It's Like Deja Vu All Over Again

My name is John. You can call me John, Johnny, Johnny P, or whatever you'd like. All you read or see here is what is going on in my head. I hope you enjoy it in some aesthetically pleasing or personal way. -Johnny

[sleepin]

[oddlydrawndream]

Crush: *Talks to someone*

Me: I lost them. They’re clearly in love with that person. How did this happen?

[coffiend-jackalope]

Real Genius

[those]

[ruthyless-deactivated20140511]

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

[tardis-mind-palace]

Your brother is the best

[elrondbaggins]

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

[aliceinpunderland-blog]

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

[basedpotatochip]

[clapifyougottheclap]

dam son

[hekacute-deactivated20141230]

I went to high school with a kid who would only drink out of a baby bottle. He brought a large baby bottle to school every day. At first, we thought that he was using it to sneak alcohol or something, but he wasn’t. He would bring it filled with chocolate milk and then fill it up with Coca-Cola and Sprite during lunch. He’d buy a can of each and mix them together. Like I said, it was a large bottle.

I didn’t know the kid that well and I didn’t have any classes with him so I never really talked to him that much. I knew his name. His name was Kevin. Sometimes I’d see him at parties on the weekends. He still had his baby bottle. He would fill it with beer and rum.

He dated my sister’s friend, Emily, for a little while. I had known Emily for a long time. She had been a friend of my sister’s since they were five or six. They were really good friends. She spent a lot of time at our house for sleepovers and stuff. Sometimes she would pee the bed, but I never made fun of her for it. I think most older brothers would have loved the opportunity to make fun of their sister’s friend for peeing the bed and I think she really appreciated that I never mentioned it even though I definitely knew about it because after the sixth or seventh time, my parents started paying me to clean everything up instead of having to do it themselves.

I asked Emily why Kevin only ever drank out of a baby bottle and she said that she didn’t know. They had only been dating for a very short time at that point and she didn’t want to bring it up and offend him or anything. I asked her to tell me if she ever found out. They broke up right after that and I kind of forgot about it because Kevin stopped going to school. I don’t know if he transferred or dropped out, but I never saw him at lunch or any parties after that.

I hadn’t thought about him in a long time, but Emily happened to mention him while she was over at our house recently and I immediately remembered the baby bottle thing.

“Did you ever find out why he drank out of that bottle?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, he told me why,” Emily said. “He used it because he heard that babies that drink out of bottles for too long or drink sweet drinks out of them get really bad teeth problems. He wanted all of his teeth to go bad so that they would fall out and he would be able to fit a softball in his mouth. He said that he wanted to have the world record for being the first person to be able to put a whole softball in his mouth and he wouldn’t be able to do that with all of those teeth in the way.”

[pluginduck]

What the fuck did I just read

[rahmagical]

what in fresh hell

[roadhoggies-deactivated20200531]

[the-absolute-funniest-posts]

I walk a lonely road the only one that I have ever known

[passthecavasier]

The Pacific Northwest is fucking Perfect

[halleydoedog]

Wanna see this

[inthroughthesunroof]

#@ my mutuals who live here: how do you not break down and cry constantly????#pacific northwest  (tags @ecouter-bien)

We do, you just can’t tell with all the rain.

[alchemyalice]

man, no matter how good or bad the movie ends up being, the editor of this trailer deserves an award

I’ve seen it twice now in theaters, and the rhythmic and narrative coherence of the whole thing PUMPS ME UP 

(especially in contrast to the fucking mess of the Transformers trailer that inevitably followed both times, and consisted solely of loud french horn honks and crashes interspersed occasionally with meaningless overwrought dialogue delivered with zero conviction)

in any case, I’m going to now forever associate that Kanye song with Charlize Theron pummeling a man with a freezer door, and I have no complaints about that

[imthedoctortobiasfunke]

the song is a mashup of personal Jesus by depeche mode and black skinhead by kanye, its on soundcloud by fa$ion $en$e and its called personal yeezus

its so fuckin good y’all 

[alchemyalice]

wow first of all I was not expecting this post to blow up, I’m glad other people appreciate good trailer editing

and secondly THANK YOU FOR THE INFO ON THE MASHUP, YESSSS, I’ve had it stuck in my head all week and it is gr9

[nehirose]

LOOK MORE INFORMATION & also just the trailer again because nnnnnnnhhh.

[pawnees]

parks and recreation + text posts | 2/?

[twitterlols]

[audreynical2]

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

As if I need a reason to buy RC cola besides the fact that I’m broke and it’s the first mixer I see in the liquor store

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

Ok @ruff pointed out that RC cola isn’t even fucking verified and that’s honestly such an aesthetically on brand move for them

[lagonegirl]

[3liza]

[mille-marteaux]

[thewolveswolf]

[freetimefase-deactivated2018032]

I may have laughed a little too hard

[jeemyjamz]

YO WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?!?!?!

[juggiexbets]

CUZ THEY IN LOOOOVE

[theinturnetexplorer]

[sarcasmismydrugs]

This professor gets extra credit.