It's Getting Personal

Stuff I'm Passionate About

[itsgettingpersoval]

Coming Out

So. I’m bisexual and noviromantic. I go to this group thing and we got on the topic of being LGBT. I had wanted to come out as bi for the LONGEST time but never felt like it was the right time or had all the right words to describe it. I also wasn’t entirely sure of how I would be received, as the subject hadn’t really been discussed in depth with this group and the members had changed enough that I wasn’t sure if the group would be stable enough for me to feel comfortable enough to come out. That changed last week when one of my group mates came out, in a way. I don’t remember what I said, but another group mate asked if I was gay; I said no, not really/not technically/something like that. Then, this week, the same group mate who asked if I was gay came out. Note, this isn’t the person who came out initially. It spurred almost an hour and a half of conversation about being LGBT, one in which every member of the group-myself included-came out. Even one of our leaders came out when asked about their identity. The group mate who came out last week was crying in relief at how much support was flowing in that group. 

So, I decided to come out. It was perfect timing, but boy was I nervous. I’d pulled up my Tumblr on my laptop that I bring like every time I go to the group and was showing some of the tags-LGBT & bisexual, namely. So I searched the bi flag and pulled up a pic that read Bi and Proud to use so I didn’t have to use my words to come out. The subtopic changed quickly enough that I clicked away from the pic until the group leader sitting next to me asked if I wanted to share the pic. I did. It took me a minute to gather the courage to do it, with a little help from the group leader. They kept telling me I didn’t have to and that there was no pressure. But I wanted to. I needed to come out because I had been dancing around the topic for well over a year. I closed my eyes when I turned the computer screen around; I was too afraid of their reactions. 

Seeing that pic saying bi and proud changed nothing. In fact, it made them proud of me for being so willingly open about my sexuality. I had been providing answers and chiming in with useful information the whole night. But I was shaking and nervous. My face felt so hot my skin felt like it was aflame. The group mate who initially came out was crying again. One group member-neither of the ones who’d come out at this point-had been very quiet. It’s in his nature. So when we (finally) got to him (we tend to collectively have squirrel brain and go on tangents way too often), I swear he came out too. It was a shock to my system, which was already flooded with adrenaline and nerves, so I’m not too sure that I understood him correctly. 

I talked for like 20 minutes in the parking lot with the person who first came out after we left the group. We both felt so free, so energized, like weights had been lifted off our shoulders/chests. I hugged him like 3 different times because it was too much and we were pretty much soaring on Cloud 9 and it was almost too much for my group mate. We also talked via text and Snapchat for like 2.5 hours after we got home. I can’t explain how good it feels to come out and be validated and to not be the only one who came out. I feel like we created irreversible bonds tonight. Ones we’ll never lose so easily. And when the last guy came out (the one that’s very quiet) I jumped back my chair diagonally away from him and went, “Shocker!” (he was sitting next to me and had I not been so nervous it would have been a shock because he’d like never share w/o prompting. 

We unofficially became an LGBT group tonight. That feels so good. I don’t have to dance around the gender of a potential partner-the pronoun they could mean male, female, or otherwise-since everyone knows I’m into more than one gender (hello, bisexuality). It’s been a really long day. I should get some sleep, but I don’t want to leave the Cloud 9 of the real world that I’ve taken residence on for the Cloud 9 of the dream world because I’m terrified I’ll wake up and the high of coming out and being well-received will be but a fleeting memory like it was the morning after I came out the last time (and it was a while ago, so I forgot what this feels like). 

[the-asocial-butterfly]

Today, I woke up to something amazing:

Lilly Singh came out to the world as bisexual. Which is so, so amazing.

Obviously, she received a lot of love and support from the internet. But another of the most common replies she received was how they “always knew” and how “obvious” it was and how they had “seen it coming for the longest time”.

While I really appreciate all this acknowledgement and the fact that she was accepted nonetheless – as a bisexual woman myself – I cannot stress enough what it really means to come out.

Coming out is a result of a journey that involves a lot of soul-searching, self-acceptance, and finally feeling safe – physically, psychologically, emotionally – with oneself and the people one chooses to come out to.

So, if any person comes out to you, it is because they have been able to accept themself and have begun to live their truth freely, and doing so without the fear of judgement, prejudice, discrimination, and even violence.

It is much less about you coming to know that they’re not straight or cis-gender or binary.

By saying that you have known it all along and that it was “so obvious” and asking them what took them so long to “admit” something as “obvious” to you, you are (surely unintentionally) kind of trivialising the journey the person has gone through before coming out to you.

I’m sure you don’t mean to do it, but maybe don’t say such things to the person who has just come out to you?

Things you can say, though – if you really want to show how supportive you are – could be:

“I’m really happy for you.”

“I’m so glad you can finally live your truth!

Or just give them a hug! Educate yourself. Ask for clarification.

(Fellow-queer folk, add on!)

Please keep in mind, guys, coming out is a lot lesser about the person to whom one comes out, and more about the person who IS coming out.

So, don’t question their orientation. Try not to overwhelm them by insisting that they answer certain questions that they may not be comfortable answering, or by rushing to apply stereotypes (intentionally, or unintentionally).

Just offer them your unconditional love and support in any form. That’s all one needs.

[walkingbomb]

reminder to:

straighten your back

go pee goddAMN IT STOP HOLDING IT

go take your meds if you need to

drink some water

go get a snack if you havent eaten in a while

maybe wander around the house/stretch a little if you’ve been sat at the computer a while (artists especially: sTRETCH THOSE WRISTS)

reply to that text/message from earlier you’d forgotten about

maybe send a nice lil message to someone having a bad day?

[mouthfullofsxnd]

I just would like to thank everyone who ever reblogs this so that it somehow ends up back on my dash because I usually need the reminder (especially the drinking water one)

[rickriordanrevamp]

UNCLENCH YOUR JAW

[catchymemes]

Anti anxiety.

[itsgettingpersoval]

This!!

[100493503004422]

do u guys understand how creepy the pledge of allegiance is though like every day when ur a kid everybody just chants how great america is every morning it’s creepy

[holmes-sweet-holmes-deactivated]

You do that every morning???

[jolivet-deactivated20190306]

EVERY MORNING.

[youblowuponesun]

wait

wait

is this a real thing i thought that was just in the simpsons

[jolivet-deactivated20190306]

no son

[you-are-talking-about-this-deac]

Wait, other countries don’t do this.

[sleepybiflinge]

*whispers* Not even Russia

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I remember when my dad had a conversation with me

because I asked him what the Austrian pledge of allegiance was (because he’s from Austria)

and he said “we don’t have a pledge of allegiance”

and I said “why not?”

“honey, think about what training your children to mindlessly pledge to a flag, without really knowing what they’re talking about, sounds like to Austrians”

“oh. hitler.”

“exactly”

[foxanddanapetrie]

RE FUCKING TWEET

[tanknaka]

hey

hey friend

dont kill yourself tonight ok

you have a really pretty smile and i know its not always easy to manage one but itd be a bummer if we never had the chance to see it ever again

youre really important and you matter a lot so stay safe and try and have a nice sleep

[the-grace-of-fallen-angels]

I would like a moment to thank the people who reblog post like this so that it eventually shows on my dash.

It is keeping me alive

[lavendertears]

I actually really needed this tonight, thank you

[spinningrims]

i’m seeing a lot of people reblogging suicide hotlines and this is just a reminder that this is a suicide help line that works like a text-based instant messenger for people who may need to talk to someone but have trouble/are uncomfortable making phone calls

[groovian-whovian]

Never don’t reblog this. There are so many people who have such bad anxiety about phone calls. This can save so many lives

[determined-mind-deactivated2025]

[girlwhorpsalot]

I needed this.

[mentalmentalhealth]

Thank you to all the people who posted this so I ended up seeing it. I really needed this right now. Thank you!

[aro-ace-christian]

Yeah… Not gonna lie… I cried…

[muslimintp-1999-girl]

We need more people like this

[armillary-spheres-lover]

Goddamn it stop making me feel human

[dreamsrainandwitchythings]

The therapist I wanna be.

[positivelyqueerace]

Text in the image:

“I’m a therapist and keep this poster in my waiting room, apparently it’s saved a few lives.”

I don’t like the phrase “a cry for help.” I just don’t like how it sounds. When somebody says to me, “I’m thinking about suicide. I have a plan: I just need a reason not to do it,” the last thing I see is helplessness.

I think your depression has been beating you up for years. It’s called you ugly, and stupid, and pathetic, and a failure, for so long that you’ve forgotten that it’s wrong. You don’t see any good in yourself, and you don’t have any hope.

But still here you are: you’ve come over to me, banged on my door and said, “HEY! Staying alive is REALLY HARD right now! Just give me something to fight with! I don’t care if it’s a stick! Give me a stick and I can stay alive!”

How is that helpless? I think that’s incredible. You’re like a marine: trapped for years behind enemy lines. Your gun has been taken away, you’re out of ammo, you’re malnourished, and you’ve probably caught some kind of jungle virus that’s making you hallucinate giant spiders.

And you’re still just going, “GIVE ME A STICK. I’M NOT DYING OUT HERE.” “A cry for help” makes it sound like I’m supposed to take pity on you, but you don’t need my pity. This isn’t pathetic. This is the will to survive. This is how humans lived long enough to become the dominant species.

With NO hope, running on NOTHING, you’re ready to cut through a hundred miles of hostile jungle with nothing but a stick, if that’s what it takes to get to safety.

All I’m doing is handing out sticks.

You’re the one saying alive.

[harmony-is-happiness]

[kestrel-tree]

Ridiculous yet effective ways to deal with Executive Dysfunction

Dealing with executive dysfunction and ADHD becomes so much easier when you stop trying to do things the way you feel like you should be able to do them (like everyone else) and start finding ways that actually work for you, no matter how “silly” or “unnecessary” they seem.

For years my floor was constantly covered in laundry. Clean laundry got mixed in with dirty and I had to wash things twice, just making more work for myself. Now I just have 3 laundry bins: dirty (wash it later), clean (put it away later), and mystery (figure it out later). Sure, theoretically I could sort my clothes into dirty or clean as soon as I take them off and put them away straight out of the dryer, but realistically that’s never going to be a sustainable strategy for me.

How many garbage bins do you need in a bedroom? One? WRONG! The correct answer is one within arms reach at all times. Which for me is three. Because am I really going to get up to blow my nose when I’m hyperfocusing? NO. In allergy season I even have an empty kleenex box for “used tissues I can use again.” Kinda gross? Yeah. But less gross than a snowy winter landscape of dusty germs on my desk.

I used to be late all the time because I couldn’t find my house key. But it costs $2.50 and 3 minutes to copy a key, so now there’s one in my backpack, my purse, my gym bag, my wallet, my desk, and hanging on my door. Problem solved.

I’m like a ninja for getting pout the door past reminder notes without noticing. If I really don’t want to forget something, I make a physical barrier in front of my door. A sticky note is a lot easier to walk past than a two foot high cardboard box with my wallet on top of it.

Executive dysfunction is always going to cause challenges, but often half the struggle is trying to cope by pretending not to have executive dysfunction, instead of finding actual solutions.

[roachpatrol]

i left cabinet doors open all my life and couldn’t make myself stop leaving them open until i figured out my subconscious just wants to know where everything is at a glance. i put labels on each cabinet door for what was behind the cabinet and after that i was a lot better at closing them. 

showers are hard for me because they involve a lot of steps to get in and out. buying cleaning hand wipes helps me stay a lot cleaner and happier when i’m too tired or distracted to make myself be a normal person– they’re faster and involve way less prep time, decision making, and unpleasant physical sensations. 

i have disordered eating because, again, getting food is complicated, much less cooking anything. buying 10-12$ of cliff bars at a go and keeping them in my room by my bed gives me a headstart on breakfast and lets me take my meds on time. otherwise i would lie in bed, not taking my meds because i had to eat, and not eating because i was too tired and nauseous from being hungry to get out of bed.  

‘just try harder’ is not a solution. figuring out the actual problem and addressing it is the solution.

’normal’ isn’t the goal. you can’t be normal. it’s too late, but you know what, fuck normal. trying to be normal is going to kill you. ‘functional’ is the goal, and you can be functional. you can kick ass at functional. and that’s a lot better. 

[copperbadge]

When I talk about how there is no universal system for Keeping Your Shit Together, and how it’s more important to find a system that works for you, this is exactly the kind of thing I mean. 

My keys hang on the door so I literally can’t leave my apartment without touching them. My socks kept getting everywhere when I kept them with my other clothes, so instead I now keep them in a little hutch in the kitchen, where I keep all my shoes. All my silverware is in jars on my kitchen island so I can see clearly when I am out of forks. When I didn’t want to put on my socks to go running, I bought running shoes that didn’t require socks. There are people who would find all of the above unworkable and/or appalling but they don’t have to live my life and I do. 

Find what works for you and work it. Doesn’t matter if it’s weird or unusual or not as healthy as some weird ideal which is probably just a marketing tool anyway. If it works, work it. 

[relatable-autism-memes]

this isn’t exactly a meme but im sure many of my followers could benefit from this info!

[radicel-archive]

fuck it

i dont want girls sexualising mlm relationships anymore. at all

i dont want them fetishizing our relationships bc they think it’s sexy

i dont care if its a “way for them to express their sexuality”. that aint right and its messed that they can say that they want men in the porn industry to stop fetishizing wlw relationships, only to do the same bc its “fandom”

[radicel-archive]

can yall please reblog this actually ??

bc like. im a boy attracted to boys. and this is making me uncomfortable and i want it to stop

and im not the only one ? a handful of people have agreed with me and im sure there are more

please dont ignore this bc you want to keep writing/drawing/reading m/m porn…. or bc im a boy and you dont care what i have to say….. especially if you disagree with the treatment of wlw in the porn industry its a double standard and this is important to me and i dont want it to be swept under the rug

[transboybrock]

Add on: you can still write, draw and read about mlm without fetishizing them. By fetishization, OP means that you only see these relationships as sexy and sinful instead of just seeing it as average everyday relationships.

Nearly every girl I’ve met within fandoms with mlm ships has only focused on the men having sex or calling them ‘my nasty gay babies’ and that’s just gross.

[theinkstainsblog]

We’re all writers here so I thought it important that y’all see this and take note. 

[covveycrow]

^

[overthemoon4themarauders]

Remus Lupin

Reblog if you:

-Like Remus Lupin

-Love Remus Lupin

-Need Remus Lupin to live

-Had a breakdown when Remus died in HPatDH

-Read Remus Lupin fanfiction

-Ship Wolfstar

[funny-thoughts]

The concept of dragons was thought of before dinosaurs were discovered

[testimonialpictures-deactivated]

Some trans guy tips from your dad

Don’t try that mascara/arm hair shit. I’ve been passing for more than a year with short, blond arm hair. It’s not an important secondary sex characteristic.

Board shorts (without pockets in the front) do wonders to minimize the width of your hips. Always choose board shorts over swim trunks. Choose them over cargo shorts if it’s appropriate.

Speak from your chest, never from your head.

The goal of binding should not be an entirely flat chest; you should bind for your body type.

GC2b makes the best binders out there, and their products are designed specifically for trans men/transmasculine people.

It might seem useless if you’re pre-T, but working out can be a big help for dysphoria.

Eyebrows are really important to passing pre-testosterone. Muss that shit up. Make them look unkempt.

When you ask for a haircut, make sure the edges in the back are squared, not rounded.

If you have peach fuzz, I would advise shaving it. Cis guys shed theirs when they go through puberty. Shaving can also help with facial hair dysphoria.

Don’t ever buy a binder from Amazon. They run in strange sizes (I was an XXL even though I’m a M in GC2b) and take weeks/months to come. It’s also difficult to breathe in them after a few hours.

[fattyatomicmutant-deactivated20]

@shyguyshiloh @kuchenkat

[11dragonmaster]

Spread the word, especially for the board shorts thing!!!!!! They do WONDERS for making hips appear slimmer!!!!!

[thestrugglinwriter-blog-deactiv]

@cloudstreamer

[thingsthatarebetterthansex]

for my masculine children :-*

[seventhnight]

Adding a couple things. 

-Patience is a virtue you need to come to terms with. Even on T, things take time. My voice dropped immediately, but my cycle continued for 6 months. We’re all different. 

-In the summer, HYDRATE YOURSELF. A binder is an extra layer, and mine have always been very warm. 

-When its not too hot, layers are your friend. You’d be surprised what even simply an undershirt can do to smooth out your look. 

-You are going to get misgendered. This is a fact, and it sucks. Learn to politely correct people. Remember you might be the first (openly) trans person they meet, so be a good ambassador. 

-When you start T, your smell will change. You will sweat like you’ve never sweat before, and it WILL STINK. Adjust your bathing habits accordingly. 

[nyamafriend]

*coughs in direction of my trans friendos*

[cornerof5thandvermouth]

If you have a really large chest you might do better with Underworks binders. They aren’t pretty, they’re not soft, but they do a good job and were the first on the market for a very long time. I couldn’t stand gc2b so if you’re like me, try Underworks.

Don’t double bind.

DON’T USE DUCK TAPE. I still have scars from a dumb decision I made as a teen and I’m 31 now.

When the time comes for top surgery, shop around. Find someone who will tailor your chest to your needs. Look at their portfolio. Compare surgeons. See if you can find someone who will work with your health insurance if you have it.

Be safe. Be healthy. Take your time. It’s not a race or a competition.

[constellations-and-energy]

*incoherent screaming* MY TRANS MEN/ TRANS MASCULINE FOLLOWERS, L O O K👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

[gerrycanavan]

Jury nullification. Pass it on.

[antigovernmentextremist]

Jury nullification is so fucking important.

[lesserjoke]

This is something that more people should be aware of, if only because (in many states, at least) defense attorneys are actually prohibited from mentioning it to jurors. The law allows a jury to return a “not guilty” verdict contrary to the facts of the case, but not for the defense to inform them of that power or to argue for its application in the current trial.

[frpeter]

I didn’t know about this. Wow.

[theveganarchist]

always reblog

[enbyhugs]

This is SUPER IMPORTANT and also a good reason to show up for jury duty. You know all those laws you think are stupid? This is your chance to maybe do something about it. 

[errors-dot-albi-deactivated2015]

I…. I thought this was common knowledge… signal boosting this because it obviously isn’t!

[trials-of-socrates]

Did not know this

[thecringeandwincefactory-deacti]

Jury nullification in the United States has its origins in colonial British America. Similar to British law, in the United States jury nullification occurs when a jury in a criminal case reaches a verdict contrary to the weight of evidence, sometimes because of a disagreement with the relevant law.

[wherehavalltheflowersgone]

Important Warning Please Read and Share

So Scientology has recently been purchasing ad spots on social media sites including Twitter and Facebook. Scientology has always worked hard to recruit young people it seems like they’re investing in social media as well now. I know most people think Scientology is a joke but it’s a seriously dangerous cult which uses fear, extortion, violence, vandalism and various other unethical actions against those who oppose them both inside and outside the church. Here is key information on the abuses committed by Scientology: 

•Scientology uses a form of pseudo-therapy called auditing which focuses largely on embarrassing and traumatic memories. Scientology collects the information you share and uses that information to threaten you if you oppose the church. They also charge huge amounts of money for auditing sessions (which is why they really are doing all this).

 •They are extremely anti-psychology and psychiatry and pressure you against taking any antidepressants, anti-anxiety medication or any other drugs for mental health.

 •They believe homosexuality can be “cured” and are blatantly homophobic. •Enemies of the church are labeled “suppressive persons” and it is forbidden to communicate with such people. This isn’t just to limit the negative press they receive but also is a manipulative tool. If you are in the cult and decide to leave or criticize the church you stand the risk of being completely cut off from your friends and family. “Suppressive Persons” are often also harassed, stalked, or threatened. 

•If you’re new to Scientology and your family or friends are worried about you being in a cult you’re instructed to cut them out of your life, increasing your reliance on the support system (though there’s nothing supportive about it) the church give to you. 

•Scientology’s doctrine includes the concept of “Fair Game”. This basically says that those who are judged a threat to the Church can be punished and harassed by any and all means possible.

 •Because of this, they have no moral qualms about having their members lie in court which they use to defend themselves from lawsuits or charges that they’ve broken the law and also to help win lawsuits against their enemies. •They essentially spied on and stole information from the IRS and tried to frame the mayor of Clearwater Florida for a hit and run. 

•Scientology filed 50 different lawsuits in one year against the Cult Awareness Network, an anti-cult organization. Using false testimony they won one of the suits and because the organization couldn’t pay the fine Scientology took the organizations name and logo so if you were calling to get out of Scientology you’d be unknowingly telling Scientology of your intentions. (For full transparency my mom was a member of the Cult Awareness Network before it was taken over and was sued individually by the Church of Scientology) 

•Scientology has an official branch known as the Sea Org, a mixture between a paramilitary group and slavery, comprised of their most dedicated members including many children/teens who’ve been raised in Scientology. This is where some of the most rampant and terrifying abuse in Scientology occurs. 

•Sea Org members often work over 100 hours a week for Scientology for around 2$ per hour.

 •Sea Org member’s living conditions are terrible; they live in overcrowded communal rooms with up to 12 other people, are not given healthcare unless there is a free clinic in the area, often are forced to miss meals or sleep in order to successfully completed their work. 

•Several former Sea Org members have accused the church of physical abuse. •Sea Org members may not have children and women who have become pregnant have reportedly been forced/coerced by their higher-ups to have abortions. 

•Leaving Sea Org without permission automatically makes you a suppressive person, so young adults who’ve been raised in Scientology who want to leave are cut off from everyone they’ve ever known with no money or job and getting permission to leave can require 3 years of hard labor, social isolation, and group pressure.

[arashi-of-ota]

thie above is 100% true. one of my friends has scientology and other cults as a special interest. there are hundreds of pages of documentation of their abuse that you can publicly read about.

it’s one of the scariest “religions” you’ll ever meet if not THE scariest because it was PURPOSELY created to make money. unlike most cults that do have some seed of genuine belief however twisted and off base the founders are, scientology was never a belief system - it was a get rich quick scheme for a terrible hack author who saw that there was more money to be made in manipulating people into a cult and then not letting them leave. higher and higher levels of scientology, which you have to take to be truly “clear” aka free of evil spirits, will cost you thousands and even millions of dollars. they will literally hook you into a billion year contract and then pursue you for any money you “owe” them, thousands of “back fees” for their religious training, if you try to leave.

oh and it has literally driven people to suicide as part of its goal to keep “suppressive persons” from spreading information. someone even made a fucking song about its abuses.

stay the fuck away from anything marked scientology or dianetics. narconon (NOT the same as narcotics anonymous, the 12 step program) is also their thing. never even step FOOT into one of their free dianetics “auditing sessions” because they will use it to manipulate you into joining. they are incredibly persistent and will use every trick in the book to get you on board.

scientology: not even once.

[fierceawakening]

It was a special interest of mine too for a while. This is all true.

They literally tried to drive a journalist crazy who reported on them critically. Paulette Cooper was her name.

They will literally attempt to make you paranoid if you ever cross them.

Hell, a few years back a guy from the BBC did a documentary on them and they did it to him, to the point where he explosively lost his temper at one of them on camera.

The intention being to make him look unstable in his own documentary so people wouldn’t believe what he was exposing.

[strangehorse]

Yes, please please please keep an eye out for Narconon. It is not Narcotics Anonymous, though it’s pretty clearly intended to cause confusion and make people think they are at NA. It’s designed to prey on vulnerable people looking for help and multiple people have died during the program. Scientology often gets used as a punchline, but it’s genuinely an incredibly dangerous organisation.

Please also be aware of the Volunteer Ministers, who go to disaster zones to spread Scientology teachings.

[amy-vic]

Signal boosting bc this needs like 20M more notes. Religions can have Problems, but Scientology is a cult that will destroy your entire fucking life, if not just kill you outright.

Don’t believe me? Ask Shelly Miscavige. (Oh, wait…)

[diamondlefteye]

help a trans man pay for college!!!

my name is john and I’m trying to pay for my schooling after my mom refused to sign the fafsa to literally let the government handle it for virtually free.

here are the convos between me and my mom:

heres the proof the fafsa not being completed:

heres the convos between me and my dad proving he doesnt understand modern times:

and heres the total for the year:

I do not need 23,602.00.

I am only paying for half of that for the first semester which is 11,801.

I will be paying half of that through my new job, so I am asking for help raising 5,900.

I am living w my friend and I have half of my things (the other half I lost bc my mom threw them out). I will be trying to get back my financial aid for the second semester for I’m half ass out for this one so I’m literally begging for your help.

Please please pleaseee donate to my paypal or reblog this to get the word out.

It would literally mean the world to me☀️

[diamondlefteye]

120/5900

[diamondlefteye]

please donate if u can!! This months payment is nearly 2000 and I need help to raise the other half

[diamondlefteye]

Please don’t let this die!!

370/5000