happy happy joy joy joyyyy! 🥰

send me nut vids.

[mewvore]

"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s

[pmamtraveller]

By Jocelin Carmes

[road0flife]

[itsmerandi]

Baked a mango lassi cheesecake for my July bake 😁😋

She got a leeeetle 🤏🏾 scorched on the top but otherwise she's perfection!

So silky and smooth, so flavorful! Best cheesecake I've ever made, hands down!

This one uses melted white chocolate and cornstarch instead of eggs for better texture. Don't know why, but I trusted the process and it came out so good!

I ended up using a white chocolate truffle bar the Instacart shopper mistakenly brought me instead of a regular white chocolate bar and I'm sooo happy I had it because the fancy Ghirardelli baking white chocolate bar I got from another store (that I paid $6 for!!!) burnt itself AND the bowl it was in?

And you're probably like Randi, you gotta go low and slow! And I did! I did like soooo many rounds, like over 5 mins total, of 30 seconds at half power, and they never melted!!! But apparently this was happening underneath 😭

Anywayyyyyy, again, so happy I had backup. And just enough, too!

Here's the full recipe :)

https://ashbaber.com/mango-lassi-cheesecake/#mango-lassi-cheesecake

[s3xv1o-deactivated20191026]

[itsmerandi]

Posted a wholeeee video post about my cheesecake like over an hour ago and tumblr just ate it ig :/

[itsmerandi]

Do we think this is enough to kill the poopy produce parasite? 😬

I don't have a food thermometer so idk the internal temp but I roasted at 425° long enough for it to smell burnt 😅

I usually go 30 mins but I forgot to set a timer this time so... 🤷🏾‍♀️

Pray for my bowels! 😭

[tonguetyd]

Southerners really went off with “y’all” and the Brits really went off with “innit” but most of all the Aussies really went off with calling everyone cunts all the time

[lustcannibalism]

they should invent a way for me to do tasks without the mind torture

[elveny]

If your business can only be reached and all info about it only be accessed via Facebook or Instagram, know that it isn’t reachable or accessible AT ALL.

The whole metaverse can no longer be properly viewed without an account and I am definitely not making one just to see your contact info or opening hours.

Get a fucking WEBSITE. It can be just a static landing page with the relevant information. But get off the metaverse!

[itsmerandi]

My thing about ppl that get places and then wanna leave is like

Okay then leave?

I spent my time and money to get here to experience this event. I have no interest in cutting it short because you didn't assess the situation for your needs ahead of time

If that makes me selfish or lacking compassion, then so be it

Because I think it's selfish and and lacking consideration for you to come and ruin the vibe

[wetheurban]

What a privilege it is to age. What a blessing. What a miracle.

[itsmerandi]

Met up with Lesbian Friend for the second time today.

Didn't love our time together tbh

I think the age difference might be a dealbreaker idk

I'm an old lady. She's a club girlie. We don't get each other's references.

She claims to be a nature girlie but if she is, it's in a different way than I know nature girlies to be. No curiosity and wonder about all the plants around us :/

We went to the Lotus & Water Lily Festival and it just didn't seem like she was too enthused to be there?

We got there in time for a little latin dance session, and she wasn't really down for that either, kinda joked her way through it. Left in the middle for ice cream.

And my thing is, you don't have to say yes to hang out with me if I'm doing something you don't wanna do

Because your uninterested presence is worse than being alone

She wasn't doing too well in the heat, which I can empathize with, but also, don't agree to come out at the hottest part of the day if you know you're heat sensitive?

And it's SO FUNNY because as I'm writing this, I get a text from Foraging Friend who is super heat sensitive, and she just invited me back to the same festival next weekend, saying it'd have to be in the morning before it gets too hot.

AND THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT!

It's perfect tho, because the whole time I was there, I was like, Foraging Friend would've loved this. I should've invited her instead :/

So yay for do overs! 😊🪷

And maybe the lily pads will be open by then :)

[digitaldiscipline]

This is the 85 year old creator of Roger Rabbit:

[itsmerandi]

Idk what was going on but the cheapest Uber option at the time if booking was an Uber Black

And MAN OH MAN I wish I could afford to travel like this all the time 😭

Quiet ride, clean car, spacious, A/C at the perfect level

Especially given that I use Empower more than Uber lately (but Uber bullied them out of DC so I can only use them in MD) and Empower drivers can be...interesting

I almost wish I'd never gotten this experience since everything else will pale in comparison 😆

[byjove]

Heterosexual relationship culture is so alien to me and I don’t know if it’s the fact I’m not cishet or the fact I’m autistic but I hear so many things that make me go “Am I insane or are they?”

There’s a lot of hate on widowers and I saw a woman say “You cannot compete with a dead woman.” which is perhaps a reasonable statement to say if he’s constantly comparing you to his dead partner but that wasn’t what the post was about. And I realized “Oh my God, these people genuinely feel like they’re constantly in competition with their spouse’s exes and the ex being dead makes them feel insecure that they cannot best her.”

There’s also been an uptick in the ‘men and women cannot be ‘just’ friends’ rhetoric which I feel like is extremely dangerous and reflects the rise of fascism and sexism. Some of these stories of women feeling threatened by their husband’s female best friend have some merit and others are like “I feel angry that my husband still talks to the girl he grew up next door to and she and her wife are invited to family gatherings and included in family photos sometimes. Am I right to be suspicious?” No. No you’re not. I cannot imagine being you and living with that high level of stress and paranoia and constant torment and jealousy about your husband having a positive relationship with anyone who isn’t you.

[covington-shenanigans]

okay look i know this isn't relevant to this post past the second paragraph but. here's the thing. the facts of the case are as follows:

1) I am widowed. my Beloved Wife of Blessed Memory(tm) died in 2019

2) I got together with my current partner about 18 months later

3) when I am committing acts of Foolishness my current partner loves to gesture at the sky to my dead wife, like "do you see this shit, my liege" and regularly says to me things like "[wife's name] was right about this" when my Foolishness inevitably comes back to bite me in the ass

4) this happens. all the time

more importantly:

5) my current partner is on tumblr

6) they love to incessantly send me posts

WHICH MEANS:

7) they just sent me this post with this commentary:

8) they really, really are ganging up on me with her. god help us if there's an afterlife and those two ever actually meet. "eternal rest" my ass, i will never know peace again

[itsmerandi]

Jotting down this salmon marinade in case it turns out to be fire

3 tbsp harissa

3 tbsp olive oil

2 tbsp honey

Squeeze tube garlic bc too lazy to deal with fresh rn

Juice of 1 HUMONGOUS, very juicy lemon

Cumin, a few shakes short of a fuckton

Oregano

Salt and pepper

Tastes p good as is. Let's see how it does as a marinade!