A Certified Mess

Queer he/they adult

[zeroperks]

what if a shrimp was a baby..........................

[orpheuslament]

"i wish will wouldve walked away from hannibal & gotten therapy at the end of the show 🥺" im gonna be as gentle as i can when i tell you this: you are an idiot & perhaps should not be watching the cannibal falls in love tv series

[orpheuslament]

i enjoyed the psychological thriller about a serial killer & a fbi agent getting tangled in a deeply sensual & homoerotic game of cat & mouse only to be resolved by said fbi agent embracing his darker nature & succumbing to the dangerous & intoxicating love he feels for another man but i would have preferred it if it was about a young witch trying to solve the disappearance of her neighbours cat in a small village in the alps. this is how you sound

[ruby-white-rabbit]

"And gotten therapy"

Girl did yall miss the part where Hannibal WAS HIS THERAPIST?

[fly-chicken]

Hi new Tumblr users

Please know this sites hashtagging system is categorical and NOT clout based

Aka if I look up the “Wendell and Wild” tag, I should find clips, media, art and posts related to Wendell and wild ONLY. Same with any other random tag searched

If I spy a selfie, a random neighborhood, or any other kind of “insta” post trying to take likes for a popular hashtag, I’m reporting you for spam. Most other long term users will too and your acct will be fast tracked as a spam blogger and blocked.

You will not ruin the last non corporate site for us, especially by trying to treat this site like influencers matter. If you get popular, it’s bc you’re a clown w a skill not bc your hot or rich or skinny, got it?

[honestlyvan]

#holy shit at people in the notes this isn't 'tyrannical' it's basic courtesy AND against the tos #the spam report button is easily accessible for this exact reason #cross tagging is absolutely reportable spam according to tos so just don't do it #it also doesn't get you any more notes it just pisses people off

[findingfeather]

Like for real guys: This is against TOS. It is not allowed. It is spam. IT is not less spam because you are not a botfarm. Don't do it.

[delicatefury]

People (me) will report you for this (I will). If you are spamming the tags, someone (again, me) will click the little report button (and I will enjoy doing it) every time they (I) see your unrelated posts clogging their (my) search.

Do not tempt me.

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I will add that nine times out of ten, it is obviously, verifiably spam. Like, links to random websites, porn, ads for shit, scams, all that jazz.

So if I see your post in the mix, I will treat it the exact same way.

[kamithesilly]

i love that seals are carnivores and then they always look exactly like that:

[lemontongues]

shoutout to slow growers, late bloomers, people whose plans got derailed by circumstances beyond their control or their own choices, people who never had a plan to begin with, people who have had to start over when theyre too old to feel like theyre supposed to be where they are, people who cant pretend theyre built for the environment theyre in, and everyone who's not living the life they thought they would. im proud of you for making it this far and i hope you keep going until youre happy ♡

[mynorthernattitude]

they should make a sleep that feels like you’ve slept

[plaguedocboi]

He means a little squeeze bottle with brine shrimp inside but… bottle feeding the loblings…

[ittybittyisopod]

I'm sorry this was too good of a mental image I had to draw it

[onlytiktoks]

[aniseandspearmint]

Asdfghjkl her perfectly straight face and even tone throughout should win an AWARD

[prokopetz]

Blackout poetry exists on a dual axis from "banal" to "insightful" on the input side and "kind of deep" to "incredibly fucking dumb" on the output side, and while taking something banal and producing something kind of deep is well and fine, for my money taking something insightful and rendering it incredibly fucking dumb is where the real art is.

[petrodykeonicapocalypse]

[pukicho]

Don’t give up. We can beat them! The kinder they are the harder they fall.

[howlingday]

Puki, be honest with me... Are we the baddies?

[pukicho]

Whatever

[catgirltitties]

.

[dogpuppy]

[sheikahfication]

I need a blowjob but I don’t have a penis or a strap on and I’m not taking off my pants so you’re just gonna have to figure it out

[my-dailydreams]

[prettyyinpunk]

#mytwuck

[asneakyfox]

one of my favorite bits in lord of the rings is something the movies didn't really try to do because it's entirely internal, but sam's carrying the ring and it starts trying to do its work on him, so he's having these intrusive visions of himself marching at the head of a vast and terrible army, and he just starts laughing because, me? samwise gamgee? sam gamgee the general sam gamgee the dark lord are you for real? man i just want to go home and do some gardening. and the ring gets frustrated and it starts trying to figure out other stuff that would actually tempt sam and it's finally like, okay, but hear me out: imagine if you could have...A REALLY REALLY BIG GARDEN

[asneakyfox]

and then he's like, i don't know that sounds like a lot more work than a regular garden actually. why don't we just get on with finding mister frodo

[anarchistmemedistro]