Literally just a guy

[lungmold]

Drew a few animals.

[doublecounter]

did jax accidentally kill a kid

1. low tolerance to alcohol

2. this.

3. his room replicating one of a little girl's

4. shit

5. double shit

it would be interesting if this theory was true, and gooseworx made it so that his crime haunted him, even in the digital circus (e.g. girlish and childish bedroom).

[queen0fm0nsterz]

The concept of abstraction being potentially calming and even blissful as it is happening to you is possibly one of the most beautifully fucked up thing they could have gone with. Imagine you reach rock bottom, becoming desperate for ANYTHING to lift you up, and that happens. You don't understand it at all, but suddenly you feel calm. Good. After all that pain, wouldn't you embrace any relief with open arms?

[ehwazazi]

"One Last Terrible Thing"

[ace-a-sketch]

Esther from dimension 20, coolest npc ever made

[rachiecrown]

How about some Cleo and Pearl?

Work has freed me. I am back on my AU grind

[mxmarsbars]

curiosity killed the cleo! X3

[zhukzucraft]

you ever get so inspired by a 20-second clip that you start a YT channel over it?

merr crimas

[justawizardwithafrog]

Long post about what kinds of wings the bad kids would have, and what kind of bird their race would be like, I don't know,d20 bird post.

Elves are based off lighter birds, think sparrows, starlings, swallows, that kind of thing. they have smaller wings, due to their bone's being hollow, and being a generally lighter/smaller species, but longer flight feathers compared to the size of their wings. They have thin feathers along the back of their neck, back, and sometimes on their cheeks and ears. Their wings/feathers come in shades of grey, navy, blue, and white, with an almost iridescent hue.

Teiflings have corvid-like wings, specifically larger and thicker. Their wings incredibly strong, with a large wingspan. Their wings come in all kinds of colours, since teiflings themselves have so much variety, but fig's in particular are black with white around the top (similar to an Australian magpie).

Orc wings are much broader and larger to counteract their weight. They have Passive Soaring wings, and are made to fly for long periods of time. They have slightly thinner feathers on their back, and some have small feathers down their legs. Their wings look fairly similar to an eagle's, apart from having lighter brown feathers.

Humans have wings most similar to a Landfowl (chickens, turkeys, guineafowls, etc.). They're not the best flyers, but some kinds are better than others. Almost all humans can fly for a very short period of time, but unless one has specifically trained and has the proper wings for it, they often cannot get far. Their wings are short and rounded, and their takeoffs are loud. They come in a large variety of colours, but are most commonly seen in shades of black, grey, brown, and orange.

Goblin wings are similar to a swift or swallow's, thin, tapering to a point. They are made to fly for long periods of time, landing very rarely. They have a small, forked tail, and small feathers on their belly and crotch area. Their feathers come in shades of grey, and sometimes brown.

[the-muppet-joker]

AITA for making a scene at breakfast after my ex wife revealed to me that she is Batman?

I (37 J) met my ex-wife, Bryce(38 F), for breakfast this morning to discuss the state of our relationship and the possibilities of several accidental extramarital pregnancies (it's been complicated).

Some backstory: I had recently had an unexplained episode of vomiting after sharing wine with my lover, Kermit (ageless, muppet). I was given mouth-to-mouth by Batman (38 F), who had broken into my apartment to save me, somehow aware of my plight. She stayed the night to make sure I was okay, and in the morning, she briefly had an episode of vomiting herself, which she explained by telling me she was pregnant. This led me to two horrifying conclusions:

1. I had gotten Batman pregnant via mouth-to-mouth CPR

2. I myself must be pregnant, as I had also had unexplained vomiting the night before

This was the reason I had to meet with Bryce (also pregnant), to explain that we now had 3 children on the way, rather than 1. However, as I started to explain the situation, she cut me off.

"I'm Batman." Huh???

"And you weren't vomiting because you were pregnant. Kermit poisoned you. That's why he's been missing. He's hiding from justice. He's hiding from me."

Reddit, it was at this point I lost it. To hide such a thing for so long? Batman, for context, is a notorious muppet-hater, and I, for context, am something of a muppet-lover. She was throwing the objects of my affection into Arkham Assylum, right under my nose! And now, she was baselessly accusing my own love of poisoning me, which he would NEVER do. Kermit the Frog is a good man, and a passionate lover.

I had entered a Joker Rage in the Bob Evans and had jumped on the table next to us, howling and kicking the shit out of the biscuits and gravy, before I realized I needed to calm down a little. It was too late. Bryce was crying, and she got up and left (lowkey dining and dashing!) I called after her, but she never turned around. I don't know reddit. I was in shock.

I completely ruined breakfast, scared the staff and customers at the Bob Evans, and brought my pregnant ex wife to tears. But I feel my reaction was justified because it was such shocking news. I mean, how could I have known she was Pregnant Batman all along????

So, AITA?

[starlitmyre]

[justawizardwithafrog]

this is going on my wall next time I have access to a printer

[roundtriptojupiter]

dropout adding a “pay us more money if you want to” tier is the funniest shit i’ve seen all year. here we are in this age of extortion and dropout is dealing with the unique problem of “we don’t want to charge people more but people just want to give us more money???”

[misterbrick42]

Company effortlessly demonstrates that all problems related to subscription-based services are entirely the fault of the company behind them

[razzmothazz]

posting a lone emo fah-biaan because i was too lazy and tired to finish a drawing i had of him being emo with fig

[haarute]

me: i can't do anything... i don't know what my life is anymore...

the jacob wysocki tulpa manifesting inside my brain:

[teaboot]

Wait what's a buildings fire evacuation plan if you aren't supposed to use the elevator to get down

[lazodiac]

You go down the stairwell/fire escape. Is that weird?

[teaboot]

But what if you have a walker or a wheelchair??

[durpacerangerrogjro]

in america at least, in this situation, there isnt one. either your loved ones or the firemen can get you out using the emergency fire escapes or stairs, or you die 

[teaboot]

That's fucking horrific, thank you

[official-lucifers-child]

“fun” little story:

last summer my friend who is an amazingly talented artist and i were in this super tall building, and she’s in a wheelchair and i’m pushing her around the room. it’s an art exhibit and some of her art was chosen to be showcased there and so it’s all fine and dandy until suddenly an alarm starts going off

a FIRE ALARM

everyone starts running for the stairs and my friend just looks at me with this forlorn look on her face

“i can’t go down the stairs”

but i’m a stubborn bitch “i’ll carry you”

“what about my chair? it’s too expensive for me to be able to get another one if i can’t get this one back”

“i’ll carry that too”

and i did. we went to the stairs (by then most people from our floor were gone) and i lifted her up in a fireman’s carry over my shoulder and then lifted her chair up and used the ridiculous amount of adrenaline that was coursing through my veins to make it down approximately 20 half-flights of stairs until we met some people exiting lower floors, one of which who kindly took the chair. I changed positions so i was holding my friend bridal-style which was, somehow, easier and the person who took her wheelchair (with her permission to handle it of course) accompanied me to the ground floor and then out the doors

basically there is no real protocol for people who can’t use the stairs in an emergency. it’s up to the people with them, if anyone, to help them or the person to somehow make it down the stairs alone, unassisted

thank fuck that it was just a faulty alarm system, because if i was unable to carry her down those stairs and the building was on fucking fire???? then i don’t know what would have happened to her, but i don’t think it would have been very good.

it’s fucking ridiculous and ableist to the absolute max.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

I use a cane. When I did a day-long fire safety training at my northeast American university (UMass Amherst), I asked that exact same question: “what am I supposed to do if the fire alarm goes off and I’m in my lab on the twelfth floor?” 

the fire marshal hemmed and hawed for a while and then said to take the elevator- you’re supposed to leave it free for the fire department to use and they want able-bodied people out fast not waiting for elevators. if the fire alarm has just gone off the building probably hasn’t suffered enough structural damage to make using the elevator dangerous, and modern elevator wells are heavily reinforced. many large and high-trafficked buildings on my campus have fire rated elevators that link in with the fire alarm system so they won’t let you off on a floor with a possible fire. 

if the elevator isn’t working, wait in the stairwell and call the fire department to let them know where you are. modern stairwells are also heavily reinforced- it might not be pleasant but modern building code usually requires fire-resistant stairwell doors in office and big residential buildings, also to help firefighters get in and out safely. older buildings’ stairwells may or may not be retrofitted with fire-resistant doors but a stairwell is generally the safest place to wait if you can’t get out. 

what happened to your friend was horrible, and i’m very glad you were there to help her out, but you can absolutely use the elevator to evacuate if it’s not shut down. those don’t-use-the-elevator rules are for abled people.  

[tisfan]

This is GOOD TO KNOW. why do they not tell people this??

[ravynfyre]

Okay, firefighter here. If you are not physically able to use the stairs, and the elevator is NOT compromised, use the elevator. But you MUST be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that the elevator is NOT compromised before you get into it, because there is always the chance that once you get into it, you may not exit it. Power could go out. The elevator may actually BE compromised and you just couldn’t tell from where you were until you were in there, and it suddenly shuts down on you. Something else could happen. 

Understand that once you enter the elevator, you could POTENTIALLY be taking your life into your hands there.

It is NOT LIKELY, to be perfectly honest. It’s only in a pretty catastrophic scenario - think the Twin Towers, USA, on September 11th - that the elevators will be compromised and out of service. But there is a NOT ZERO PERCENT CHANCE and you need to understand that and accept it.

As for leaving the elevators free for the firefighters, okay, here’s the deal. Unless your nearest fire station is literally right next door? Your first on scene fire truck is NOT likely to be there on scene and needing that elevator before you get to the ground. It takes us TIME to find the address, gear up, and drive to the building. Then we need to hoof it into where the elevators even ARE, so YOU HAVE TIME to use the elevator to get down to the ground floor... BUT ONLY IF THERE’S NOT A RUSH ON THE ELEVATOR! And THAT is WHY we don’t tell people this shit. That’s WHY we tell people to NEVER USE THE ELEVATOR... because every self-entitled asshole will use it because they don’t feel like walking, and then put YOU in danger by delaying the elevator’s arrival to you.

IF, however, the elevator IS compromised, or you just can’t get it to come for you, or whatever, and you either don’t have anyone with you who has the adrenaline fueled BALLS to be able to toss you over their shoulder and hoof it down the stairs with you - because, let’s face it, that is RARE AS FUCK, then HERE IS WHAT YOU DO:

You call 911 and tell the call taker that you are in the building that has a fire alarm going off, and you are not able to evacuate because of a physical disability, and you tell them what floor you are on, and EXACTLY what stairwell you are waiting at. And the very FIRST thing that the firefighters are going to do once they arrive, if it is, indeed, a REAL emergency, and not a false alarm, is come get your ass and bring you down. Whether that means carrying you down the stairs, or whether that means locking out the elevators so that no one else can override them and coming to get you themselves, they WILL come get you FIRST THING if it is a real event. And if it is a false alarm? You will probably be the first person who is not involved with the building to know, because the call-taker is going to stay on the line with you until you are under someone’s care and out of danger, or until the scene has been sorted out as real or false, and you are out of danger that way.

These are pretty standard operations in the fire service throughout the United States. There may be some minor variations based on specific municipalities, but, for the most part, this is pretty typical: LIFE BEFORE PROPERTY. So, as long as SOMEONE knows where you are - hence why you call 911 - Firefighters will come get you. You are NOT alone, and you have NOT been abandoned. I PROMISE. It’s like, our whole reason for doing the shit we do: to save lives and to break shit. Sometimes, we get lucky enough to do both at the same time.

High rise fires suck ass, and I always hated them. But the very FIRST thing I asked anytime we got one was if we had “any entrapments” - which is what we call anyone who could not self-evacuate for ANY reason. We ain’t leaving you behind. And yes, your friend who doesn’t have the stamina to carry you down can stay with you, too. Because I would never ask that of someone, honestly. 

Also, just a little FYI... MOST fire alarms are false alarms. Not to make anyone complacent or anything, but, yeah. Most of them are either system malfunctions, someone accidentally hit a pull station, or someone burned popcorn in a break room. So don’t let a fire alarm freak you out until you need it to - by smelling or seeing smoke or flames. 

[gentle--riot]

i have had multiple nightmares about this very thing because NOBODY BOTHERS TO ACTUALLY TELL WHEELCHAIR USERS THIS STUFF

[downwiththebad]

I am loving these additions!

If you're disabled, this is worth the time and focusing energy to read through!!!

[kyraneko]

Short version:

If disabled and the fire alarm is just happened, you're allowed to take the elevators down but there's a small possibility you could get stuck if the elevators are compromised.

If you can't use the elevators or don't want that risk, go to the stairwell which is reinforced against fire, close the doors, and call 911 to let them know you are in that particular stairwell and can't get down.

Fire will strongly prioritize finding and rescuing people who might be still in the building during any actual structure fire. This is a major component of their job.

Fire people won't arrive in the course of one elevator run and actually half the deal with "don't use elevators" is supposed to be "leave it for people who need it in the emergency" which is both fire AND disabled people.

[fandomshatefatpeople]

Essential emergency information

[tidesandtwilight]

what is with the cop hate??

Oh sorry for the confusion. It’s because I hate cops

[fish-oracle]

tiny adaine doodle yaayyy