
“Hey, can't sleep either?”
You stepped outside fully, the midnight breeze hitting your skin made you shiver, your sleepwear doesn't exactly help. You walk slowly, the wooden floorboards creak at every step you take. You step in front of her, took a deep breath then asked,
“Can I ask you a question?” you breathe out raggedly.
She takes a sip of her coffee, licking her lips clean, “Sure.”
“Is it easy?” you say, looking straight into her eyes, your jaw locked, keeping your breaths slow and steady. Ellie pauses for a faint moment.
“Easy to what?”
“To say all those things to Patty earlier. Is it easy?”
She chuckles, “It's just a joke so yeah, it was easy.”
You bit your lip, nodding “Of course it is,” your voice broke, tears started residing in your eyes and your throat felt like it was wrapped in barbed wire, "Of course it's easy.” you mutter, looking down at your cup, you’re holding it tightly it might break. The poor tea cup bears the weight of your anger.
Ellie turns to you, her eyebrows knitted “Is there something wrong?”
“I think I could ask you that too, Ellie,” you spat, “But I think I've got a really clear answer, apparently there's none, cause you have it easy.”
The tone of your voice sits between anger and aggression, Ellie sees a vague look on your face, one that you've never seen before, she stares at you. “What?”
You couldn't stop it, your tears flowed through your face, glistening against the faint porch lights, your voice cracked as you spoke, “It's so unbelievable how easy you can lie like that! How you could stare at me and it could mean nothing— how our knees would bump and you'd feel nothing, how you hold my hand and don’t feel it, cause I do, I can feel it deep in my skin. How is it easy for you when it feels like hell to me?” you shook your head, grasping the hems of your shirt “It's so confusing how you could make me feel I'm in heaven yet you still make me wish I was in hell.” you took shuddering deep breaths, wiping the tears off your face with your cold, shaky hands, before running off inside.
Ellie follows you and grabs you with your wrists, her hands warm by holding her coffee cup, you look back at her, cheeks flushed and eyes red.
“I said all those things so easily because it was real.”
Your eyes met her grassy ones, lined with tears, her eyes aren't still, it searched and studied your face, her stares are so deep you feel it burning your skin.
Her hand slowly releases you as you turn back, eager to listen and your heart pounding so fast. “All of it was real. When I first saw you through that forest, I got so distracted by you that I shot that bunny instead of the tree. I think it was a miracle that I did it, and that's because you were there. But I felt so bad that I didn't finish my dinner that night. I didn't finish my dino nuggets— and I loved dino nuggets. I kept you in that store for two hours because I liked seeing you, I liked hearing your voice and how your face flushed whenever you got so angry,” she stopped to chuckle, it made you chuckle too even in your tears, “When I gave you that nickname, Clums. I wasn't even mad that my shoes were fucked up, or when Maria got mad at me because I told her that I was the one at fault not you, I didn't get upset, I was actually happy because we had an interaction that day, I called you Clums and your face turned like the shade of the tomato on the floor.”
She paused for a moment, taking a deep breath as she unravelled more, she sniffled as she continued, “I talked to Joel about you, you know. And you know what he told me that night?” she looks at you, then resumes “He told me that he never seen me that happy before, and he was glad that I made a friend. Fuck he— he didn't know that I missed that friend when I left and I fell in love with that friend when I came back.”
She steps forward, and she's only inches away from your skin. Slowly, she pushes a stray hair to your ear, then whispers, “So to answer your question, yes, it was easy. Because I know to myself that I didn't lie.” She cups your jaw, wiping the tears that run down your face, pulling you in slowly for a kiss.
When you walked out that door earlier, you didn't anticipate this, you just wanted an answer, and you have been given one. In the deep valleys of her neck, her murmurs in between kisses, and just how she holds you close as she swallows you whole, yes, you found your answer, and it was here all along.
You two stumbled down through the door as she pushed you in, her lips never left yours.
The back of your knees hit the couch as you fell into it, she crawled on top of you, hand roaming everywhere. She pulls away for a second, looking at you as blood remains in your cheeks, sweat lined in your brows and panting breaths. You looked like a fucking masterpiece.
“Can I-”
“Yes, please. God, I need you, I need you so bad.” you breathe out, tipping your head back.
Ellie plants more kisses in your lips, savouring every moan that leaves your mouth, her kisses going down to your neck, you reveling in pleasure as she stays there for a moment. She strips your nightwear off, “As much as I love seeing you in that, I'm gonna have to take it off.” She unbuttons it slowly, her warm breaths against your skin makes your nipples go hard, “This okay?” she asks as she runs her thumb over it, you let out a satisfied moan. “Yes, that's it, let me hear you, pretty girl.”
She runs her tongue over your sensitive nipples, warm saliva plastered all over it, she looks up at you with half lidded eyes. “Fuck, you taste so sweet.”
She doesn't go fast, she goes slow and takes her time with it, savouring every minute and every second she's like this with you.
While she works on your chest, you tug on her flannel, she stops on what she's doing and then asks “What's wrong?”
“Off, please.” you say, tugging more on her flannel, begging to see more of her, “Be my guest, baby.”
You worked on the buttons with a pace, taking it all off within seconds, you stared at the body before you. Her biceps are toned as well as her abs, you let your hand roam through it as Ellie gives you a sly smirk, “Like what you see?”
You returned it with a kiss, more deep and filled with longing and a crave that can't be satisfied.
She pulls your silk underpants off with an ease, your wetness creates a spot of dampness in your cotton panties, Ellie hooks her thumb into it as she slides it down slowly, “So wet for me, hm.”
And at last, you were naked, she knelt between your legs like your an altar, you looked at Ellie with a mischievous stare, “Fuck, you're so gorgeous, please tell me I can touch you, please.” she whined.
You answer with a light nod, and apparently that's all it takes. What started as slow transitions into a much faster pace. Now, Ellie doesn't waste time, she licks your clit slowly, your juices staining her face as she immersed herself in it. She draws little circles in your clit, her tongue occasionally dipping in your sopping hole. Her tongue is relentless and it made you lose your mind when she pushes a finger inside you. “Ellie- fuck, ah.”
Her finger pushes soft thrusts in, her hand curling just right to reach that spot, lewd sounds filled every corner of the room. For Ellie, your moans are like a tune to her ears, one that keeps her going and puts you on the edge.
“Fuck- I dreamt of this, I can do this all night, I could trace every bit of this on paper and remember it forever.”
“Jesus, do you ever shut up?” You rolled your eyes.
You were close, so close, Ellie can feel it as your walls clenched around her fingers, “Fuck– Ellie, I'm so close-”
“I know baby, I know, I can feel you, you're doing so great taking me like this.”
When she pushed another finger in, you just crashed. Your orgasm crashed like waves all over your body as you let out a long guttural moan that you didn't even know you could do, your back arched freely as Ellie helped you ride through it, her hand stayed atop of your thighs as it trembled.
“That was fucking amazing.” you say in between pants, looking down at her who looked happy between your thighs.
“You're fuckin’ amazing.” she says as she licks you clean, drinking all of your release, planting soft kisses in your thighs before putting your clothes back gently.
She plops down besides you pulling you in for another kiss, before dragging you into the bedroom, where you slept side by side, skin to skin. For a fleeting moment, you weren't afraid of anything with Ellie right behind your side.
July
Days Elapsed: 121
Days Remaining: 30
July brought a bittersweet feeling for you. Maria and Tommy were coming back, which meant Ellie was the one to leave now.
The sight of her leaving made your heart ache, you didn’t want her to leave, but that just sounds selfish.
So to numb any anticipated feeling of loneliness you'll soon face, you intended to spend every second with Ellie as much as possible.
In the store—where it was booming recently, a wave of regulars coming in everyday— while you stay by her side, smiling as she rings up food while having small talk with the customer. In the store, where you cling to her arms as she talks while restocking food in the sauce aisle.
In your house, as you stood by her side while she whips up an amazing dinner for both of you—which you immediately thank her as you both headed for the bedroom.
In the bedroom, where you find out her favourite place is between your legs and you're not complaining about it.
In the shower, where your skin clung to hers, a hazy fog appeared in the mirror as you kissed her mindlessly while she brushed her teeth.
In the kitchen during the mornings, where you washed the dishes as she left a trail of kisses on your neck up to your face.
“Ellie!” you exclaimed, “You're distracting me!”
“I know!” she giggled as she found your lips through the splashes of water you gave.
Or during the nights, where you ran out of topics to discuss, so you just trauma dumped.
“What's up with your family?” Ellie asked one evening as you two laid on the bed.
“What do you mean?” you turn to her, eyebrows knitted as you trace the freckles on her collarbone.
“You’re all alone in that house… Where's your Mom? your sisters? How about your Dad?”
You took a deep breath before answering “My mom.. she's in another state, working, as always. My sisters… They're in school, with my Mom. My Dad…” you pursed your lips, “is another boring story.”
Ellie shifts, she places her hand on your hair, stroking it gently as she looks at you “I’m here to listen babe.”
You give her an acknowledgement nod, “Okay, let see," you took another, staggering deep breath “He left us when I was five, me, my sisters and my mom. I used to comfort my mother when he left, she cried and cried, and I just sat there and listened to her, my heart ached so much.. and then she would tell me, ‘Hon, you find a man that'll be your post during hard times.’ she would tell me, so I grew up despising my father. And when I was twelve, boys would flock to my lunch table, send me notes in my locker, or pass me notes during classes. I rejected them all because they didn't feel like they were the one.”
You haven't realized that your tears were falling already, it was Ellie's hand who reached to wipe it as you talked again.
“Then you came, you and your green eyes with that grin. God, but I hated you, when you shot that bunny in the forest, or when you made me wait for two hours for my groceries. But overtime, it wasn't just hatred that made my face all red, it was the feeling I felt for the very first time in my life where you tried to fight me off from getting the last box of Cheerios from that high shelf, where our hands brushed and my body felt electric, I thought that it was the feeling that my aunts told me about when you hold a boy's hand for the first time and when you feel that spark.. he's the one.” you paused as you tried to store the tears into your throat as you looked her in the eye, “It was true, Ellie, I felt that spark.. the spark that I was searching for in other people's hand, not knowing it could only be felt in yours. You're like.. lighter fluid, you know?”
Ellie gave you a light chuckle, tears residing in her eyes, “Piss off.”
“I'm serious! You awakened something inside me that I didn't even know was there.”
“Oh, so like, your lesbian awakening?”
You laughed. “Kind of? But in all seriousness, the spark faltered when you left, but now it's shining ever so brightly.” You smiled at her before giving her a gentle peck, putting strayed hairs behind her ears.
She inched closer, pulling you into her body as she wrapped you up into a tight hug, she was silent for a moment, then she whispered “Can I eat you out now?”
You pulled back in disbelief, your mouth slightly open as you gave her a scoff, “Ellie! I literally just had trauma dumped on you and your response is ‘can I eat you out now?’”
“What?! It just happens to be my form of emotional support!” she retorts.
You rolled your eyes, “Fine.” you say as you let her kiss your neck mindlessly before trailing down to your thighs before the night ended.
In the morning during the last day of July, you two were up just before the sun dawned.
Tommy and Maria will arrive today, and Ellie also leaves today. For the first hour of packing, neither of you talked, probably because of the fact that when you talk, tears would definitely leave your eyes too.
Once you've finished, Ellie breaks the silence.
“So,” she gives the duffel bag a pat, “Ready to leave? Oh-”
You ran sobbing before collapsing into her arms, tears streaming down your eyes before landing on her cashmere sweater. Ellie takes you in gently as she brushes your hair, placing her chin on your head as she lets you get all your emotions out.
“Hey, hey, it's okay, I'll come back, babe. I promise.” she says as she consoled you in her arms.
“Why'd you have to leave? Can't you just stay here?” you say in between weeps.
“I know, I'm sorry. Believe me, it's the worst decision to make.”
You sniffled, wiping your tears away. You gulped as you gathered your hairs into a bun before giving her a nod.
A blue car stops on your front porch, its brake clutching, creating a shrieking sound as it stops fully. The sound of it catches your attention, you hurried to the door.
As you opened it, Tommy and Maria glowed in the morning light as they took their suitcases out the back.
Your gloomy mood was replaced with a happy one as you ran towards Maria and Tommy, pulling them both for a hug.
“Oh- hey, kiddo.” Tommy pats you on your shoulders as he was taken aback with your sudden hug.
“Hey there, sweetheart.” Maria's voice calms you down, as you melt even more into the hug.
When you pulled back, you saw Ellie standing on the porch and your sadness set in again. You thought of Ellie as a strong girl, as she gives you a smile from afar but you know it pained her to leave too.
“Are your guys doing some lovey dovey telepathy thing?” Maria teases out of nowhere, “Come on now, Joel's waitin’”
Right. Joel's waiting. You watched Ellie as she walked towards the car, Ellie greets Maria and Tommy with a cheek kiss, while Maria gives her a confused look.
“What's with the bags, Els? You going somewhere?”
Ellie stopped in her tracks, “Yeah? I'm- going home?”
Maria laughed, “Oh, honey. Joel's just waiting for you to greet him! Gosh, haven't he told you? He's going to stay here with us now.”
And then, Joel steps out of the car with a brown scruffy jacket on him and a wide smile.
“Hey, sorry you packed. I wanted it to be a surprise.”
In response, Ellie drops her bags before hugging Joel, “Thanks, Joel.”
“Someone eavesdropped on the phone.” Tommy spoke.
A little while after you and Ellie got together , Maria checked in—and Maria being the absolute angel she is, you couldn't lie to her—so you told her, about you and Ellie.
She sounded ecstatic on the phone, saying that she had already predicted that it would happen.
So maybe Joel heard it too, he heard how big you love her.
The sadness faded away into the air within you and your new found family. You felt Ellie's hand around your waist as she hugged you from the back, her lips resting on its favourite spot, your neck.
Once again, when you face her, your face is all red and glowing, “So, you're staying..”
“I'm staying. And I'm never going to leave again.”
And now, you truly believe her.
a/n : ending and the smut was rushheddd idk what's wrong with me. thanks for reading !! c:
ᛝ hi ! my name is mauve (yes like the colour) rock lesbian diva ~
ꔠ . I'm 21 so minors kindly don't interact.
ꔠ . I love listening to rock and nu metal music. Some of my fav bands include Deftones , Linkin Park , Pierce the Veil , Radiohead , and Paramore.
ꔠ . I love to read books , pop me a book recos in my inbox ! gay and classic stuff onli c;
ꔠ . for my safety and privacy concerns , I will not disclose my location and my real name. writing is my hobby and I do not wish to bring personal things here. the internet can be a scary place especially for my fellow writers here.
ꔠ . abolish ICE , free gaza , free sudan !
ꔠ . do not interact : men , minors , zionist , MAGA’s , trump supporters , joellie shippers.
ꔠ . this blog is AI free , FUCK AI ! USE Y'ALL'S BRAIN.
ꔠ . i might be inactive most of the time , you can find me in ao3 reading doomed yuri ><
ꔠ . writings 𓍯𓂃
ꔠ . current works : the store next door — go read !
ꔠ . will mostly write about ellie williams and abby anderson.
ꔠ . find me at ao3 !
ꔠ . some of my works will contain nsfw and smut.
ꔠ . reblogs and likes are deeply appreciated c:
ꔠ . I'm a veeeerryyy slow writer, good things takes time. (an excuse for school and my ADHD yes I'm on medication.)
ꔠ . will not write for any of the following. non-con , rape , pet play , large age gaps , amab!reader , male reader, anything involving minors.
ꔠ . mind the content warnings !
ꔠ . english is not my first language , I will make typos , wrong spellings and grammatical errors on my fics. I'm still starting out as a writer after many years so I take constructive criticism !
ꔠ . interacting 𓍯𓂃
ꔠ . again, this is a 18+ blog , minors please please don't interact.
ꔠ . my inbox is always open ! feel free to yap there or if you have any questions , I will tend to them !
ꔠ . I don't take requests at the moment , I have a life outside tumblr and responsibilities. But look out ! I might open them during the summer c;
ꔠ . if you want to be moots , don't hesitate to ask ! send me an ask or message me privately !
Ever since you were kids, you had known Ellie was so much into space, it kinda shows. Her backpack? Tons of space pins, and a NASA logo, of course. Your lunch topic? Space, black holes, galaxies, supernovas, anything out of this world. Her clothes? Almost all of it had a NASA logo in it, iron patched. If not all with logos, probably contained all spacey stuff and she’d always wear a flannel over it. Her favourite movie? Interstellar. You remember finishing the movie in the theaters—first day of showing of course, Ellie will never dare to miss it— you're all misty and cold, but she’s still yammering about how it was all scientifically accurate and how beautifully it is made, she said something more, but you tuned it out because you were busy looking at her face and admire how pretty she looks while sounding all nerdy. You liked it whenever she was talking about it, it always gave you extra knowledge, so much that you can take astronomy too, but it’s just not your calling. And always, while you’re busy looking at her face while she’s talking, she’d stop, tilt her head and ask,
“Am I boring you?” in a hushed manner.
You'd always say “Never.”, not because you feel you're obligated to say that as her girlfriend, but simply because you like seeing her like that, that meant a lot to you seeing as Ellie never talks to someone unless you're in the room, so you know that you make her feel heard, you make her feel a lot of things but most especially you make her feel important.
2 years in, as Seniors. She applied for an internship at NASA, her lifelong dream, because she would never stop talking about how cool it is to work there, you once told her that you're convinced that she wants to marry her future job at NASA instead, but she took the joke seriously and got upset for a minute because she told you that that's not happening, because she still wants to marry you, joking that “Williams” is much more suitable than your last name.
The day she told you that she'd applied for it, she was so nervous all day. Feet tapping, nail digging in the denim of her jeans, her eyes always avoiding yours.
You asked her in the library later that day, “You okay babe?” your eyes searching her face for answers.
She just gave you a quick smile and went back from the book she was reading, her hands tapping the lacquered surface of the desk. You stopped her busy hand by holding it, clasping your way in.
“Is there something you're not telling me?” You said, your smile transforming into a grin.
She slumped forward, hiding her silly laugh unsuccessfully before muttering a “No.”
“Are you sure?” Your tone, this time, is straightforward teasing her. “You're a veeerryy bad liar, Els.”
She surrendered, hands up in the air, her smile not hiding this time. “Fine, fine.”
“So what is it?” You said, waiting for an answer like an eager puppy.
“I applied for a NASA internship.” she said, cringing at herself.
You gave her a half scoff, half chuckle, “Els, are you kidding me? That's amazing! Why didn't you tell me any sooner?” You said, switching your seat to her side so you can give her a hug.
“Well because I've wanted it for a really really long time so I wanted to surprise you,”
“I'm sensing there's a but ?”
“I thought maybe-” Ellie hesitated for a second, “Maybe I wouldn't get in.” She said, in a low voice, with a sense of doubt.
You faced her, putting your hand on your shoulders. “Are you kidding me right now? Els, you have the highest grade in this whole school right now. You're graduating valedictorian for God's sake! You have more knowledge about astronomy than all the people in this room combined. No one is ever qualified for that position except you, okay?”
Ellie nodded. “Mm. Okay.”
“If NASA isn't going to accept you, I swear to Sappho I'm flying to Washington and storm them.”
That earned a laugh from her, “You're kidding.”
“I'm most certainly not!” you gasped.
“You're a lunatic.”
You gave a relaxed sigh. “I'm very much aware.”
The morning when she received her letter, she was sleeping beside you. In her room, there are a handful of space posters and a random picture of Marie Curie. But now, she's standing beside the bed, phone in her hand while she’s pacing like a maniac. You caught a glimpse of her calendar, some of the past days were marked cross with a red marker, leaving the present day unmarked. Oh, of course, how could you forget? Today was the day Ellie will receive her letter from NASA, hence the pacing and her laptop open on the desk.
“Hey” you called out softly under the covers. Her ears perked up when she heard your voice, then she immediately hopped back to bed and sunk her head on the soft valleys of your neck.
“I’m so scared.” she says. You felt a wet drop on your neck.
“Hey, hey, hey” you immediately sat up straight and cupped her face, you studied her face for a bit, her cheeks lined with tears and flushed, more tears arrived at her face.
“You’re gonna do it. Okay? I believe in you so much, and I will always do.” you assured her and wiped her tears away with the sleeves of your sweater.
“Okay.” she smiled as she nodded. “I'm going to check.” She stood up, wiped her eyes and went back to her desk. She looked back at you. Her eyes pleaded.
So you stood up, grabbed a chair and sat beside her. You held her hand as she squeezed it tightly while waiting for her email to refresh.
An email popped out, which made her jump a little. It was the mail.
“Okay.” You breathed out. “You ready?”
She licked her lips before biting them. “I think so.” You just nodded.
Her hand trembled as she moved the cursor, so you held her hand, along with the cursor and clicked the email.
“Okay. Read it slowly and loudly.” she says, closing her eyes and gripping much more harder.
You obliged. “Dear Miss Williams. We are-” you stopped.
“Why’d you stop?” She asks, hovering her hands over the screen, eyes wide.
“Read it, baby.” you say, your eyes glimmering in proudness while the deathly grip of hers softened.
Ellie took a deep breath. Then she began to read.
“Dear Miss Williams, We are-” her voice broke, “pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to the Pathways Internship.” she says, her eyes glassy, she looked at you with pure and genuine happiness.
You reached out to wrap her in a warm hug “C’mere baby, I am so so proud of you.”
And you guys just sat there for a beat, your arms all tangled around each other's, the laptop still brimming with light and the email open, just taking it all in.
“Fuck, is this really real?” she said, laughing with her hands covering her face. “Slap me right fucking now babe. I’m not kidding.”
You raised your eyebrows at her, “Are you joking?” you asked, laughing your socks off.
“I’m not kidding! Slap me or else I’m banging my head onto this desk.”
You smiled at her, cupping her face warm. “I swear to you Ellie, this is not a dream, you are not dreaming, okay? This is happening for reaaalllll.” you shook her, hoping to knock some sense into her.
“The only thing that’s a dream here is you.” you say quietly, kissing her temples.
! : hi !! kind of disappeared but I'm back for fluffbruary :3
synopsis: Your confidence is over the top before you graduated, with a queen bee status and a spot at the top of the social hierarchy, no one bats an eye on your path. But everything crumbles down when you feel disregarded at the new school gala, everyone seems to not know who you are. Thankfully, Abby comes to save the day.
Wealthy, popular, Top of your class, and a face too good for the runway. You had it all, the status, the money, maybe a bit of nepotism on it. Constance was a great school, you've made a lot of friends, and left a mark on the school's history.
Columbia is a little bit different.
There's people, plenty of people. But you don't know any of them. Apparently, they didn't know you either. Suddenly, the girl who's lunch table is nevery empty, always abuzz with people, is sitting at a bar, alone with the accompaniment of your martini. You thought you could fix it by yourself, trying to talk to some of the people who comes at the bar for a refill, but it always ended the same. A quick, forced smile, or if they're atleast kind, they would offer a small nod.
You ran from the bar to the bathroom, practically sprinting because of the sore your Louboutin heels, sobbing while frantically searching for the Abby's name on your phone.
You've found it just in time you hit the first cubicle, it's ringing on your lap.
"Hello?" Abby's voice crackled in the other line.
"Abby? It's me, where are you?" you say, your voice breaking.
"I'm on my way home sweetheart, are you okay?"
Were you okay? "Im- can you just get here please? I'm at Columbia, for the gala. Please, I really need you."
Without hesitation, you could hear Abby mutter to her driver to turn around.
"I'm on my way."
Abby appeared not more than five minutes after your frantic call. She found you on the bar, mascara smudged and lipstick imprinted on your Martini glass. Tears still prickled on your face.
Abby cups them gently. "Hey hey, what happened?"
You pout. "Columbia happened. Nobody knows me here."
Abby scoffs, "You're kidding."
"No Abby, you don't understand. You're making fun of me."
"No, I do understand, please let me help."
"No Abby, You don't understand!" Your voice is a little louder than you intended to "This isn't Constance anymore! Nobody cares about social hierarchy! Nobody cares that I'm Y/N Y/L/N!"
Abby blinked, "Okay. Calm down."
"You don't have to insult me like this."
"I'm insulting you?"
"Yes, you are. You calling me to go here just proved it. You're like telling me that I'm so much easier to win over than these rich, control freak, psycho people."
You went silent for a moment.
"You are Y/N Y/L/N. You can do so much better than this." she grazed her right hand through your cheek, the one where the tears fell.
"The next time you forget that you're Y/N Y/L/N," she inches closer and closer "Remember that I'm Abby Anderson, and I love you."
Abby wholeheartedly gave you one of the greatest kiss of your life, so soft, filled with assurance and trust. When you pull back, you were back to smiling again. "Okay." you whisper.
And then she was gone, the bar felt empty without her.
But just when you were about to leave, a photographer stepped up.
"Ma'am excuse me, can I take your picture?"
You immediately stopped, "What, why?"
"Aren't you Y/N Y/L/N?"
You smiled, "Yeah. I guess I am."
So you happily posed for his picture, putting your hand on your hips, little pout here and there. You felt seen again.
When he stopped capturing, he gave you a quick thank you before disappearing outside. But as you settled in the couch that faced the window, you saw the same photographer who took your pictures, run back to a familiar vehicle.
synopsis : the aftermath of a new years party, and a face that emerged from the light after a few years behind. sunken sorrows and deep cut apologies, all poured to leave with the year behind
contents: childhood best friend ellie whom you haven't seen in a while, arguments, alcohol, languages, bit of trauma dropping, resolving unresolved issues, dialogue heavy
a/n: happy new yuriiii !!! 😜😜😜
The city lights were blinding, it scoured through your whole apartment, looking for a skin to stick on.
The light found one.
The party ended an hour ago. You have just cracked open another bottle of wine, the cold air of the refrigerator made the hair on your skin stand up. You sat down on the kitchen counter, looking at the mess some of your friends made. Polaroids on the floor, empty poppers and the thin air of loneliness was scattered around. A shadow was formed around the corner, your eye caught that green eyes, that green eyes that lingers.
“What are you still doing here?” you ask, the tone of your voice low. The shadow emerged from the low part of the sofa.
It’s Ellie. You took a deep breath, you couldn’t even remember if you had invited her or not, or one of your friends came with her. But either way, you couldn’t gather your feelings to whether hate her because she’s here, or atleast, love her a little because she stayed.
The shadow emerged, the light getting caught on her auburn hair, on her pale face scattered with her freckles, the face that gave you a sense of home, but it also gave you war flashbacks.
“I was waiting for you.”
You scoff “Waiting? For me? Wow. Didn't know you still joke, Williams.”
“Didn't know you'd move on that fast.” Ellie spat back.
“Fast? Is six fucking years fast?! Do you not have a clock on whatever shit hole you've been Ellie?!”
You were met by silence “Yeah, didn't think so.” You nod your head in disbelief, taking a gulp out of your wine before standing up to get some more “You know where the door is.”
“I'm sorry.”
You stop, you look back at her, her face pivoted on the floor before she looks back at you, green eyes watery.
“I'm sorry because I'm such a coward. I'm sorry because I left. I-I’m sorry because I didn't call, I could go on for decades about how many things I'm sorry for but, I'm really fucking sorry that I left. I'm sorry that I left you alone. Please, don't push me away.”
By the time she was finished, you hadn't noticed your tears slipped from your eyes. You rush towards her, taking her into your arms. Her familiar smell instantly hits you and you melt. She melted too, and you two stood there for awhile, it almost feels like your souls were merging back together, all those nights that felt empty, lonely, were replaced by the familiar touch of her skin against you. All those times your lips were cracked, was all replaced by putting yours around hers. The way her skins sticks to yours, the familiar warmth making up for lost time. Suddenly, for the first time in a while, your heart's walls were brought down, your guards flourished. Your long lost love was in your arms again.
You cried into her shoulders for what seemed like an eternity, tears streaming like waterfalls, her own hoodie was wet, courtesy of your tears.
“Please don't ever leave me again, please don't be a stranger whose laugh I can recognize within a five mile radius.”
You can feel her grin, “Was that a compliment?” You nod.
She brushes your hair, in the pattern you always liked, tracing lazy circles around your ears, how she did years before.
You look up, your tears dried away, leaving a small flush around your eyes and cheek, Ellie cups it eagerly. “I haven't heard an answer yet.” You demanded.
She stared into your eyes, before she mutters “Never. I am never-”
She stops to lean in closer to your face, “Ever” Kiss “Leaving” Kiss “You” Kiss again, but this time, she presses her lips onto yours.
“Again.” Finally, her warm lip presses into your forehead, it felt perfectly fit, like her Cupid's bow lips were moulded to be with your forehead, feeling like home.
The night sunk into the morning slowly, the sun peeking its way through the blinds, and again, looking for a skin to touch, but this time, it's you and Ellie's. Intertwined, sewn together, never ever leaving each other.
And when you open your eyes, your already staring into hers, her eyes filled with lush meadows and evergreen forests. Her lips part, just in time to say
