A totally healthy dose of simping, art, and writing!
Hello, welcome to my blog! My name is Kai and I have a totally healthy obsession with fictional characters. I write, I draw, and simp for various characters!
At this time, I do not draw or write NSFW, but I do like/reblog it so if you're a minor or your blog is ageless, please stay away!
The characters I mostly write about/for are these wonderful men above; Bucky Barnes (MCU), Robert "Bob" Reynolds (MCU), and Eddie Munson (Stranger Things)! I may write other characters sometimes, but my fics will mostly consist of these guys.
Any and all support is appreciated as I navigate my way through fandom spaces (again)!
Masterlists will be posted to @floofslibrary and I will also be using that blog to reblog any fic I post, so if you only want to see my fics, following that blog is a good idea!
If you want to follow me on other socials, please check out my Carrd!
The new Sentry series is about to start and I think we're not hyping his return enough! I have been excited like crazy since its announcement, especially because Paul Jenkins is writing Bob again and I'm ready to have my heartstrings pulled! I'm here for all the epic fights, introspection and emotional moments âšïžđ
I got the idea of this lil tribute while blasting some of my favourite 80s songs, and Gold by Spandau Ballet turned a lightswitch on in my brain đ€ so I took the lyrics and tried to turn it into a Golden-Age style cover, while keeping Bob's more modern design and promoting the new comic by Jenkins and Rosado at the same time đ€žââïž I must admit this is my favourite Sentry that I've drawn so far, and I was so happy with this artwork that I colored it twice for another cover-like illustration closer to my usual artstyle, stay tuned for it!
I am SO excited for the Golden Guardian of Good to be back and I hope this comic will be a success!!! đ„°
Please do not repost without credits! Reblogs and comments are welcomed đ
"I know I belong here, on Earth, but I long to be lifted up. / My heart does not rhyme the rhythm of my mind. / What is life worth living, if you can't dance to anything?
Night after night, oh I long to be alright."
- Aurora, To be Alright
Variant version of this illustration! I was so happy with the lineart that I felt like coloring in a more personal style and use it again, with a different vibe. I am SO excited for the new series and I'll never stop gushing about it hahaah meanwhile I hope you'll like this version of the artwork as well đ„°đđđâšïž
Please do not repost without credits! Reblogs and comments are welcomed đ
Pairing: Janitor!Bucky Barnes x Teacher!Female Reader
Summary: The school janitor stops by your classroom after the final bell of the day and you are smitten.
Word Count: Over 3.7k
Warnings: Light flirting, fluff, sweetness, longing, attraction, service dog, term of endearment (sweetheart), cold weather, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?)
A/N: In contrast to our Diamond in the Rough trailer park neighbor, let me introduce you to our Beneath the Surface soft-spoken janitor! â€ïž Beta read by the wonderful @mumbles411, but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @saradika-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
The final bell of the day rang, gently echoing in your classroom and the hallway. Your students jumped up with the kind of energy that only children seemed to possess. Chairs scraped the floor, kids scrambled for their backpacks, and their cheerful voices overlapped as they made their way to the door. It was a wonderful kind of chaos.
And you?
You just smiled.
Being new to the area and school, you worried about how the kids would take to you, but they were great and most of the parents were patient and understanding. You were lucky, as it made the transition much smoother than you anticipated.Â
You moved through the room like a calm center of gravity, making sure everyone had what they needed before they left for the day. âHave a good evening. And donât forget your projects for tomorrow!â
Moving to the doorway, you stood and watched as they filed out into the hall. It was your little ritual of care, making sure to give them smiles and little waves before they disappeared around the corner. You exhaled a warm, soft sigh once the last child was out of sight and leaned against the doorway. It wasnât out of annoyance or feeling overwhelmed, but a happy kind of tiredness that came from doing something you loved.Â
You walked back to your desk and settled into your chair, another sigh escaping. The room was peaceful and quiet now, the afternoon sunlight filtering in through the blinds. You pulled the small stack of papers toward you, hoping to get some grading done before you went home. But just as you grabbed your pen, there was a gentle knock on the doorframe.
And you lost your breath when you saw who was standing there.
âEverything good in here?â Bucky asked, his voice warm and low.
Bucky Barnes, the quiet janitor with the intense steel eyes that seemed to see everything. He stood there in his usual work shirt and pants that always stretched across his broad chest, shoulders, and thighs. His size and stare shouldâve intimidated you, but it didnât since he was polite to you from the start.
âYou ever need anything, just let me know.â
You smiled softly. You made it a point to always say hi when you passed by or saw him. He looked blindsided the first time you acknowledged him, like he was used to people ignoring him. But you noticed him. You heard him hum old tunes to himself when he mopped the floors at night and took note of how he fixed things, like light fixtures, before anyone needed to ask. And you had a feeling it was him that left a pack of your favorite pens on your desk after you lost one.
And while he didnât say much to you in the hallways outside of the polite âhelloâ in return or offering a soft smile, he always stopped by your classroom to check in. You appreciated that. He was a good man.
âYeah. Everythingâs fine,â you replied.
He leaned slightly against the frame, his toolbelt and key ring hung low on his hips, and tucked his hair behind his ear in an unhurried motion. His gaze drifted over the classroom, the warm colors and decorations, and then back to you, softer than before. You stared back because you couldnât help yourself. The beefy man with the soft smile made your heart skip a beat.
âLong day?â he asked, tilting his head and studying you like he already knew the answer.
âA good day,â you answered with a small smile. âA little tiring, but still good.âÂ
You werenât used to people noticing when you were tired.Â
He smiled faintly in return, like he understood days like that. âSaw your class rush down the hall like a mini stampede,â he said, nodding to the stack of papers. âThey giving you a run for your money?â he asked gently.
Your eyebrows shot up, the small talk surprising you. What was nice was the genuine tone and the look in his eyes. He wasnât just asking for the sake of asking. âThey are chaos and balls of energy in tiny shoes, but theyâre great.âÂ
You wouldnât have it any other way.
He huffed a small laugh. âThat they are,â he agreed, shifting his weight. âThey adore you, you know.â
Warmth spread across your cheeks. âI donât know about that, but thanks.âÂ
It meant a lot to hear that.
âItâs the truth,â he said, scratching the light stubble on his chin when a comfortable silence stretched. âYou sure you donât need anything? I could⊠help carry stuff to your car.â
Your gaze flickered to your bag. It wasnât heavy in the slightest. âI think I can manage,â you said out of habit, used to doing things on your own.
Buckyâs eyes flickered with disappointment, but he masked it quickly. It lasted only for a second, but your heart broke anyway because you caught it. You werenât trying to brush him off when he was only looking for a reason to linger. It was sweet. Flattering.
âBut,â you continued, his head lifting in what you guessed was anticipation. âIf you wouldnât mind walking me to my car when Iâm finished grading these papers, Iâd really appreciate it.â You gestured to the clock. âUnless youâre busy or have to go. I understand.â
You didnât want to intrude on his time.
He locked eyes with you and you caught his shock before his gaze softened. The faint tension in his jaw eased and he stood taller. It was the slow, warm smile that had your heart skipping a beat because you hadnât once seen him smile at anyone else in the building like that. It was a small gift with no wrapping or bow.
âYeah,â he said barely above a whisper. âI can do that.â
He stepped a little further into the room slow enough, like he wasnât sure if he was allowed and to give you the chance to tell him to go. His worn boots quietly padded across the floor when you didnât ask him to leave. He didnât crowd you, but he was close enough that you felt his steady presence and could smell the subtle clean aroma. It was nice.
The keys clinked when he hooked a thumb into one of the belt loops and you forced your eyes up. You refused to look at his thighs or hands, and you definitely didnât pay attention to the way the belt tugged at his hips. You were a teacher. You needed to maintain some professionalism.Â
But you were also a woman attracted to a very handsome man.
âYou sure you donât mind me being here?â he asked.Â
âI donât mind at all,â you promised, nodding to one of the bigger chairs. âAnd you can sit if you want. You donât have to stand guard.â
He quietly took a seat near your desk, still close without hovering, and you felt his eyes on you as you graded. You snuck a couple of glances at him, your cheeks hot when you noticed he hadnât looked away. Your grip tightened on your pen, but his observant stare didnât make you feel uneasy. His attention had butterflies fluttering in your stomach.Â
âYou, uhâŠâ He trailed off when you lifted your head, but his gaze wasnât on you anymore. It was on the corner of your desk instead where a few snow globes sat. âYou collect those?â he asked eventually, his voice soft like he was afraid the question might be invasive. Too personal.
âI have a few.â You picked one up with a smile and showed him. âOne of my best friends got me this one before I moved here.â
You gently shook it, the glitter inside swirling around the iridescent snowflake. Snow globes were always beautiful to you. They were mini worlds filled with magical stories, sometimes nostalgic, and always full of wonder.
His expression gentled more. âBeautiful,â he whispered, his eyes on you again.Â
You set it down carefully, your face warm. He said it so quietly you wondered if he meant the snow globe or you. âDo you like snow globes?â you asked, trying to keep your voice light and not give away how fast your heart raced.Â
You wondered who Bucky was outside of his job. Did he have hobbies or collect anything? Did he listen to music in his home or did he prefer the quiet?
The very curious part of you wondered what his love life was like. He didnât wear a wedding ring, but that didnât mean there wasnât someone special in his life. Your heart sank at the thought. If he did have someone special though, would he look at you the way he did? Or were you building something up in your mind for no reason at all?
He shrugged a shoulder and leaned back in the chair that still looked a bit too small for him. âNever had one, but I like them. Theyâre peaceful.â
âPeaceful. Thatâs a good way to put it,â you echoed gently, running a finger along the base of another snow globe. âThey make me happy, too.â
He hummed low. âItâs nice that you have things that make you happy,â he said, his tenderness almost disarming you. âYou deserve that.â
Your breath caught, the stack of unfinished papers forgotten. His sincerity framed itself in a way that felt intimate. âThank you,â you whispered, your stomach flipping.
His lips curled in a small smile before his brows pinched. âCan IâŠâ He absentmindedly ran a thumb along his belt. âI mean, if I ever saw a snow globe that reminded me of youâŠâ He rubbed the back of his neck next. âWould it be okay if I got it for you?â
Your heart stuttered. âYou⊠Youâd do that?âÂ
The soft-spoken man who cleaned up and fixed things without making a show of it wanted to get you something?
He nodded after a moment and shifted again. âYeah. If youâd want that,â he answered, his tone casual while his body language said otherwise. It was endearing.
You made sure he was looking in your eyes when you said, âIâd love that.â
The room seemed brighter, warmer, and he slowly exhaled as he relaxed in his seat. Seeing the relief in his frame tugged at something deep in your chest. You wondered if he realized he had just given you a small piece of his heart.
âOkay,â he murmured. âIâll keep an eye out then.â
You smiled and picked your pen up again. Neither of you said anything for a few minutes, the only sound being the quiet hum of the classroom lights and your pen moving across the papers. It was a comfortable kind of stillness.Â
âYou really donât⊠mind me being here?â he asked quietly when you got to the last sheet. It felt like he was asking about being in your presence versus your classroom.Â
âI really donât mind,â you promised, tucking the stack into your folder. âDo you think I would?âÂ
You hoped you didnât give that sort of impression.
He shook his head quickly before he lowered it. âNo, itâs justâŠâ His fingers curled on his thigh. âIâm just a janitor.â
If your heart couldâve physically broken, it wouldâve then and there. âYouâre not just anything,â you said before you could stop yourself.
His head snapped up, his eyes wide. âBut-â
You held up a hand to stop him and leaned forward on your desk. âBucky, I know we havenât known each other for too long, but you help everyone around here. You fix things before they break. You check on people even when no one notices. Youâre kind. You pay attention.â Your voice dropped to almost a whisper. âAnd you treat me with more gentleness than most people Iâve known.â
Color rose to his cheeks. He opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. âI donât⊠I donât want you to feel like you have to be nice to me.â
Whatever was left of your heart shattered into tiny pieces. âIâm not nice out of pity,â you said, shaking your head. âI like when you stop by. I look forward to it.â
He went still. âYou do?â he asked, his voice rough.
You gave him a small smile. âI do.â
His breath hitched a fraction, and it was enough for you to notice. When he looked at you again, it wasnât guarded or unsure. The softness was still visible, of course, but it was more open and a little overwhelmed. It was the kind of look that made your heart skip a beat.
âThank you,â he whispered, clearing his throat. âMeans more than you know.â
âAnd I know it was you who left me that pack of pens, so thank you.â
He chuckled, his cheeks deepening in color. âI, uh⊠Yeah, I did.â
You giggled, standing up to grab your coat and bag. âItâs my favorite brand. It was a nice surprise seeing them there.â
He got to his feet and carefully put the chair back where it was. âYeah, IâŠâ He looked anywhere but at you. âI may have heard you muttering under your breath that you couldnât believe you lost it. Figured a new pack might help.â
You bit your lip. He really did pay attention. âIt really did help,â you promised.Â
It made you whole day.
âIt was nothing.â He watched attentively as you slipped your coat on. âStill want me to walk you to your car?â
âIf youâre still willing.â
His lips twitched before a lopsided grin appeared on his face. âI am. Just need to grab my coat.â He hesitated in the doorway when he got there. âWould you mind if I brought Bear? I donât like leaving him in the building when I'm not inside.âÂ
You nodded. âOf course, you can.âÂ
You had seen the gentle giant of a service dog from time-to-time. The kids loved him. You werenât sure of the exact reasons Bucky had him, but it wasnât your business.Â
He nodded back in thanks and left while you locked up. You werenât even halfway down the hall when he came back in a worn coat with Bear beside him, and a giddy feeling filled you at the thought of him rushing back to see you. He scratched behind the dog's ear and your heart melted.
âHey, buddy,â he said, softer than he spoke even with you. âWeâre gonna walk her out, okay?â
Bearâs tail thumped once when he looked at you, a wag that felt like a welcome. You carefully crouched down to greet him. âAm I allowed to pet him?â you asked, knowing better than to assume.
âSure.â
You held your hand out so Bear could sniff it, letting him decide if he wanted you to pet him or not. He nudged it, allowing you to touch his thick fur. âHey. Youâre a good boy,â you whispered. He gave off calm energy. No wonder Bucky trusted him.
He glanced between you two, a mix of tenderness and shock. âHe likes you,â he said. âHeâs really gentle with kids, but he doesnât always warm up to adults right away.â
You smiled up at him. âWell, I consider it an honor then. Heâs very sweet.â
âYeah,â he said, his eyes lingering on you.
Bear nudged his hand, a subtle check-in. His fingers slid through his fur like second nature, and you saw the tiniest bit of tension leave his shoulders. âReady?â he asked when you stood up. He held his hand out and it took you a moment to realize he was wordlessly asking to carry your bag.
âYeah. Thanks.â Your fingers touched when you handed it over and you inhaled, wondering if he felt the jolt, too.
âYouâre welcome,â he said, his voice as comforting as the coat surrounding you.
You fell in step beside Bucky with Bear on his other side, your footsteps echoing gently on the polished floor. Buckyâs keys jingled every few steps, a small sound youâd come to associate with him. He walked with you instead of in front of or behind you, his pace matching you. He was close enough that you could hear the shift in his coat when he adjusted your bag on your shoulder.
âYou know, most people canât wait to get out of here at the end of the day, but you donât seem to mind staying a bit later,â he commented, sneaking a glance at you.Â
âThe quiet gives me a chance to decompress just a little before I head home,â you said, where there was more quiet since you lived alone. âYou donât seem to mind either.â
âKinda like you, I guess. Buildingâs quieter and it makes it easier to process my thoughts.â He pet Bear again and added after a beat, âI like the quiet.â
âI do, too,â you said, smiling. âIt balances out the wonderful chaos of the day.â
Before you could reach for the side door, Bucky stepped in front of you to open it. You smiled to yourself at the gesture. The crisp, cold air hit you immediately once you stepped outside and you took a moment to admire the soft blue sky. You shivered and felt guilty that he offered to walk you out in the cold, but it didnât seem to bother him.
âIâm right over here.â You pointed to a small car, one of the only ones left in the parking lot.Â
His boots crunched on some of the leftover salt and he put an arm at your lower back. âJust making sure you donât fall,â he said almost to himself instead of you.
âI appreciate that.âÂ
He cleared his throat and gently pulled Bear along when he sniffed the ground. âI meant to ask before, but what made you want to be a teacher?â
âOh.â He sounded genuinely curious. âMy answer might be cliche.â
âTry me,â he teased.
You got quiet, thinking back to your childhood. âIâve always loved learning growing up. I constantly had a book in my hand and I always asked questions about subjects that excited me.â
âAnd your teachers encouraged you, didnât they?â he guessed.
âThey did. They helped keep that passion of learning alive.â It meant a lot to you when you were a kid. âAnd I realized I wanted to do the same thing. I want kids to grow, learn, and thrive, even when my parents said there was no âreal moneyâ in teaching.â
He gazed at you in awe. âThatâs really admirable,â he whispered.Â
âThanks,â you whispered back, tilting your head. âHow did you become a janitor?â
He smiled wistfully. âIâll tell you when you arenât shivering,â he promised, lowering his arm once you got to your car and Bear taking a seat beside him. âIâll tell you about how I got him, too.â
You nodded and took your bag back, wishing you had an excuse to stick around. You wanted to hear his story if he was really willing to tell you. âThanks for walking with me,â you said, giving his dog a smile. âBoth of you.â
His nose nudged your hand again and Bucky smiled. âIâm glad you let us,â he said, shifting a bit on his feet like he didnât want you to go just yet either.
You fiddled with your keys to steel your nerves. âBucky?â
He looked at you expectantly. âYeah?â
You swallowed, feeling much warmer despite the chill in the air. âIâm really glad you stopped by my classroom tonight.â
âIâm glad I did, too,â he murmured.Â
You bit your lip and dug into your bag until you found a pen and a post-it note, using your car as a flat surface to quickly jot down your number. âHere. Just in case you ever want to chat or anything outside of school hours.â
You blamed the cold for your shaky hand when you handed it over. There was nothing in the rules that staff couldnât date, but you didnât want to put any pressure on him or make him uncomfortable. You already felt like you were prying by asking about his profession.
His mouth fell open when he read it, staring at it like it wasnât real. Did you make a mistake? Should you take it back?
âIâm sorry,â you said immediately. âYou donât have to call or anything. You could be seeing someone and I-â
âNo, Iâm not seeing anyone,â he cleared up right away. You sighed in relief, thankful that you didnât shoot your shot at a taken man. âIâm just⊠Shit, Iâm surprised you want me to have your number.â
âWell, I do.â Just like you wouldnât be nice to him just because, you wouldnât hand your number out either. âAnd Iâm not seeing anyone either,â you added, answering before he could ask.
He swallowed hard and carefully tucked it into his pocket. âIâll call you.â
âGreat.â Your smile lit up your face, and Bear looked between you two like a happy guardian. You were looking forward to it. âAnd if you stopped by again tomorrow, I wouldnât mind.â
He nodded, tucking his hair back with a smile of his own. âI will.â
Bear whined quietly. âYouâre allowed to stop by, too, Bear,â you assured him, giggling when his tail wagged.
âHe really does like you,â Bucky whispered. It seemed to mean a lot to him, and it meant a lot to you, too.Â
Your heart fluttered when he stepped back enough to let you open the door. âIâll see you tomorrow then, Bucky.â
âGood night, sweetheart,â he whispered, the endearment surprising you both. It sounded so natural coming from him. âSorry. ThatâŠâ
âNo, I⊠I like it,â you promised, putting your hand on his arm. You felt that jolt again and the hitch in his breath told you he felt it, too. âGood night, Bucky.â
He didnât walk away when you started the car, staying rooted to the spot with Bear faithfully beside him as you pulled away. He lifted a hand to wave, and you waved back, giggling softly to yourself. It was an unexpected turn of events, which thrilled you.
Because Bucky Barnes was going to change your life for the better.Â
I know, I know. Another Bucky. But isn't he the sweetest? How long before he calls? What's his story?
First art of the year, many more to come, and it is entirely self-indulgent. I think learning to love myself again will help me in my healing journey, and honestly, isn't self-shipping a sort of self-love? Bases by Skunkify on Payhip!Â
I haven't given up on fulfilling Flooftober (even though I'm months late, I am DETERMINED to finish it) but I've been dealing with something pretty big that's affected my life. But things are looking up, I'll eventually be okay.
I didn't write a whole lot but I did make the tiniest of progress on one of my drafts yesterday. A little is better than nothing and I hope everyone enjoys whatever I next publish.
Relationships: Eddie Munson x f!Reader, brief Dustin Henderson & Reader
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Eddieâs Death will never be canon to me, Self-image issues, scars, Hurt/Comfort, Flufftober 2025, Reader is Dustinâs older sister, smoking weed, anxiety, Reader doesnât partake, Eddie Munson is whipped, Eddie Munson is an endless flirt, Unrequited feelings, but not actually, Reader is in denial, roommates, pre-established friendship, Eddie Munson lives, in this house we hate the Duffers
Summary: The year is 1987 and Eddie Munson survived the events of the Upside Down. With the help of his uncle and several others, his name was cleared and he graduated the year prior. But now the anniversary of his near-death is here, his scars are cold and his body doesnât feel like his anymore.
Word Count: 7.6k (sweet Jesus, probably the longest I've written ever)
Warnings: angst and self-image issues, mentions of scars but not detailed, mentions of events that happened in Season 4 of Stranger Things, minor usage of weed, swearing, Eddie Munson himself
Author Notes: Before you read, I just wanna say that this would've been done a lot sooner if it weren't' for the fact that I moved to another state just as Flufftober began and I was also dealing with a bad breakup. All my Flufftober fics are going to be posted late and probably be posted past October too, sorry in advance >.< Not beta'd or proofread outside of whatever corrections Google Docs suggested.
Also, Iâm dedicating my very first Eddie fic to @thepinkpanther83, whose Eddie Munson/Reader fics got me through a pretty terrible living situation. Thank you pink for keeping Eddie alive and happy when the Duffers refused to đ„°
Also also, I made some dividers for this that I'll upload later as they're on my laptop and it's quite late at the time of me posting!
AO3 Link
Masterlist
March 27, 1987
A whole year. Thatâs how long itâs been since that badass, terrifying, yet fateful day when Eddie played Master of Puppets in Chrissyâs memory and nearly died in the Upside Down to demobats.Â
On that day as Nancy, Steve, and Robin had fought hard to defeat Vecna at Creel Manor, Eddie had dropped back down through the portal in the trailer to run out and distract the demobats, giving the others more time and a fighting chance to take down Vecna.
In order to do that though, he had cut down the makeshift rope to prevent you and your younger brother Dustin from chasing after him to stop him. You and Dustin both screamed after Eddie, calling after him to come back. The moments passed by and realizing he wasnât coming back, you looked to Dustin and started arguing with him; both scared over losing Eddie.
âWe should go after him! Heâs going to die if he goes out there alone!â You had snapped as panic rose in your chest, afraid of losing your favorite metalhead.
âHow? He cut the rope, sis, how do you propose we do that?!â Dustin snapped in return, eyes watering from his own fear.
âI DONâT KNOW!â You threw up your hands, exasperated and running out of options. âBut Eddie dying is out of the equation! He deserves to graduate after everything heâs been through and I am NOT going to let him die!â
Your little brother had then narrowed his eyes at you, like he just caught wind of something big.
âHoly shit. You like Eddie, donât you?â
You had opened your mouth to retort, to deny Dustinâs accusation but just then you both heard Eddieâs screams. You and Dustin worked together to make another makeshift rope out of Eddieâs shirts from his room, knowing heâd forgive you both later.
Dustin climbed up first and ran as fast as he could with his broken leg, being the first to lead the charge. The moment you heard Dustin calling for help from the safety of the trailer in the surface world, you scrambled up the shirt rope and stumbled when you landed on the other side of the portal but got up to your feet as fast as you could.
Eddie had been lying in Dustinâs arms, covered in blood and looking incredibly weak. Talking about it finally being his year and demanding Dustin take care of the Hellfire Club. You however disagreed. There was no way Eddie wasnât surviving and graduating after all the hard work he had done in his classes with your help.
Thanks to your help, you and Dustin had managed to drag Eddie back through the portal. As Eddie laid weakly in his bed, he coughed and wheezed, still being himself as he mused over the makeshift rope you two made.
â...Are those my shirts?â Eddie had asked as he looked up the rope, while you scrummaged around the trailer for a first aid kit or anything to help patch him up. Taking him to the hospital was a no go with the police still hunting him down. But thankfully you had experience with first aid in general from your years as a Girl Scout.Â
âYeah. Yes. They are. Eddie just.. Donât talk. Please, Eddie.â Dustin pleaded as he had held Eddie in his lap.
A bottle of alcohol, some old rags, and you had made your way back to Eddie and Dustin. Without speaking, you worked with Dustin to help remove Eddieâs jacket, vest and Hellfire Club shirt. But of course, Eddie being Eddie he had to make a comment.
âIf you wanted to see me shirtless, sweetheart, you coulda just asked.â He had teased, a wide grin split across his bloodied face.Â
You and Dustin looked at each other, your cheeks warming slightly before shaking your head. Trying to appear unamused at Eddieâs nonchalant flirting attempt, you had pulled out one of the rags from the pile and poured alcohol over it.
âVery smooth, Munson. On your deathbed and you still canât resist trying to flirt with any girl you can, huh? Even your tutor.â You had mused, wincing and grimacing whenever Eddie hissed from pain as you dabbed at his wounds.
***
Eddie survived that horrible event thanks to your help and Dustinâs, but not without scars. Your first aid skills back then saved him from bleeding to death, but not without any lingering signs of the Upside Down.
After the Party worked with Uncle Wayne to shift the blame to Victor Creel, Eddieâs name was cleared and he managed to make it through the final months of senior year and graduate. Now he works as a mechanic at a local car shop while he still hosts Dungeons and Dragons sessions at his own apartment, one he shared with you. Though even to this day, Eddie was oblivious to how you felt about him.
He took today off as he felt the scars around his body start to tingle. It felt suffocating and cold at the same time, like he was back there. Back in the Upside Down. He couldnât concentrate or focus worth a damn, so it wasnât really a good idea for him to be under cars where he could get hurt by accident while he was mentally elsewhere.
You were already gone for the day, working as a pet doctor at some local vet clinic. After what happened in the Upside Down and nearly losing Eddie, you still wanted to work in a medical field but felt like seeing people be injured or ill on a daily basis could trigger your trauma and PTSD; so working with animals seemed like a better alternative.
So Eddie was alone for the day, your room would be empty for several hours, and he didnât really feel like pretending to be okay around the other Party members or his bandmates. Instead, he figured some smoke was in order and maybe some strumming while he was lost in his high.
Rolling out of bed, Eddie groaned and popped his muscles, wincing when his scars ached with every movement.
âJesus H Christ, whereâs my roomie and her talented hands when I need her?âÂ
Eddie grinned to himself for a moment but then shook his head. There was no way you felt the same way about him, you never returned his affections or any attempts he made towards flirting with you. You always rolled your eyes, called him by his last name and seemed distant, like you wanted nothing more than things to stay platonic.
Which wouldâve been fine if not for the fact that Eddie had a massive crush on you that began the moment you agreed to tutor him on Dustinâs behalf. You were so kind and patient, even when Eddie seemed completely disinterested in the subjects he was struggling in. You never gave up on him, even when he was in a foul mood after being bullied by Jason Carver or when he couldnât (or wouldnât) focus on any assignments. You were a constant, and god Eddie Munson was whipped.Â
He shuffled over to his dresser and tore off the Hellfire Club shirt he fell asleep in. Last nightâs session went so long, he didnât get home until late in the night and ended up falling asleep in his clothes, which happened more often than not when it came to Eddie. If the man was tired, he wasnât gonna bother with changing his clothes. Since he was taking the day off, he opted for some comfy sweatpants instead of his usual denim jeans. Scouring around for a shirt, he realized most if not all of his clothes were dirty. Heâd have to do laundry later but for now just grabbed the nearest available graphic tee; which ended up being a Black Sabbath shirt you had gotten him when his other one was finally so faded the graphic was gone.Â
You didnât know much about heavy metal, didnât really listen to it or care for it, but you did care about Eddie and would often buy him new shirts of his favorite bands whenever they got so tattered and faded they werenât really wearable anymore. It all started when you had to replace the shirts that had been used for the makeshift rope a year ago. Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Megadeth, AC/DC, and so many more names you never even heard of that you quickly became familiar with when you had to get him new shirts.Â
Now that his outfit for the day was taken care of, Eddie walked back to his bed and opened the drawer in the night stand where he kept his personal stash.Â
âSpecial K, nope⊠Out of that, Iâll have to hit up Rick soon. What about⊠Do I have any Purple Dragon? HmmâŠ.â
He scoured the drawer, looking for that just right strain of weed heâd need for today. Especially today. Everything felt off and you werenât going to be home anytime soon to help him relax, whether it would be a casual back or shoulder massage, or helping him apply the numbing cream to his scars so they wouldnât itch.
âAha, here we go. Reefer Rickâs Special Greens. Okay, thatâs a mouthful. I should help Rick think of a better name or something.â
Eddie grabbed some rolling paper from the dresser and made his way out to the living room, Special Greens in hand with his only goal in mind to relax. Plopping down onto his spot on the couch, he immediately rolled a joint without hesitation. Once he was sure it was properly full, he grabbed his lighter from the coffee table and lit it, taking a few puffs.
If someone had asked him where he thought heâd be today, he didnât think heâd still be in Hawkins and he definitely didnât think heâd be rooming with Dustin Hendersonâs older sister. He was sure he wouldâve graduated with Chrissy, maybe pulled some strings to get Corroded Coffin a real audience and gone on tour around the country, to get the hell out of this cursed town.
But then that demon Vecna killed Chrissy and started a domino effect where he found himself being roped into the secret dimension that was hidden beneath the town of Hawkins. The younger members of the Party called it the Upside Down, Dustin specifically compared it to the Vale of Shadows from Dungeons & Dragons and after Eddie experienced the dimension first hand, he absolutely agreed. The Upside Down was dark and spooky, filled with weird floaty particles, the air feeling cold and damp everywhere you went, demonic bat creatures flying all over, it was Hawkins from another world entirely.
Thinking about the Upside Down made his scars tingle and burn, his mind filled with memories of back then. When he played Master of Puppets in memory of Chrissy to distract the demobats and give Robin, Nancy, and Steve the opportunity to attack Vecna. And how when he realized they needed more time, he saw an opportunity to be the hero he always wanted to be. He had ignored both yours and Dustinâs shouts to come back, to stay safe. But to Eddie, he didnât think heâd have a life to go back to if the others succeeded in slaying Vecna. The cops were still after him, thinking he was behind all the murders, and he was still flunking at least one class. There wasnât much left for him.
Well, that wasnât entirely true. There was still the band, Hellfire Club, and most of all - you. But if he was really being honest with himself, that was the real reason he had sacrificed himself. He didnât think he had a future, but you did and Eddie Munson would do anything to ensure that future. And then he thought about you some more, how you were on the verge of crying when you and Dustin pulled him back from the Upside Down and back to Uncle Wayneâs trailer. How dedicated you were to him when you tutored him before all the Vecna bullshit started. Back then heâd throw you a smirk or a grin, flirt with you to try to get under your skin, but you never caved in or gave up on him even when you shouldâve. You had just smiled and immediately got to work on helping him improve where he struggled. You were always there for Eddie.
A tingling cold sensation shook Eddie out of his thoughts and he immediately tried to pinpoint the source of it. He put his joint down on the coffee table in his smoke tray and started rubbing his hands up and down his arms, stopping when he felt the sensation grow stronger near the scars on his arms. It wasnât really all that surprising that they had healed weird and felt off even now, he did sustain injuries from an otherworldly plane. Usually getting high would float the feelings away. But something about today made them extra sensitive.Â
Maybe it was time to apply some of the numbing cream you had gotten for him to help with the sensations? You had mainly got the cream to help him be able to work or think without feeling like he was falling apart at the seams and he would be a liar if he admitted it didnât feel good when youâd take over to make sure he was applying it appropriately every time.Â
Letting out a soft groan, he got up from the couch and shuffled his way down the hallway leading to the shared bathroom and the two bedrooms. He began running a hand through his unruly hair as he made his way to the bathroom, hoping the cream would be right where you had left it last. Pushing the door to the shared bathroom open, he moved to stand in front of the bathroom mirror and took off his shirt in order to be able to access all his scars much easier.
But the moment his shirt was off, the momentary peaceful haze he was feeling shifted to something bitter. Due to the attacks from the demobats last year, almost all of his tattoos were ruined. The demonhead tat on the left side of his chest looked like someone took a nasty bite out of it and while the spider on his collarbone was safe, the same couldnât be said for the bats on his forearm or the wyvern. Even the puppet master tat on the inside of his arm had scratch wounds that had turned into scars.
Am I even the same Eddie anymore?
His thoughts wandered as he spiraled, eyes tracing each scar and broken tattoo. Under normal circumstances, he wouldâve gone back to the tattoo artist for a touch-up to fix them but with the scars in the way, it would be impossible.Â
âThis is⊠depressing as shit.â
He was so lost in his negative thoughts as he stared at his torso and scars that he hadnât heard the rattling of the front door that indicated you were finally home.
âEddie? I know youâre home! I went by Thacher Tire to pick you up and check on your van but they told me-âÂ
Your warm voice was a welcome distraction from the spiraling and Eddie took a slow deep breath before he called out to you, cutting off whatever you were about to say.
âIn here, Doc. In the bathroom.â
You placed your bag on the coffee table and took a few moments to empty the bags of groceries you had gotten on your way home. Knowing Eddie would want to do a full shopping trip with you later, you had just gotten the basics of eggs, butter, and milk. After putting the groceries away into the fridge, you closed the door and hung your bag on the back of one of the chairs then made your way down the hallway.
As soon as you rounded the corner to the bathroom doorway, you saw Eddieâs bare back from where he stood in front of the sink and mirror, and with the way he was staring at himself in the mirror, you could tell he was struggling with his body image again. Even if you automatically knew the answer for what was going on, you always asked.
âYou okay? Dave said you called off today because you werenât feeling well. I asked him about your van and he said that Sweetheartâs almost ready.â You spoke as you slid into the bathroom past Eddie. You took a seat on the plush toilet lid and looked over at Eddie, satisfied when you caught a small smile tugging on his lips at the fact you had intentionally said the wrong name for his car. It was a brief respite from the dark thoughts plaguing him.
âSweetheartâs my guitar, Babyâs my van. You should know this, weâve been roomies since graduation.â He corrected you gently as he looked over his shoulder at you from where you sat on the toilet.
You could see it in his body language and those pretty brown eyes. He was definitely not okay.Â
You watched his face fall as he turned back to look in the mirror again, his gaze tracing his scars and broken tattoos.
âI don't feel like myself anymore these days, Doc. Everything about me is cursed. Iâm not the same high school freak as I was a year ago. My tattoos?â He paused to gesture to his torso and chest, âThese used to be my pride and joy. Every single one has a story to them, but now? Theyâre broken and fucked up, just like I am. Nobodyâs gonna wanna look at them! Or me!â
You opened your mouth to protest, to say that he wasnât alone. After everything that happened with the Upside Down a year ago with the others, your life had been shifted and you felt you were much different than you were before too. But then he continued, his voice raising to match with his elevated emotions.
âEddie-â
âAs soon as I woke up today, my scars started to itch and⊠and burn⊠and I just feel like Iâm back there, you know? Am I actually alive? Sometimes when I go to bed, I dream Iâm still there, in that cold dark fucked up dimension, and Iâm being fucking eaten alive by those goddamn bats! I just⊠donât feel like myself sometimes. Whoever I am now is not the same Eddie Munson who ran the Cult of Vecna campaign for the Hellfire Club. I donât even recognize my own damn body, I truly am a freak, just like this damn town thinks I am. Iâm not worth shit, Iâve got too much going on to even be worth anybodyâs time. Iâm too much work-â
âEddie!â You cut his self-deprecating rambling by saying his name sharply and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. As soon as he was looking at you, you moved your hand up to his chin and held it ever so gently, like he was worth something.Â
âYou shouldâve called me at work as soon as you felt off, I wouldâve come home right away and helped you. You definitely shouldnât have been alone today.â You spoke softly, keeping one hand on his chin while you used the other to reach past him and open the bathroom mirror to grab the numbing cream.
âRight, and bother you while youâre doing important shit like saving peopleâs pets? Iâm fine, Doc, you gotta stop fussing over me.â Eddie scoffed, unbothered by you holding his chin. It wasnât like you hadnât done it before, you often had when you wanted him to really look at you and listen, or when you wanted to mess with him. By this point, it didnât phase him anymore. At one point, he mightâve felt butterflies in his stomach because of his crush but that eventually faded out when you seemed to not feel the same way.
You leveled an unamused stare at him as you let go of his chin to unscrew the cap for the numbing cream, then put the cap on the bathroom sink counter.
âAnd you gotta stop calling me Doc, Iâm not a doctor anymore. Iâm a veterinarian, thereâs a huge difference.â
Eddie rolled his eyes and let out a mildly amused huff, watching you as you applied some of the cream to your index finger. He continued to watch you as you carefully and gently applied it to the scar on his arm first, tackling his scratched up bat tattoo. Your fingers spread out the cream nice and evenly, lightly tracing the scar and his tattoo.
âWell, you do tend to me on a regular basis. So youâre still a doctor, just mine.â
You paused what you were doing with the cream on his ruined bat tattoo at Eddieâs words to look up at him with a skeptically raised eyebrow.Â
As soon as he saw the way you were looking at him, he realized how his words sounded. A soft blush tinted his cheeks and he cleared his throat.
âNot like that. Like⊠you take care of me. So youâre⊠yâknow, like my personal doctor.â Then under his breath and nearly inaudible, he added, âNot that I really deserve it.â
You leaned over and flicked his nose with the opposite index finger that wasnât being used for applying cream.Â
âStop that. If I thought you werenât worth it, I wouldnât be here.â You chided him softly, then immediately turned back to the task at hand by spreading some more cream on the scars on the upper portion of his arm where the Demobats had clawed and bit his arm like a chew toy.
Well, it was more like they had literally mutilated him, but comparing what they did to a dog gnawing on a chew toy made it significantly less dark and easier on the chest. Made it easier to focus on the fact that Eddie was still alive.
âI have dreams too, y'know." You murmured, using your thumb to gently spread the cream into a particularly gnarly bite scar on his bicep.
âHmm? About⊠the Upside Down?â Eddie asked softly, looking down at you as he continued to watch you focus on tending to his scars. Your touch was so gentle that it almost felt reverent, like he was worth something.
âYeah⊠It still haunts me. The fact we nearly lost you. But we didnât. Youâre here, Eddie.â You spoke quietly then lifted your head up to look at him. âYouâre here.â You repeated again, leaving your hand lingering on his arm. âYouâre alive. And yeah, youâre different. But that doesnât change how important you still are. Youâre right, youâre not the same Eddie Munson like you were a year ago. And Iâm not the same as I was a year ago either. Weâve both changed because of what happened, but that doesnât mean weâre any less than we were before.â
You turned his arm over to work on the demon puppet tattoo, but kept your eyes on him. You didnât need to look, you were familiar with his scars enough that you could tend to them without looking.
âYouâre not too much work, or too much anything, Eddie.â You spoke as your fingers worked on the demon puppet tattoo.Â
âIâm always too much.â He muttered, determined to once again argue with you. He did this far too much for your liking, but it was never enough to scare you away. You werenât that easily swayed.
âNot to me, you arenât. Never have been, never will. I didnât give up on you when I was tutoring you, I didnât give up on you in the Upside Down and I sure as hell am not giving up on you now, Eddie Munson.â You countered softly.
You gently grabbed him by his shoulders and angled him towards you so you could work on the other half of him, but as soon as he faced you completely, you heard him let out a soft, almost bitter sigh.
âBut why?â He asked in that typical self-deprecating tone. Why would you stick around someone like him? Heâs a drug dealer, a loud obnoxious metalhead who plays that âsatanic gameâ of Dungeons and Dragons, and isnât really going anywhere with his life. Not to mention heâs all fucked up from the Upside Down.
âWhy? Because I care.â You answered, squeezing some more cream onto your fingers again to focus on the scars on his chest and other arm.
Well, honestly? That was bullshit. You thought back to a year ago when your younger brother Dustin directly called you out on your feelings for Eddie. You werenât here for Eddie because you simply cared. You loved him, were in love with him. You just never voiced it because with everything going on within the past year, you thought that you and him both had enough on your plates.Â
âŠThat was bullshit too. You were just scared. Scared that you didnât have enough in common with Eddie for it to work out. You had only a passing interest in D&D and were very picky about what metal artists you listened to. And drugs? You couldnât really do that either. So to keep things platonic and to avoid heartbreak, you just shoved your feelings all the way down.
You were brought out of your thoughts when Eddie snapped his fingers and waved a hand in front of your face.
âHey, whereâd you go? Think I lost you there for a second.â
You blinked and lifted your head, realizing you had stopped applying the cream with your hand on Eddieâs chest above the broken demon head tattoo due to your mind wandering. You shook your head and resumed your task at hand, while also internally screaming like you always did whenever you got a chance to be close to Eddie like this.
âSorry, I was just thinking. Probably too much like I often do.â You spoke, only to be surprised when Eddie gently grabbed your wrist to get your attention.
âYouâre always telling me to get out of my head. You gotta do the same, sweetheart. Itâs a shame you canât smoke with me, or Iâd give you the best quality shit Iâve got on hand to ease that pretty head of yours.â
You let out a soft huff that turned into a quiet laugh, then you looked at Eddie with a grin.
âKettle calling the pot black.â You teased, pulling your hand out of his grasp to turn and wash your hands. As soon as your hands were thoroughly clean and dry, you grabbed the tube of numbing ointment and capped it, returning it to the medicine cabinet behind the bathroom mirror.
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â Eddie asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow and crossing his arms, which you promptly swatted as you turned around to face him. You didnât want him to smear the ointment away from his scars.
But this also brought you even closer to him. Very close. And you were immediately reminded that he was shirtless. Which wasnât an uncommon thing for him, whether it was because of tending to his scars or if he was feeling too warm. It was never really an issue between you two, mostly because you hid it well.Â
Except maybe this time not well enough.
âYou alright? Your face is awfully red. Almost as red as my favorite D20.â He teased with his signature grin, not really giving you a chance to answer his earlier question.
Which only made your suddenly warm cheeks only warmer.
âIâ Shut up. Youâre in my personal space, you nuisance.â You huffed and lightly shoved him in his chest where he wasnât scarred. âI said the kettle thing because you are just as bad as me, Eddie. Like today?â
Eddieâs grin faltered and he took a few steps back, raising his hands up defensively. Though it was clear in his âkicked puppyâ expression that your comment hurt more than you intended. You didnât intend any hurt, you were just calling him out on the hypocrisy. But the damage had been done and he let out a slow breath, running a hand through his long curly hair.
âYeah, well... In my defense, a year ago today I thought Iâd be dead. SoâŠâ
Now it was your turn to let out a slow breath. The blush that filled your cheeks mere moments ago quickly dwindled as you felt guilt wash over you. You inhaled slowly and then exhaled just as slowly, then gently put your hands on his shoulders. When he didnât look at you right away, you moved one hand to his chin and angled his face so he had no choice but to look at you.
âHey, come on. Eddie⊠Look at me, you know I didnât mean it like that. Why donât you go sort out some movies for tonight, pick some good ones so we can both get out of our heads, huh? Iâll take care of snacks.â You suggested, thinking a night spent watching movies and laughing your heads off would do you both some good.
***
By the time you got the popcorn all ready and separated into two bowls, Eddie had cleared the living room table of his drug paraphernalia and had picked out Ferris Buellerâs Day Off and Princess Bride. Ferris Bueller was one you introduced to Eddie because it reminded you of him. And Princess Bride was a recommendation from Robin, that you immediately loved as soon as you saw it. You were surprised to see it on the entertainment stand next to the TV, considering Eddie never really showed an interest in it before, but it was your favorite movie so you were grateful for his consideration.Â
As Eddie walked over to the TV and knelt down to pop Ferris Buellerâs Day Off into the VCR, you took your seat on the couch and put the two bowls down on the table. Grabbing a nearby blanket that Eddie had gotten for you since you loved getting comfy during movie nights, you tucked yourself into the couch and wrapped the blanket around yourself, the plush blanket being so big that there was still room for him to join you under it if he wanted to.
When he didnât join you right away, you watched as he stayed in front of the TV, still kneeling down and a small smile tugged at your lips as you realized he was waiting for it to rewind.
âYou forgot to rewind it again, didnât you?â
He glanced over his shoulder from where he was kneeling down and threw you a wide grin.
âWhat? Nah, I just thought itâd be more fun if I watched the movie right here. You know, itâs really comfy being on my knees on this cold wooden floor instead of joining you on the couch like usual. I can really enjoy the details of the movie from here.â
Just as he expected and hoped, his response earned him a roll of your eyes and an even wider smile. He loved seeing you smile, especially if it was caused by something he said or did.
âAlright smartass. Why donât you go get a shirt on and then come join me on the couch? Iâm sure the ointmentâs dried by now.â You quipped, reminding Eddie of his lack of shirt. He raised an eyebrow and looked down at his bare torso, then shrugged.Â
âIf itâs all the same to you, princess,â He said as he got up off the floor with an unceremonious groan, wiping his knees free of dust, âIâm quite comfortable without one.â
Right. Of course he was comfortable. Why wouldnât he be? This wasnât something out of the norm. Eddie was always comfortable around you.
He made his way over to the couch and plopped down on his spot on the couch opposite you, causing the leather to creak slightly from the impact. Once he was settled in, he grabbed the bunched up section of the blanket between you two on the couch and covered his lap. Since it was his movie, you handed him the remote to the VCR and leaned forward to grab your bowl of popcorn as the movie started playing.Â
It wasnât long before the sound of popcorn being munched could be heard between the sounds of the movie, the lighthearted tone causing some much needed laughter from you and Eddie both. Whatever darkness that had gripped his mind so tight earlier in the bathroom seemed to be slowly fading away to the levity of shared laughter at the antics of Ferris Bueller and his friends.
Near the end of the movie, you heard Eddie let out a derisive snort and you tilted your head to look over at him.
âMan, why didnât I ever come up with any of this?â He joked, stretching his long legs out to rest on the coffee table now that his bowl of popcorn was empty. You rolled your eyes and reached over to swat at his legs, always on his case about putting his feet on the table. But he simply grinned and lifted his leg away from your reach.
âBecause you and I both know that you hate being sick, so faking it would be out of the question. It wouldn't be believable. Besides, I doubt Wayne would fall for the kind of tricks Ferris pulled on his parents. Your uncle is much smarter than that.â You retorted playfully.
âYeah, okay. You might have a point.â He quipped, still grinning away like a cat that got the cream.
âJust admit I'm right, it'll be easier for both of us."Â
âNever. Where's the fun in that?" He fired back as he got up from the couch, making his way over to the TV to rewind Ferris Bueller before popping it out to put Princess Bride in.
âI'm surprised you picked Princess Bride as our second movie. I was under the impression it was too mushy-gushy for you.â You called out to him from your comfy spot on the couch.
âThatâs just outright incorrect, Angel. It's got adventure and fantasy elements, not just the romance shit. This has Eddie Munson-approved written alllll over it.âÂ
You raised a curious eyebrow at Eddie's new pet name for you, watching him as he moved from kneeling in front of the TV back to his spot on the couch.
âAngel? That's a new one, Eds, where'd that come from?â
He leaned forward towards the coffee table and grabbed the remote, turning to hand it to you with that cheeky smile on his face.
"Well, I can't call you Doc anymore, at your request, but you did save me. Like a guardian angel looking out for me. Soooo⊠Angel.â He explained, finally handing the remote over.
Huh. Well, you couldn't fault him. It did make sense logically. But something about the way he had said it felt different. Like it wasn't just him calling you by pet names like usual.
You hit the play button on the remote and watched out of the corner of your eye as he relaxed into the couch once more, a sense of contentment and relief washing over you to see that Eddie no longer had that haunted look on his face that he had earlier when you first came home.
As the movie played on, you found yourself getting more comfortable on the couch by leaning closer to your roommate, though if he noticed he didnât say anything. Oftentimes during movie nights, you had wondered what leaning into his side might feel like, if heâd run his fingers through your hair as your cheek laid against his chest while you listened to your heartbeat.
You were brought out of your warm thoughts as you heard Eddie quote Inigo Montoyaâs famous line in that well-known theatrical voice of his.
âMy name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!â
Letting out a gasp, you reached over and playfully hit his shoulder with the back of your hand.
âYou have that memorized?â
âCourse I do! I hear Robin quote it all the time to Steve at Family Video. Besides, I like paying attention to things you like.â Eddie spoke as he turned to look at you, still either oblivious or not caring for how much closer you were to him than you were before.
âYou should pay more attention to yourself then.â You immediately responded, mouth speaking faster than your brain.
Eddie blinked once, then twice, then a slow grin broke out on his face as he turned towards you. He put a hand on his chest and let out a very dramatic gasp in classic Eddie Munson fashion.
âYou like me? Iâm so flattered, Angel.â
Shit. You definitely didnât mean for that to come out.
âWait, hold on. Thatâs not what I- I didnât mean it like that.â You stammered, feeling your cheeks warm up immediately.
Without hesitation, he grabbed your hand and pulled you close, grinning from ear to ear. Youâre now pressed into his side, exactly like you were daydreaming about mere moments ago.
âSo youâre saying you donât? I think your rosy cheeks beg to differ.â
âEddie.â
âYeah?â
â...Shut up.â
âAs you wish.â
You were about to make a comment about the timing of him saying Westleyâs line at the same time as the movie when suddenly Eddieâs lips were on yours. The movie no longer had your attention and quickly became background noise.
But just as you were about to press back into the kiss, you were disappointed when he pulled away, a shit-eating grin full of mischief spread wide across his face as he looked at you.
Oh. Of course. Well, two could play that game. You werenât going to let him just get away with that.
Without hesitation you reached both of your hands forward and cupped his cheeks, then pulled him in for another kiss. You felt him chuckle against your lips a moment later and this time, it was your turn to pull away.
âI knew it. I knew you liked me.â He whispered as he looked into your eyes. He lifted one hand towards your face and gently cupped your jaw, lightly tracing your burning cheek with a thumb.
âI donât think the term like is adequate enough.â You murmured honestly, cheeks burning even hotter as you let slip just a tiny bit of your true feelings.
Eddieâs eyes widened and he brought his other hand up to your other cheek, holding your face oh so gently. Then a warm smile tugged at his lips as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against yours.
âI donât think like is adequate enough for me either, sweetheart.â
âEddieâŠâ
âIâve been crushing on you since the moment you refused to give up on me when you were tutoring me. But it stopped being a crush the moment you agreed to be my roommate. Itâs been so difficult not pulling you close for movie nights, I didnât want to overstep in case you didnât feel the same way.â He explained, tucking a loose strand of your hair behind your ear, tracing your ear with his fingers. âAnd every time you were standing so close to me and taking care of my scars, I was always so tempted to kiss you right then and there.â
âThatâs⊠Really funny. I was always denying my own feelings because I was afraid we didnât have enough in common for you to like me back. Seeing you shirtless drove me crazy, I was always tempted to kiss you or cuddle up to you. Youâre always so warm that I keep thinking cuddling you would be like cuddling a dragon.â You confessed, feeling butterflies in your chest as your cheeks warmed up even further. You were probably as red as a tomato by this point.
âA⊠dragon? Really?â Eddie deadpanned, though he couldnât resist a small grin. Only for it to falter as the rest of your words registered. âWait, what do you mean about not having enough in common, Angel?â
âJust⊠that Iâm not really into metal like you are, I canât partake in weed, and Iâm not super interested in D&D.â
âWell, if any of that was a problem, I wouldnât have asked you to be my roomie. Besides, you might be more into reading books and creating art instead of heavy metal, drugs, and D&D, but you know what? How many times did I go to you for art concepts for Corroded Coffin promo posters and ideas for campaigns based on the books you read? You may not be all that into Dungeons and Dragons or into metal music, but you inspire me anyways. I have my own creative streak, but you always take it to a higher level.â Eddie reassured you, continuing to caress your burning cheek with his thumb.
You pulled your head back enough to look at him, taking a moment to gaze into those warm brown eyes you had always previously struggled to not get lost in, in order to avoid staring too long. But now? With everything spilled and out in the open? You werenât going to hold back.
â...You wanna know why I agreed to be your roommate?â You whispered as you moved one hand over his hand on your cheek, lacing your fingers with his. Your hands and Eddieâs now making their way to the couch cushions between the two of you.
âUhh, because the market is absolute shit and you have to be like Loch Nora levels rich to afford a place by yourself?â Eddie retorted softly, causing you to roll your eyes and smile.
âWell, that too. But mainly⊠because after the events of the Upside Down, I knew you needed someone, just like I did. Youâre carrying the same darkness I am, Eds, just a different kind. You nearly died; of course you're going to have doubts about life and where you belong. The scars from those demon bats don't help either, and I know for a fact you hate your body. Between your earlier outburst and the way you were staring at yourself when I walked in? That wasn't the look of Eddie Munson being smug and proud of his tattoos like usual, that was the look of a man who didn't recognize himself anymore. But from where I stand? You're still my best friend and I love you. Whatever way you look or how you feel about your body doesnât change how I feel.â
Eddie blinked at you, taken aback and stunned by your supportive words. The fact that you felt the same way, that you agreed to be his roommate because you knew he needed you and you needed him burrowed its way deep into his bones. You loved him. He couldnât believe it.
Which is exactly why he had an inkling of self-doubt creep in from the back of his mind like a parasite.
â⊠Angel, you must be some kinda freak if you love me with how scarred and fucked up I am after the Upside Down shit.â
You stared at him, really stared. Was he being serious right now? You would go to the Upside Down and back a million times over if it meant proving just how much he meant to you.
âIf I had a problem with how scarred and fucked up you are, I wouldnât have gotten you that numbing cream and I wouldnât help you get it applied properly when you need me to. Besides, just because mine arenât physical doesnât mean I donât have scars from the Upside Down either. I meant what I said Eddie. I. Love. You.â
You reinforced your feelings by pressing a kiss to his forehead, cheek, and then a quick kiss on his lips after each of those last three words.
Eddie didnât smirk, grin, or make one of his snarky comments. Not even a joke slipped from his mouth as he stared at you.Â
Oh he was definitely whipped for you.
âYou know, sweetheart⊠Iâm not entirely incompetent when it comes to applying that ointment⊠I just prefer it when you do it. Youâre always so gentle with me. And so warm. I felt so cold earlier, when it was just me and my scars. Then you got home and you touched me like I was something precious.â He spoke softly, soft chocolate brown eyes gazing into yours.
âYou are something precious. Youâre precious to me, Eddie. Scars and all.â
There you went again, turning his life upside down (no pun intended). Saying such sweet and soft words to him like it was the easiest thing for you to do.Â
He snorted, but it was lacking any real humor or laughter.
âYou really are a freak. But youâre my freak. And us freaks gotta stick together. Câmere, angel.â
Eddie then pulled you over to his side of the couch and moved his legs so that you could sit comfortably between them, with your back to his chest. As soon as he was sure you were settled, he wrapped his arms around your waist and laid his chin on top of your head, letting out a slow breath to relax into the intimacy of the moment of finally having you in his arms.Â
As you relaxed, you laid your arms across his and felt⊠peaceful. The movie had gone on in the background so long by this point that credits were rolling. But you didnât care about it, honestly you stopped paying attention awhile ago.Â
The only story you cared about now was the one between you and Eddie Munson. And whatever the journey ahead held for you both, you would do it together.
Relationships: Eddie Munson x f!Reader, brief Dustin Henderson & Reader
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Eddieâs Death will never be canon to me, Self-image issues, scars, Hurt/Comfort, Flufftober 2025, Reader is Dustinâs older sister, smoking weed, anxiety, Reader doesnât partake, Eddie Munson is whipped, Eddie Munson is an endless flirt, Unrequited feelings, but not actually, Reader is in denial, roommates, pre-established friendship, Eddie Munson lives, in this house we hate the Duffers
Summary: The year is 1987 and Eddie Munson survived the events of the Upside Down. With the help of his uncle and several others, his name was cleared and he graduated the year prior. But now the anniversary of his near-death is here, his scars are cold and his body doesnât feel like his anymore.
Word Count: 7.6k (sweet Jesus, probably the longest I've written ever)
Warnings: angst and self-image issues, mentions of scars but not detailed, mentions of events that happened in Season 4 of Stranger Things, minor usage of weed, swearing, Eddie Munson himself
Author Notes: Before you read, I just wanna say that this would've been done a lot sooner if it weren't' for the fact that I moved to another state just as Flufftober began and I was also dealing with a bad breakup. All my Flufftober fics are going to be posted late and probably be posted past October too, sorry in advance >.< Not beta'd or proofread outside of whatever corrections Google Docs suggested.
Also, Iâm dedicating my very first Eddie fic to @thepinkpanther83, whose Eddie Munson/Reader fics got me through a pretty terrible living situation. Thank you pink for keeping Eddie alive and happy when the Duffers refused to đ„°
Also also, I made some dividers for this that I'll upload later as they're on my laptop and it's quite late at the time of me posting!
AO3 Link
Masterlist
March 27, 1987
A whole year. Thatâs how long itâs been since that badass, terrifying, yet fateful day when Eddie played Master of Puppets in Chrissyâs memory and nearly died in the Upside Down to demobats.Â
On that day as Nancy, Steve, and Robin had fought hard to defeat Vecna at Creel Manor, Eddie had dropped back down through the portal in the trailer to run out and distract the demobats, giving the others more time and a fighting chance to take down Vecna.
In order to do that though, he had cut down the makeshift rope to prevent you and your younger brother Dustin from chasing after him to stop him. You and Dustin both screamed after Eddie, calling after him to come back. The moments passed by and realizing he wasnât coming back, you looked to Dustin and started arguing with him; both scared over losing Eddie.
âWe should go after him! Heâs going to die if he goes out there alone!â You had snapped as panic rose in your chest, afraid of losing your favorite metalhead.
âHow? He cut the rope, sis, how do you propose we do that?!â Dustin snapped in return, eyes watering from his own fear.
âI DONâT KNOW!â You threw up your hands, exasperated and running out of options. âBut Eddie dying is out of the equation! He deserves to graduate after everything heâs been through and I am NOT going to let him die!â
Your little brother had then narrowed his eyes at you, like he just caught wind of something big.
âHoly shit. You like Eddie, donât you?â
You had opened your mouth to retort, to deny Dustinâs accusation but just then you both heard Eddieâs screams. You and Dustin worked together to make another makeshift rope out of Eddieâs shirts from his room, knowing heâd forgive you both later.
Dustin climbed up first and ran as fast as he could with his broken leg, being the first to lead the charge. The moment you heard Dustin calling for help from the safety of the trailer in the surface world, you scrambled up the shirt rope and stumbled when you landed on the other side of the portal but got up to your feet as fast as you could.
Eddie had been lying in Dustinâs arms, covered in blood and looking incredibly weak. Talking about it finally being his year and demanding Dustin take care of the Hellfire Club. You however disagreed. There was no way Eddie wasnât surviving and graduating after all the hard work he had done in his classes with your help.
Thanks to your help, you and Dustin had managed to drag Eddie back through the portal. As Eddie laid weakly in his bed, he coughed and wheezed, still being himself as he mused over the makeshift rope you two made.
â...Are those my shirts?â Eddie had asked as he looked up the rope, while you scrummaged around the trailer for a first aid kit or anything to help patch him up. Taking him to the hospital was a no go with the police still hunting him down. But thankfully you had experience with first aid in general from your years as a Girl Scout.Â
âYeah. Yes. They are. Eddie just.. Donât talk. Please, Eddie.â Dustin pleaded as he had held Eddie in his lap.
A bottle of alcohol, some old rags, and you had made your way back to Eddie and Dustin. Without speaking, you worked with Dustin to help remove Eddieâs jacket, vest and Hellfire Club shirt. But of course, Eddie being Eddie he had to make a comment.
âIf you wanted to see me shirtless, sweetheart, you coulda just asked.â He had teased, a wide grin split across his bloodied face.Â
You and Dustin looked at each other, your cheeks warming slightly before shaking your head. Trying to appear unamused at Eddieâs nonchalant flirting attempt, you had pulled out one of the rags from the pile and poured alcohol over it.
âVery smooth, Munson. On your deathbed and you still canât resist trying to flirt with any girl you can, huh? Even your tutor.â You had mused, wincing and grimacing whenever Eddie hissed from pain as you dabbed at his wounds.
***
Eddie survived that horrible event thanks to your help and Dustinâs, but not without scars. Your first aid skills back then saved him from bleeding to death, but not without any lingering signs of the Upside Down.
After the Party worked with Uncle Wayne to shift the blame to Victor Creel, Eddieâs name was cleared and he managed to make it through the final months of senior year and graduate. Now he works as a mechanic at a local car shop while he still hosts Dungeons and Dragons sessions at his own apartment, one he shared with you. Though even to this day, Eddie was oblivious to how you felt about him.
He took today off as he felt the scars around his body start to tingle. It felt suffocating and cold at the same time, like he was back there. Back in the Upside Down. He couldnât concentrate or focus worth a damn, so it wasnât really a good idea for him to be under cars where he could get hurt by accident while he was mentally elsewhere.
You were already gone for the day, working as a pet doctor at some local vet clinic. After what happened in the Upside Down and nearly losing Eddie, you still wanted to work in a medical field but felt like seeing people be injured or ill on a daily basis could trigger your trauma and PTSD; so working with animals seemed like a better alternative.
So Eddie was alone for the day, your room would be empty for several hours, and he didnât really feel like pretending to be okay around the other Party members or his bandmates. Instead, he figured some smoke was in order and maybe some strumming while he was lost in his high.
Rolling out of bed, Eddie groaned and popped his muscles, wincing when his scars ached with every movement.
âJesus H Christ, whereâs my roomie and her talented hands when I need her?âÂ
Eddie grinned to himself for a moment but then shook his head. There was no way you felt the same way about him, you never returned his affections or any attempts he made towards flirting with you. You always rolled your eyes, called him by his last name and seemed distant, like you wanted nothing more than things to stay platonic.
Which wouldâve been fine if not for the fact that Eddie had a massive crush on you that began the moment you agreed to tutor him on Dustinâs behalf. You were so kind and patient, even when Eddie seemed completely disinterested in the subjects he was struggling in. You never gave up on him, even when he was in a foul mood after being bullied by Jason Carver or when he couldnât (or wouldnât) focus on any assignments. You were a constant, and god Eddie Munson was whipped.Â
He shuffled over to his dresser and tore off the Hellfire Club shirt he fell asleep in. Last nightâs session went so long, he didnât get home until late in the night and ended up falling asleep in his clothes, which happened more often than not when it came to Eddie. If the man was tired, he wasnât gonna bother with changing his clothes. Since he was taking the day off, he opted for some comfy sweatpants instead of his usual denim jeans. Scouring around for a shirt, he realized most if not all of his clothes were dirty. Heâd have to do laundry later but for now just grabbed the nearest available graphic tee; which ended up being a Black Sabbath shirt you had gotten him when his other one was finally so faded the graphic was gone.Â
You didnât know much about heavy metal, didnât really listen to it or care for it, but you did care about Eddie and would often buy him new shirts of his favorite bands whenever they got so tattered and faded they werenât really wearable anymore. It all started when you had to replace the shirts that had been used for the makeshift rope a year ago. Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Megadeth, AC/DC, and so many more names you never even heard of that you quickly became familiar with when you had to get him new shirts.Â
Now that his outfit for the day was taken care of, Eddie walked back to his bed and opened the drawer in the night stand where he kept his personal stash.Â
âSpecial K, nope⊠Out of that, Iâll have to hit up Rick soon. What about⊠Do I have any Purple Dragon? HmmâŠ.â
He scoured the drawer, looking for that just right strain of weed heâd need for today. Especially today. Everything felt off and you werenât going to be home anytime soon to help him relax, whether it would be a casual back or shoulder massage, or helping him apply the numbing cream to his scars so they wouldnât itch.
âAha, here we go. Reefer Rickâs Special Greens. Okay, thatâs a mouthful. I should help Rick think of a better name or something.â
Eddie grabbed some rolling paper from the dresser and made his way out to the living room, Special Greens in hand with his only goal in mind to relax. Plopping down onto his spot on the couch, he immediately rolled a joint without hesitation. Once he was sure it was properly full, he grabbed his lighter from the coffee table and lit it, taking a few puffs.
If someone had asked him where he thought heâd be today, he didnât think heâd still be in Hawkins and he definitely didnât think heâd be rooming with Dustin Hendersonâs older sister. He was sure he wouldâve graduated with Chrissy, maybe pulled some strings to get Corroded Coffin a real audience and gone on tour around the country, to get the hell out of this cursed town.
But then that demon Vecna killed Chrissy and started a domino effect where he found himself being roped into the secret dimension that was hidden beneath the town of Hawkins. The younger members of the Party called it the Upside Down, Dustin specifically compared it to the Vale of Shadows from Dungeons & Dragons and after Eddie experienced the dimension first hand, he absolutely agreed. The Upside Down was dark and spooky, filled with weird floaty particles, the air feeling cold and damp everywhere you went, demonic bat creatures flying all over, it was Hawkins from another world entirely.
Thinking about the Upside Down made his scars tingle and burn, his mind filled with memories of back then. When he played Master of Puppets in memory of Chrissy to distract the demobats and give Robin, Nancy, and Steve the opportunity to attack Vecna. And how when he realized they needed more time, he saw an opportunity to be the hero he always wanted to be. He had ignored both yours and Dustinâs shouts to come back, to stay safe. But to Eddie, he didnât think heâd have a life to go back to if the others succeeded in slaying Vecna. The cops were still after him, thinking he was behind all the murders, and he was still flunking at least one class. There wasnât much left for him.
Well, that wasnât entirely true. There was still the band, Hellfire Club, and most of all - you. But if he was really being honest with himself, that was the real reason he had sacrificed himself. He didnât think he had a future, but you did and Eddie Munson would do anything to ensure that future. And then he thought about you some more, how you were on the verge of crying when you and Dustin pulled him back from the Upside Down and back to Uncle Wayneâs trailer. How dedicated you were to him when you tutored him before all the Vecna bullshit started. Back then heâd throw you a smirk or a grin, flirt with you to try to get under your skin, but you never caved in or gave up on him even when you shouldâve. You had just smiled and immediately got to work on helping him improve where he struggled. You were always there for Eddie.
A tingling cold sensation shook Eddie out of his thoughts and he immediately tried to pinpoint the source of it. He put his joint down on the coffee table in his smoke tray and started rubbing his hands up and down his arms, stopping when he felt the sensation grow stronger near the scars on his arms. It wasnât really all that surprising that they had healed weird and felt off even now, he did sustain injuries from an otherworldly plane. Usually getting high would float the feelings away. But something about today made them extra sensitive.Â
Maybe it was time to apply some of the numbing cream you had gotten for him to help with the sensations? You had mainly got the cream to help him be able to work or think without feeling like he was falling apart at the seams and he would be a liar if he admitted it didnât feel good when youâd take over to make sure he was applying it appropriately every time.Â
Letting out a soft groan, he got up from the couch and shuffled his way down the hallway leading to the shared bathroom and the two bedrooms. He began running a hand through his unruly hair as he made his way to the bathroom, hoping the cream would be right where you had left it last. Pushing the door to the shared bathroom open, he moved to stand in front of the bathroom mirror and took off his shirt in order to be able to access all his scars much easier.
But the moment his shirt was off, the momentary peaceful haze he was feeling shifted to something bitter. Due to the attacks from the demobats last year, almost all of his tattoos were ruined. The demonhead tat on the left side of his chest looked like someone took a nasty bite out of it and while the spider on his collarbone was safe, the same couldnât be said for the bats on his forearm or the wyvern. Even the puppet master tat on the inside of his arm had scratch wounds that had turned into scars.
Am I even the same Eddie anymore?
His thoughts wandered as he spiraled, eyes tracing each scar and broken tattoo. Under normal circumstances, he wouldâve gone back to the tattoo artist for a touch-up to fix them but with the scars in the way, it would be impossible.Â
âThis is⊠depressing as shit.â
He was so lost in his negative thoughts as he stared at his torso and scars that he hadnât heard the rattling of the front door that indicated you were finally home.
âEddie? I know youâre home! I went by Thacher Tire to pick you up and check on your van but they told me-âÂ
Your warm voice was a welcome distraction from the spiraling and Eddie took a slow deep breath before he called out to you, cutting off whatever you were about to say.
âIn here, Doc. In the bathroom.â
You placed your bag on the coffee table and took a few moments to empty the bags of groceries you had gotten on your way home. Knowing Eddie would want to do a full shopping trip with you later, you had just gotten the basics of eggs, butter, and milk. After putting the groceries away into the fridge, you closed the door and hung your bag on the back of one of the chairs then made your way down the hallway.
As soon as you rounded the corner to the bathroom doorway, you saw Eddieâs bare back from where he stood in front of the sink and mirror, and with the way he was staring at himself in the mirror, you could tell he was struggling with his body image again. Even if you automatically knew the answer for what was going on, you always asked.
âYou okay? Dave said you called off today because you werenât feeling well. I asked him about your van and he said that Sweetheartâs almost ready.â You spoke as you slid into the bathroom past Eddie. You took a seat on the plush toilet lid and looked over at Eddie, satisfied when you caught a small smile tugging on his lips at the fact you had intentionally said the wrong name for his car. It was a brief respite from the dark thoughts plaguing him.
âSweetheartâs my guitar, Babyâs my van. You should know this, weâve been roomies since graduation.â He corrected you gently as he looked over his shoulder at you from where you sat on the toilet.
You could see it in his body language and those pretty brown eyes. He was definitely not okay.Â
You watched his face fall as he turned back to look in the mirror again, his gaze tracing his scars and broken tattoos.
âI don't feel like myself anymore these days, Doc. Everything about me is cursed. Iâm not the same high school freak as I was a year ago. My tattoos?â He paused to gesture to his torso and chest, âThese used to be my pride and joy. Every single one has a story to them, but now? Theyâre broken and fucked up, just like I am. Nobodyâs gonna wanna look at them! Or me!â
You opened your mouth to protest, to say that he wasnât alone. After everything that happened with the Upside Down a year ago with the others, your life had been shifted and you felt you were much different than you were before too. But then he continued, his voice raising to match with his elevated emotions.
âEddie-â
âAs soon as I woke up today, my scars started to itch and⊠and burn⊠and I just feel like Iâm back there, you know? Am I actually alive? Sometimes when I go to bed, I dream Iâm still there, in that cold dark fucked up dimension, and Iâm being fucking eaten alive by those goddamn bats! I just⊠donât feel like myself sometimes. Whoever I am now is not the same Eddie Munson who ran the Cult of Vecna campaign for the Hellfire Club. I donât even recognize my own damn body, I truly am a freak, just like this damn town thinks I am. Iâm not worth shit, Iâve got too much going on to even be worth anybodyâs time. Iâm too much work-â
âEddie!â You cut his self-deprecating rambling by saying his name sharply and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. As soon as he was looking at you, you moved your hand up to his chin and held it ever so gently, like he was worth something.Â
âYou shouldâve called me at work as soon as you felt off, I wouldâve come home right away and helped you. You definitely shouldnât have been alone today.â You spoke softly, keeping one hand on his chin while you used the other to reach past him and open the bathroom mirror to grab the numbing cream.
âRight, and bother you while youâre doing important shit like saving peopleâs pets? Iâm fine, Doc, you gotta stop fussing over me.â Eddie scoffed, unbothered by you holding his chin. It wasnât like you hadnât done it before, you often had when you wanted him to really look at you and listen, or when you wanted to mess with him. By this point, it didnât phase him anymore. At one point, he mightâve felt butterflies in his stomach because of his crush but that eventually faded out when you seemed to not feel the same way.
You leveled an unamused stare at him as you let go of his chin to unscrew the cap for the numbing cream, then put the cap on the bathroom sink counter.
âAnd you gotta stop calling me Doc, Iâm not a doctor anymore. Iâm a veterinarian, thereâs a huge difference.â
Eddie rolled his eyes and let out a mildly amused huff, watching you as you applied some of the cream to your index finger. He continued to watch you as you carefully and gently applied it to the scar on his arm first, tackling his scratched up bat tattoo. Your fingers spread out the cream nice and evenly, lightly tracing the scar and his tattoo.
âWell, you do tend to me on a regular basis. So youâre still a doctor, just mine.â
You paused what you were doing with the cream on his ruined bat tattoo at Eddieâs words to look up at him with a skeptically raised eyebrow.Â
As soon as he saw the way you were looking at him, he realized how his words sounded. A soft blush tinted his cheeks and he cleared his throat.
âNot like that. Like⊠you take care of me. So youâre⊠yâknow, like my personal doctor.â Then under his breath and nearly inaudible, he added, âNot that I really deserve it.â
You leaned over and flicked his nose with the opposite index finger that wasnât being used for applying cream.Â
âStop that. If I thought you werenât worth it, I wouldnât be here.â You chided him softly, then immediately turned back to the task at hand by spreading some more cream on the scars on the upper portion of his arm where the Demobats had clawed and bit his arm like a chew toy.
Well, it was more like they had literally mutilated him, but comparing what they did to a dog gnawing on a chew toy made it significantly less dark and easier on the chest. Made it easier to focus on the fact that Eddie was still alive.
âI have dreams too, y'know." You murmured, using your thumb to gently spread the cream into a particularly gnarly bite scar on his bicep.
âHmm? About⊠the Upside Down?â Eddie asked softly, looking down at you as he continued to watch you focus on tending to his scars. Your touch was so gentle that it almost felt reverent, like he was worth something.
âYeah⊠It still haunts me. The fact we nearly lost you. But we didnât. Youâre here, Eddie.â You spoke quietly then lifted your head up to look at him. âYouâre here.â You repeated again, leaving your hand lingering on his arm. âYouâre alive. And yeah, youâre different. But that doesnât change how important you still are. Youâre right, youâre not the same Eddie Munson like you were a year ago. And Iâm not the same as I was a year ago either. Weâve both changed because of what happened, but that doesnât mean weâre any less than we were before.â
You turned his arm over to work on the demon puppet tattoo, but kept your eyes on him. You didnât need to look, you were familiar with his scars enough that you could tend to them without looking.
âYouâre not too much work, or too much anything, Eddie.â You spoke as your fingers worked on the demon puppet tattoo.Â
âIâm always too much.â He muttered, determined to once again argue with you. He did this far too much for your liking, but it was never enough to scare you away. You werenât that easily swayed.
âNot to me, you arenât. Never have been, never will. I didnât give up on you when I was tutoring you, I didnât give up on you in the Upside Down and I sure as hell am not giving up on you now, Eddie Munson.â You countered softly.
You gently grabbed him by his shoulders and angled him towards you so you could work on the other half of him, but as soon as he faced you completely, you heard him let out a soft, almost bitter sigh.
âBut why?â He asked in that typical self-deprecating tone. Why would you stick around someone like him? Heâs a drug dealer, a loud obnoxious metalhead who plays that âsatanic gameâ of Dungeons and Dragons, and isnât really going anywhere with his life. Not to mention heâs all fucked up from the Upside Down.
âWhy? Because I care.â You answered, squeezing some more cream onto your fingers again to focus on the scars on his chest and other arm.
Well, honestly? That was bullshit. You thought back to a year ago when your younger brother Dustin directly called you out on your feelings for Eddie. You werenât here for Eddie because you simply cared. You loved him, were in love with him. You just never voiced it because with everything going on within the past year, you thought that you and him both had enough on your plates.Â
âŠThat was bullshit too. You were just scared. Scared that you didnât have enough in common with Eddie for it to work out. You had only a passing interest in D&D and were very picky about what metal artists you listened to. And drugs? You couldnât really do that either. So to keep things platonic and to avoid heartbreak, you just shoved your feelings all the way down.
You were brought out of your thoughts when Eddie snapped his fingers and waved a hand in front of your face.
âHey, whereâd you go? Think I lost you there for a second.â
You blinked and lifted your head, realizing you had stopped applying the cream with your hand on Eddieâs chest above the broken demon head tattoo due to your mind wandering. You shook your head and resumed your task at hand, while also internally screaming like you always did whenever you got a chance to be close to Eddie like this.
âSorry, I was just thinking. Probably too much like I often do.â You spoke, only to be surprised when Eddie gently grabbed your wrist to get your attention.
âYouâre always telling me to get out of my head. You gotta do the same, sweetheart. Itâs a shame you canât smoke with me, or Iâd give you the best quality shit Iâve got on hand to ease that pretty head of yours.â
You let out a soft huff that turned into a quiet laugh, then you looked at Eddie with a grin.
âKettle calling the pot black.â You teased, pulling your hand out of his grasp to turn and wash your hands. As soon as your hands were thoroughly clean and dry, you grabbed the tube of numbing ointment and capped it, returning it to the medicine cabinet behind the bathroom mirror.
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â Eddie asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow and crossing his arms, which you promptly swatted as you turned around to face him. You didnât want him to smear the ointment away from his scars.
But this also brought you even closer to him. Very close. And you were immediately reminded that he was shirtless. Which wasnât an uncommon thing for him, whether it was because of tending to his scars or if he was feeling too warm. It was never really an issue between you two, mostly because you hid it well.Â
Except maybe this time not well enough.
âYou alright? Your face is awfully red. Almost as red as my favorite D20.â He teased with his signature grin, not really giving you a chance to answer his earlier question.
Which only made your suddenly warm cheeks only warmer.
âIâ Shut up. Youâre in my personal space, you nuisance.â You huffed and lightly shoved him in his chest where he wasnât scarred. âI said the kettle thing because you are just as bad as me, Eddie. Like today?â
Eddieâs grin faltered and he took a few steps back, raising his hands up defensively. Though it was clear in his âkicked puppyâ expression that your comment hurt more than you intended. You didnât intend any hurt, you were just calling him out on the hypocrisy. But the damage had been done and he let out a slow breath, running a hand through his long curly hair.
âYeah, well... In my defense, a year ago today I thought Iâd be dead. SoâŠâ
Now it was your turn to let out a slow breath. The blush that filled your cheeks mere moments ago quickly dwindled as you felt guilt wash over you. You inhaled slowly and then exhaled just as slowly, then gently put your hands on his shoulders. When he didnât look at you right away, you moved one hand to his chin and angled his face so he had no choice but to look at you.
âHey, come on. Eddie⊠Look at me, you know I didnât mean it like that. Why donât you go sort out some movies for tonight, pick some good ones so we can both get out of our heads, huh? Iâll take care of snacks.â You suggested, thinking a night spent watching movies and laughing your heads off would do you both some good.
***
By the time you got the popcorn all ready and separated into two bowls, Eddie had cleared the living room table of his drug paraphernalia and had picked out Ferris Buellerâs Day Off and Princess Bride. Ferris Bueller was one you introduced to Eddie because it reminded you of him. And Princess Bride was a recommendation from Robin, that you immediately loved as soon as you saw it. You were surprised to see it on the entertainment stand next to the TV, considering Eddie never really showed an interest in it before, but it was your favorite movie so you were grateful for his consideration.Â
As Eddie walked over to the TV and knelt down to pop Ferris Buellerâs Day Off into the VCR, you took your seat on the couch and put the two bowls down on the table. Grabbing a nearby blanket that Eddie had gotten for you since you loved getting comfy during movie nights, you tucked yourself into the couch and wrapped the blanket around yourself, the plush blanket being so big that there was still room for him to join you under it if he wanted to.
When he didnât join you right away, you watched as he stayed in front of the TV, still kneeling down and a small smile tugged at your lips as you realized he was waiting for it to rewind.
âYou forgot to rewind it again, didnât you?â
He glanced over his shoulder from where he was kneeling down and threw you a wide grin.
âWhat? Nah, I just thought itâd be more fun if I watched the movie right here. You know, itâs really comfy being on my knees on this cold wooden floor instead of joining you on the couch like usual. I can really enjoy the details of the movie from here.â
Just as he expected and hoped, his response earned him a roll of your eyes and an even wider smile. He loved seeing you smile, especially if it was caused by something he said or did.
âAlright smartass. Why donât you go get a shirt on and then come join me on the couch? Iâm sure the ointmentâs dried by now.â You quipped, reminding Eddie of his lack of shirt. He raised an eyebrow and looked down at his bare torso, then shrugged.Â
âIf itâs all the same to you, princess,â He said as he got up off the floor with an unceremonious groan, wiping his knees free of dust, âIâm quite comfortable without one.â
Right. Of course he was comfortable. Why wouldnât he be? This wasnât something out of the norm. Eddie was always comfortable around you.
He made his way over to the couch and plopped down on his spot on the couch opposite you, causing the leather to creak slightly from the impact. Once he was settled in, he grabbed the bunched up section of the blanket between you two on the couch and covered his lap. Since it was his movie, you handed him the remote to the VCR and leaned forward to grab your bowl of popcorn as the movie started playing.Â
It wasnât long before the sound of popcorn being munched could be heard between the sounds of the movie, the lighthearted tone causing some much needed laughter from you and Eddie both. Whatever darkness that had gripped his mind so tight earlier in the bathroom seemed to be slowly fading away to the levity of shared laughter at the antics of Ferris Bueller and his friends.
Near the end of the movie, you heard Eddie let out a derisive snort and you tilted your head to look over at him.
âMan, why didnât I ever come up with any of this?â He joked, stretching his long legs out to rest on the coffee table now that his bowl of popcorn was empty. You rolled your eyes and reached over to swat at his legs, always on his case about putting his feet on the table. But he simply grinned and lifted his leg away from your reach.
âBecause you and I both know that you hate being sick, so faking it would be out of the question. It wouldn't be believable. Besides, I doubt Wayne would fall for the kind of tricks Ferris pulled on his parents. Your uncle is much smarter than that.â You retorted playfully.
âYeah, okay. You might have a point.â He quipped, still grinning away like a cat that got the cream.
âJust admit I'm right, it'll be easier for both of us."Â
âNever. Where's the fun in that?" He fired back as he got up from the couch, making his way over to the TV to rewind Ferris Bueller before popping it out to put Princess Bride in.
âI'm surprised you picked Princess Bride as our second movie. I was under the impression it was too mushy-gushy for you.â You called out to him from your comfy spot on the couch.
âThatâs just outright incorrect, Angel. It's got adventure and fantasy elements, not just the romance shit. This has Eddie Munson-approved written alllll over it.âÂ
You raised a curious eyebrow at Eddie's new pet name for you, watching him as he moved from kneeling in front of the TV back to his spot on the couch.
âAngel? That's a new one, Eds, where'd that come from?â
He leaned forward towards the coffee table and grabbed the remote, turning to hand it to you with that cheeky smile on his face.
"Well, I can't call you Doc anymore, at your request, but you did save me. Like a guardian angel looking out for me. Soooo⊠Angel.â He explained, finally handing the remote over.
Huh. Well, you couldn't fault him. It did make sense logically. But something about the way he had said it felt different. Like it wasn't just him calling you by pet names like usual.
You hit the play button on the remote and watched out of the corner of your eye as he relaxed into the couch once more, a sense of contentment and relief washing over you to see that Eddie no longer had that haunted look on his face that he had earlier when you first came home.
As the movie played on, you found yourself getting more comfortable on the couch by leaning closer to your roommate, though if he noticed he didnât say anything. Oftentimes during movie nights, you had wondered what leaning into his side might feel like, if heâd run his fingers through your hair as your cheek laid against his chest while you listened to your heartbeat.
You were brought out of your warm thoughts as you heard Eddie quote Inigo Montoyaâs famous line in that well-known theatrical voice of his.
âMy name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!â
Letting out a gasp, you reached over and playfully hit his shoulder with the back of your hand.
âYou have that memorized?â
âCourse I do! I hear Robin quote it all the time to Steve at Family Video. Besides, I like paying attention to things you like.â Eddie spoke as he turned to look at you, still either oblivious or not caring for how much closer you were to him than you were before.
âYou should pay more attention to yourself then.â You immediately responded, mouth speaking faster than your brain.
Eddie blinked once, then twice, then a slow grin broke out on his face as he turned towards you. He put a hand on his chest and let out a very dramatic gasp in classic Eddie Munson fashion.
âYou like me? Iâm so flattered, Angel.â
Shit. You definitely didnât mean for that to come out.
âWait, hold on. Thatâs not what I- I didnât mean it like that.â You stammered, feeling your cheeks warm up immediately.
Without hesitation, he grabbed your hand and pulled you close, grinning from ear to ear. Youâre now pressed into his side, exactly like you were daydreaming about mere moments ago.
âSo youâre saying you donât? I think your rosy cheeks beg to differ.â
âEddie.â
âYeah?â
â...Shut up.â
âAs you wish.â
You were about to make a comment about the timing of him saying Westleyâs line at the same time as the movie when suddenly Eddieâs lips were on yours. The movie no longer had your attention and quickly became background noise.
But just as you were about to press back into the kiss, you were disappointed when he pulled away, a shit-eating grin full of mischief spread wide across his face as he looked at you.
Oh. Of course. Well, two could play that game. You werenât going to let him just get away with that.
Without hesitation you reached both of your hands forward and cupped his cheeks, then pulled him in for another kiss. You felt him chuckle against your lips a moment later and this time, it was your turn to pull away.
âI knew it. I knew you liked me.â He whispered as he looked into your eyes. He lifted one hand towards your face and gently cupped your jaw, lightly tracing your burning cheek with a thumb.
âI donât think the term like is adequate enough.â You murmured honestly, cheeks burning even hotter as you let slip just a tiny bit of your true feelings.
Eddieâs eyes widened and he brought his other hand up to your other cheek, holding your face oh so gently. Then a warm smile tugged at his lips as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against yours.
âI donât think like is adequate enough for me either, sweetheart.â
âEddieâŠâ
âIâve been crushing on you since the moment you refused to give up on me when you were tutoring me. But it stopped being a crush the moment you agreed to be my roommate. Itâs been so difficult not pulling you close for movie nights, I didnât want to overstep in case you didnât feel the same way.â He explained, tucking a loose strand of your hair behind your ear, tracing your ear with his fingers. âAnd every time you were standing so close to me and taking care of my scars, I was always so tempted to kiss you right then and there.â
âThatâs⊠Really funny. I was always denying my own feelings because I was afraid we didnât have enough in common for you to like me back. Seeing you shirtless drove me crazy, I was always tempted to kiss you or cuddle up to you. Youâre always so warm that I keep thinking cuddling you would be like cuddling a dragon.â You confessed, feeling butterflies in your chest as your cheeks warmed up even further. You were probably as red as a tomato by this point.
âA⊠dragon? Really?â Eddie deadpanned, though he couldnât resist a small grin. Only for it to falter as the rest of your words registered. âWait, what do you mean about not having enough in common, Angel?â
âJust⊠that Iâm not really into metal like you are, I canât partake in weed, and Iâm not super interested in D&D.â
âWell, if any of that was a problem, I wouldnât have asked you to be my roomie. Besides, you might be more into reading books and creating art instead of heavy metal, drugs, and D&D, but you know what? How many times did I go to you for art concepts for Corroded Coffin promo posters and ideas for campaigns based on the books you read? You may not be all that into Dungeons and Dragons or into metal music, but you inspire me anyways. I have my own creative streak, but you always take it to a higher level.â Eddie reassured you, continuing to caress your burning cheek with his thumb.
You pulled your head back enough to look at him, taking a moment to gaze into those warm brown eyes you had always previously struggled to not get lost in, in order to avoid staring too long. But now? With everything spilled and out in the open? You werenât going to hold back.
â...You wanna know why I agreed to be your roommate?â You whispered as you moved one hand over his hand on your cheek, lacing your fingers with his. Your hands and Eddieâs now making their way to the couch cushions between the two of you.
âUhh, because the market is absolute shit and you have to be like Loch Nora levels rich to afford a place by yourself?â Eddie retorted softly, causing you to roll your eyes and smile.
âWell, that too. But mainly⊠because after the events of the Upside Down, I knew you needed someone, just like I did. Youâre carrying the same darkness I am, Eds, just a different kind. You nearly died; of course you're going to have doubts about life and where you belong. The scars from those demon bats don't help either, and I know for a fact you hate your body. Between your earlier outburst and the way you were staring at yourself when I walked in? That wasn't the look of Eddie Munson being smug and proud of his tattoos like usual, that was the look of a man who didn't recognize himself anymore. But from where I stand? You're still my best friend and I love you. Whatever way you look or how you feel about your body doesnât change how I feel.â
Eddie blinked at you, taken aback and stunned by your supportive words. The fact that you felt the same way, that you agreed to be his roommate because you knew he needed you and you needed him burrowed its way deep into his bones. You loved him. He couldnât believe it.
Which is exactly why he had an inkling of self-doubt creep in from the back of his mind like a parasite.
â⊠Angel, you must be some kinda freak if you love me with how scarred and fucked up I am after the Upside Down shit.â
You stared at him, really stared. Was he being serious right now? You would go to the Upside Down and back a million times over if it meant proving just how much he meant to you.
âIf I had a problem with how scarred and fucked up you are, I wouldnât have gotten you that numbing cream and I wouldnât help you get it applied properly when you need me to. Besides, just because mine arenât physical doesnât mean I donât have scars from the Upside Down either. I meant what I said Eddie. I. Love. You.â
You reinforced your feelings by pressing a kiss to his forehead, cheek, and then a quick kiss on his lips after each of those last three words.
Eddie didnât smirk, grin, or make one of his snarky comments. Not even a joke slipped from his mouth as he stared at you.Â
Oh he was definitely whipped for you.
âYou know, sweetheart⊠Iâm not entirely incompetent when it comes to applying that ointment⊠I just prefer it when you do it. Youâre always so gentle with me. And so warm. I felt so cold earlier, when it was just me and my scars. Then you got home and you touched me like I was something precious.â He spoke softly, soft chocolate brown eyes gazing into yours.
âYou are something precious. Youâre precious to me, Eddie. Scars and all.â
There you went again, turning his life upside down (no pun intended). Saying such sweet and soft words to him like it was the easiest thing for you to do.Â
He snorted, but it was lacking any real humor or laughter.
âYou really are a freak. But youâre my freak. And us freaks gotta stick together. Câmere, angel.â
Eddie then pulled you over to his side of the couch and moved his legs so that you could sit comfortably between them, with your back to his chest. As soon as he was sure you were settled, he wrapped his arms around your waist and laid his chin on top of your head, letting out a slow breath to relax into the intimacy of the moment of finally having you in his arms.Â
As you relaxed, you laid your arms across his and felt⊠peaceful. The movie had gone on in the background so long by this point that credits were rolling. But you didnât care about it, honestly you stopped paying attention awhile ago.Â
The only story you cared about now was the one between you and Eddie Munson. And whatever the journey ahead held for you both, you would do it together.
