A complete sucker for Niko Oneshot @misterbrick42 - Tumblr Blog

Behold, my magnum opus

Worried my little brother wouldn’t like the Jax being transfem reveal but my worries were unfounded because his response to the finale was “she fumbled the clown AND the frog??”

#by clown did he mean Kaufmo or Pomni

americanoddysey

3. We'll be Right Back After These Messages! - Darkners After Dark (Pages 11-12)

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druckers

i would fuck him [remembers im talking about a real person] um [remembers its normal to be attracted to people] i would fuck him

glixbitch

Facebook: we analysed your entire internet history, tracked your location and took a deep dive into your personal relationships, and we’ve decided to recommend you this specific conditioner that you also saw in your local Tesco two days ago, aint that neat!

Tumblr: HEY sHITHEAD *slurring words* how would you like to buy *throws dart* a gym membership for your *spins wheel* pARROT

cloned-sheep97

i just get ads for weight loss pills </3

#fucking monopoly go. I truly don’t give a shit. thankfully some other companies were stupid enough to try to advertise here #so I have some variety in what I see for a split second before knowingly making an erroneous report

goldensunset

in small fandoms you need to be grateful to the person who only accidentally hit you twice with a frying pan while trying to make you breakfast. in big fandoms you can block people for wearing a shirt you don’t like

taptrial2

???????????????

snommelp

So, I’ve been pulled over a few times in my life. Not many, but a few. And I’ve also been in a couple of cars that got pulled over. And let me tell you, if you were actually doing something wrong, the officer doesn’t make any small talk, just straight into “I clocked you doing 70 in a 55.” The only time I’ve ever gotten the “do you know why I pulled you over?” was the time when I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and I got let go even though he insisted to the end that I was doing 87 in a 70 (white privilege at work).

“Do you know why I pulled you over?” is a trap. It means there’s a good chance the officer doesn’t actually have a good reason to ticket you, and is trying to get you to waive your 5th Amendment rights and incriminate yourself. If you make a guess, that’s a confession of guilt.

But there’s another trap, that I’ve heard of but haven’t yet experienced. It’s “do you know how fast you were going?” With that one, they’re hoping you’ll say no, because then they can name whatever speed they want – you just said you didn’t know how fast you were going, if you deny the speed they name then you’re lying to them.

themightytej

Oh, I’ve had that one. Go with “yes.” Don’t give them a number, just say “Yes.” Then they still have to offer a number and you can deny it without contradicting yourself. They could just ask you, at that point, but that’s suspiciously similar to saying they don’t know, and they tend to avoid doing that.

fattyatomicmutant-deactivated20

Reblog to save a life

suspiciouslysharklike-deactivat

if you scroll past this just because it doesn’t affect you personally, i see you.

dovewithscales

Also, you can always go to court and contest a ticket, and a lot of times you’ll win. Or if the cop thinks you’ll win they won’t even show up and you’ll win by default.

They like to target out of state plates because anyone who would be majorly inconvenienced by a court date two months away is a lot more likely to just pay it.