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ojovivo
$LAYYYTER
Today's Document
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
sheepfilms
Product Placement
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todays bird
we're not kids anymore.
hello vonnie
I'd rather be in outer space šø
Peter Solarz
NASA
will byers stan first human second
romaā
Sweet Seals For You, Always
izzy's playlists!
Keni
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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@kalimorrigan
Hey Hi Hello and Howdy!
This is the unhinged feral wrestling fan and weird humor/just odd things blog @scream-for-me-again
For all gore and bloody things needs, see me @to-spite-your-face
And the spicy naughty naked me, @demon-thyme
Charlize Theron as Mary Ann Lomax The Devilās Advocate (1997) dir. Taylor Hackford
āCave Johnson here. Iāve received complaints from anonymous employees that our support of the āhomosexual lifestyleā is ādegenerateā and āirresponsibleā. It really got me thinking and I think I found a solution. So good news! We now have 23 vacated positions reserved for members of the LGBT community. Additional good news, we began a new testing initiative on evolutionary degenration with 23 test subjects all ready to go.ā
āCave Johnson here. If youāre experiencing a time loop in which youāre repeating the month of June over and over, thatās totally intentional. We at Aperture Science felt that pride month was not long enough and so we created this loop to let employees experience as much pride as they feel like. To get out of this loop, simply use the pod labeled āTime Machineā in Shaft 6 and then either kill or save the baby on the other end depending on when in the loop youāre on. Donāt worry about the babyās identity, he grows up to be an asshole.ā
āCave Johnson here, happy to announce that our Rainbow Gel project was a massive success. We have developed distinct gels in every color of the rainbow pride flag. In fact, it was too much of a success, so weāll be updating our pride flag accordingly to include 75 new colors corresponding to all of our new gels. Word of advice, though, donāt stare at the flag for too long, most of these colors havenāt been tested on human eyes yet.ā
āCave Johnson here, Cave Johnson queer. Get used to it.ā
āCave Johnson here. Caroline just informed me that I am herĀ ābeardā. I checked, and I fail to see how I could possibly have grown out of her face. If anybody knows anything about human-to-facial hair transmogrification, please report to my office.ā
āCave Johnson here. Friendly reminder that Aperture employees living prior to the legalization of gay marriage are invited to use our Aperture Science Temporal Matrimony Pod in order to travel to the future with your same-sex partner and get married there. Employees from the future who wish to return to a time before gay people being able to marry are also welcome to use the pod and weāll make sure to send you to an era well before gay marriage. Iām thinking maybe Late Cretacesous.ā
āCave Johnson here. Iām proud to announce that our plan to hire only female test subjects to prevent them from flirting with our female scientists has been a resounding failure.ā
āCave Johnson here. Iām afraid weāll have to temporarily pause all experimentation with the Gender Affirmation Beam. The testing itself is going great, the beam is working. But weāre starting to run out of thigh high socks and khaki shorts.ā
āCave Johson here. Shafts 10 through 14 are currently under lockdown due to a meltdown in the Neopronoun Syntheizer. The transphobes up in DC might call that āa disaster in the makingā but I call it a win for diversity! That being said most of these pronouns are radioactive so do watch out.ā
Cave Johnson here. If you feel a sudden sense of elation and contentness when putting on your new Aperture Science unisex uniform, that is not Gender Euphoria! Thatās a hallucinogenic fungus taking over your brain. Take the uniform off immediately and throw it in the nearest incinerator.ā
āCave Johnson here. I wonāt tolerate any misgendering of the interdimensional invaders swarming the facility! Their pronouns are they/them and weāre ought to respect that. Weāre also ought to shoot them on sight since theyāre extremely hostile and bent on enslaving our planet.ā
āCave Johnson here. To all of my suitors and secret admirers: Thank you, honestly Iām flattered. Unfortunately for you, I donāt swing that way. Or any way. I only swing where the wrecking ball of science takes me. Usually into a brick wall.ā
āCave Johnson here. Iāve been thinking. We have gay pride, and we have gender envy. What other deadly sins can we incorporate? Maybe bisexual sloth? Lesbian wrath? Iāll talk to the lab boys about it.ā
āCave Johnson here. Update: The Lesbian Wrath project is postponed indefinitely. My condolences to the families of the deceased. Though letās be honest, they probably had it coming.ā
āCave Johnson here. For the last time! āIām reclaiming the slurā is not a valid excuse to shout out loud the killer androidsā activation codes! We picked that word for a reason.ā
āCave Johnson here. Iād like to apologize to Floor 194 Safety Supervisor Doug Blakely for firing him after allegations that he was forcing employees back in the closet. I was not aware that said closet was a literal storage closet for zombified Aperture employees. To make it up to Doug, heāll be allowed to feed Floor 194 HR Manager Lisa Briant to the closet zombies if he so chooses.ā
āCave Johnson here. A reminder that next year Transgender Day of Visibility falls on Extradimensional Day of Visibility. The lab boys are cautioning me to caution you to be prepared. Do not confuse transgender and transdimensional! Big mistake.ā
āCave Johnson here. To all cishet Aperture employees who volunteered for the āGet More Wokeā program, please report to your departmentās OR at the nearest convenience to get the alarm clocks surgically removed from your spinal cord. Aperture Science apologizes for the misunderstanding.ā
āCave Johnson here. Dr. Barnaby from Cyborg Engineering is an attack helicopter. Thatās not a transphobic joke, by the way, they literally transformed themselves into an amalgam of human and helicopter. Impressive. Unauthorized, of course, but still impressive. Anyway, we lost track of them, so everyone watch the sky for a mad scientist with blue rotors and machine guns.ā
āCave Johnson here. To the joker who added āmake the sun gayā to our quarterly agenda, I hope youāre pleased with yourself. The Astrophysics Department is tearing itself apart with half of them shouting that you canāt make the sun gay and the other half screaming that the sun is already gay. Either way, weāre not doing it.ā
āCave Johnson here. The congressional delegation of Senator Patrick Johnson (no relation) to inspect our facilities had to be cut short due to a mishap with the Gender Affirmation Beam. Iād like to apologize on behalf of Aperture Science to Senator Johnson and her staff.ā
āCave Johnson here. Just the other day, our sign guy asked me āCave, donāt you think LGBTQIA2S+ is a tad too long?ā and I told him āFirst of all, thatās Mr. Johnson to you! And secondly, I actually think itās not long enough!ā and thatās why Iām adding an ā&ā to the acronym. Donāt know what it stands for yet, but Iāll figure it out.ā
āCave Johnson here. You already know that here in Aperture Science weāre all about gender affirming care. Weāve been at the forefront of hormone replacement therapy since before we knew what these hormones do. You also know that here in Aperture Science weāre all about not getting sued. So everyone be quiet about our role in the Estrogen Cola disaster.ā
āCave Johnson here. So far, we received 832 submissions to our Homophobia Remover design competition. Unfortunately, 829 had to be disqualified for being a schematic of a gun. Objectively hilarious, but not what weāre looking for. Wait, the lab boys just got another submission: andā¦ itās another gun. Keep at it, folks.ā
āCave Johnson here. Using a set of genetically identical triplets and a molecular combinizer, we just proved scientifically that being bisexual isnāt the same as being half-straight and half-gay. Now we just need to figure out how to separate Craigstopher back into his component brothers.ā
This Doonesbury abortion cartoon was originally written by Gary Trudeau in 2012, in response to a Texas law requiring women to have an ultrasound before an abortion. It was banned from many major newspapers, and they ran syndicated cartoons in its place.
Now seems like an appropriate time to bring these cartoons back, with the passing of Texasā new law requiring the burial or cremation of miscarried or aborted fetal remains. I guess weāll have to wait and see if Trudeau decides to write the sequel.
(Source)
God. Youāll have to excuse me openly weeping atm. I remember being horrified when that law hit the books here.
I had no idea how much worse it would get in 10 yearās time.
Kinda wild how they paint themselves as heroes against us savage baby killing liberals and then they proceed to do some of the most deranged shit to fetuses Iāve ever seen.
Not bad, the feeling of imperfection
I wanna lick and drool all over her neck āĖā¹ į°
Her as young Charles Lee Ray could GET IT
Reddit user has cracked the code on how to read fanfic and study at the same time
(image via twitter)
original reddit post
Inde Navarrette ph. by Nick Rasmussen for Schƶn! Magazine
BAILEYāS 3K CELEBRATIONĀ āš«¶š» for @lucy-harker
āYou are no different from anyone else. We are all the same but in different words. With different bodies, different versions, like insects. Meat!" ā Isabelle Adjani as Anna in Possession (1981) dir. Andrzej Å»uÅawski
BACKROOMS (2026)
Depeche Modeās 1993 album, Songs of Faith and Devotion booklet.
He is my princess diana
Happy Pride Month to those two women dancing together in the foreground of the boat scene in Godzilla (1954).
Iām sorry your romantic foibles were overshadowed by a big ass atomic lizard thing.
Remember when Lil Nas X beautifully explored his sexuality, seduced and killed the devil to the banger of all time, and instead of cheering on this openly gay and proud Black artist for his artistry and fighting back against respectability politics, suddenly said respectability politics was all the Queerest Place on the Internet cared about? Hm. Wonder what happened there.
Anyway I miss him and hope he's doing better with his mental health šš¾
āMultiple leviathan classlifeforms detectedā is an incredible line, and Iām astounded that they one upped it in Subnautica 2 with four words
āYou are being huntedā
Ju-on: The Grudge (2002) Directed by Takashi Shimizu
