It's Like A Horsegirl Phase, But With Scorpions

Jasper, the Mayor of Scorpions | they/them | aromantic-asexual | adult, over 21 | fandom, personal, shitpost blog | icon drawn by weekly-eons

[jasper-the-menace]

Introduction

Howdy. I'm Jasper, a nonbinary aroace menace, they/them pronouns. I'm an adult.

This is my main blog, so you get a bunch of bullshit, my fandoms, my fanfiction, my interactions with my mutuals, and sometimes stuff on the spicy end. We get weird here.

Before You Follow

I am an adult. If following an adult bothers you, please feel free to block me for your sake.

I engage in fiction to deal with things, or because I want to. I don't care how "pure" it is, we're refusing to give purity culture a platform here. I also write some stuff that leans into being fucked up.

I'm queer as hell and we use microlabels here. I love people with neopronouns.

I'm also a polytheist. And a furry. And an occultist. And also big into scorpion biology. Gods, I know so much stuff about scorpion biology now.

Side Blogs & Social Medias

@jasper-the-menace : my main/personal/shitpost/fandom blog

JespurrWizard#6396 | jespurrwizard: my Discord, feel free to friend me if you want to talk because Tumblr’s IM/DM system is terrible for me

Fandom Stuff

@azzie-beastbinder : my MTG roleplay blog following a Bloomburrow rat who lives in Kamigawa (along with the rest of the Dokuchi Reckoners)

@captain-lannery-storm : my MTG roleplay blog for a canon Ixalec character (along with the rest of her fleet)

@living-historian : my MTG roleplay blog following an Innistradi vampire who works in Kamigawa

@menea-the-pharmakon : my MTG roleplay blog following a Theros gorgon who is traveling the planes

@stem-sianamne : my Dragon Ball blog dedicated to the Pride Troopers and my OC because I love them

@tales-of-thyrsus : my MTG roleplay blog following a young goddess from a homebrew plane

@tri-flight : my Flight Rising blog

@voldarens-bane : my MTG roleplay blog following a Torrezone vampire

Occult Stuff

@coding-emoji-spells : oops, another occult blog, but hey, this one's dedicated to emoji spells and other forms of technomagic

@jasper-and-the-forty-servants : my work with the Forty Servants deck-and-servitor-system by Tommie Kelly

@jasper-grimoire : a witchcraft side-side blog where I organize notes and posts I want to keep for later

@jasper-pagan-witch : my witchcraft/pagan blog, feel free to send questions that way

@jasper-polytheist-wizard : a bad advice/shitpost type of magic blog

@jasper-tarot-reader : my tarot reading blog (send an ask but respect the guidelines)

@missouri-witchcraft : a witchcraft side blog for Missouri magic and resources because those are impossible to find

@the-college-of-whispers : my Elder Scrolls pop culture witchcraft blog

Writing, Reading, & Art Stuff

@jasper-book-stash : my bookblr blog to read and review whatever the hell I have

@jasper-explores-selfships : exactly what it says on the tin, let's fucking gooooo

@jasper-graphics : a side blog for creating dividers and similar things! (The divider I use on this post is actually one I made there!)

@jasper-reblogs-art : a blog that I reblog any art I see to

@jasper-the-courteous : my evil and less fucked up side blog inspired by an April Fool's Joke in a Discord server

@owl-writing : my writeblr blog for original works and resources

JasperWritingWitch: my AO3 account (do not follow my AO3 if you’re a minor because I read and write a lot of Mature/Explicit stuff)

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

some people will be like “I wonder why fanfic writers don’t share their works anymore😔” and then this is them when a writer is kind enough to share something they write — as a hobby, for their own enjoyment — with them for free.

some people really don’t realize how privileged they are that they get fanfics for free. imagine having access to something for free because someone is kind enough to share it with you… and then being rude, entitled and an ungrateful pos to that person who was kind enough to share their creation with you for free

“almost 1 year is a lil too much for me” fuck off. fanfic writers don’t owe you anything. one of my favorite fics was updated after 13 years, and what I did is that I thanked the author for choosing to continue the work, I didn’t act like a spoiled toddler by asking why they didn’t update sooner. and even if a writer chooses to abandon their fic permanently with no explanation, that is their choice, their hobby, their decision. they don’t owe your entitled ass anything.

you people let tiktok rot your brains to the point you see everything as content farm and engagement. not a piece of art created by the artist’s love and passion. it’s dystopian.

[jasper-the-menace]

Alright, figured I should post this here. I'm looking for video game recommendations that are not "play Baldur's Gate 3/The Elder Scrolls/Dragon Age games".

Requirements:

The game must be playable on the Playstation 5. I do not have any other game systems nor a gaming PC.

The game must not punish me for keeping it on the lowest difficulty setting. I do not find struggling and having to constantly reload saves to be fun. This also means I do not enjoy Soulslike games; I simply cannot get good so I'm avoiding that.

No shooter games. I am absolute shit at guns in video games and want to avoid it as much as possible.

No required mods. I am technologically illiterate and do not enjoy trying to mod games. If you wholeheartedly believe that a game cannot be played without a specific mod, don't recommend it; I don't want that sort of thing.

Requests:

Action-adventure and/or roleplaying game elements. I prefer both simultaneously.

Character creation, ideally with both customization for the physical appearance and classes or other such things for doing different builds. I prefer things more on the Oblivion side (established classes, attributes, etc) than the Skyrim side (perk points) but could go for either.

Fantasy setting. I prefer magic as an option for my combat, even if it's optional and you can use other kinds of weapons too. Options for fighting are great.

Being able to have the option to play something that is not human is ideal. Ideally there will be many options for playing not human things.

Please let me know what you recommend!

[andhaveapleasanttomorrow]

yesterday I had the thought "visual novel for normal people" (?) and halfway through making this image (which I thought would be really funny) I realized it was completely meaningless

[jasper-the-menace]

Alright so is Wizards of the Coast going to ever cut back on Universes Beyond sets and the speed they're coming out or will I eventually just stop buying new cards from this game because I don't get my lore with it and most of the releases are noncanon yet still fucking up constructed formats. I am tired of having the "look, here's something you enjoyed now officially crossed over in your card game" keys jangled in my face. I am tired of one-way crossovers. I am tired of corporate greed.

[cometsans67]

i hate to be the one to break the news but you should maybe not buy them anywayssssss

WOTC Deadnamed Its Trans Employees During Union Election, Twice

'The actions here are...at odds with the kindness and support I experience daily'

afaik there havent been calls for a boycott from the workers but i wouldnt be willing to support that. u got more skin in the game than me tho i dont really go here

[jasper-the-menace]

Gods dammit, so that's what's going on with the union now. Thanks for the update, I hadn't seen this!

[jasper-the-menace]

Alright so is Wizards of the Coast going to ever cut back on Universes Beyond sets and the speed they're coming out or will I eventually just stop buying new cards from this game because I don't get my lore with it and most of the releases are noncanon yet still fucking up constructed formats. I am tired of having the "look, here's something you enjoyed now officially crossed over in your card game" keys jangled in my face. I am tired of one-way crossovers. I am tired of corporate greed.

[theatsthetic]

female-presenting vitruvian

[theatsthetic]

i appreciate the amount of people reblogging this despite me not really tagging this at all. im glad many of people feel the same anger i do.

[maiasaliger]

Wild Flower

by kei0909modeler

[📷 Instagram] [🐦 Twitter/X]

[fernthefanciful]

@jasper-pagan-witch pspspspsps

[kaioty-summer]

Hey, did y'all see this?

I saw this when running newpipe. But wait, it gets deeper. I clicked on the details buttons and it said as of today, we have 83 days left until Google rolls out this new requirement for apps inside and outside of the google play store. If any developer disagrees with their new terms and fees, they will be blocked!

I'll share some of the info below:

Looks like they're trying to nuke the remaining privacy and freedoms we have left on the internet.

What to do?

-Get your developer friends to not comply to their new guides

- Sign the open letter on the site and take action by checking out the full resources list on their website as well!

To summarize, this is all daunting especially when you feel all alone with unfair and inhumane regulations comming out faster than improvements but we got this working together!

Share the link with your friends, family and anyone who will listen!

Your phone is about to stop being yours. In September 2026, Google will block every Android app whose developer hasn't registered with them.

[yellowmagicalgirl]

If you're in the US, I created a petition to make it easier to contact senators and congressmen.

Google Wants To Control Our Phones

Join 1 people. Google is trying to make people hand over government id in order to make an Android app. If they don't, then that app can't b

If you're not in the US, see if your country is listed here for whom to contact.

[sibmakesart]

rbging this on the main blog cause its so important plz plz sign

[starrynet]

fifa kills whales 💔

[lostlegendaerie]

He's suing them over it for $25M.

Wyland has said any financial recovery from the suit would support public art, ocean conservation, and environmental education through his foundation.

"This should have been an opportunity to show the world that global sports, public art, and environmental stewardship can stand together," he said. "Instead, a landmark was painted over. We want to do our part to make sure that what happened here does not become the standard for how public art is treated in cities across America."

[oblivionloading]

The count of Cheydinhal has a secret vault containing 300,000 pounds of chocolate pudding, but refuses to share because he’s a huge stinky butt munch.

[viralfrog]

[dragongirlbunny]

[lady-ofmischief]

Everyone is fighting a tough battle so reblog to give previous a sword 🗡️

[anarchopuppy]

sometimes being a fan of something means not wanting them to make any more of it

[pastel-pink-psycho]

[caktusjuice-draws]

@jasper-the-menace

[jasper-the-menace]

I knew you were going to @ me on this before I even scrolled down...

[animusbell]

celestia is such a funny character like she's constantly manipulating twilight and friends to do shit instead of just asking and you could arguably frame that as being bc she's a "god" and pushing fate to her design or whatever, except that she engages with the group like a normal and relatable person, which makes it more like villainous machinations, except 90% of this manipulation goes towards things like "I don't want my party to be boring shit again. put my little country girl blorbos in there with zero prep so they fuck it up bad"

[animusbell]

you think you've fucked anything up around princess celestia and she's like heh. no worries. all according to keikaku

[jukashi]

Celestia instantly makes more sense as a character when you ignore the princess stuff and remember that she's a 1000+ years old wizard. Of course she does manipulative trickster stuff to teach moral lessons and/or cause chaos to amuse herself, that's classic wizard behavior. Of course sometimes she's actually socially awkward and bad at personal relationships and has bad ideas that she thought were good that result in her eating shit embarrassing style, that's classic wizard behavior. Of course she lets the aristocrats and nobles run around being assholes she's still running on wizard advisor programming, she's basically trying to merlin the entire upper class of equestria instead of just a king and some knights. "Yeah uuhhh we'll release the incarnation of chaos himself from his ancient prison because we think this shy girl can be friends with him", terrible plan if you're thinking like a ruler, amazing plan if you're thinking like a wizard. Just look at Canterlot 'Castle' for five seconds and ask yourself if that's in any way a castle. No. Wizard tower, yes. Wizard.

[animusbell]

You are so right actually

[blue-dartwing]

Meme time =^.^=

"Nightmare Fuel"

(I have no idea what's going on, and neither do they, but old Herma-Mora is ENCHANTED...)