“yes i had a friend that had a bucket to kick and i am sorry that i had to make you ask about it again”
— wealthy relative

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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Cosmic Funnies
Jules of Nature

Product Placement

oozey mess
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Three Goblin Art
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$LAYYYTER
ojovivo

Kaledo Art

Andulka
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Peter Solarz
taylor price
tumblr dot com
will byers stan first human second
RMH
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@jk6i
“yes i had a friend that had a bucket to kick and i am sorry that i had to make you ask about it again”
— wealthy relative
yes i had a friend that had a bucket to kick and i am sorry that i had to make you ask about it again
wealthy relative
my friend @sky_mashups just released one of his yearly megamixes
give it your listens and spread it
oh god archduke franz ferdinand watch out he’s got a gun OH NO HE’S GOT AIRPODS IN HE CANT HEAR ME
“I’m just going to watch Shrek in my head.”
As a little kid, I was SOOOOOO damn obsessed with Shrek.
I mean the kind of obsessed where I’d watch it over and over again days in a row. It was all I ever wanted to watch.
It got to the point where I had memorised it word-for-word, and beat-for-beat. This meant that, somehow, I could watch it in my head—timed perfectly. No fast forwarding, no skipping.
Now this was fine for car trips and such, because my dad would be like “Hey do you want some colouring-in to do?” And id be like “Nah, I’m going to watch Shrek in my head.”
Ocassionally my dad would ask where I was up to in the movie—just to check on me.
Youre probably thinking Huh that’s weird but cool I guess?
Wrong. Sort of.
It got so bad that I’d watch it in my head at night before I went to sleep. My dad would literally check on me at night, notice I was blankly staring up at the ceiling, and have to yell “Stop watching Shrek and go to sleep!”
I cant remember how this faded from being one of my abilities, but it sure was cool while it lasted.
But for a while, Shrek really WAS my life.
just VIGOROUSLY rolling my eyes
don't mind me
*old man voice* back in my day tik tok was a ke$ha song
ITS SO CUTE I HAVE TO REBLOG IT AGAINN
I WANNA BE THIS KIND OF PARENT
#i was surprised this didnt end in some sort of murder #i’ve been on tumblr too long
“Ye”
Next time you go walking around barefoot in the water…
NOPE
No worries, that’s a Bobbit Worm. They live on the ocean floor, and unless you’re able to withstand a ton of pressure, you likely wouldn’t have your toesies nipped off by one since they live deeper than people walk on the ocean floor. Bobbit Worms are kinda cool. And they were named after Laurena Bobbit, who cut off her abusive husband’s penis and threw it out of her car window as she drove off.
wat
in theory its super bad when straight dudes go “hey ur a lesbian? we both like girls we’re the same!” but in reality this has happened twice and most recently was today when a guy i was training in the frame shop went “oh you’re gay?” “yea” “that’s cool. it’s cool that you told me. we both like girls and star wars so it’s nice that we have a shift together :)” like god damn it brett you’re so respectful and thoughtful with your goddamned words
the posts that are like “straight men can never love a woman like a lesbian” are cool jokes and stuff but u gotta really appreciate dudes who have no idea what its like to be gay but try their best to try and relate. “we both like hot ladies” you know what, ryan? that’s close enough. i appreciate that.
@staff wench, ha! for what reason is thou angry? because mine own pussy poppeth sev’rely and thine own does not?
You wake up tomorrow to find yourself in the world of the last video game you played. How screwed/lucky are you?
red dead redemption 2
i'd fucking THRIVE
so tumblr's dead now, right?
my bf has many interesting stories and observations from his new job as a 911 operator
my favorite is how meandering people are, even in the midst of a terrible emergency
they respond to “what is the emergency” with “well, the thing is, four weeks ago–”
and then he’s like “WHAT IS THE EMERGENCY RIGHT NOW”
and they’re like “so what happened this morning was, i said to my wife, i said–”
“WHAT IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING AT THIS MOMENT”
“oh i’m having a heart attack”
my second favorite is how specific he has to get sometimes
like, “what is your emergency?”
“i’m sitting in a pool of blood.”
“… is it… your blood?”
“yes i think so”
“do you know where it’s coming from?”
“probably the stab wound”
“have you been stabbed?”
“oh yah definitely”
In all fairness shock is a hell of a drug