Jessica Roberts

37 years old. NB, assigned male at birth but really exploring my fem side Considering fully transitioning.

[catchymemes]

[vtmb2spoilers-deactivated202112]

hope u dont mind me keeping ur tags because ur right:

[calmdowncalmdown]

I’ll reblog this every time I see it.

[funkylittlebats]

[ID: a reddit post from Marylandman101.

what does it feel like to do heroin

A reply from [deleted]

Actually this is an obvious question but it’s not what you might think. Let me explain it to you, I’ve been an opiate addict for a long time and tried many drugs. Drugs that are ‘uppers’ have the most ‘obvious’ euphoria. For example if you take adderall/coke/meth/speed/MDMA you will get this shining bright euphoria, self confidence, energy, and other drug-specific feelings (for meth like you are king or for MDMA like you love everyone). However, you owe these drugs back what they delivered to you. After a meth binge, or lots of MDMA use, or staying up all night on coke you will feel like shit. To an extent this aspect is similar to an alcoholic hangover.

On the other hand, for many people who experiment with heroin they are underwhelmed (not including IV usage, but most experimenters rarely ever IV first time). They just feel good, chill, happy, but they feel like this spooky drug ‘heroin’ hasn’t delivered. They are just mellow. Oh obviously it has all been a lie they will think. Heroin isn’t spooky, it’s chill. It’s not addictive like everyone else thinks. It doesn’t make you do stupid shit or stay up all day and hallucinate like amphetamines or coke. It doesn’t empty your serotonin like MDMA or give you a hangover like alcohol. People tend to just think oh, what a nice drug.

So the next day they wake up and everything is normal. No headache or shitty feeling–just a slight afterglow of that nice feeling. Oh it was cheap as well! It only cost $10 for a whole night of being high! I thought people said heroin was expensive? And then next weekend comes… There are all these drugs I could do but I liked heroin. It didn’t fuck me up,‘I could still think clearly. No hangover. No feeling like shit later. I still was awake. It just made me happy and content with life. Oh and it’s only $10! Well, I should get some more for the whole weekend. This is great! I will use Heroin on the weekends now!

Now let’s say this person works and has responsibilities. He knows he can’t go into work drunk, or on MDMA, or high. So he doesn’t. It’s actually simple. But heroin… Well the user might actually find they do better work on heroin. Instead of being sad or grumpy or depressed with his job… he is just… happy. Mellow. Content. Everything is fine and the world is beautiful. It’s raining, it’s dark, I woke up at 5:30AM, I’m commuting in traffic. I would have had a headache, I would have been miserable, I would have wondered how my life took me to this point. This point I’m at right now. But no, no, everything is fine. Life is beautiful. The rain drops are just falling and in each one I see the reflection of every persons life around me. Humanity is beautiful. In this still frame shot of traffic on this crowded bus I just found love and peace. Heroin is a wonder drug. Heroin is better than everything else. Heroin makes me who I wish I was. Heroin makes life worth living. Heroin is better than everything else. Heroin builds up a tolerance fast. Heroin starts to cost more money. I need heroin to feel normal. I don’t love anymore. Now I’m sick. I can’t afford the heroin that I need. How did $10 used to get me high? Now I need $100. That guy that let me try a few lines the first time doesn’t actually deal. Oh I need to find a real dealer? This guy is a felon and carries a gun–he can sell me the drug that lets me find love in the world. No this isn’t working, I need to quit.

To answer your question, heroin feels nice. That’s all, it just feels very nice. You can make the rest up for yourself. Attach your own half-truths to this drug that will show you the world and for a moment you will feel as clever as Faust.

Edit: Thank you for the kind words. I received help and I’m doing well now. Luckily I was able to pull up and get help right before I entered the deadly downward spiral. Some of my friends have not done as well. Sorry to steal the limelight from OP

A reply to this from Ifuxdalion

Reading that was more haunting than any anti-drug campaign that I’ve been exposed to. Thanks. A lot.

End of reddit post.

The third image are tags on tumblr. They read #anti-drug campaigns should be run by recovering addicts #cause like #how are you gonna talk honestly about how a drug affects your life if youve never done it #how can you really communicate what it does to your life if you ignore the reasons people do drugs in the first place? #i dont think anyone’s gonna believe you when you say a drug is bad if you never acknowledge the way the drug makes you feel good #tags

End ID]

[jessica-roberts88]

Never did this personally. But I fucking get it. Just had to share

[jessica-roberts88]

So I’ve recently learned I’m wildly obsessed with 18+ roleplay on Reddit.

And also desperation wetting…

[masterxdanx]

[oberonsson]

Dame Archer kicks McDougal’s Scots ass there in the rain at the Washington Midsummer Renaissance Faire - August 11, 2018 - Photo by Douglas Herring

[anarcho-wormism-deactivated2019]

😮

[garrettauthor]

Oh NO.

[treacleaergia]

me, a sheltered noblewoman: Pray who is that brave knight? Dame Archer:*turns around* me: gasp! *instantly in love*

[dirtyriver]

Alicia Archer

[ex-sang-uination]

my bi heart………

[ohmightysmiter]

I’VE NEVER SEEN THE ADDED PICS

[hrefnatheravenqueen]

[nyx-belial]

*dies*

[garrettauthor]

Oh shit.

[notlostonanadventure]

GAY KNIGHTS

[unicornofdarknessstuff-deactiva]

Fellas I’m real gay

[thecarrott]

@0hheytherebigbadwolf HELP!!

[0hheytherebigbadwolf]

Every June this inevitably winds up back on my dash. And I appreciate that. And I will reblog it. Every time.

[ouroborosmoons-deactivated20260]

[jessica-roberts88]

Seriously though. I never connected the dots until now.

[jessica-roberts88]

It’s my bday in a few days so I finally decided to treat myself with a lovense hush.

[leafinthebreeze-deactivated2026]

[jessica-roberts88]

Pretty accurate tbh.

[loseweightshorts]

Butt workout at home 🏡

[jessica-roberts88]

Posting as a reminder to start doing these

So tired of having the Hank-hill-butt

[jessica-roberts88]

[hellyeahrihannafenty]

Tom Holland does Rihanna’s “Umbrella” on Lip Sync Battle

[liminal-zone]

And reader, she is going to marry that man.

[jessica-roberts88]

Oh wowwwwww

[di-kot-o-me]

[fireheartedpup]

This is the funniest threat we have ever received.

[karadin]

I welcome my Danish overlords

even though my ancestors didn't

[jessica-roberts88]

Got my back blown out today…..

I’m mid 30s and I sneezed while cutting my toenails

[voice-of-illogical-sense]

[flagellant]

this is what a Bodhisattva is

[alexaloraetheris]

Oh, literally!

[english-history-trip]

(Part 2) (Part 3)

Words from this post by @valarhalla

[english-history-trip]

[english-history-trip]

Words from this post by @valarhalla 

[elodieunderglass]

My dear and valued friend, my colleague and comrade, i want to rip the vambraces lovingly off your arms and pack you away in the attic like an off season holiday decoration

[thefloatingstone]

Do you ever think about Doggerland?

Like how fucked up is it that it’s just….. gone.

I tend to forget about it and then when I remember it again I’m like “Oh yeah! There’s like an entire country sized stretch of land that’s just fucking GONE.

well…. “gone”….

[thefloatingstone]

Things I have learned since making this post;

The running theory (I can’t remember if it was definitive proof or not but I try not to make concrete statements on history any more) is that what caused the sinking of Doggerland was not the slow heating up of the Earth leading to a gradual melting of ice and snow causing the rise of the ocean….

What flooded Doggerland was a massive fucking CHUNK of Norway FELL INTO THE OCEAN and it caused the largest tsunami we have physical evidence for on earth and it fucking flooded Doggerland IN ONE SINGULAR DAY with a rush of water so strong, large and powerful it literally had the force to rip people to shreds when it hit them

[kedreeva]

Doggerland on Wikipedia

[brightwanderer]

I do think about Doggerland, fairly frequently! And I feel it’s important to point out that its disappearance absolutely was because of “the slow heating up of the Earth leading to a gradual melting of ice and snow causing the rise of the ocean”. By the time of the tsunami, the land area would already have been reduced to a handful of small islands.

In general, a true tsunami (caused by displaced water) is never going to permanently submerge an area of land, because the water displacement is temporary and it will return to where it came from (causing huge damage on the way, of course). However, with islands that were already barely above sea-level, it’s definitely possible that such a huge inundation just obliterated their topsoil and left them below water level.

It’s hard to say, though, because the end of the last Ice Age was a wild time for water moving around and getting into places it shouldn’t. In particular, as the glaciers melted you’d often get huge meltwater lakes forming behind dams of ice and rubble which might then burst, suddenly dumping nearly inconceivable amounts of water all over the downstream terrain. One of these bodies of water, Lake Agassiz in North America, was so huge that it covered multiple states, and it’s thought that it drained very suddenly into the Atlantic ocean about 8000 years ago (i.e. contemporary with the flooding of Doggerland), dumping so much water into the ocean that global sea levels rose 1-2m over the course of a couple of years.

And if you’re wondering - yes, it’s theorised that this event, or the combination of the others like it, was responsible for the flood myths that exist in so many cultures. Coastal and lowland settlements around the world would have found themselves in a period of time where the sea just kept rising - not overnight, but inexorably and seemingly without any end in sight. Many, many cultures would have retreated to higher ground, only to find a few months later that the water was once more lapping at their doors.  In some ways I find that even more profoundly terrifying than the idea of a wall of water sweeping everything away.

[loving-n0t-heyting]

Has everyone seen xkcd Time?

You should probably see xkcd Time

http://geekwagon.net/projects/xkcd1190/mobile/

xkcd Time - at your own pace

[o-craven-canto]

That’s not the only case!

That region had tropical climate, even at the peak of the last glaciation. There could have been a thriving agricultural civilization in those bygone river valleys 10,000 years before it started all over again in the Near East, and we wouldn’t know.

[cansomebodytellmewhatsgoingon]

Oh, dude, the amount of outburst floods that happened at the end of or during the Pleistocene is OBSCENE. The Altai Floods, which created giant ripple currents like sixty feet tall. The Black Sea Deluge Hypothesis, which could explain the lack of Paleolithic sites on Turkey’s northern coast because they all drowned. The Missoula Floods. The Missoula Floods. Floods with the height of skyscrapers that would hit you like a truck going down the highway. Floods that were 50x more river flow than the Amazon and happened in an area 38x smaller. Floods that happened SO often and were SO strong that they literally created the Channeled Scablands and is partially why the area isn’t very forested because all the topsoil got scrubbed away.

And don’t even get me started on the Zanclean Flood, because WOW

[pied-piper-pluto]

Someone else might have already mentioned Some Facts About Doggerland, a piece of writing that gives me huge emotions every time I read it, but if not please enjoy!

[mumblingsage]

To fellow Doggerland fans, I also want to shout out Julia Blackburn’s Time Songs: Journeys in Search of a Submerged Land.

[mumblingsage]

In honor of this post coming back around on my dashboard, here are more maps of Doggerland through the ages, from Barry Cunliffe’s Europe Between the Oceans.

[elalmadelmar]

The one that always gets me hardest is the theorized flooding of the Mediterranean. In other words, at one point the Mediterranean was much smaller and most of that basin was dry land. There’s an old series of fantasy books exploring what a civilization on the floor of what’s now the Mediterranean sea might have looked like (and being fantasy, there’s magic and psychic animals and such; being older, I can’t exactly recommend it since it’s a Product Of Its Time in some very unfortunate ways), and ending with the crisis of their whole world flooding as the last remaining fragment of the land barrier across the Strait of Gibraltar crumbles away and lets the Atlantic in.

It’s hard to know what might have been down there, since we can’t exactly do archaeology on the seafloor.

[myriadplethorae]

… since we can’t exactly do archaeology on the sea floor YET

[jessica-roberts88]

So I’ve been in some of the best mental space of my life. (Atleast since I can remember) for the last few weeks.

The biggest contributor to this is that I quit drinking liquor…. I was drinking way too much and I physically and mentally started to feel it take its toll on me. I was irritable, physically felt like shit, mental cobwebs, and just generally feeling like shit Ontop of that just constantly craving my next drink.

I quit, 2 weeks ago; not cold turkey, I’m still drinking a bit of wine and beer but no where even close to what I was, which was 2 bottles a week minimum for the past several years. But I haven’t touched a bit of liquor since.

Let me tell you….. what a difference. Literally all of those negatives went away after like the 4th day and now I’m feeling so good!

In the meantime, regaining a bit of self control I also haven’t pleasured myself like a “man” since I quit the liquor….

Dont worry. I’m still having regular orgasms… which is yet another bonus to my mental state.

The “sissygasms”, gods I hate that term… but I’m at a loss for another word here, are so satisfying and leaving me in a state of bliss and clarity.

Also gradually accepting that I’ll never be a specimen of femininity, so I can either just lean back into the hyper masculine “gay man”. Or try and weave in a few strands of androgyny. Of which I’m currently leaning into the latter.

I FINALLY got some jeans that fit me so well… (American eagle).

A simple task for some, but I’ve been struggling for years to find the proper fit and length as I have a 36” inseam…. Tall gurl struggles Minor thing but feels like such a huge victory!

Really just wanted to get this out, Mostly for my own reasons of sorting things out.

Time to have a smoke, a glass of wine, and catch up on some rings of power.

Hope yall have a good night!

-Jessica

[gymbunnycandiehart]

7 Ideas to Feel Girly that You Should Try

Many of you know what it’s like.  You are expected to be a man.  You ARE a man.  At least, you’re male.  But you want to be girly.  You want to wear dresses, skirts, lingerie, heels, cute outfits, etc.  You want pretty hair, smooth skin, a softer walk and gentler mannerisms.  You also want to be accepted as your girly self, but that’s not going to happen–at least not publicly and maybe not in your lifetime.  You have family or friends, work, school, and social activities where you’d like to feel girly, but you know you must portray “man.”

That’s tough, isn’t it?  But is all lost?  I don’t think so and I want to share with you seven ideas that can help you feel girly when you must be “boy.”

Before I post, I want to give a quick nod of gratitude to the many fabulous girly boys who chimed in and shared their thoughts.  This list is a combined effort and not one i could have come up with on my own.  It’s also not an exhaustive list.  Also, I would encourage you not to try and implement everything.  Just try a few of these ideas, even if it is one at a time.

1) Smooth Out Your Image

Get smooth and fine.  I personally enjoy shaving my upper legs and trimming my lower legs.  I wish I could shave the entire bit.  I keep my chest, topside of hands, and armpits shaven and even shave the underside of my forearms.  Shave your groin too and keep the hair above that area short and groomed.  Additionally, you could try your hand at plucking eyebrows to a thin, but subtle arch.  I used to do this without any question. Just make sure you pluck eyebrows at a time when no one will see you with temporary reddish plump from the plucking.  It goes without saying that man-hair problems should be taken care of anyway.  Keep the nose trimmed and the ears plucked.  Ear hair is gross.  Other options include, but are not limited to body lotions and conditioners, bleaching what hair you keep, and being conscientious about all areas of hygiene.  Mostly, when it’s said and done, simply clean yourself up.  Your outer boy will benefit just as much as your inner girl–it just feels great and feels clean. 

2) Spoil Your Girly Self

Learn to enjoy the spa treatment.  Take scented bubble baths, do facemasks, and moisturize with girly lotions.  Paint your toenails feminine colors and use clear polish on your fingernails.  Don’t forget to clean your cuticles, having them softly tapered back.  You could also try some slight growth that you could file to a more oval shape.  Use a little foundation on your face or maybe a bit of eyeliner or eye shadow.  Try lip gloss instead of chap stick and keep it on you to use at any point during a day.  Fruity flavors and perhaps some glittery gloss can add some excitement.  If you’re feeling it, be a little more risky with some subtle mascara, blush, or lipstick.  Get a pedicure or manicure.  Get yourself some perfumes to spray on religiously.  The point is, treat your inner girl like a princess.  You she deserves it!

3) Be Girly Under There

If you want to feel girly, there may not be any better option than panties.  You can go as fem as you wish and as small as you can handle.  No one will ever see, unless you show them.  Learn to enjoy a good Tuck.  Keeping the little boy in check and his friends up and out of the way might be a bit of a pain at times, but it’s so worth it not to have a bulge.  A step up would be stockings or pantyhose.  What a rush when you opt out of socks!  And then, there is the bomb: the bra.  It’s not always going to work out as an option because of whatever kind of shirt you choose to wear.  Some other secret options are things like girly temporary tattoos, garters, feminine socks, chemises, panty liners, or maybe a choker underneath a collar and tie.

4)  Embrace Androgyny

This might be my favorite.  Girls clothes that can pass as men’s clothes.  Women’s jeans are a great go-to.  I have a few pair of womens jeans in boot cut and skinny.  There are some options that won’t work, but there are plenty of options that can.  Do your research.  Also, although women’s shorts are generally short, there are long shorts made for women.  I almost got a pair of women’s cargo shorts once.  I own a women’s swim short that passes.  Like jeans, you can find cute shirts, and unless someone can tell that the buttons are on the opposite side, you’re golden.  And alas, my absolute favorite.  I’ll admit, I’m quite stricken by women’s sneakers.  What I love about shoes is that people don’t normally look down at feet, and if they do, they’ll either not care or not pay attention.  Trust me, there is no one going around checking to see if you have on narrow shoes or to see if your shoes have pink highlights.  I’ve walked through streets, malls, shops, parks, ballparks, etc. etc. in Keds, cheer shoes, or flats without even the slightest second look (even though i kind of wished for it).  I have a whole collection of women’s sneakers and wear them frequently to various public spaces.  Never once have I been questioned for it–even in the cutest pairs.  If you wear something larger than a 12 in women’s shoes, companies like New Balance and Skechers make size 13 now and many companies are finally making 12′s as a regular.  Thank goodness!  But it’s not just tennis shoes.  There are several casual flat options that are simply narrower versions of men’s styles.  Obviously, if you’re trying to maintain a guy profile, you can’t wear heels, but you can try subtle platforms. Androgyny may not be as sexy as “all out” but it’s great to have the option.  even if it does look semi-manly, at least you know.  I could continue to write more, but I must move on.

5) Accesorize (yeah, I didn’t spell that right, oh well)

I’ve not done much with this one myself, but I can see where it would be awesome.  Rings, earrings, belly button rings, toerings, necklaces, bracelets, ankle bracelets, or watches.  I’d love to have a girl-size apple watch and band.  It’s your choice in how much you’d like to glam it up.  Purses might be an option too if it could pass as a man-bag.  What about a girlish backpack or sling? What about a semi-girlish phone case, computer bag, or a women’s wallet?  Here’s an idea!  Care to try a hair band?  Or if your hair is long enough, a scrunchie.  Another option might be ladies’ eyewear frames or sunglasses.  In cold weather, ladies gloves, scarves, or toboggans.  How about cute hats or visors?  When you’re at the beach or pool, use girlish towels.  When working out, girls’ lifting gloves.  The idea here is to add a little something girly that makes you feel special.

6) Practice Feminine Posture and Gestures

So, you want to feel girly?  Start acting like it.  Talk softer, move more gracefully, sit more precisely.  Cross your legs like a woman when you sit.  Get into a car as if you have on a dress.  Walk narrow as if on a thin line.  Limp your wrists and point your toes.  Act like you have hips.  Twirl your hair if you’ve got it.  You may not want to camp it up too much, but you can certainly improve your mannerisms subtly over time.  I definitely could use some help in this area.  I’d say that the hardest part is developing the habit.

7) Do Girly Things 

The options here are perhaps endless, but I’ll try to give a few.  I like the idea of keeping a diary and writing in girlish strokes with pink or purple pens.  Put little hearts for dots on your i’s.  Doodle flowers.  Watch chick-flicks (I know, that sounds sexist).  Window shop often.  Go to women’s shops frequently and take in every opportunity to go into those special places with your girlfriend or wife.  With your significant other, cuddle like a girl would and be tender with your kisses.  And, of course, it wouldn’t be a Gym Bunny Candie post if I didn’t say it: “Dress girly for a workout.”  Even if it is in the sanctity of your home, wear a sports bra and yoga pants, cute tops, maybe even a tennis skirt.  It’s not about having a sissy workout.  It’s about transforming your body while luxuriating in the feminine garments.  And don’t forget your girly sneakers!  LOL  One thing you could always try is early morning or late night walk or runs in your girly gear.  I live on a golf course and so I will sometimes get girly and run the course at night on the golf cart path.  It’s such a rush! There are just too many options.  I’m sure you could think of some.

Well, that’s what I have to offer, and by tomorrow, I’m sure to come up with dozens of other ideas that didn’t come out.  But I hope these ideas help you in some way to bring a little girliness into your mundane male life, that, for some logical reason, you cannot escape.

Do you have anything to add?  I’m sure it’s a good one.

Have a great girly day, girlfriends.  Love you all!

CandieHart

[gymbunnycandiehart]

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