Here To Funk You Up

I'm Jess. I'm foxy. Books, coffee, writing, poetry, horror, Quentin Tarantino, burritos, elephants. Chaser for the Long Beach Funky Quaffles. Gryffindor ENFP i n s t a g r a m L B F Q

[miss-nala]

When you think you’re done washing the dishes but you look over and see them big ass pots on the stove

[v0bis-deactivated20170428]

When you fill them with water to “soak” ️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️

[jessicalbfq]

CALLED. THE. FUCK. OUT.

[gqa1]

Reblog In 5 seconds for good luck

[nullelemental]

​this worked last night lets go for round two

[fyeahbroadway]

[orangeoutlet]

[anthonyyahya-deactivated2018051]

That’s honestly fucking terrifying.

[jessicalbfq]

Ain’t no one trying to go anywhere near your bitch ass, Carol.

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[isamaegreenleaf]

Last comment same thing. Sorry to the next person who sees this. I just can’t risk it. I have things I need to do before my life becomes hell. Lol

[nnfirnid]

man i fucking hate yall who tf put this up knowing damn well we all gonna reblog it im heated im really sick af bout this 

[modelinterrupted]

I don’t play that shit lol sorry

[latenightsugar]

WHyyyy

[badgyal-k-deactivated20190901]

Sorry everyone

[just-jay25]

If only if only the woodpecker sighs the bark on the tree was as soft as the sky why the wolf waits below hungry and lonely he cries to the moon if only if only

[grandpaq]

I’ll be damned if I end up like ol boys dirty, rotten, pig stealing great great grandfather

[thewitchofwonderlust]

I’m just too superstitious!

[ilikecheeeeesebih-deactivated20]

Can’t risk it, Y’all saw what happened to Stanley Yelnats

[callmedeku24]

I ain’t taking no chances sorry y'all

[quidsecrets]

“Justin Bogart on the Lost Boys is sooo my type and I love his smile.”

[jessicalbfq]

Tru, J.B. is babely

[nylarac]

this took a surprising turn

[damarshen]

Lmaooo

[jessicalbfq]

This...was nice...?

[quidsecrets]

“ That episode of Spongebob Squarepants where Patrick says “WHO ARE YOU YOU PEOPLE!?” That’s Jessica Ward about quidsecrets right now.”

[jessicalbfq]

God. Too fucking true

[quidsecrets]

“ Someone here has accused me of falsifying quidsecrets about Jessica ward and now I am torn between preserving my integrity and preserving my anonymity. Quite the quandary you have placed me in, you accuser, you.“

[jessicalbfq]

WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON

[jessicalbfq]

Fuq, I got into Musical.ly.

[jessicalbfq]

I haven't posted on Tumblr in forever, but I got a new shirt and my cheekbones could cut somebody, fight me.

[quidsecrets]

“ Whoever wrote in about Jessica Ward’s trading card is a lying liar. I submitted the secret that was on the card, but not that post.”

[jessicalbfq]

WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING

[quidsecrets]

“ Jessica Ward is my new quidcrush, because confidence is hella sexy. Also, c'mon, pink hair is righteous.”

[jessicalbfq]

EXCUSE ME, WHAT

[jessicalbfq]

What people think witches do: Conjure demons, raise the dead, hail satan, eat small children, ride on broomsticks

What we really do: Drink a bunch of tea, use lavender scented everything, light a shit ton of incense and set off fire alarms, take baths with a bunch of herbs in them, buy tons of candles in every color possible, curse at our tarot cards, and hoard crystals and essential oils.

[imawitchywitch]

🔮

[anarchetypalarchive]

i was talking to my cousin yesterday and he was talking about an accidental mistake he was dealing with, and proceeded to describe it as, “i picked a whole fuckin’ bouquet of whoopsie-daisies” and tbh i’m still thinking about it

[fanonical]

tbh i wanted the fantastic beasts ending to just be newt smuggling jacob out in his suitcase and jacob travelling with him as his assistant for a bit