Vurry Vurry Refreshing Viernes

Ronnie | 24 | they/them

[mechanicalrot]

*meeeting a friend for coffee* friend: how's work been?

me: oh you know *mimes putting a gun in my mouth but i moan a little and start sucking the barrel and pushing it deeper

[rexmanda]

rexmanda fans come get your slop

[klapollo]

at planned parenthood and they're playing regular show

[klapollo]

[cutecipher]

"dude if you don't get this abortion benson is gonna fire us"

[3000s]

ocd will have me thinking i cant text "here now if you wanna head over" because i sound like blowjob mario with a walkie talkie

[3000s]

nobody thinks this way, you are a broken person

[memorycycle]

these teenagers and their dog are trying ruin our money laundering business. no tony put the gun down were doing this the old fashioned way. were gonna dress up as monsters and scare them

[altades]

You ever see a girl so pretty you need to kys

[dogpuppy]

[tera-of-the-dragons]

grossed is such a weird way to describe how much a movie makes. how much did this movie yucky

[owlthex]

When there's a very obvious bloodstain in the hardwood kitchen floor, but the house is 30k under expected price

[owlthex]

I feel like the picture is necessary to understand just how not subtle this is.

[tuxankhamun]

it's fine

[keepcatholic]

I’d like to point out that the colour red has more positive than negative meanings.

[keepcatholic]

[sexhaver]

it's extremely funny reading historical accounts of Spontaneous Human Combustion because it follows the normal historical trend of other 1800s paranormal phenomena where it stopped happening as much right around the time cameras were invented and stopped happening entirely when everyone started carrying mini cameras in their pockets, but unlike most others of its ilk, it was effectively replaced by this mysterious phenomena where alocoholics would spill liqour on themselves and then fall asleep smoking a cigarette and turn into a fireball. nobody knows if these two things are related

[vimbry-moved]

got chased by a skeleton but when they caught me they just gave me a kiss and hug. turns out it was an xoskeleton.

[vimbry-moved]

this one's a big hit with the ghosts

[gaynfl-moved]

what's your "if I won the lottery I wouldn't tell anyone but there would be signs" thing? mine is getting a fully green kitchen

[gaynfl-moved]

[ozempicofficial]

[ntrider]

noncon friendship

[sonyvegas9-deactivated20241118]

Coworkers

[ryukisgod]

Your friend’s boyfriend

[innerchildabortionclinic]

when I say "you should kill him" and people look at me weird

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

[2colde]

they are poisoning us today with a thursday poison little do they know we’ve been through a few thursday poisonings so it won’t kill us just yet