[turnipfritters]

you can beat up a skeleton and steal their arms to use as a weapon in the new zelda

[witchjock-deactivated20221208]

you can do it in real life if you’re not a fucking coward

[slimshaytan]

guys dwayne the rock johnson released a motivational alarm clock app called the rock clock. dwayne the rock johnson will wake you up with inspirational videos and messages. all he wants is 4 u to achieve ur goals

[aztechnology]

I GOOGLED IT’S REAL AND NOW I’M A BELIEVER

[cloudruler-old]

[anderswasrightt]

but what if in the rock’s time zone it’s 6am but in my time zone it’s fucking 2am 

[digital-gecko-deactivated201802]

YOU WAKE WHEN THE ROCK WAKES

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[geniusoflove]

wee snaw

[leluh]

snaw wee

[geniusoflove]

you fool. you absolute buffoon. you think you can challenge me in my own realm? you think you can rebel against my authority? you dare come into my house and upturn my dining chairs and spill coffee grounds in my Keurig? you thought you were safe in your chain mail armor behind that screen of yours. I will take these laminate wood floor boards and destroy you. I didn’t want war. but i didn’t start it.

[cakejam]

“just one more video then i’ll go to sleep”

[saddest-cat-hours]

[dogmuzzle-deactivated20170328]

me at the dentist

dentist: when was the last time you flossed?

me: bro u were THERE

[discreet45]

[bigeisamazing]

game night with the bros

[dinuguan]

edward gamer hands

[iasipscreenshots]

[naptop]

Jicken

[yourangelonline-deactivated2026]

[riviere-libre]

This still fucking cracks me up

[mitski2020]

you have not experienced true fear until a poster falls down in the middle of the night

[camdeezy]

One time I thought a poster had fallen down in the middle of the night, but when I turned on my light, it actually was an opossum that fell through my ceiling into my room. So, that’s actually true fear.

[shasta-brah]

oh.

[finiancal-crisis-yuri]

Nah that’s free possum

[crtter]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[fakehermes-deactivated20170207]

[drdemented-deactivated20191023]

*starts typing on bottom of shoe*

Hacker voice: I’m in.

[nebuvoid]

confused person looking at snow prints: who the fcuk strapped fucking keyboards to their shoes

[aurayafrost]

police detective examines footprints leading away from the crime ‘why did we ever anger the machines,’ he asks himself sorrowfully

[seriousjones]

tfw you only have time to play animal crossing at 3 AM when everything’s closed

[fuckkkkkkkktumblah-deactivated2]

JUST GO TO THE DS SETTINGS AND CHANGE THE TIME SMH YALL R SO DUMB

[seriousjones]

please don’t lie to isabelle

[manateeinthesea]

[veeranger]

this is the Godzilla of Pleasant Dreams, reblog to have good dreams tonight

[treba-neco-napise]

good dreams??? finally???

[everythingfox]

“I take my cat on adventures but he just sleeps right through them”

(Source)

[tohkyo]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BhPgf2lhaC-/

[nowacking]

I have exactly 11 questions

[coughloop]

i dont, mind your business

[a-waste-of-time]

ok why is this cat giving me strong jeff goldblum vibes 

[killerkitty707]

“Yoink” is the opposite of “Yeet”

[wierdrocks]

But it’s just as fast