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[jasonsaesthetic]

Percy Jackson made my standards unrealisticly high

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Percy: sometimes I make stupid decisions

Annabeth: sometimes?

Percy:... All the time I make stupid decisions

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Rachael Elizabeth Dare did NOT get the recognition she deserved in that series and it makes me sad

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Leo: Piper did it hurt

Piper: Yeah yeah you’re gonna say when i “fell from heaven”

Leo:No.... I saw you fall out of the chair earlier

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[nico hiding]

Will: Nico come out of there

Nico: the closet or my hiding spot?

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Annabeth: *sobbing*

Leo: [pulls out a reverse uno card]

Leo: great now I’m crying

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Piper: [fighting wearing heels]

Jason: WOW, how does she do that?

Leo: [walking flawlessly in 6 in heels] I don’t know man

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Will: [trying to take Nico’s fries]

Nico: don’t mess with me, i’m a small angry italian

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Percy: someone died in the living room

Nico: well I guess it’s not a living room anymore

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Alex: Magnus, you’re pretty

Magnus: tha-

Alex: pretty fucking stupid

Magnus: ...

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Nico: why does everyone assume I’m unhappy? I might look and act like a Bitch, but I’m thriving

[moved-to-ofswordsandpens]

the entirety of the lightning thief really is just Percy, Annabeth, and Grover fighting over the use of one (1) singular brain cell isn’t it

[moved-to-ofswordsandpens]

She said, “Children, it is too late to be out all alone. Where are your parents?”

“They’re … um …” Annabeth started to say.

“We’re orphans,” I said.

“Orphans?” the woman said. The word sounded alien in her mouth. “But, my dears! Surely not!”

“We got separated from our caravan,” I said. “Our circus caravan. The ringmaster told us to meet him at the gas station if we got lost, but he may have forgotten, or maybe he meant a different gas station. Anyway, we’re lost. Is that food I smell?”

.

He looked us over. “How did you die, then?”

I nudged Grover.

“Oh,” he said. “Um … drowned … in the bathtub.”

“All three of you?” Charon asked.

We nodded.

.

“I’m not saying hello to a pink poodle,” I said. “For-get it.”

“Percy,” Annabeth said. “I said hello to the poodle. You say hello to the poodle.”

The poodle growled.

I said hello to the poodle.

.

“I don’t know. Just a feeling. Annabeth, come with me-”

“Are you kidding?” She looked at me as if I’d just dropped from the moon. Her cheeks were bright red.

“What’s the problem now?” I demanded.

“Me, go with you to the … the ‘Thrill Ride of Love’? How embarrassing is that? What if somebody saw me?”

.

I LOVE my kids

[jasonsaesthetic]

Reyna: I’m a bad Bitch you can’t kill me

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Annabeth: I feel like I forgot something

Percy: *runs up to annabeth out of breath* yeah you left me at Walmart

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Percy: *about to jump off a cliff*

Jason:*watching* Leo aren’t you going stop him?

Leo: nope, I wanna see where this goes

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Jason: sorry I took so long, Hera YEETED me to oblivion

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Percy: my April fools joke is me. I’m the joke