Computer show me the funny immediately

The lab rat Janus has two heads. One thinks about science, and the other, art. Together they reblog shitposts on the internet.

[raccoonmilf]

Scientifically speaking, it’s only tentacle porn if the suckers are found exclusively on the distal tentacular club. If the suckers go all the way up the length of the appendage, it’s just arm porn.

[clannfearrunt]

It is simply too many degrees Celsiheit outside.

[kaypendragon]

@next-of-kith new temperature measurement dropped.

[next-of-kith]

what i hate the most is the entire system this implies:

length

yeeters, centinches, kilometles

volume

queeters, lounces, cups

mass

kilogrounds, grounces, tons

pressure

pascibars, centinches of watercury

energy

btules, ergalories, electherm-poundals

[depsidase]

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[viralfrog]

[comedownstairsandsayhello]

2027: Wizards of the Coast and the American Psychological Association collaborate on the D&DSM, 6th Edition, widely regarded as the worst thing ever published

[jazze-bee]

They got off to a rocky start.

[thecryptkeeper]

[heyniceworkasshole]

[krakencran]

Life is short. Ragebait your cat.

[scarlettaagni]

so i think the solution is to give dachshunds a third pair of legs right in the middle

[depsidase]

[heroincowboy]

[bwooomscratches]

[doomtemparts]

one of my friends in a discord server was talking about how they were nervous about their first scheduled acupuncture appointment. another friend offered to do a tarot reading for them. sent this picture.

[something-truly-evil]

my friend said his flight transmasc

[dogbaits]

i’m breaking out into a fucking fever over this person roleplaying an infant found by tony stark on twitter